FARTHOUSE 5: - sounds funny but ultimately you just shit your pants

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iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Febreeze posted:

Tom Brady is the Goat. It's about time I just accepted it
http://www.thedrawplay.com/comic/tom-brady-the-goat/

I appreciate the 18-1 pun.

# ¿ May 17, 2017 00:56

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 23:18

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

shirts and skins posted:

It's also insane that it summarily ended Janet Jackson's career. Super Bowl halftime to nothing.

I'd say Black Eyed Peas killed their careers more on the halftime stage.

# ¿ May 21, 2017 12:29

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

The only way you can get me to eat peanut butter is in a reese's. Otherwise gently caress that poo poo.

And eat it properly, you savages. The whole thing in your mouth at once.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2017 03:39

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

I had someone ask me what type of oil we used in the deep fryers. Correctly assumed it was due a peanut allergy, but thankfully for her, we didn't use that.

# ¿ Jun 5, 2017 19:26

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Like Taco Bell.

# ¿ Jun 7, 2017 05:17

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Flikken posted:

There is always racing

This.

Well, the only race on now is currently being delayed by storms.

Or you can watch people bike in France.

# ¿ Jul 1, 2017 18:31

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

College football is great when you work at a place with TVs all over and you want an excuse to not put cable news channels on.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 17:33

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

swickles posted:

The difference between college and the NFL is that you root for a team in the NFL. In college football, I don't give a poo poo if the Gators win, but if Georgia or FSU lose in any fashion my week is loving made. Its not about wanting a team to win, its about wanting your rivals to lose and maybe even die horribly.

Now, if you are watching football for the actual play on the field, college is fun because of the sheer variety and sometimes batshit crazyness of the offenses and it works. Yes, there is talent disparity, but that is what makes it fun to watch. Watching a next level WR clown a bunch of guys is super fun. Yeah, it sucks when one team is blowing out another, but its super fun to watch 11 guys try to tackle Cam or Tebow or even Manziel and looking like they are on skates.

Every time the Bears, Vikings, Lions, or Patriots lose, I'm happy.

I get the same thing with other sports too (gently caress the Cubs especially).

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 18:45

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

swickles posted:

If NASCAR drives acted like pro wrestlers I would totally watch it.

They sort of do? You'll occasionally get fights between drivers on track.

Flikken posted:

Mel, watch Indy.

Also this.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 18:55

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Right turns are haram

Hell, NASCAR is so pro wrestling most of the heel drivers have cheating managers who distract the refs

Don't get me started on Chad Knaus

Indy just got done racing at the oval in Iowa :colbert:

Which the Cup refuses to race at because ~reasons~.

Flikken posted:

You know Indy is like half Ovals right?

Closer to a third, really. Phoenix, Indy, Texas, Iowa, Pocono, Gateway.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 18:57

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mel Mudkiper posted:

The best part is when NASCAR does road courses and the whole race is dominated by these European ringers brought in by the cheaper teams who aren't competing for points

Road courses have kept Boris Said employed for decades

Actually they all did lovely this year, at least at Sonoma.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

If you guys want to hear the single dumbest thing in all of sports let me tell you about "The Chase for the Championship" and how it basically killed NASCAR ever being a major US sport.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 19:09

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Metapod posted:

Auto racing isn't a sport so why would it ever become a major us sport

You shut your whore mouth.

And real talk, NASCAR was, at one point, as popular as the NFL.

Then they proceeded to get way too high on their own farts and proceeded to poo poo it all up.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 19:52

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Hey hey hey I know what will give us more mainstream credibility, let's completely de value our championship so that we can try to boost ratings at Homestead Miami

Yup, and shove Atlanta somewhere where it doesn't matter.

Though racing as a whole is on a major decline. The loss of tobacco backing it was a huge blow, and we're still suffering the effects.

Oh, and NASCAR finally gave into fans and is introducing a road course in the chase (or playoffs, whatever). loving. Charlotte. Roval.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 19:58

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Mr. France sir, I was thinking maybe we could invest interest in the sport with some more interesting tracks like Bristol

"gently caress that, give me a few more 1.5 mile ovals"

From what I understand, part of why they're so popular is because you can build a 100k person grandstand on the front stretch.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:05

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Eli Wiggum posted:

As someone who knows nothing about NASCAR, what's the difference between "The Chase for the Championship" and what they were doing before?

Basically, before the chase, it was whoever had the best average finish (with a couple bonuses for leading a lap and leading the most laps in a race) won the championship.

Then Matt Kenseth came along, and won the championship while only winning one race. Mind you, this was when NASCAR was really taking off.

So they changed everything to emphasize wins more, with a "win and you're in" thing for the last part of the season where only a dozen drivers could win the Cup. Then the made it sort of round based where you can win and automatically move on, and then the best finisher of the remaining drivers in the last race wins it all.

They're constantly changing it too.

AAAAA! Real Muenster posted:

I cant imagine actually going to a racetrack to watch a bunch of cards drive in a circle (oval, whatever) for hours on end.

Road courses are more fun, if you ask me (obviously some people will disagree and that's just fine), but it's harder to see all the action at once.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:08

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Flikken posted:

These guys are being put under similar exertions as fighter pilots.

Yup. There was a CART race scheduled for Texas Motor Speedway. It's a high banked oval. In 900+ HP cars.

They had to cancel the race because they were pulling so much Gs in the turns there were gray-outs and g-LOC concerns.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:11

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

NHRA moved to a playoff style format, but given the nature of drag racing, no one really noticed in the end.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:13

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Hockles posted:

Counterargument --

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9fB1IcTD48

Dick Trickle :smith:

He... went out in a very sad way.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:17

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Mel Mudkiper posted:

I remember back when NASCAR used to have celebrities sit in the passenger side of a car during pre-race and the result was always pants-wetting terror

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vtcbsi8itHw&t=230s

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:20

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Also, some people only watch racing to maybe catch something like this:
http://i.imgur.com/Mk7Efsp.mp4

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:24

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Eli Wiggum posted:

did I just watch someone die

Nope! Walked away. Won a race a month later.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:27

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Flikken posted:

No and the car that ran beneath won the race.

Close, 2nd.

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:28

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Flikken posted:

You can still get injured, ask Sebastian Bordeaux or James Hinchcliffe.

Bourdais's crash was a lot worse than Dixon's (the one I linked). Dixon's was spectacular and lucky, Bourdais's was straight into the wall and broke his pelvis.

Flikken posted:

Lost a piece of his winglet there too.

Did the cameraman on the other side of the fence get hurt? I can't remember, I know they took him to the hospital to check on him.

Yeah, he was fine.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

For car crashes the weird truth is that the more flippy and insane it looks the safer the crash probably was. The spinning burns off a lot of the energy that would otherwise go into the driver.

Its the ones that don't flip that are scary. Ask Dale.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wf0eqXegpk

He's out for the rest of the season, but he's alive (he went on record saying 20 years ago he'd be dead).

# ¿ Jul 10, 2017 20:31

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

During the Indy 500 intros this year, they did specifically mention the amount of training they do. One of the drivers does Ironmans in his 40s. The pit crews, at least in the US, tend to be former college athletes who weren't able to make the jump to the pros.

# ¿ Jul 13, 2017 03:26