shut up blegum posted:

My first guess here is she's a dancer or something? I don't know why though.

quote:

I have been friends with “Sam” since we were both in primary school. Over the years friends have come and gone but we’ve generally always stayed close, always making time to catch up even when we lived in different parts of the country for university. We’ve helped each other through some tough times and he’s honestly like a brother to me and I’ve always thought he felt the same way.

We’ve lived in the same city since finishing Uni and he’s a part of my friend group, although he also has a group of friends he goes to football matches with who I’ve only met a few times. A few years ago Sam introduced me to his cousin “Gareth” at a party Sam was hosting and we hit it off straight away. Sam and Gareth are friendly but not that close due to their age difference, I’ve encouraged them to hang out more but neither really kept it up beyond family engagements and when we all hang together. A year ago Gareth proposed to me, and we’ve set our wedding for February.

Now here’s the problem, initially Sam told us that he would be attending, which was never in doubt, we’re having our wedding on a Saturday in the city we live in and most of his family are coming. However a week ago he called to tell me that he had got a ticket for an away football game on that day and that it was an important game considering that his team are currently among the favourites to win the league and going up against a key title rival in the match. He said that his friend had gone through a lot of trouble to get the ticket for him and that he felt like it would be rude for him not to attend.

I’m beyond furious with him now, and I don’t know if I can forgive him for this. I could understand possibly if he had already booked the tickets or if he had a different kind of important engagement but the fact that he just blew me off for a league football game is insulting. Should I try to get his family to persuade him to change his mind or just cut him out of my life?

TL;DR Best friend cancelled on my wedding to go to a football match, how should I handle it?

quote:

So my monster-in-law [50sF] and I [23F] haven't ever really gotten along in the last 5 years. My husband and I just got married a few months ago and now it's time to send out thank you cards. I have no idea how to thank such a horrible woman. I tend to blab, so I'm apologizing in advance. New account since my husband knows my main one.

To give background on the wedding planning... MIL wouldn't get off of my back about going wedding dress shopping, but this was a thing I only wanted to share with my mom and no one else. So we went shopping on days that we knew MIL worked (I know.. Bad start to the wedding planning, but after the years of dealing with this woman, even my mom didn't want her around). So eventually we picked out a dress and she NEEDED to know what it looked like. I sent her pictures of all the dresses that I tried on, but didn't like. My dress was a secret to everyone until they saw me in it on our wedding day, so this wasn't just treatment towards her. She basically harassed me and eventually dropped the situation.

Next, with the wedding 9 months away, she begged me to let her bake the cake. First of all, she doesn't cook. Ever. She eats food out of the frozen foods isle just to have something she can stick in the oven and be on her way. Plus she hasn't cleaned her house in almost 30 years. Her form of cleaning is "opening all the doors in the house and letting the air blow the dust away." Her kitchen is full of flies and expired foods.. So me being the neat-freak that I am, this wasn't going to happen. Plus our venue was providing a free cake any style we chose. I let my husband handle this argument so I wouldn't get on her bad side. He suggested cupcakes since we were already getting a cake to which she responded "cupcakes are for kid's birthday parties" and was extremely insulted that he would offer such an idea!

Since day 1, she was asking to make the centerpieces for all of our tables. I seriously considered this one at first until she decided she wanted to put candles in a bowl with some confetti and be done with it. Now I'm in no way, shape, or form a rich girl, but my husband and I were planning a cinderella-ish fairytale wedding. We booked a castle and were planning a black tie event, live band, etc. I tried to tell her as politely as possible that my mom and I were shopping and stumbled upon something really cute. We were still working out the details. When we figured out what we were doing, we asked her to help us make them.. She was overly ecstatic and rushed over every chance she got until my mom insulted her... Buckle your seatbelts for this one! MIL started yelling at my mom one morning because my mom called my husband by his shortened version of his name. Since the day I met him, I've always called him, let's say, "Ben." That's how he introduced himself to my mom and all of my friends. Well she flipped out in a screaming match that his name is "Benjamin," "he can't be called Ben because that's his grandfather's name. He will always be a BENJAMIN!" My mom tried to politely tell her that he was introduced as Ben and will always be a Ben to her because that's what he chose to be called. Next thing you know, she storms out of the house, refuses to come back, and now we're stuck doing the centerpieces without her. (Later, she took all the credit for them and told everyone that they were free to take after the wedding was over. She took 4 for herself.)

Bridal shower - my husband and I had registries at two different places. We discussed everything that we wanted in our house and chose it based off of our style. Normal. MIL kept arguing with my husband about getting the toaster oven that she has in her house. That's all fine and dandy, but when he and I discussed it (we actually had a debate over it since I've never owned a toaster oven before), we decided on a smaller style because at the time, we didn't have a house and didn't know how much counter space we would have. She flipped out and refused to help my mom plan the bridal shower just because of that. So what does she do? She buys the cheapest present on the list and says it was the only thing left on the registry (not true). I don't care what she buys, I would have actually preferred her to not bring anything. This one didn't bother me as much as it bothered my husband. He told me that she bought over $400 worth of crystal for his cousin's wedding and didn't buy anything for her son (since the bridal shower is presents for both of us, not just me). And on top of that, she forced grandma to buy us the big toaster oven.

Rehearsal. MIL walks in pissed off and refuses to put a smile on. Our priest has never met her, so he asks who she is and then says "oh! Congratulations on your new, almost daughter-in-law!" To which she responds with a very loud huff and turning her head. The priest brushes it off and continues talking very sweetly to her cold shoulder and can't get a response out of her. So he drops it and walks away. Rehearsal finishes and she comes up to my husband and I, grabs his arm, drags him out the door, and takes him for a walk. She left us all standing outside waiting to drive together to the dinner for about a half an hour. Now it's really pressing on time, so I ask the best man to go find him and bring him back. This was the only time that I broke down crying in front of everyone from all the stress she caused. When she came back, she had a smug look on her face.

Rehearsal dinner. We booked a private room in a restaurant and had all the seating arranged so we could sit next to each other with no arguments. MIL gets there first because FIL dropped her and grandma out front while we all found parking next to each other. She rearranges to tables so that way she could sit in a corner and not be apart of the party then proceeds to tell my brother-in-law what a rotten witch I am.. Nice.

Wedding ceremony. I didn't pay any attention to her whatsoever. My eyes were focused on my husband and not screwing up the 45 minute ceremony. Afterwards, we did the line where everyone says congratulations to you before getting in the cars to go to the dinner. She was one of the last people to walk by and instantly gives my husband a hug. That's understandable. He should get the biggest hug from her. Then she proceeds to walk out the door. My husband grabs her arm, and forces her to hug me. I brush it off and say how thankful I am for everything she did (starting the centerpieces? Woooo!) thinking that will get her to cheer up a bit. She didn't even try to make the hug look real, and gave me a pissed face as she walked out the door. Real smooth.

Wedding. MIL only danced with my husband for the mother-son dance and every time she saw me watching, she just turned her head. He said she kept asking if she'll ever see him again to which he responded "it depends how tonight goes." Obviously that didn't change her mind about how she wanted to treat the both of us. MIL loves to dance. She's awful at it, but it makes her happy. I mentioned it to my husband and he turned to me and flat out said "she made her decision." So we ignored her for the rest of the night and had our fun time.

Now we keep hearing stories from our guests saying all the rude things she did to each and every one of them. We got our photos back and don't have a single smiling one of her and FIL caught off guard. Even the posed ones. Our photographer tried to hard to make her smile and she wouldn't even budge.

So after all my blabbing, my question is: how do I go about writing a sincere thank you. The rest of my husband's family is getting a very sweet and personalized message. I'm honestly debating on sending her the photo and being done with it. I'm one of those people that has to be honest in order to write something and there is nothing to thank her for. "Thank you for being a b****. Our wedding was so memorable with you around." Haha

TL;DR - My monster-in-law was so rude throughout the wedding process that I can't think of a nice way to say thank you in the card.

Rondette posted:

I was pretty upset but she was a cranky old lady who never really seemed to warm to me in any meaningful way so I just tried my best to brush it off. Turns out she was on to something anyway as the marriage barely lasted 2 years.

Rondette posted:

Eh, I've moved on and am in a much better relationship now (with a kid on the way too in about 3 weeks woo) so yeah it is funny to me now too. It pretty much sums up what my relationship with her was like TBH.

Bonzo posted:

Prep the heffer
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/amorous-trio-who-sleep-together-9029654?ICID=ref_fark

DOMDOM posted:

Me [21 F] writing her future husband [?? M] till I find him

quote:

My girlfriend and I have been together for over 2 years.

In August we started talking about more serious topics that had to do with our relationship.

One topic that came up was how she doesn't like me looking at porn, which I've agreed to not watch.She's gone to say how she feels porn is evil and that if I were to watch it then she doesn't think the relationship would work out. Hinting at breaking up if I were to continue.

Then she also strongly discouraged that I masturbate at all, and saying that if I were to masturbate then she would feel disrespected.

Our relationship is not sexual at all. At the most we make out. She is fairly religious and wants to wait until marriage before having sex.

Before our serious conversation in August I usually watched porn and masturbated about every night or every other night for a few years. I was taught that it is okay and healthy to masturbate. I told her about my masturbation habits a little after we started dating but she didn't talk about it until August.

Around mid September I broke the agreement we made with myself watching and masturbating to porn for about a week... I felt sexually frustrated, tense, and stressed... I felt like I couldn't tell her about until I told her about it two weeks ago to where she was heart broken yet she wanted to try one more time.

Now I've not watched porn since and I haven't masturbated. The last few days I've felt very depressed and freezing up constantly whenever an urge would come by.

I'm just not sure what to do. I feel like I should at least be able to masturbate yet she thinks otherwise. I feel terrible for breaking her heart with looking at porn in September... At the same time I just feel like not doing anything affects me a lot. We still have feelings for each other. Should I just stop masturbating and deal with it?

tl;dr: Girlfriend and I agreed that I won't watch porn. Said she rather I don't masturbate at all because she would feel disrespected since we're not a sexually active couple (She wants to wait for marriage). I feel very depressed and frustrated a lot of the time with not masturbating. What should I do?

quote:

My friend has always raved about this business and has recommended it several times. I tried it out yesterday. The entire time I was there, the employees spoke (in another language) about "map girl" - basically saying mean things about her appearance and personality. When a third employee came in, the first two told her it was a bad day, they had already seen "map girl" first thing, etc.

When I told my friend that I had tried them out, she said it was too bad she didn't see me, because she had been to an 8AM appointment but must have left before I arrived. That's when I realized that she was "map girl" - she has a map tattoo.

I am sure it was her they were talking about. They do 45 minute appointments and only had one person working (the other person was the receptionist) when I went in. So they probably didn't have any other customers, and the fact that they called her "map girl" pretty much seals the deal.

I feel awful about this because my friend has been going to this place weekly for 5+ years and has always recommended them highly. I want to tell her, but at the same time, there's nothing she can do about their words. It might hurt her more than it would help her.

Should I tell her, or not?

tl;dr: My friend recommended a business to me that she loves. I went there and they said bad things about her. Should I tell her?

quote:

[–]hellogo55 11 points 58 minutes ago

Is this business a salon of some kind? The employees always talk poo poo about the customers. Honestly, think about their work environment and culture (based on the different language). It's kind of how they get through the day. As long as they provide your friend with good service, I would just let it lie.

[–]cantunderstandinstr[S] 3 points 44 minutes ago

Similar. They call it "physical therapy massage." My friend goes there because she is overweight and has a lot of joint and back pain, and that's part of what they talked about - like "she wouldn't need to come here if she wasn't so fat" etc.

Menstrual Show posted:

This is a Seinfeld episode.

Jack Trades posted:

Aaargh! Come oon.
What's with all these women being intimidated to hell and back by porn and monkey spanking?

Xaris posted:

this guy is really dumb

Xaris posted:

*to the tune of tegan and sara*
everyone is awful when you're posting on reddit


(and also SA)

please knock Mom! posted:

Did someone post the one where some wiccan idiot sacrificed someone's pet

Meridian posted:

What.

Are you serious?

DOMDOM posted:

Lady with the moron straight edge boyfriend who hid her meds posted an update. She brought up how she thought it was wrong of him and he disagreed and broke up with her.

WampaLord posted:

The top rated suggestion is to show up at his family's dinner and all over everything and then go "Believe me now?"

I'm in favor of it.

quote:

I'm a uni student and a frequent casual babysitter. I do it ad hoc, I'm not with an agency or anything, I get new clients through word of mouth. I've babysat for a couple of years and I love being able to meet and play with kids.

Six months ago, my most regular client recommended me to a good friend of hers. I received a text from this lady, Jenny, asking if I could babysit her two kids. I said sure.

The whole evening was an absolute nightmare. I just had no control over the older brother. He threw screaming tantrums, punched me, kicked me, kept trying to pile up furniture and climb across cabinets and stovetops to get candy, just point blank refused to listen to me. Took two hours to get him to bed. Didn't care when I tried to be stern, threaten to tell his parents, etc. I couldn't deal with holding him off and also making sure the younger sister wasn't getting herself into any trouble. I thought I was great with children, but maybe I've just had super obedient kids this whole time??

When Jenny came home, she asked how the evening went, and I panicked. I just said there had been some trouble getting them to listen to me and get to bed, and left it at that. I now regret not being more honest at the time. I thought it would be better to just keep saying I wasn't able to babysit every time she texted me, and fade out, but it's been 6 months and she keeps asking. I've probably declined her about 10 times since. I feel awful because she's evidently hoping every time that I can make it, when I'm never going to say yes. I don't want to be honest because I don't want to hurt her feelings, especially so long after the fact. I don't want to say I no longer babysit because of the issue of Jenny's friend, the original client, who I still babysit for very frequently and more than willingly. If that gets back to Jenny, she might be wondering why I'll babysit one and not the other.

I know Thomas isn't the worst kid in the world. Maybe Thomas just hasn't warmed up to me. But I just don't want to sit for this client any more. It's not worth it and I don't need the job. How do I communicate this to Jenny in a nice way? Or should I just continue to do what I'm doing?

tl;dr: I babysat a spoilt child once in April and never again. Is there a way I can express this to the mother in a way that won't hurt her feelings, or should I just make up excuses every time she texts me?

Bonzo posted:

I hope this is fake.

Dial-a-Dog posted:

Me [28 F] with my roomate [25 M] fingered my vinyl records while having hot sex with his boyfriend

Gaunab posted:

Welcome to the republican party

quote:

I met my girlfriend in school and we are now in our last year before graduation (same class). A few weeks ago she "came out" to me, she identifies as polyamorous. Apparently she has been in love with a couple of guys during our relationship, but she broke the contact with them since she did not want to lose me. Just to make it clear, she never did anything with them, she feels very strongly about cheaters.

A week after that I found out that she was in love with a guy in our class as well and that hurt a lot more. They are good friends and she says that if she can´t be with him, she at least wants to remain friends. She still choses me even though it hurts her.

I´m a very monogamous guy. I´ve been clear from the start that I wanted something that could last a lifetime. Now I know that we won´t be together after graduation. I had been dreaming of moving in together and building a life together but now I feel a bit used. Used and disgusted. How can someone call it love if they can´t be satisfied with it?

The perfect relationship for her would be multiple guys she could jump between whenever she felt like it. I just want to puke when I think about it. I could never just sit around hoping that she would chose me for the night when I want to spend every day of my life with her.

As I read this I realize that she might sound heartless, but she is very sorry for all of this. If she thought that she could live her life with one guy that guy would be me, she says that she truly loves me and I believe her even though I can´t understand her.

I had a hard time writing this and I´m not sure what I want out of it. Do you guys have any comforting words? Anyone with experience of polygamy?

tl;dr: My girlfriend is polyamorous, she wants to have multiple relationships at once and I can´t stand the thought of it.

quote:

My ex husband gave our son (7) his old phone to play games on. I was trying to find a way to block internet access on it when I discovered he hadn't removed his google account from the phone. I have been looking through his search history and I'm very concerned.

He has searched for: best way to poison someone, how to make someone sick, best home remedies to kill someone undetected, best way to poison with antifreeze, and how to secretly poison someone. He has visited the pages: thirteen ways to poison someone, is there a poison that would kill someone but leave no trace at autopsy, 101 ways to poison your enemy, 10 common household items that could kill you, 10 poisons used to kill people, 16 steps to kill someone and not get caught.

Some searches are from six months ago, some from a few weeks ago, and some from this past weekend.

He is an alcoholic and has some undiagnosed mental illness. He was abusive when we were together and since I left I am the devil to him. He also has a live in girlfriend that he fights with a lot and is abusive to now. I can't think of anyone else he hates.

Should I be reporting this to someone? I feel if I did it would be brushed off because it's not illegal to search for information on crimes. I don't think his girlfriend would believe me and would tell him what I said. And what if it's me he's after? Or what if it's everyone including our kids? Or it's totally possible he just wants to poison himself and have no one know it was suicide. He has tried to kill himself before at least 5 times that I know of and last time would have been successful if I hadn't found him.

TL;DR I snooped through my ex husbands search history and I think he is planning murder. Do I tell someone?

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I like how the only person to have called the police amidst all these murder schemes and child molestation is the dude whose brother peed on his bed.

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Long as gently caress but uhh, some goon might wanna be nicer to their dad, he works hard:

loquacius posted:

uh

can someone explain to me how a 40-year-old woman can have multiple sisters who are so underage they can be described by a 23-year-old as "little girls"

like, even if she had a Mormon teen mom who birthed her at 15, if you waited an additional 30 years for the time-frame to match up, mom would be 45 by then

Bonzo posted:

From /r/personalfinance

I am 17 years old: my mother has 5 credit cards under my name and uses my name/SSN for her bills. How will this affect my future? What can I currently do as a minor?

gentle pete posted:

Gaunab posted:

I'm still confused why she kept the baby.

lazorexplosion posted:

Pregnancy lady has it together and isn't taking his poo poo, so it's not really lol material and I just feel bad for her. But wow how dumb do you have to be to go 'well this guy is cheating on his pregnant current wife I sure would like to be married to this person that is a good decision about marriage'.

Gaunab posted:

loquacius posted:

dealbreaker imo

quote:

We’ve been dating exclusively for about two months now, and we met online through a dating website, so outside of what he presented to me I didn’t know anything else about him. He approached me first, and he was very polite and respectful. This was what got me interested enough to meet him in the first place. When he met up he almost seemed a little nervous which I found it to be endearing due to the fact that he doesn’t come off as the sort of person to be shy or hesitant in any regard. He seemed more confident, into sports and fitness and taking care of himself.

I ended up taking the lead in regards to physical romance and he was never pushy or made me feel uncomfortable. Overall he seems very sweet and we spend most of our time cuddling and watching movies and getting to know one another. At first he said he was just looking for something casual but as time goes by it almost seems like he’s the one who’s rushing things. From the start he said he wasn’t going to be seeing anyone else and I appreciated this as I personally am only involved with one person at a time.

Very recently though on separate occasions I encountered two women who work with him as our jobs are close by to each other. They found out that I was dating him and gave me a very shocking version of who he is.

Apparently he’s a complete creep. He’s attempted to sleep with every girl who works there, and he is constantly making comments about either the women who work there, or women in general. He’s crass and vulgar and always seems to be talking about sex or how hot some girl is. He actually makes a lot of women uncomfortable as a result of his behavior and personality. He had become obsessed with at least one or more of the women, constantly texting them, asking to meet up until they blocked his number.

I asked him about this and he told me that it wasn’t true, and that it was just a bunch of rumors, but I’m not sure that I believe him. They were so set in what they were telling me, and seemed genuinely concerned that I was involved with him. And it was two different times that this happened. Once I could let go, but not more.

He told me that he never tried sleeping with anyone, was never inappropriate, and has never pursued anyone that he works with. I don’t know what to think. If he’s lying about this, then he’s probably going to lie about everything else too. I want to trust him, but I don’t know that I can.

TL;DR: New boyfriend is apparently a creep and I don’t know who to believe.

Erethizon_dorsatum posted:

Did she delete it? I can't find it. I wanted to see the dog pile of replies telling her off.

Coucho Marx posted:

This was three pages ago, but I'm reading these out to my partner while she does other things, and she initially misheard this as "My [30F] new boyfriend [35M] is apparently the local Greek."

Cue great mental images of the boyfriend hastily pulling a blond wig over his black, curly hair when she gets home; her catching fleeting glimpses of him scarfing down dolmades; and him ducking down under his table when she walks past the town's Greek restaurant.

"What's your name?"

"George Papado-Jones. George Jones." *stuffs tzatziki and pita bread in a drawer*

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

Boyfriend's weird fetish is ruining us, help!

quote:

I mean I as prom queen for freggin' sake.

First response:

Ride The Gravitron posted:

"You make me feel like my tail swipe could level Tokyo."

loquacius posted:

square daddy-os don't know my jazz cigarette is filled with wacky tobacky