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infernal machines posted:see, the problem is they used to just pay the mangosteens right away and then the kind of flaky dipshits that write for SA would take them and gently caress off, probably bartering them for jenkem or box wine and horse tranquilizers. so now, the new plan is to withhold pay until they've written several articles and proved that they are a reliable source of humour. an old faithful of laughs. then they'll get paid
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# ¿ Feb 20, 2020 11:24 |
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# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:59 |
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There was a front page story about keeping ostriches on April Fool’s Day, 2003.
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# ¿ Feb 20, 2020 14:31 |
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Mr. Bad Guy posted:Ostriches are specifically listed under "not kosher" which for legal purposes is obviously "close enough" to apply to emus. The only paleognath mentioned in Leviticus is the unclean ostrich, so it would makes sense that the rest of the clade (emus, rheas, kiwis, cassowaries, and tinamous) are unclean as well. Platystemon has a new favorite as of 01:06 on Feb 21, 2020 |
# ¿ Feb 21, 2020 00:35 |
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Flavius Aetass posted:the five-head that launched a thousand drones Vincent Van Goatse posted:added up, there's a double digit headcount in that photo
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# ¿ Feb 24, 2020 02:42 |
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On the subject of Mad Mike Hughes:Azhais posted:Parachutes are hard, even Boeing can't get them right poisonpill posted:Not true. Boeing’s exiting executives all have fully functional golden ones.
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# ¿ Feb 25, 2020 00:47 |
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Elfface posted:I vote it gets changed to SpecificFerret WeightedFerret
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# ¿ Feb 25, 2020 22:06 |
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ChoiceErmine
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# ¿ Feb 26, 2020 11:11 |
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I wanted to use mongoose but they’re not closely related to ferrets. It’s convergent evolution. e: AutocraticOtter Platystemon has a new favorite as of 14:42 on Feb 26, 2020 |
# ¿ Feb 26, 2020 14:38 |
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BOOTY-ADE posted:Imagine five vaginas on the edge of a taint They call it “The Quincunx”.
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# ¿ Feb 27, 2020 00:39 |
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SATAN is not responding to hails and has squawked 7700.
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# ¿ Feb 27, 2020 03:07 |
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Rookie mistake. Poke a hole and the pee will go everywhere. The superior technique is to snip a corner.
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# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 07:34 |
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Great minds think alike.Platystemon posted:It’s only a cyberpunk dystopia if it’s from the Chiyoba ward of Tokyo.
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# ¿ Mar 3, 2020 07:49 |
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Shaggar posted:dash based devices can only be used if the interaction is simple. i.e. you cant text using your fingers on a dash mounted phone. Shaggar posted:lol. CB radios are explicitly exempted. Jonny 290 posted:it'd gently caress truckers jesus WEP posted:the term is gammons
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# ¿ Mar 7, 2020 12:26 |
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Ariong posted:We recommend all of our employees stock up on disinfectant and hand sanitizer. We would provide these supplies, but for some reason we seem to be having trouble finding any. We’re sure you’ll have more luck. Duckman2008 posted:Like all other strategies , Game Stop is probably going to shift to encouraging employees to buy as much used / preowned sanitizer as possible.
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# ¿ Mar 20, 2020 17:39 |
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Tei posted:We are living in the timeline where many laws has been influenced directly by Bono. Plank Walker posted:yeah a significant number of lawyers are pro Bono
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# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 04:51 |
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Joe Bogan posted:Can we update the thread title to avoid any further confusion? Funny Forums Quotes: garnish that age of majority gash with garnets and cash Goons in Platoons probates “gash” and PYF puts it in titles. I’m not judging. I just think it’s odd.
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# ¿ Apr 12, 2020 14:03 |
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Memento posted:
Vlex posted:
LifeSunDeath posted:The original is clearly one of these faces Mushika posted:Anime ruins everything. LifeSunDeath posted:What I'm saying is, that face is much older than anime FactsAreUseless posted:1000 years, but it looks a lot younger
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# ¿ Apr 16, 2020 07:45 |
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Royale™ with cheese
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# ¿ Apr 16, 2020 09:12 |
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Tias posted:It just seems really hard. Most women with desirable traits live way out theres or have incompatible religions. It’s less bad in context.
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# ¿ Apr 20, 2020 09:56 |
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I believe you mean “self thymer”.
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# ¿ Apr 20, 2020 14:27 |
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Cacafuego posted:Who took that photo? Herb.
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# ¿ Apr 20, 2020 15:05 |
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Pastry of the Year posted:I have zero idea what's going on here but you do you until someone yells about it Tolkien wrote some kinky poo poo and
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# ¿ Apr 23, 2020 00:01 |
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elise the great posted:First things first: we actually do know what elves called their dicks, because even the glorious JRRT couldn't keep his hands out of his pants. The poetic term (yes, elves seem to have engaged in erotic poetry) would be gwî, but for everyday usage gwib was the preferred term. Puntl is provided as the coarse, moderately transgressive term, and likely what you would be invited to suck if you went down on a male elf. Alas, due to the ban on the Noldorin language, we have no surviving slang for Fëanor's johnson. Link in the quote goes to that post in the goldmine. The whole thread is great.
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# ¿ Apr 23, 2020 00:05 |
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Inceltown posted:Things that land on your mask grow there. You breathe through them hard. Masks don’t have ACE2 receptors. SARS‐CoV‐2 can’t grow in anything but its mammalian hosts.
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# ¿ Apr 23, 2020 08:07 |
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Dabir posted:I don't get it dickbutt
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# ¿ Apr 23, 2020 08:27 |
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The announcement’s presence annoys me enough that I thought about adblocking it, but not enough that I actually did so.
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# ¿ Apr 24, 2020 15:21 |
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I want to short, but I remember these quotes. Kitfox88 posted:
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# ¿ May 1, 2020 11:07 |
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Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:You just did. Well, I’m off to get some alligatin’ done. These alligations are defamatory and unsubstantiated.
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 07:24 |
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inflatrix
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 08:15 |
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Moo the cow posted:"While his wife was on a shopping trip, the man spent the weekend with his mistress" lover, paramour, inamorato
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 08:36 |
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Kenning posted:It does, fool, rear end, halfwit, nincompoop, blockhead, dunce, dolt, ignoramus, cretin, imbecile, dullard, moron, simpleton, clod, dope, ninny, chump, dimwit, goon, dumbo, dummy, dum-dum, dumb-bell, loon, dork, jackass, bonehead, fathead, numbskull, dunderhead, chucklehead, knucklehead, muttonhead, pudding-head, thickhead, wooden-head, airhead, pinhead, lamebrain, pea-brain, birdbrain, zombie, jerk, nerd, dipstick, donkey, noodle, nit, nitwit, twit, numpty, clot, plonker, berk, prat, pillock, wally, git, wazzock, divvy, nerk, twerp, twonk, charlie, mug, muppet, nyaff, balloon, sumph, gowk, gobdaw, schmuck, bozo, boob, lamer, turkey, schlepper, chowderhead, dumbhead, goofball, goof, goofus, galoot, lummox, klutz, putz, schlemiel, sap, gink, cluck, clunk, ding-dong, dingbat, wiener, weeny, dip, simp, spud, coot, palooka, poop, squarehead, yo-yo, dingleberry, wing nut, drongo, dill, alec, galah, nong, bogan, poon, boofhead, mompara, knobhead, asshat, tomfool, noddy, clodpole, loggerhead, spoony, mooncalf.
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 10:07 |
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Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:Actually most of the problems with American English were caused by one guy who thought it should contain all the words used by Shakespeare so he carelessly imported and released them. It wasn’t a guy. It was actually a talking bird. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yhBaVInb3jI&t=111s
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 11:15 |
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drake_no: Pokémon break drake_yes: Pokémon Go pedal
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# ¿ May 4, 2020 14:35 |
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zoux posted:https://twitter.com/Grimezsz/status/1257836061520101377 Mr Luxury Yacht posted:I'd name my kid Avro Arrow, but just like it's namesake, thanks to terrible Conservative policies it'll probably never happen.
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# ¿ May 7, 2020 02:48 |
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Rigged Death Trap posted:Glad to see Denver make the olympics
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# ¿ May 9, 2020 07:30 |
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PHIZ KALIFA posted:the cali-girl "like" is a linguistic starling It’s beautiful and clever?
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# ¿ May 11, 2020 03:42 |
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It’s not like Shakespeare was above inventing names. Names first attested in the works of the bard include Olivia, Jessica, Miranda, and Imogen.
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# ¿ May 11, 2020 04:21 |
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“Imogen” was probably a misspelling, but everyone goes with Shakespeare’s version so it counts.
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# ¿ May 11, 2020 04:37 |
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dee eight posted:add the sketches plz Linking because it’s a cartoon of an exotic dancer: https://ianjq.tumblr.com/post/19027383185/gasps-oh-my-god-i-have-to-draw-you
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# ¿ May 11, 2020 21:05 |
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# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:59 |
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Unrealistic. Tracking updates skip a bunch of steps these days. You just get like “label printed” and and maybe “it’s in your town now”.
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# ¿ May 15, 2020 01:00 |