The First Presidential Debate: you've been fighting isis your whole adult life

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > The First Presidential Debate: you've been fighting isis your whole adult life

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logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

SUBMIT BINGO CARDS BY 8:00PM OR IT DOESN'T COUNT! Remember to read the rules before entering! :siren:

Welcome to the First Presidential Debate thread for the worst-written presidential election in recent memory. All posters, including certain hatless losers and hat-wearing Trumpians are welcome, for we are Stronger Together.

This debate is one of the most hyped and watched events of All Time. The thread will move quickly, so it is advisable to :justpost:

WHERE: Hofstra University, NY _{because the first choice couldn't afford to spend the $$$}
WHEN: 9PM - 10:30PM EST
HOW: This isn't your normal network-locked debate! Streaming will be plentiful, along with every single major channel broadcasting their own stream! You literally have no excuse to not watch it! Just loving watch it! gently caress!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=855Am6ovK7s

Vertical Lime posted:

twitter has the bloomberg stream live

https://twitter.com/i/live/778347749217406976

this is the one with the live fact-checking

quote this for every page because people will ask

quote:

ON TV: The debate will be carried by all three major broadcast networks � NBC, CBS and ABC. It can also be seen on PBS, CNN and Fox News.

ON YOUR COMPUTER: Most news websites will be carrying a live-stream. We�re partial to nytimes.com.

ON YOUR PHONE: If you decide for some reason not to watch on The New York Times mobile app, you can find the debate on CNNgo and the Fox News app.

ON SOCIAL MEDIA: Twitter will live-stream the Bloomberg Media broadcast, including its pre- and post-debate shows. Facebook Live will carry ABC�s live-stream, and also various news networks� live broadcasts. YouTube will have live-streams from many organizations, including PBS, The Washington Post and Telemundo.

AT A LOCAL BAR: Yes, along with the hype and pomp comes debate-watching extravaganzas like you might find for the Super Bowl. Watering holes around the country will be showing the debates, but if you�re in a city that has a team in the baseball playoff hunt (like New York, Baltimore, Boston, Houston, Washington, Chicago, Detroit, Seattle, St. Louis, Los Angeles or San Francisco) or in Atlanta or New Orleans, whose teams face off in Monday Night Football (much to the chagrin of Mr. Trump), getting the volume turned up on the debate might be difficult.

WHO:

Lester Holt, NBC Nightly News _{_{RIP brian williams}}

TODAY'S CONTESTANTS ARE:

DONALD TRUMP (16/0/0)
A newcomer to the political stage, possible child rapist Donald Trump has steamrolled his competition faster than he steamrolled homes in Atlantic City to build his luxurious casinos. With a near-superhuman ability to dodge questions and bend reality, he certainly presents more than enough challenge for his rivals. Bent knees, obnoxious hats, and lovely posters follow wherever he goes. Will he be able to word salad around his opponent, or will he be found dead from an apparent suicide?

HILLARY CLINTON (???/1/0)
There has been no Drudge article, no shitpost, and no heavily sexist tweet in the last twenty years that hasn't been aimed at actual murderer Hillary Clinton. The wife of Donald Trump's best friend, Hillary Clinton has dominated the political scene for the last 10+ years by deftly eliminating all threats to her ascendancy. Will she be able to covertly poison Trump during the debate? Or will she be another victim to the unstoppable Trump Train?

GET hosed UP AND WASTED WITH US

Want an excuse to drink? Are you afraid that Donald will Destroy America / Hillary will usher in a thousand years of Status Quo Darkness? Whatever that may be, drink with us using the Official C-SPAM Drinking Game (Credit to The Ninth Layer for making this up!)

The Ninth Layer posted:

This is the drinking game I'll be playing tomorrow. I will probably be playing with a once per question clause to keep it manageable.

Take 1 drink when either candidate or the moderator says any of the following:
Email(s)
Job(s)
Black Lives Matter
Obama
Foundation (Clinton or Trump)
"Believe me"
Mexico/Mexicans
Bill Clinton
Vladimir Putin
Terror/Terrorists
Lie / Lying / Liar

Take 2 drinks when either candidate or the moderator says any of the following:
Benghazi
Bernie Sanders
The Wall
9/11
Radical Islamic Terrorism
Crooked
Bigly / Big League
Alt-Right

Finish your drink when either candidate or the moderator says any of the following (one time only):
All Lives Matter
Monica Lewinsky
Bitch / oval office / Other gendered insult

And also Perfectly Safe's graphic version of the above: http://i.imgur.com/SNj4LX9.png

BINGO SUBMISSIONS ARE CLOSED AS OF 8 PM :siren:

Are you highly competitive and want free poo poo, which you will promptly lose when you lose your toxx?
Generate a Bingo Card and play C-SPAM bingo with us! Complete your card first, and there will be a prize! It will likely disappoint you, just like Jeb!

Praise to the Baloogan to developing the backend poo poo for this contest and to Lastgirl for the idea of bingo and for helping out with the details!!!!

Bingo Directions:
1. Go to the link and type in your username. (scroll down if you don�t see it)
2. A card and a unique URL will be generated in your name. This is your card now! You can�t get a new card so deal with it!
3. Post a link to the card (and a screenshot of the card itself, please!) in a post before the designated debate start time.
4. When you complete the card (with a horizontal, diagonal, or vertical line through the center), post BINGO in the thread and we will sort poo poo out and contact you, somehow. Keep an eye out for a PM, or if you�re not a plat member watch out for a post from us.

Bingo Rules:
1. You must post the link / screenshot before the debate starts, or you are disqualified.
2. You cannot edit the aforementioned post AT ALL. If you edit it, even to fix a typo, you are disqualified and will be punished with a big fat probation! If you want to fix something, post again before time is over.
3. You also cannot edit your BINGO! post. If you do, you will be disqualified as well and also slapped with a big fat probation!
4. You can play the drinking game and bingo at the same time, if you want! But they are separate activities!!
5. If the forums crash, it is your responsibility to keep track of your bingo card. If you complete the card while we are still down, then you need to post bingo as soon as it comes back up.
6. We will slap whomever falsely calls BINGO with a probation as well!!!

logikv9 has issued a correction as of 01:35 on Sep 27, 2016

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 06:39

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 16, 2024 08:38

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

~~Closed until the morning! Sorry Nite Crew!~~

logikv9 has issued a correction as of 16:35 on Sep 26, 2016

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 06:40

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Remember that you have to post your bingo card link + screenshot in this thread for it to count!

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 16:36

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

WAR DOGS OF SOCHI posted:

I was contributing a lot of card spaces throughout the evening, so I was probably one of the first to generate my own assigned Bingo card. I took a screenshot of the card, but it doesn't have the link because I didn't know I needed it at the time (this thread hadn't gone up yet).

luckily the amazing baloogan made the URLs easy to parse

http://bingo.baloogan.com/game.php?Name=war+dogs+of+sochi

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 16:45

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

WAR DOGS OF SOCHI posted:

Just to be clear: is a "bingo" is a full card (all spaces full) or a single row/column?

(because the odds of "hillary blasts trump with pepper spray" are very slim)

horizontal, vertical, or diagonal line across the center

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 17:11

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

90 min debate, divided in 6 segments

no audience participation

clinton goes first

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 18:02

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Lastgirl posted:

tough poo poo

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 22:21

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

donald getting destroyed in our poll! what does bill mitchell have to say about that??

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 22:28

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

mike12345 posted:

Is boosted still probated? Can he be unprobated or restricted to posting in this thread?

1. boosted is not currently probated
2. he can post in this thread if he wants to, unimpeded

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 22:30

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Chokes McGee posted:

Can we get some voter fraud in here to make this happen, tia

we have some real tough guys, really tough guys, watching the ballot box here :smugdon:

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 22:39

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Venom Snake posted:

MARK CUBAN AND JEB ARE HERE

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 22:41

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

i'm saving myself for when the debate starts :getin:

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:19

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Robert Morrow hit his single-issue anime voter ceiling - Shook Nate

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:22

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Concerned Citizen posted:

https://twitter.com/kenvogel/status/780532591992594432

Hofstra's ranking on US News & World Report just dropped to dead last!

wasn't this considered illegal when hotels did it?

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:31

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Trabisnikof posted:

Nah the hotels used actual jammers. That's just a detector and presumably everyone's tickets say "don't byowifi"

ohh. hofstra wants to make their money back with these wifi accounts, ugh

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:44

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Venom Snake posted:

http://i.imgur.com/Smwwxzg.jpg

yell "wear the hat, boosted" during the debate

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:48

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Shook Nate has Ed Balls at 15% on his forecast, but at 60% on his polls-plus. Sad!

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:49

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

i have plenty of beer but not enough food. considering ordering a pizza :ohdear:

# ¿ Sep 26, 2016 23:58

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Karl Sharks posted:

do we need to post a screenshot of our bingo card in the thread, or can we say bingo and then post it? i'm doing it old school with a piece of paper, but yeah

you mean posting your completed card? you can call bingo and then post your card, but we will check to make sure you didn't call it prematurely so that you would have the upper hand time-wise!

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:05

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

yeah just post BINGO first but please quickly post your card afterwards.

i'm going to scour the CSPAN debate transcript (and the timestamps within) to certify winners with the other IKs after the fact.

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:06

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

all bingo rules are in the OP!!

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:40

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Chokes McGee posted:

who the gently caress are these idiots who didn't vote ed balls

ed balls as hard as possible, at all times

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:47

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

one day lastgirl they will implement push notifications for PMs and i won't be an hour late to respond to you every time

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:48

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Al! posted:

The iphone app has a little • when you have a new pm

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:51

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

i'm also desktop posting so i'm not paying attention to anything that could give me a notification anyway

i guess that's my fault

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:51

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Goons are illiterate, it turns out.

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 00:56

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

I can't wait for Hillary Clinton to stare directly at the camera, and say "nite crew go home" because you can't fill in your bingo square

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:02

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

where the gently caress is my pizza

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:06

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Wulfolme posted:

Anime tits still holding a narrow lead

maybe he would have done better if i didn't crop so much of that picture out

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:06

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

JosefStalinator posted:

Postin' my card:

http://bingo.baloogan.com/game.php?Name=JosefStalinator

Is pantsuits a free card if Hillary is wearing one?

you were too late, friend

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:11

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Helsing posted:

Good to see the thread's already hitting warp speed.

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:14

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

what is this weird graves ad on CNN

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:13

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Karl Sharks posted:

whats this from

star trek beyond

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:17

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Thread poll already has more than twice the votes than the primary threads ever did.

He told you he would drive big ratings :smugdon:

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:19

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

JosefStalinator posted:

gently caress everyone who did not vote for Robert Morrow.

ED BALLS

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:23

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

morrow/

2016

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:28

logikv9: Mar 5, 2009; Ham Wrangler

Grondoth posted:

Aki Nijou (二条秋 rōmaji:Nijou Aki) is the school nurse. She is also the staff-advisor of Maken-ki. She was in the maken-ki of the school before it became an all girl's school. She has an absurdly humongous bosom, the largest bust of the cast, which perversely attracts all male students's attention and the envy of girls around her. Despite this, Aki is unexpectedly still a virgin even with her veteran figure.

Aki is one of the benevolent, gentle figures and she is very kind with all the students and all the school staff. She is shown to be a very naively immodest person (i.e. a clothing kultz) when situations arise. A running gag of this personality quirk of hers is the fact that she is constantly shown revealing some part of her body - most commonly her panties - unintentionally.

Despite her appearance Aki has never had a relationship and is still a virgin, and is in no hurry to change that fact, as seen in season 2 episode 5 OVA where she tried to pass of Takeru as her boyfriend to avoid her mother setting her up. She does want a relationship but would like to sort the matter for herself. When Minori reveals her virginity to Takeru and Kengo, she is mortified, and begs the boys to keep it to themselves.

Trivia
Aki's chest is the most massive of all female characters.
Along with Minori, Aki is one of Takeru's mentor who trained him to unleash his Maken within during the student training camp.

my god

# ¿ Sep 27, 2016 01:33