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It're pretty clear to anyone watching the radar that the so-called 'plane' is actually a missile. There's already several reports of 'maintenance workers' who have never been seen before or since placing boxes on the support beams for the Gulf of Thailand and the South China Sea. What isn't the government telling us? 
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Mar 8, 2014 16:02
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Big Beef City posted:I'm hearing a lot of unconfirmed reports that the plane actually flew through the atmosphere and has esccaped earth's gravity. Current destination unknown! It's currently flying over Jurrassic Vietnam. If they turn around, they might be able to get to 1940's Hanoi.
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Mar 8, 2014 17:38
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The Biscuit posted:Probably overstaying his visa in Australia and didn't want to go back. Just another innocent case of Austria/Australia confusion. I'm sure the two countries have a red phone for the other country just to deal with that kinda poo poo.
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Mar 9, 2014 01:44
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genesplicer posted:Unless this was some sort of test for a more ambitious attack later on. Like what, though? I mean, a proof of concept attack seems like a massive security risk for an organization.
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Mar 9, 2014 04:54
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The plane never existed. This is all the hallucination of an air safety inspector, haunted by a crash he failed to discover the cause of 15 years ago.
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Mar 9, 2014 22:32
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genesplicer posted:Seth McFarlane missed his flight, which later ended up bringing down the South Tower. If only he had made it. Those 'terrorists' would have been loving heroes.
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Mar 10, 2014 14:50
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AKA Pseudonym posted:Good run down of the current facts from the BBC. Including the revalation that they're looking for the plane by just standing on the beach and listening really closely. They're puttering around the ocean, calling a cellphone number over and over their ears straining to hear something other than waves. "You hear anything yet?" "Nothing... What if it's on vibrate?" "poo poo, you're right. Let's look for bubbles or something, too."
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Mar 10, 2014 17:18
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Knight Corgi posted:Are those people sociopaths or what. My Plane Just Crashed, SOOOO?!!!!!
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Mar 14, 2014 00:53
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nnnotime posted:
Then it's "long pig" so it still counts
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Mar 16, 2014 21:25
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But what if instead it's raw Chinese person he's holding in the bowl?
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awesome-express posted:Who's Ocam and why does he have a razor He needed to shave, so he stole the plane. Simplest explanation.
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Mar 17, 2014 22:47
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duckmaster posted:Hypothesis 1: The plane was hijacked by terrorists. Evidence: Seriously, guys, what's so hard to understand? The plane lost its connection to the Platonic ideal of 'plane' and dissipated into the ether.
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Mar 17, 2014 23:05
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Dreamlogic posted:As you yourself said, "the plane disappeared" is a fact, not a hypothesis. You don't need to apply Occam's razor to determine that because it's been clearly established. What are you trying to accomplish here. It's the Allegory of the Gooncave, it think. Right now he's the goon in the cave, only able to see vague silhouettes of Wikipedia articles cast by the glow of an LCD screen, trying to form his worldview.
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Mar 17, 2014 23:09
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It's probably a perfectly innocent plane that crashed three months ago and now the plane's airline will get hounded by reporters wanting to know if the plane had any terror connections.
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Mar 19, 2014 13:37
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Solice Kirsk posted:I think it's a safe bet to say that everyone on that plane, including the pilots, were actually bigfoots. From the passenger list, the plane carried the following: - 6 Bunyips - 2 Wendigos - 152 Yerens - 4 Peludas - Jackie Chan - 5 Pogeyans - 7 Orang Pendeks - 2 I dunno, some kinda Iranian ghost - 50 Orang Mawas - 1 Flying Dutchman - 2 Hakawais - 1 Chuchunya - 1 Hungry Ghost - 2 Pripyat mutants - 3 Bigfoots My theory is that Josh Gates stole the plane.
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Mar 22, 2014 19:25
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hofnar posted:Gonna have to explain this one a little better I'd have figured they were trash just from the game screenshot. 18 months and 'Australia' is upside down on the mini-map? 
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Mar 22, 2014 20:24
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Taliaquin posted:I'm really not sure about this list. I don't think the Flying Dutchman would actually fit on a 777 due to weight limits, like that time Kevin Smith got thrown off a plane, only with sails instead of XXXX(?)L t-shirts. I believe you'll find that not only are ghosts weightless, they also don't need seat belt extenders.
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Mar 22, 2014 21:28
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Taliaquin posted:Then why don't they make the whole plane out of ghosts then? Couldn't sink if it were weightless. True but have you ever tried tying ghosts together?
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Mar 22, 2014 22:24
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never trust an elf posted:Not in the USA Sure it is Making a kid and raising a kid are entirely separate things.
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Mar 23, 2014 15:55
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Disconnecticus posted:"Holy God, You sure heard what happened to MH370. I cannot stop thinking about this. This is a true miracle for the books." Well, I think that just about makes up for everything, there, God. Good job, buddy.
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Mar 23, 2014 20:26
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James Polk posted:okay, this is a pretty "out there" theory, but what are the odds that the plane crashed into the ocean killing all those aboard? Yeah right, and the moon landings were faked. Wait, I should pick something that's actually bullshit Yeah right, and Oswald was - poo poo, wait. Yeah right, and Obama is Ameri - damnit, this is harder than I thought.
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Mar 23, 2014 20:38
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Big Beef City posted:I have a very chillax blue collar dad who never goes out for conspiracy theories. If that was the case, the governments involved could just keep playing dumb and not bother negotiating because whoever took 'em hasn't bothered to make it public. Why pay money to kidnappers when you can just go to the families all "Welp, they crashed and sank into the *mumble mumble* trench. It's too deep so we'll never be able to recover them. PEACE!"
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Mar 23, 2014 23:17
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Evil_Greven posted:Well now, this is interesting: It's not painted black and there's not a sputtering fuse on it so I dunno where they're getting bomb from.
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Mar 26, 2014 14:17
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Rambling Robot posted:OUR Maddie <3 Not my Maddie She was selected, not elected
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Mar 26, 2014 22:49
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Evil_Greven posted:Oh hey, the Maldives National Defense Force figured out it wasn't a bomb. Would they be able to determine what plane - if any - it came from? Or are there not gigantic binders for each plane that just have the serial numbers for all their components like I'm suddenly imagining. Because I'm picturing a comically huge binder being leafed through by a comically tiny and ancient librarian.
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Mar 27, 2014 19:45
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That's pretty much what I thought. Too many parts, too many planes, not enough money, time, or people. But frankly, any system that doesn't have a dude who looks like a mini Woodhouse manhandling a cobweb covered book the size of a linebacker onto an antique wooden table is a failure of a system 
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Mar 27, 2014 20:07
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Trixie Hardcore posted:There's got to be plenty of people with autism who would work on the cheap doing this exact thing. Work for cheap? They'd probably pay a monthly subscription to do it.
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Mar 27, 2014 20:52
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redshirt posted:This. The plane is viral marketing for the Syfy Original Movie "Bermuda Tentacles"
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Mar 31, 2014 15:11
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The search teams are really over thinking this. They just need to stop looking and go about their business. Once the plane no longer feels threatened, it'll come out on its own. A sprinkling of jet fuel might help too. The plane will feel safer if it associated them with getting food.
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Apr 1, 2014 17:18
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Toadvine posted:Has Diego Garcia been discussed/dismissed? LOL dude instagrammed a picture of the inside of his rear end
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Apr 3, 2014 11:58
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mstrkrft posted:yeah fuckin poseidon hijacked that fucker right into the ocean. thats a fact id say The pilot offended Poseidon before take off and the plane now has to wander to atone. He'll make it home eventually, but everyone one else will be eaten by a cyclops, turned to pigs, or eaten by Charybdis or whatever I dunno it's been years since I read the Odyssey
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Apr 4, 2014 19:24
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No Gravitas posted:I do wonder where is that airplane. "A-plane, a-plane, a-planey-OOOOOOHHH!" "Have you checked the bureau?!"
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Apr 4, 2014 23:15
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Drunk & Ugly posted:the page the goon linked (http://intellihub.com/freelance-jou...e-diego-garcia/ ) says an IPAD 5. he must have inner strength One of the related articles: Girlfriend of 370 passenger Wood: ‘Fighter jets accompanied flight 370 in secret militarized operation, my husband is still alive’ Who cares about your husband, lady? Or was he on the same plane as Wood? Did they know they were both loving the same woman?
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Apr 10, 2014 18:17
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Slap Happy posted:Okay, forgive me if this theory has already been put forth: It was a the maiden flight of a plane built from the same stuff the black boxes are made of.
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Apr 11, 2014 16:35
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Dude probably butt-dialed a contact and even if the call was connected all the way through - which it probably wasn't because it's on a loving plane - no one's gonna tell us what the few second conversation even was... Ah, who gives a poo poo, get the graphics design interns on this poo poo! 
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Apr 12, 2014 16:27
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ethanol posted:Joke is on him, no cell towers at the bottom of the ocean. Should have tried whale calls The co-pilot took that picture then shoved his phone up Philip Wood's rear end as they diverted to Diego Garcia
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Apr 12, 2014 17:18
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DEAR RICHARD posted:How many pieces were they? tia For the passengers, it might be better to measure them in terms of volume.
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Apr 13, 2014 02:14
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Lobok posted:A new movie about the tragedy, directed by Chinatown: gently caress, you mean I gotta wait to know what I have until October 3rd? 
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Apr 15, 2014 18:55
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No. 6 posted:Can any of us ever truly be found? The plane is real. It is we who are lost in the ocean of realities.
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May 7, 2014 04:02
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Drunk & Ugly posted:Anybody else see malaysia airlines and shot down and assume they finally found the other one or something I just assumed it was a hoax at first. "Hey news outlets, I know where that missing plane went! Ukraine!"
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Jul 17, 2014 17:02
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VikingSkull posted:it's possible that whoever shot it down mistook it for one of Ukraine's AN-124's, as well I doubt it because didn't one of the rebel leadership specifically call it an AN-26 when they proudly announced the shoot-down?
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Jul 22, 2014 01:15
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