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Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Excellent thread title, OP.

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Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008


As an FF14 player I am so loving sick of this guy.

They seriously hyped him up like crazy and he just turned out to be Diet Luca Blight.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Elephant Ambush posted:

WTF am I doing wrong?

You're playing games that you clearly don't enjoy.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

The only thing Zenos has going for him imho is that he is, as they say, "dummy thicc".

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Detective No. 27 posted:

This week's episode of Retronauts is their second part of their FF7 retrospective. Jeremy had this amazing revelation. Cloud and Buzz Lightyear have the same story arc.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Orcs and Ostriches posted:

FFXII doesn't have MMO style combat though. If it did, it would have been a vast improvement.

Modern MMO combat, no, but It's nearly identical to FF11 and other pre-WOW MMOs.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

morallyobjected posted:

wasn't that for XIV and not XIII?


Help Im Alive posted:

I thought the rock thing was XV

This is Square Enix we're talking about, it could very well be all three.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

sponges posted:

What’s bad about it? I’m going to power through it regardless but I kinda want to know what I’m in for.

It tried a lot of new, different things and didn't quite stick the landing. The main thing is that there's no character experience or levels, instead you have experience and levels for stats, weapon skills, and spells. You gain experience for these by using them, so attacking with a sword gives you sword XP. The overall system is fine and actually pretty interesting for a late 80s RPG, but there are some pretty big flaws:

-The experience curve for weapon skills and spells is way too high. It can take up to 100 battles to get a skill up, and if you're fighting enemies that are too weak you don't get any XP at all. This was improved in the GBA and later versions.
-You have to take damage to gain HP XP. If you play the game normally, you won't have enough HP to survive a lot of late game attacks. To get enough you have to actually attack your own characters in battle. This was also improved in later versions - you just get an HP up every 10 battles or so.
-Evasion is highly overvalued. Lots of late game enemies have dangerous status effects attached to their main attacks, and the only way to avoid these is with evasion. Some enemies have drain attacks that do percentile damage which ignore armor.
-Conversely, armor is nearly useless and even detrimental. It lowers evasion, and also makes magic less effective (the game doesn't tell you this at all). You basically have to have your characters running around naked for the majority of the game, until you get armor with stat boosts or resistances.
-Instant death spells are way overpowered, particularly Toad. A character with a decently leveled Toad spell can OHKO nearly every enemy in the game (and literally every one with a specific glitch).

I think it's still a decent game, but definitely play the GBA or later versions if you actually want to have fun.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

FF2's world is already empty and boring so it doesn't matter that everything gets destroyed.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

DrNutt posted:

Yeah, my biggest stumbling block right now is that I feel intense pressure to always have at least one of each role available, which means either running Lightning/Hope/Snow or Vanille/Sazh/Fang. I do have all roles unlocked now but it's so expensive to level a fourth role that it seems like a trap/grind sink.

Yeah you're not meant to invest in secondary roles until you're done with your primary ones for the most part. Getting Ruin from Hope's commando tree is a good idea though.

If you're still having trouble with the Ambling Bellows, it's susceptible to Pain, which completely shuts it down. Make Vanille your party leader and spam it until it connects, then the rest of the fight should be easy.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

FF13 had the right way of doing it, because being able to beat the optional superbosses in all the other games meant that the actual final boss of the game was trivially easy.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

You should play more games, then.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

MikeJF posted:

Does Ivalice have toilet paper.

Yes, but it's forbidden once every 10 days. Recommended: pine cones.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Living on Hydalaen sounds great until you realize that their calendar system is literally "it has been XX days since the last apocalypse".

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

I like Noel :shobon: He's pretty upbeat for being literally the last human alive, you gotta respect that.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Onmi posted:

There are hard rules to loving causality, This is "History is written by the winners" taken to a stupid end.

If time travel is possible then causality doesn't matter at all in the first place. I took that line to mean that the timeline of FF13's world is all kinds of hosed up, which it probably would be if you could travel through time. So changing something in what we perceive as the future could alter what we perceive as the past. You're basically saying that it's dumb because that's not how time travel works in other sci-fi stories (which also isn't even true, there are plenty of far more outlandish time travel stories out there).

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Rirse posted:

What the best way to get HP levels in Final Fantasy II (J)? I'm playing the PSP version which by far is pretty nice, but poor Maria even in the front line is only getting about 6 HP whenever the party all get a group HP, while Frion and Guy get like 20 or so. I see Frion or Guy get a solo HP up when they take a big hit, but enemies miss a lot on Maria.

Also I really should avoid using teleport. Got it up to level 4 with Minwu and even the big bad monster in a box instantly dies to it.

Make Maria (or whatever character you prefer, but a lot of folks prefer Maria for her high base agility) your only front row character. That way she takes all of the normal physical attacks. If you have more than one front row character, then you just end up spreading out the possible stat ups.

And there's no reason to stop using teleport, at least until you get a better instant kill spell with better accuracy. Teleport is actually the worst IKO spell, just for comparison.

Fister Roboto fucked around with this message at 01:49 on Apr 16, 2019

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

You can beeline them pretty fast though. It's uh... 7 story missions in? And none of them are particularly difficult.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Barudak posted:

I mean the solution in FFVII to Mako technology killing the planet is to go back to burning coal so the game has some weird feelings about tech.

TBF if I had to choose between polluting the atmosphere and literally consuming the souls of the dead which prevents new life from forming, I'm pretty sure I'd go with the former.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Merilan posted:

I could be wrong but doesn't Shinra as a company in FF7 think the whole 'it kills the souls of the planet' is just utter rubbish spouted by eco-terrorists and hippies out to smear them (outside of one-offs like Hojo who Know The Truth but have ulterior motives)

Like I don't think the random Joe or Jane in FF7 knows about that outside of like, deep spiritualist types in Cosmo Canyon either

Yeah outside of Midgar and like Mt. Nibel things look like they're doing pretty OK. All you really have is some old dude on a floating orb's word to go by.

They probably could have added a little flavor to show that the world was hosed. Like farmer NPCs complaining about their crops failing for no reason, or doctors saying that like half of the pregnant women they treat have stillbirths. Literally anything substantive beyond grandpa glowworm telling you "mako is the souls of the dead, also souls are real btw."

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

DrNutt posted:

OTOH there's not really any reason to assume that the world of FF7 follows our laws of nature and physics when it comes to coal or oil, for all we know it's all good clean energy that's safe for the planet as long as you're not consuming the souls of the dead.

Not a big fan of that line of reasoning, it means you can throw everything out the window if it's convenient. There's also literally no reason to suspect that fossil fuels don't work the same as in real life, other than they think it's better than mako.

I think it's just some throwaway dramatic irony :shrug:

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

But why would you assume that they don't work the same unless told otherwise? I'm not saying that everything works exactly the same, just that there's no reason to think that most things don't, other than possibly explaining a few lines of dialogue in a particular way.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

DrNutt posted:

Also because most FF worlds make zero effort to resemble the real world in any way shape or form?

Sorry but this is just nonsense.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

You're way overthinking it.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

When you think about it, the real Sephiroth was all the clones we made along the way.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Reeve is actually the robot. He's being controlled by Iscar Matthias

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Tall Tale Teller posted:

tits, an edge lord, a muppet or a stereotype.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

NikkolasKing posted:

Yeah I never realized this either for a long time. I blame the graphics and the less-than-ideal camera angle.

After giving the Black Materia to Sephiroth he starts hitting Aerith which is why he has to be knocked out by...Vincent I think? Somebody.

People talk about them not being able to do the Wall Market scenes in the remake, but this scene would be pretty drat disturbing without the blocky cartoon graphics. They removed the scene in FF6 where Celes gets beat up by a guard, so I can't imagine them keeping this one.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Merilan posted:

Yeah Aeris struck me from what I remember as just like being real chuffed about the idea

You get the impression that this is not the first time she's done this.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008



FF14 is extremely horny.

e: I just remembered the name of this bar is "The Missing Member". It's where the all-female pirate crew hangs out.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

YggiDee posted:

Probably the same thing a Met is?

Mets is short for Metropolitan, because they were originally the New York Metropolitan Baseball Club.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Every now and then I feel like replaying FF10, but then I remember that it has no cutscene skip in any version of it.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

I guess I forgot the part in Star Wars where they find out that everything is being manipulated behind the scenes by god-like beings, and Princess Leia realizes that she needs to let go of her dead husband and the anger that's driving her.

It's a surface-level similarity and nothing more. There are a million other movies and games that have surface-level similarities with Star Wars because it's such a cultural touchstone.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Well poo poo, I guess every single work of fiction can be a ripoff of Star Wars if you fudge things around like that hard enough.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Characters that aren't in your active party get a portion of battle XP, so it's not too hard to keep them up to speed.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

If I was in charge of designing an FF8 remake, here's what I'd do:

-Get rid of spell charges entirely. If you have Fire, you can use it as many times as you want.
-When you equip a spell to a stat slot, it gives you the full amount that you would have with 100 charges.
-If you equip a spell to a stat slot, you can't use it in combat.
-You have a limited number of slots for spells that you can use in combat. Like 4 at the start, but it can be upgraded through GF abilities.
-If you draw from an enemy, it can no longer use that spell. Though this might cause them to use even more dangerous abilities...

I think that would get rid of a lot of issues that the system has. I'll be expecting my check in the mail soon, SE.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

NikkolasKing posted:

After you get done with Lindblum you'll have a bit more room to run around and a few optional minigames to do-+ treasure to collect.

Also while you are in Lindblum you will participate in a contest for the story. You can have either Zidane, Vivi or somebody else important win this. I recommend letting the new character win. It's not vital or anything but they get the best prize.

It's also nice that it's easiest to just let her win. You can literally sit around doing nothing for seven minutes and get a cool accessory for it.

Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Detective No. 27 posted:

I hope there's an option to play FF7R with the old translation.

Fully voice acted too.

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Fister Roboto
Feb 21, 2008

Cleretic posted:

A friend of mine pointed out that video includes a scene that isn't in the original game at all. Cloud meeting Sephiroth on some sort of collapsing highway, which isn't a match for any of Sephiroth's appearances. Certainly not his first one, which is in a cargo hold.

To me, that reads as them cramming Sephiroth into the Sector drop, I can't think of anywhere else that would fit. So, yeah, so much for this even being faithful to the story.

Pretty sure it's supposed to be this scene:





Except with a vision of Sephiroth instead of a disembodied voice inside Cloud's head.

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