/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I'm going to pwn you if you argue about nonsense in this thread.

# ¿ Sep 28, 2016 18:13

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 11:33

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Jeffnote: my hero

So we've been with eachother for 6 years. Our sex life is just as good as when it started, I just wanted to try out some kinkier stuff so I suggested roleplaying. Kevin (husband) was somewhat open to the idea, but also thought it was a bit ridiculous. This is something I've always wanted to try, sort of like a fetish. So we got a few costumes, a Cop outfit and a Spy trenchcoat for him, and a nurse and cheerleader outfit for me. All of our roleplaying revolves around one person being in character, and the other interacting with them.

But he takes his roles as a joke! He goes intentionally extreme with the roles. I know he thinks it's a bit ridiculous, and I know he has more fun when he does this, but I want a real roleplay!

For example, when he dressed up as the Cop, he was supposed to do a stop and frisk, arrest me, etc, but in a sexy way. But instead, he kicks open the door, screams "HANDS UP THIS IS A RAID" and basically tackles me to the bed (this is OKAY it's NOT ABUSE we have rough dom/sub sex all the time), handcuffs me, literally reads me my Miranda Rights, leaves me there and rummages through the drawers throwing stuff everywhere, pulls out a little baggy of weed and goes apeshit like a cop might. I play a long, try to get him to 'let me go' if I can do sexual favours for him. Then we have some rough sex with handcuffs and everything. The actual sex was good but he kept speaking into his fake radio calling for backup, when I was on top he would shout OFFICER DOWN OFFICER DOWN.

With the Spy outfit he would come in and check me for wires and do the whole Pink Panther thing where he says "It is lovely weather we are having" while sneaking to the drapes and then beating the drapes up. I was envisioning a more James Bond-eqsue seduction.

Like, I like the sex, it's good, but I wanted a more porn-like experience. And it was kinda funny but not what I thought. And I KNOW that he thinks roleplay is ridiculous, and that he is trying to have fun with it but I feel like he doesn't know what I want. And I don't hate him for it, he's a big fuckin goofball in or out of our roles, but I want to have MY experience. How can I tell him this?

# ¿ Sep 29, 2016 19:37

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

She sounds pretty understanding, if they stay together it will be a thing to tease him for 6 months from now.

# ¿ Oct 1, 2016 18:06

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

please don't doxx me, danny and I are in love

# ¿ Oct 3, 2016 15:21

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

his widdle texty texts make my poonie woonie dry up

# ¿ Oct 3, 2016 15:58

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

goddammit post the diary mom link you jerks!

I think we probably shouldn't post links in this thread - lets stick to reading the weird stories.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2016 18:00

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I'll try to keep it succinct but a few of the background details matter. I'll call my husband Max (M26) and my BIL Scott.

Jesus christ I never thought I'd be asking the internet for help with a BIL who keeps drinking my breast milk... Hold on guys, here goes

When I was 14, like so many girls my age I thought it was cool to date an older guy. Most of my friends had older boyfriends and I wanted one too. I used to work after school at my aunt's diner. It was a regular hangout spot for kids from the local schools. Plenty of older guys but none of them noticed me. Until Scott. He saw me working at the diner one day while having fries with his buddies and asked me if I'd go see a movie with him that night. I was so excited.

Scot was 18 and fine as hell. He was a star baseball player at school and fawned over by many girls. I was young and dumb and actually thought he liked me. In the two weeks since meeting him, all my firsts came hard and fast (no pun intended). My first kiss, hj,bj,sex etc. Then he dumped me. I went over to his house one day and was met at the door by a beautiful girl around his age. She asked if I was Max's friend and I said I was Scott's girlfriend. She laughed and said she was Scott's girlfriend and went to get him. He came to the door and said "Look babe, it was just a bit of fun. I'm 18, I don't need little kids running around after me all day. Why don't you go out with Max? He's your age."

Max is Scott's brother who was in the same grade as me. I only knew him because he was Scott's brother. I'd never really talked to him before. About 3 days into my heart break, Max came up to me at lunch and said he wanted to apologize to me for what Scott did. We became fast friends after that moment and I got over Scott the way most people get over their first teen breakup.

So for 8 years Max and I were besties-in-love-who-wouldn't-admit-it-for-some-reason. Honestly, I don't know what took us so long but 8 years later Max asked me to be his girlfriend.

Let me update you on what went on with Scott during those 8 years. Scott had moved away after winning a baseball scholarship interstate. He would come back every once in a while to see his family and sometimes they would go to see him. Sometimes I would be at Max's house when Scott came back. We would exchange hellos and it was never awkward or anything. He played for 4 years but had to give baseball up after crashing his car while drunk. He injured a tendon in his arm really badly and his grip was never the same. He stayed interstate and found work as a model (I'm not kidding) then met someone and had two kids.

So after dating for 2 years, Max and I got married at 24. We've been happily married for 2 years now and recently had our first child, a baby girl.

While I was pregnant, one day Max told me Scott was moving back here as his marriage had dissolved and he wanted a fresh start. A few weeks later Scott moved back. A few weeks after moving back, he told Max he was in financial trouble and asked if he could come live with us. I was hesitant as we had a 2 month old baby but Max pleaded Scott's case and in the end I agreed.

So Scott moved in and it wasn't long before I noticed his creepy behaviors. The first incident was when he said "drat, still a little cutie! Wish I could've seen you pregnant" I told Max about it and he said Scott was just being jokey and "You know what Scott's like." A few days later he asked me if Max had ever tried my breast milk and if it had been "straight from the source" I ignored him and left the room. The next morning I was looking for something in the fridge and noticed there was one bottle of milk that I'd expressed missing. Later on I walked past Scott who was watching tv. He waggled his eyebrows at me and said "Tasted like vanilla." I said "what does?" and as the words were leaving my mouth I realized what he meant.

I stayed away for the rest of the day and when Max got home I told him what had happened and that I wanted Scott gone. He said he would speak to Scott. He did and when he came back to me it became apparent that Scott had convinced him I was making things up. He said I'd told him I still like him all these years later and made a move on him and when he rejected me I'd become angry. Since then he has taken breast milk from the fridge on multiple occasions. Sometimes he walks past me and whispers "Yummy" or makes sucky faces at me. I've taken to packing all the baby stuff in the morning and hanging out at the shops all day so I'm not stuck at home with Scott. This morning he said "Perfect in my latte" and winked at me. Every time I try to talk to Max he just belies Scott's story and is even getting annoyed with me now.

What should I do?

tl;dr: My BIL is stealing and drinking my breast milk.

# ¿ Oct 3, 2016 19:52

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

quote:

I'm currently on a camping trip with a small group of college friends. This group includes 4 girls and 4 guys including me. I've been crushing on one of the girls since we met at college and we're very good friends. We text each other a lot and it was actually her preference to share a tent with me. Naturally I was very happy about this because she's very cute and I like her. Btw, our tent has a divider that runs down the middle so you cannot see the person next to you, allowing for more privacy.

Anyway so the first day nothing happened. We all went to sleep at around midnight and everything was okay. The next day we all retreated to our tents once again at night but I couldn't sleep so I was up playing games on my phone. Apart from my crush and I , everyone else was already asleep at this point. So I'm just minding my own business and playing games when I suddenly I hear this faint noise coming from her side. I couldn't make it out at first because it was so quiet but then it got louder and they were clearly sexual moans. I genuinely thought I was hallucinating and convinced myself that there's no way I'm seriously hearing this. At one point she got loud enough for me to hear fully and it felt like an eternity. I left the tent to get some cold fresh air and sat on the grass for 10 minutes

We've stayed here for 4 days now and she's been doing this for the past 3 nights. I literally cannot sleep at night when I hear her. It's so drat distracting I can't even hear my own thoughts. I have to go and get fresh air every time I start hearing her. Even when she's done I'm still fully awake and cannot sleep for another 3 hours and by that time the sun is up. When I wake up in the morning after having slept for 2-4 hours my friends ask me why I look I so tired.

What's even more terrifying is that one morning she asked me "did you hear that last night?" I almost got a heart attack and asked her what she meant. Of course she was talking about something entirely irrelevant and I was so relieved. She gave me a wtf look and asked me why I'm being so jumpy and weird.

How the hell do I even tell her to keep it down without seeming like the biggest creep on the planet? I can't remember the last time I got a good nights sleep. It's driving me absolutely mad. How do I go about doing this without her thinking I'm a perverted loser? Is there even a way or am I hosed for the next few days??

TL;DR I can hear my crush masturbate every night and it's loud enough to prevent me from sleeping or even thinking. Should I tell her to keep it down or is that the best way to ruin this relationship?

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 20:28

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

loquacius posted:

is it just me or does this seem like a fairly obvious signal to him that he's just completely missing

It seems like it's out of a comedy movie, I can only imagine the nonverbal cues that the guy totally missed while she said "did you hear me last night".

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 20:45

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

loquacius posted:

Be the change you want to see in the world then, smash the patriarchy

I definitely sperged my way out of several sure things as a teenager, because my self esteem was so low in my formative years that the idea someone could possibly actually want to mess around with me took a while to seem plausible. Hearing it in plain English would have helped speed things along.

Yeah younger me was guilty as well, I "get it" and hope reddit helps him out.

"My crush came over in a nurse outfit and her boobs were all hanging out and stuff, soooo distracting. She kept talking about examining me and putting on rubber gloves real slow. Well, long story short, 3 consultations later I'm still not vaccinated for Typhoid! What gives reddit?"

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 21:59

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

IT'S MDMA GOD DAMMIT HE BOUGHT BUNK MDMA

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 23:04

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Lol yeah I think the anime one is what prompted me to post the original thread, if zelda counts as anime maybe she can get with the zelda guy.

I still wanna know where "my partner doesn't know I'm a girl" went.

# ¿ Oct 4, 2016 23:54

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

rrelationships: perched on a toilet like a crow to hide my hairy ankles and crocs

# ¿ Oct 5, 2016 01:29

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I hope that guy never sees what a butt looks like without jpeg artifacts.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2016 02:52

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Naerasa posted:

This would be impressive if you then went out and got all the dick diseases so you could document the destruction of your dick

call your photo series "the rise and fall of the tumescent empire"

# ¿ Oct 5, 2016 18:54

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

mind the walrus posted:

I like the part where an adult woman who is capable of reasonable independence and taking care of two growing children for months on end never once had "contact the loving authorities" come into her head.

Calling the police on a sibling would certainly be my last resort...I imagine threatening to would be a better move.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2016 22:24

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Pick posted:

Weddings are just IRL unboxing videos.

lol

# ¿ Oct 6, 2016 06:39

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

The rules of that subreddit are really bizarre and arcane, like you're not supposed to link to stuff, even other stuff on reddit for some reason? None of it makes any sense.

# ¿ Oct 6, 2016 16:23

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I liked this one.

quote:

We've been together for almost two years. She works from home doing editing, but most of her time is spent with her dogs. She is a working owner (I guess, I don't know the lingo) with two belgian shepherds and two sighthounds. She gets up around 4 every morning to run them and then takes the belgians to a nearby farm to herd. Basically the rest of the day she spends hiking and going to classes and stuff with them.

This is all good with me, and I think it's great she has a little hobby to entertain her. We've been talking about moving in together (she owns a house so I would move in there). It's great for dogs, she has a lot of land, and I always enjoy being over there. The dogs are extremely well trained so it's not crazy at all (when my gf is there. I had to dogsit for a day once and forgot to exercise them and it was really scary because the belgians got wild and destroyed a bunch of stuff and were biting near my face and throwing toys at me. She hasn't let me dogsit since but we've moved passed it).

Anyway, she's a huge animal lover. Anytime we go to someone's house with a pet, they're immediately drawn to my girlfriend and she spends most of the time playing with them.
Well, a couple days ago I told my girlfriend I wanted to get a husky. I expected her to be really excited because both her sighthounds are the same breed, and both her belgian shepherds are the same variety so thought she would like something new.

She was not into the idea, at all. She said something like, "Huskies are completely unappealing to me in almost every way. They don't have the type of drive I need for what we do. Unless you plan on not moving in and raising this dog entirely yourself, I am not okay with this."

So basically she thinks the responsibility of this dog is going to be on her if I move in. She's also telling me doesn't have room for 5 dogs and two people in her car (she has these weird expensive crate things in her car and can fit her current 4 dogs).

I don't know what to do at this point. I really want a husky and I know she will fall in love with it if she just opens up to the idea. How can I convince her?

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 19:30

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I've never owned a dog and have barely tried to help my expert dog owner girlfriend with her four, but I watched a documentary about the iditarod and I tooootally want a huskie!!! Why doesn't my bitch of a girlfriend want me to move a fifth difficult dog in whose care will inevitably get foisted onto her when I get bored of dog ownership after 3 months???

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 19:33

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

I don't think she sounds crazy, she just doesn't want to commit to taking care of a fifth dog for a decade with absolutely no thought being put into it at all. The OP sounds like an idiot who never thinks ahead longer than a month. In the comments he already deleted one where he wrote asking how he can convince her that "she wouldn't have all the responsibility", ie, still admitting she'd have some.

It's like buying a tuba on a whim when you live with a professional symphony musician, only you gave up on day one when you tried to learn the violin, and the tuba is a living breathing creature that dies if you don't play it twice a day.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 19:49

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Jeffnote: I am a chosen person and thus allowed to laugh at this. It sounds totally serious and the poster even acknowledged it sounded like a joke.

I [27F] want to get Jewish genetic testing with my husband [29M] before we get pregnant. All he seems to care about is how much it costs.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 20:01

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Jack Trades posted:

What is "Jewish genetic testing" and what does it have to do with pregnancy?
Are they afraid that religion will spread to their kids genetically?

I'm dumb. Someone explain this to me.

Jewish people(specifically ashkenazi ones) only really married each other for hundreds of years so they have all sorts of genes that are mostly only present in that population. There are some that have persisted because they are beneficial in heterozygotes and harmful only in homozygotes. Common side effects include sitcom writing and death in childhood.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 20:18

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Serves him right for not just buying near-perfect replicas from china.

# ¿ Oct 10, 2016 22:02

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

she married benny the snake

# ¿ Oct 11, 2016 22:45

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

My husband [34 M] acts like Larry David and I want him to stop

quote:

We've been married for 5+ years and it was so wonderful and fun in the beginning. Recently he's developed a borderline obsession with Curb Your Enthusiasm - a show about Larry David. The main character is always worried and stressed out. Constantly finding himself in awkward social situations.

His instances of "socially awkward situations" began to significantly increase and it's embarrassing to witness.
- Friends of ours had a child and he dropped the baby on the floor.
- He offended a co-worker publicly by saying that she wasn't good at her job.
- He borrowed a frisbee and threw it into the woods but refused to look for it because he didn't want to get poison ivy.
- He asked for a ride to buy beer then when it came time to pay he didn't have his wallet.
- He scratched his chest hair then tried to give people cheese slices with his hands.

We had a difficult conversation the other night. I told him that we are growing apart and not communicating. I said to him that his Larry David moments aren't sexy and I want him to change. It really threw him for a loop and he said he was sorry. But ultimately he hasn't done anything to change his behavior. We went out for sushi with friends and he started doing the Larry David thing at the restaurant.

- Made a big deal about a miscommunication with the Japanese waitress.
- Asked what other people wanted to order then said that he didn't like that food.
- Decided he didn't want to leave a tip and demanded to know what everyone else was tipping.

What advice would you offer in this situation? I can honestly say that acting like Larry David is making his life worse and I don't want to be around him anymore. I don't know how to help him see the light.
tl;dr - husband acts like Larry David. asked him to stop acting like Larry David, he hasn't changed and I can't stand it anymore.

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 18:15

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Tender Bender posted:

Did he drop the baby on purpose or did he do it by accident but then start doing a bit when everyone was upset? I don't really get it.

lol yeah it raises more questions than it answers....clearly the baby is the most relevant thing

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 18:26

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Haha I found an old one, anyone wanna guess how it ends? Answer in the next post.

quote:

Me and my boyfriend have been together for three years and have lived together for one year. I've been a vegetarian since I was eleven years old through my own choice, no one else in my family is veggie. My bf eats meat. Although my dream, ideal partner probably would be a vegetarian, I view this as a Dan Savage 'price of admission' for an otherwise great guy.

Usually we cook veggie meals and he adds meat to them. If he wants a meal where that doesn't work, we just cook our own things and eat them together. The cooking works out to about 50/50 and so does the cleaning, so I don't think the problem is with that. He eats meat most days, I have no problem with meat in the flat. I won't cook it, that's all, cause it grosses me out. Meat pizzas and stuff like that I don't mind, but nothing than involves really touching the meat.

Recently he's been really obsessed with my vegetarianism in a way he never had before - he's always made stupid jokes but that's a better reaction than a lot of people. He's proper grilled me about it around four times in the past fortnight. Anyone who's been veggie know how annoying those constant conversations are. He's started genuinely saying that its stupid, unhealthy, hipster, all that stuff. I've shown him the studies saying vegetarians usually live longer, that a veggie and even vegan diet is accepted unanimously by dieticians as just as healthy as a meat one - he just doesn't accept it. He has a far worse diet than I do! I don't snack, don't eat fast food, don't have sugary drinks and he does all the time. (We're both slim however.) He's been asking if I'd ever quit a lot too. I'd like to point out that I never bring my vegetarianism up in conversation because usually people just try to lecture you. Whenever we talk about it, he brings it up.

Now, there's been a handful of times in the past few weeks when he'll cook a meal for us and I'll notice that it's not vegetarian. Some examples:
He made spag bol saying it was quorn when it just obviously wasn't. They don't look the same. When I pointed this out, he just laughed and said it was a brain fart and he forgot - which, okay, whatever, I guess that could happen.

He gave me a sandwich with ham on it (another mistake, apparently, since he was making us both them and just put the ham on both, despite this never having been a problem before).

He made himself a bacon butty and asked if I wanted an egg one. I say yes and when I walk into the kitchen he's using the same pan that he'd used for bacon. He said he didn't know this was a problem when he 100% did because he always swapped pans before this. And it's not about the washing up, because when he cooks, I wash up and the other way around.

He made chicken enchiladas and told me they were veggie. Luckily I saw the chicken when I cut it in half. Same excuses: an honest mistake.

I thus far haven't accidentally eaten any meat. I've been cooking for myself for the past week, but he keeps offering to cook for both of us. Am I just being paranoid? The idea of him sneaking meat into my food seems crazy but it really seems like he is! Why would he even bother to do that??

tl;dr: Boyfriend has become aggressive towards my vegetarianism and I think he's trying to sneak meat into my food.

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 18:41

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

quote:

So after posting, I stuck to only eating food I'd made and my bf got more and more antsy about cooking for me. I sat him down the next day and asked him the same stuff: if he had a problem with my vegetarianism, why he was trying to contaminate my food: since I asked WHY and not IF, he blew up. Demanding to know why I didn't trust him, how I could accuse him of this. He also kept trying to get me to explain why I'm veggie in the first place, but he knows this well so I didn't let him derail the conversation. Eventually, after the most frustrating, circular argument ever, he stormed off to our bedroom. We didn't speak that night or the morning.

When I got home the next day, he'd actually gone and cooked an entire chicken "for us". He asked me if I'd eat it. It was so surreal: him stood at the kitchen counter with this cooked chicken asking me to eat it when he's never known me to eat meat, as if we hasn't been arguing about this at all. I didn't even respond. I shouldered my way past him to the fridge ... which was a massive mistake. I guess he went a little nuts. I still can't really believe this happened, but he grabbed me by my hair at the back on my head and with another hand tried to force chicken into my mouth.

I am still shocked by this. It was terrifying, he was so much stronger than me. He didn't succeed and after some moments of me struggling, he let go. He just stood there, looking defeated while I literally ran out of the kitchen and got some stuff and went to my parent's. I'm there now, it's been the better part of a week. He's agreed to move out: put up no fight for the flat or for us (which I wouldn't accept of course anyway). When we spoke on the phone to decide this, he sounded ashamed. Quiet. I hope he's ashamed.

I'll never know why he suddenly snapped about my vegetarianism and I frankly don't care anymore, he's obviously just a wanker to do that anyway. This past month or so has been so different to the test of our relationship, it's crazy, but there's no coming back from this. I'm well shot of him.

tl;dr: BF tried to force feed me, we're done.

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 18:41

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

subhuman filth posted:

Man, really lovely of them to damage your narrative with their orientation

we get it, stop, please

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 22:07

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

china bot posted:

unfortunately there are some people - it is called satyriasis in men, nymphomania in women - who engage in sex compulsively and without joy. these unfortunate souls cannot love in the true sense of the word. Our mutual acquaintance GF (43 F) is one of these.

banned for no tl;dr

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 22:07

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

say what you want about the tenets of polyamory dude, at least it's an ethos

# ¿ Oct 12, 2016 22:24

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

phasmid posted:

No, it was not shut down for people talking. Derails were near-constant. It was "shut down" because GBS was trashed and reincarnated as this...whatever this is.

The first one was closed because of a dumb multi-page moridin slapfight. None of that. You're talking about the second iteration. I'd still prefer no linking - I try to look for funny OP comments when I post one but usually I am posting brand new ones. Obviously it's not too hard to track down the original thread if you're really itching for it but I think it's better if we forget that in theory we could go tell the OP what to do.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2016 18:26

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Dial-a-Dog posted:

I think what angers me the most about these /r/relationships posts is that my brain constantly misparses the age/sex part in brackets. I feel like it should go before the person it's describing and it drives me crazy when all the people are grouped close together. Maybe I'm just coming down with a touch of the tism.

Nah it's really bad and ambiguous when they write things like "My [24f] SO with his [32m] MIL(52F), brought home unwanted ferrets", the first one is ambiguous so you gotta read until the second one and then go back. It's like reading the sentence "the old man the boat" where you gotta stop and re-parse the first part after reading the second part.

# ¿ Oct 13, 2016 18:59

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

drat....I read that as "her mom" the first time. Yikes...

# ¿ Oct 13, 2016 21:53

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

she should double dog dare them to 69 each other

# ¿ Oct 13, 2016 22:08

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Please don't post that redpill stuff in here, there wasn't really much humor there. More chicken forcefeed.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2016 07:37

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Also, *shifty eyes*

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3760159&userid=146071

note the dates

# ¿ Oct 14, 2016 07:38

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Leon Einstein posted:

Young women dating manchildren in their upper 30s deserve everything they get.

Saying you want to put it up a cheerleaders butt is middle schooler talk. Wtf.

In fairness, I'm sure the butt was lovely.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2016 23:11

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# ¿ Apr 27, 2024 11:33

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

What will the people in town think???? is a pretty stupid concern even if those guys sound insufferable. I could do without them or the OP.

# ¿ Oct 16, 2016 11:43

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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