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joke_explainer


ihopeirememberthis posted:

Is SA still SJW central? Like, are normal people allowed to post in GBS?

what's wrong with SJWs? Are 'normal people' expected to dislike social justice?

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joke_explainer


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joke_explainer fucked around with this message at 20:26 on Feb 19, 2016

joke_explainer


joke_explainer



that's pretty amazing, thanks SIB.

joke_explainer


Luvcow posted:

"snausages in butter" is what I always think of. When I was a child my family would take whatever butter we could find and melt it in a big pot and then put a package of snausages brand dog treats in it to cook. It's really delicious on cold days.

Was your family really so impoverished that they ate dog treats as a snack? It seems odd that they would choose a premium dog treat brand like Snausages™ instead of just like alpo or something. Snausages™ are actually more expensive by ounce than like libby's vienna sausages. I'm sorry Luvcow.

joke_explainer


that boklava looks loving amazing.

joke_explainer


A4 Steak Sauce posted:

Howdy, Steak sauce here. This entire site is terrifying for a new member, and this and a whitelist request I made will probably be the only posts I make for the rest of this year.

I am grateful that there is at least one section of the forums where I do not need to fear speaking up for the time being. I'll just get back to lurking for now.

A4 steak sauce?? that's a forbidden formula!! all samples were destroyed! it was never meant to be escape the facility! *goes to alert the other steak sauce scientists the A4 has gone sapient*

joke_explainer


everyone's favorite bear has a high-resolution glamor shot on the front page:

http://www.somethingawful.com/news/university-chicago-trigger/

joke_explainer


Binge-watched most of Luke Cage. It's entertaining but nowhere near as good as Jessica Jones imo. Parts are really hokey. The fight scenes are totally in contrast to like, a carefully choreographed show like Daredevil, like, they're almost comedy, Luke slaps a dude on the head and he's just completely out. He's constantly just tossing people over his head behind him and stuff. The music is fantastic.

The character was born out of the blaxsploitation era of cinema and the show definitely has some thematic elements like that, though the show tries to stay away from any stereotypical portrayal that was so common in those movies. I feel like they do a pretty good job, but they are a little weird about coming right up to a social issue of some sort then walking away sideways really quickly before they take any kind of stance.

One line I just saw I couldn't stop laughing about. No spoilers, but at one point a bad guy's flunky walks up to him lording over a box.

The flunkie walks up and says, "So, what's in the box?"

The bad dude says "One of the seven deadly sins, my boy... which I plan to unleash on dear old Luke."

The flunkie says, stupidly, "Which one?"

And he says, of course, "Wrath."

This just cracked me up before he even finished the obvious cliche, like. I started imagining the other seven deadly sins that might be in that box.

  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Gluttony. I've got loads of Luke's favorite food in here. It's irresistible to him. He'll eat himself sick. Our victory will be glorious."
  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Lust. Luke is into some really weird porno. This case is stuffed with it. When he sees the contents of this case, he'll be paralyzed with lust."
  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Sloth. Got a snuggie for every day of the week in this bad boy, sized perfectly for Mr. Luke Cage. He'll be so comfy he won't even leave the house. You don't have to defeat what never comes to face you, my boy."
  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Envy. When Luke Cage sees my diamond-studded dental grill, he won't be able to contain his jealousy. He'll covet and seek that which I have relentlessly, to his own destruction."
  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Hubris. I've made a beautiful statue to Luke Cage, cast out of bronze, and I'm going to install it right in City Hall. The plaque will honor his achievements and his fellow man will honor him. Such praise will no doubt go to his head, leading him directly into my hands."
  • The flunkie says, "Which one?", and the bad dude says: "Greed. Why, I have Luke Cage's tax returns within this very box which reveal that he's not paid a dime of income tax since 1993. When this news hits the press, he's worse than dead: He wouldn't even be considered a viable political candidate. Total humiliation."

anyway, just cracked me up.

joke_explainer


deep dish peat moss posted:

The weirdest part about Luke Cage trying to touch on police violence was that the lady who had a rally about police violence in the show used it as a platform to say that cops need bigger guns so they can kill superheroes, too.

Yeah, that was a really strange turn. Complaints about police violence, profiling. Then the pitch? Bigger guns that they could kill Captain America with or w/e. Totally baffling.

joke_explainer


big black turnout posted:

is it really that surprising? superheroes seem pretty inherently fascist to me. "wouldn't it be great if instead of a justice system a vigilante just maimed/killed anyone they determined was 'bad'???" i wouldn't be surprised to find overlap between fans and the "maybe people would be killed less if they cooperated with the police" types (for multiple reasons)

Not surprising for the genre, but certainly surprising in context of the story with a BLM style rally about police profiling and racial violence. Like the crowd is cheering along as the politician is like 'these police are harassing our children in the streets!' and then she's like 'what we really need to do is arm the cops with super guns that kill even more effectively!' and they cheer.

joke_explainer


Zyla posted:

I feel like in the Marvel Universe, insurance must be impossible to get in any major city. Its a near certainty, property loss.

i always suspected wayne industries probably had an enormously profitable 'glass panes' division

joke_explainer


Piso Mojado posted:

batman is the DC universe, not marvel
:goonsay:

fuccckkkk

joke_explainer


alnilam posted:

You, 30, desiccated with age: hmm, i suppose i could name a few whines... the whines of my heirs as they ask for money, that is, ho ho ho *drops monocle into bowl of sad looking soup*

Me, 29, bounding with youthful energy: yeah i know a few cats who make wine, it's pretty good but they haven't gotten too commercial with it, it's cool

joke_explainer


its so cold!!

joke_explainer


voodoo doughnuts is a lot like grocery store doughnuts, like, if you have ever been to the southeast US and went to a bi-lo (or food lion), bi-lo (or food lion) sells doughnuts with an identical crumb, just voodoo puts weirder stuff on theirs.

blue star doughnuts up by legit great sandwich place Lardo at 13th SW / Burnside area is really good though (however they've taken a drop in quality since the first 3 months they were opened imo)

joke_explainer


Munchables posted:

The blue star at the airport just opened and a coworker and I tried it. It was alright, but pretty underwhelming. Sesame is mucho goodo.

I'm sorry they disappointed. Somebody who works there said they've cut back on a lot of the quality stuff for cheaper replacements lately, guess they're under some economic pressure.

joke_explainer


UPS is always better imo but more expensive. USPS is cheap, and you can schedule a pickup at your house if you don't want to take a bunch of poo poo to the post office for free. As long as you box it well it'll be fine in general.

joke_explainer


Mariana Horchata posted:

next time u eat cider donuts take a bite and then chew for like 2 seconds - and then take a sip of actual apple cider and it will just dissolve the remainder of the doughnut and merge with its deliciousness before u slam it down and then repeat to ur liking

you can actually eat the whole doughnut in a few seconds by just compressing it into a tiny dough ball, dunking it in cider for a second and then swallowing it, old food contest trick tho guaranteed stomach ache

joke_explainer


Looks like it is going to snow tomorrow.

joke_explainer


carrie fisher had a heart attack while landing on a plane and had to have CPR administered while the plane landed for 15 minutes and is now in critical condition

this sucks

gently caress 2016

joke_explainer


hey mrbadlymartin, i was looking at your sig, that text you have with the bolded / strikethrough characters. obviously the bold letters spell 'BYOB', but the strikethrough letters spell 'nitecrw'? Is it missing a strikes-through e, or did you intend 'nitecrw'?

joke_explainer


I remember the milk ape. His sacrifice was not in vain.

Congrats lmbo_calrissian!! I'm proud of you!!

and happy birthday AB

Also, duckie's ducks don't march out of order; they're just rearranging their formation in a strictly controlled drill

joke_explainer


Hugh Malone posted:

I was looking for dixieland jazz on tunein and I found a station from Russia called Radio Caprice Dixieland

It's weird, there's old dixiand interspersed with weird Russian folky stuff it's good

i wonder if I could hook that up to the radio station streaming stuff in euro truck simulator...

joke_explainer


i didn't even realize anything was wrong but I welcome all refugees and hope you find a supportive and entertaining posting home here

joke_explainer


TOOT BOOT posted:

I'm buying some chili tonight at the grocery store. I know canned chili is kinda scrub-tier but the one time I made it from scratch everyone loved it except me so I ended up giving it away.

what the heck?

what were your ingredients / process? what struck you as off about that? I'm sure we could get to the bottom of this and make a chili that would bring you deep peace and happiness

joke_explainer


you're a chili soul that goes off the beaten path, that can't be enticed by chili that others love... that's not a bad thing, it's a challenge... we can do it

joke_explainer


There is a deep ideological divide online that says a a grilled cheese + anything else other than cheese = a melt, not a grilled cheese. Of course we are all familiar with something like a tuna melt, but some people take this even further. I'm not one for semantics on it. A hot sandwich with melted cheese and browned bread is a great thing, no matter what you put inside.

I got a new phone today from work! It's one of those apple iPhones. My last upgrade was over 2 years ago, so I'm pretty happy about it. It's a good perk. Kind of a double edged perk, since it means you are always contactable, but its so worth it compared to the cost of buying your own phone or paying your monthly phone costs.

joke_explainer


MrWillsauce posted:

i got the flu it's no good. last night i decided to get drunk while i had the flu and that was a real bad idea

Having had the flu and been insanely bored and done that I can acknowledge it's like your body agrees with the flu and makes an alliance with it against your brain

joke_explainer


so if the rumors are true, other forums are organizing death squads, hunting down anyone who they can find identify through posts?? pretty disturbing if you ask me

joke_explainer


Manifisto posted:

opportunity too hard to pass up



very nice. Not regulation size tho

joke_explainer


Manifisto posted:

joke_explainer can be the card with all the bridge scorings on it

nice!!

joke_explainer


HotSoapyBeard posted:

Hi so I have made a handful of replies so I thought saying hello was overdue so hello.
An interesting thing about me is that I drive a boat and the other day we accidentally let off a 65 man auto-inflating life-raft inside a room about 8 foot wide and it was pushing the tables against the wall smashing everything up and about to burst the roof and my boss was yelling "BURST IT!!! BURST ITT!!! so I grabbed a knife and stabbed it and the blast of air blew me and the other skipper across the room, I thought he was going to have a heart attack.
Ok cool nice to meet you cheerio

Crazy! Glad nobody was injured. It would be tragic to be killed by a lifeboat.

joke_explainer


Manifisto posted:

is there a cocktail called a monkey bite? because it feels like there should be

There is.

1/2 oz. Irish Cream (Bailey's)
1/2 oz. Liqueur, banana (Creme de Banane)
1/2 oz. Amaretto (Disaronno)
1/2 oz. Kahlua
1/2 oz. Rum, banana
1/64 oz. phenazepam

joke_explainer


Welcome iospace!! Post a thread about any old thing and I look forward to reading it.

joke_explainer fucked around with this message at 06:09 on Apr 19, 2017

joke_explainer


iospace posted:

Will you also explain all my dumb jokes :cheeky:?

Happy to, assuming I can understand them. I'm guessing this is in itself a joke, based on my name.


iospace posted:

Maybe! Maybe I'm a space alien from the SPORTSBALL DIMENSION scouting out an invasion!

It's fun. Also sig test

we try to be welcoming to invading hordes

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joke_explainer


now that cda’s banned I can finally return! After ten thousand years I’m
free!!!

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