Karma Monkey posted:

They also travel with the Renaissance Festival troupes in the summer months to provide the rubbery half-cooked turkey legs to all the Milords and Miladies. HUZZAH!

13Pandora13 posted:

Every time I see these they look and smell like ham.

Karma Monkey posted:

Well, I'm sure the look/smell is a lot worse when they wrestle those corsets off.

Mans posted:

I need two quotes.


The one with the junkie with the dead arm spinning it around like an helicopter blade and the goon who freaked out at someone askign for smokes so he threw a whole pizza at a kid and fled a parking lot on foot.

tia

WET BUTT posted:

Dr Stigma: We're going to have to amputate your arm you stupid idiot retard
Me: *spins around really fast so my dead arm knocks all the doctors and nurses surrounding me to the ground* *picks up heroin syringe in mouth, leaps out of hospital window like a dog*

Bareback Rodeo posted:

About three months ago I bought a pizza from the local supermarket and decided that eating it in the park over the road might be nice for a change of scenery, so I walked over there and sat down at a bench. At the next one over, there was a group of teenagers drinking and smoking and having a quiet chat.

Now, as soon as I sat down I felt uncomfortable, but it was too late to move so I just kept eating my pizza.

About ten seconds later, one of the taller guys comes over and stands next to me. I thought he was about to make fun of me or something, but when I looked over at his friends they were all preoccupied with themselves, so I looked up at him.

"Yo, [INCOHERENT], you got any weed?"

This guy had no expression on his face at all. He looked like a loving statue. I didn't want any trouble from him, and I didn't have any drugs, so I figured that if I just gave him the rest of my pizza he'd leave me alone.

Anyway, as soon as I gave him the pizza he started laughing. He turned back to his friends, laughing and shaking his head, and then turned back around and handed me the pizza. Then he said something incoherent again and punched me in the shoulder.

What the gently caress was going on? I stood up and tossed the pizza just behind him so he would have to turn around and then I just got the gently caress out of there.

MariusLecter posted:

is it gauche to post a quote from a thread I made?

mr.capps posted:

That doesn't make any sense, because its more humiliating for the pee pee guy then the pee'd guy

Hogge Wild posted:

im gay i'm gay cuckold cuck cuckservative

manyak posted:

when you were young you thought sex was just this thing where you go naked, whatever else. well, eventually you grow up and you realize part of it is about hurting them. you choke them and stuff which even though it seems bad actually adds to the good feeling you get when you cum. so its not a big deal.

no they will not posted:

generally kids have fairly naive ideas about sex and the world, ie that pain is bad and pleasure is good. however, part of maturation involves learning about "coin theory" - the fact that pain and pleasure are actually two sides of the same coin

example
Child: I think pleasure is good and pain is bad
Adult: Actually, pain and pleasure are two sides of the same coin [a/n: coin theory in action]

nockturne posted:

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=292845 (needs archives):

Whiz Palace posted:

Can someone please kill the joke by explaining it to me thanks

Wedemeyer posted:

A New Bully is the worst star wars movie imo.

Crip Killa posted:

With all this talk about Trans rights and bathroom segregation I decided to do my part to break down the walls. I was hanging out around downtown and decided to use the women's bathroom.


probably http://i.imgur.com/7N2h2sx.jpg

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

Cumslut1895 posted:

The Schwa posted:

does anyone have that quote about Waluigi?

DudeGoofyGuy posted:

Tasteful Dickpic posted:

SMG's rap sheet is wonderful

quote:

OH MY GOD. gently caress!!!!!!!ghtful post and I hope you continue to make them in the future. Cheers. User loses posting privileges for 6 hours. no they will not no they will not

Boosted_C5 posted:

Patriot James O'Keefe revealed today what we all knew to be true - it is in fact the Democrats who are not only committing property and personal violence against Trump supporters, but also instigating violence at Trump events as well.

We have the human right to defend ourselves. Be viligant, be ARMED, and respond with appropriate force to Hillary's goons. Don't risk getting beaten to death, don't risk your wife and child getting beaten to death, be prepared to subdue Demonrats with force.

Stay safe out there.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Captain_Maclaine posted:

MOD NOTE

Do not incite political violence, especially in such a Freeper-esque fashion.

texasmed posted:

boosted wasnt inciting violence you loving idiot. he said to defend yourself if you get attacked which any american is free to do without fear of legal repercussion.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

Leper's Coloney posted:

PROBATION 10/17/16 09:44pm texasmed He's coming right for us!! User loses posting privileges for 1 week. zen death robot zen death robot

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL posted:

Finally, whale lice are crustaceans and are specific to whale species (and even gender), so don't worry about one latching on if you swim in the ocean. Unless you're a porpoise or something.

Data Graham posted:

I think a lot of us claim to be

quote:

That horse mocks you. Do you hear the neighing? More like naying! That horse says no to you. The horse is the man of the house. You are the horse. Clop clop! Trot about to your dingy office, little horsey. Your wife kisses her husband-horse when you can't see. And then again when you can. She buys it shoes, finer than any you'll own. Its metal feet crush your soul. "This horse is now man!" it exclaims. "I am defeated!" you cry. The horse has beat you. Soon you'll be in the stall, eating dry, bland grasses, while the majestic Horseband ferries your wife about town. "Oh!" the city folk shall say as they drop to their knees as their muscles fail them at the sight of such a couple. "The horse is such a man!" they weep as they tear out their eyes, knowing they'll never see such beauty again. Your wife and the HorseGod shall laugh and eat gold together. Ha ha! And your tears shall be blood as you shrivel and turn to dust, forgotten in that stall outside the city where the HORSE is now Emperor Of All and Lover Of One. The citizens will genuflect before the great beast, paying whatever tithe the Hoofed One demands, be it of coin or flesh. The people will rejoice to do so, as their Great and Benevolent Equine shall make their crops plenty, and their lives ever long. The rotten stall shall collapse on your worm-eaten bones, and none shall remember a whit about you. Except the UrHorse, the original horse, who shall shed no tear, but blink in bitter recollection of that brief time he had to endure you.

Do not let this come to be. Shoot that horse. With your Glock. Eat its meat. Make a horse stew. Turn its bones into glue, and use it to glue the skull to your wall. Use its hooves to make a tasteless gelatin to encase its eyes in. Do it. Be the man of the house, not the man of the horse. He watches!

Goa Tse-tung posted:

Chuck Buried Treasure posted:

theflyingorc posted:

look to your left, now to your right

one of the three of you is hitler

Comptroll The Forums posted:

probably the guy on the far right

Chichevache posted:

I am 100% shocked and disbeliefed. I want to see the alternative photo.

one of my encounters with him was based on his ridiculous defense of obesity. He sounded like he took it very personally.

Pick posted:

Goa Tse-tung posted:

variation on a classic:

Subjunctive posted:

That wasn't even r/r!

Regrettable posted:

Yep, a goon overdosed and died in a theater, if I remember correctly.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

A theatrical release from the forums.

fruit on the bottom posted:

Leave it to a lobster to boil over.

Say Nothing posted:

Somfin posted:

Man that's one of those faces that looks okay on first glance and then on second glance you realise that every single part of its construction is wrong

RFC2324 posted:

Turn on your monitor

Solice Kirsk posted:

Pick about to go down another spiral of mental collapse?

My Lovely Horse posted:

Sapozhnik posted:

quoting fishmech

Ride The Gravitron posted:

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Syd Midnight posted:

Page 8 of this honeypot

Cubone posted:

me (thinking): heh. it's amazing how easy it is to get goons to overshare. even after all the years of helldumping all it takes is one question about something they don't normally get to talk about.

me (posting): HOMEWRECKING STRAIGHT BOYS. ALSO I LIKE WHEN THE BOTTOM IS EMBARRASSED TO BE GOOD AT BOTTOMING AND I LIKE WHEN T gently caress ON PUBLIc

Inescapable Duck posted:

I kind of want to play a game where the hero is carnie trailer trash, though then again we already had No More Heroes, where the protagonist is almost certainly a goon.

SplitSoul posted:

Context: https://twitter.com/spankyevans1/status/914968129570316288

Ariong posted:

Got a request. I remember earlier this year someone did one of those jokes where the punchline is a link that goes to the profile page of whatever account you’re logged into. So like, “Everybody knows that this idiot is the worst poster on the forums.” If I click the link it goes to my profile, if you click it you get yours.

Anyway I remember someone took the bait hard and ended up making a weird threat toward the person who posted the link. “Obviously you don’t know who you’re messing with, so how about you alologize and we forget this ever happened?” Something like that. It was amazing, never has someone been so self assured while faceplanting so hard.

Pick posted: