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DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

crispix posted:

August thread off to a highbrow start, then :coffeepal:

Let me do my best:

Greggs is horny as gently caress

It appeals to carnal desires and satisfies them quick. It's cheap and it's poo poo and I will do it anyway without shame because that itch can only be scratched certain ways


*Edit 2BC- Phraates V becomes king of the Parthian Empire, after he and his mother "the goddess Musa" murdered his father Phraates IV.



DesperateDan fucked around with this message at 08:19 on Aug 1, 2019

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DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

deletebeepbeepbeep posted:

I'd like to find a new job but I'm a bit nervous about making a switch and then immediately being laid off because of Brexit. At least at the moment I have the benefit of state redundancy to the maximum amount.

Is there anyway to limit the risk of this, anyone else hanging on to a job that makes them miserable due to possible implications of Brexit?

Just move directly to doing crimes imho



(Sorry you hate your job, good luck on a new one)


Julio Cruz posted:

chicken and duck seems like an odd choice

I guess it's too expensive for Sainsbury's to do one that's just duck on its own

Duck can be pretty strong on its own, I can see it being a good combo

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
Cheesy chips are far better done at home with some decent homefries style oven chips mixed in with plenty of strong cheddar imho

I often top with some chicken bisto for a knock off poutine, or sometimes a golden curry sauce mix if I'm feeling rich

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

justcola posted:

Speaking of, I have around 50 or so spiders living on my back wall and window, with most of it covered in webs and eggs. I've never seen spiders live so close to one another as thought they were quite territorial, but this group seem to work together and have caught hundreds of flies. I've watched them and they seem to respect each others space and not steal food or anything, it's quite strange really.

Spider communism.

When some spiders have enough food they don't care about proximity

https://i.imgur.com/DEK9JGx.gifv

Good bug weather it seems




It's getting to be blackberry season again too so get stuck in


*Edit* 2035 January 8 – Near-Earth object 2002 AY1 will make a close approach to Earth, but I'm sure if we put our minds to it we could get it on target

DesperateDan fucked around with this message at 14:55 on Aug 4, 2019

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Ratjaculation posted:

Mix them into an apple crumble... then give it to me

In this household it's apple, blackberry and rhubarb crumble or gently caress off

Choice of custard and/or ice cream though

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
If you have a twitter account and haven't been blocked by the likes of tweetman and galaxy o'brain then thats some shameful poo poo imo and you should try harder

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
Camping is good with the right preparations, including, but not limited to the following

-toilet roll
-drugs
-insect spray thats at least 50% deet
-more drugs
-spare toilet roll
-beans
-some form of tent (optional)

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

StarkingBarfish posted:

That's absolutely hilarious. What on earth was Cohen trying to pull?

Before chukkatigcukadem came about, there were 3 years of constant articles talking about how very very soon the great centrist fightback would begin and 50 or 60 or 70 mp's had already decided to defect and it was all go go go and soon those drat lefties would see what a bunch of centrists could do

This is the same poo poo, by the same folk- trying to create a political reality by just declaring that an imminent victory is inevitable and hoping enough people hop on board

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

notaspy posted:

I don't like using the phrase sheep but that is what they are, sheep waiting to be herded.

Fubpees operate like a cult does- they drown each other in support and love but any deviation from the faith (corbyn bad, all things were fine under neoliberalism, thou shalt not bear witness to any political activity but brexit) leads to immediate shunning.

Bit like what we do with monster munch but with politics (or rather, lack thereof)

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Josef bugman posted:

Could I ask something, why does this particular set of ideas depress me than all the others? Why is Anti-Semitism being used to attack someone who has, at the very least, been apologetic and kind about loving up so much more depressing than anything else flung at Corbyn?

Other stuff was tried- the "czech spy" and "he's in the 'ra" were pushed really hard a few years back- the AS stuff could always be pushed more as any hint of anti-semitism within labour is instantly pointed to as evidence of the massive conspiracy within labour whereas the first two were always reliant entirely on older bullshit. Plus, as a labour member I don't really give two fucks about the first two.

It's interesting to compare to the treatment of ed milliband- who was simultaneously painted as an antisemite for recognising the plight of Palestinians while getting viciously dog whistled by the press with "the guy who can't even eat a bacon sandwich" and "he had a marxist bolshevik dad who hated britain look at his crooked nose" etc.

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Tesseraction posted:

Apparently it's national Tell a Joke day and I've been resisting Tweeting the hashtag out with "The Lib Dems" all loving day

I just stole this and posted it

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

namesake posted:

Quote if you remember all the Tory leadership candidates talking about their various drug taking.

Quote even harder if you remember the Labour MP who the press harassed until she resigned because her son had taken drugs which was unacceptable.

just quoted so hard I had to grip the bath

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

forkboy84 posted:

Gosh. That's magical.

Not for Shane it wasn't

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Szmitten posted:

Will the whole thing be set in France or just that bit?

hon hon homme

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Pochoclo posted:

I never watched this Threads you mention but if you want your fix of nuclear depression you might want to watch When the Wind Blows

Threads is in the same vein but cuts deeper

Don't watch threads if you are feeling down

But then again that could apply to any footage of sheffield in the 80s

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Bobby Deluxe posted:

Quick poll of people who do not like marmite: how many of you mixed it with butter, because you are not supposed to eat it straight.

If you mix it with butter it tastes good. Like Twiglets good.

But like most things you aren't meant to do, it's loving great anyway

Tarnop posted:

I'm ready to hear some good suggestions on this. Strong cheddar and brown sauce is my go to

Toast the bread to 2/3rds desired toastiness. Base layer of ketchup mixed about 60/40 with some tomato puree, then add slices of cheddar with a scrape of mustard, arranged mustard face down into the sauce. Grill till cheese softens, add salt and pepper, add chopped up cherry tomatoes then drown it in hendos. Grill till a sticky molten mess on the verge of calamity (much like the chef tbqh), occasionally smooshing the tomatoes into the cheese a bit.

Then a fried or poached egg on top to ensure victory

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Superterranean posted:

Who agitated for triggering a50 immediately after the vote? Who absolutely loving failed to campaign for remain because of a triangulation strategy that even now is only paying off with the most ukmt coloured glasses possible? What the gently caress does 'damaging tory brexit' mean besides 'we can do brexit better'?

I get you guys want fully automated luxury communism, who doesn't. Just that Labour has a leader who seems to think that the EU is incompatible with that goal.

"Source your quotes"/"who bought weetman an account"

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
An article with some variation of "scientists say this fab invention is gonna save us" is just fluff

The only thing that will save us is the prompt and complete eradication of capitalism by any means necessary

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
He's gonna send a .zip file he says contains the documents but is actually just a renamed .jpg of the union jack

The mail and sun present this as the most savvy diplomacy ever conceived

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
I liked irn bru more when it was full sugary madness but the replacement is alright. The irn bru chew bars were good too.

I'm also partial to some dandelion and burdock or a decent fiery ginger beer

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

OwlFancier posted:

Blink 182 was a band.

Enema of the state was a proper good album

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Pochoclo posted:

Man, I just tried Bisto gravy and it has zero taste to it

The standard brown one?

I normally use the chicken one instead, it has flavours

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
When I studied it I always used "planetary body" in assignments because it bumped up my word count a bit and also because it's all just leftover bits of star of various sizes and behaviours anyway

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.
Definitely pronouncing it "vonk" and not "vee-ohh-enh-cee"



Might set up a petition or something

DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

Pistol_Pete posted:

Has anyone had any communications from the Labour party yet? I kinda feel like I should be doing something but I'm not sure what.

Got an email a few mins ago that refers to today's events but is otherwise "sign the petition and give money" which is a bit less than "report to your CLP to be given some hand grenades and a rifle" but there's always hope-

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DesperateDan
Dec 10, 2005

Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

forkboy84 posted:

Ahahahahahwhahaha

"there's always Hope" is possibly the most wrong thing I've seen in my years of reading Ukmt

Continuing to exist, even if only to spite people. Y'know. Hope.


xcheopis posted:

Link doesn't work.

And I doubt it's this guy but it's a relaxing channel where someone fixes up old junk (mainly small, old engines) while talking quietly and calmly and there's none of the standard youtube channel bullshit, not even a loving gaudy intro.


Angrymog posted:

Does anyone have a good list of things to put in a one person Brexit-box?

Toilet paper, disinfectant, cooking oil, salt and pepper.

Then look at the poo poo you normally eat that has long dates on it and buy that in too- for me it's lots of pasta and rice and then tinned stuff/spices to add to it. Tinned fruit for desserts. Multivitamins. Paracetamol/Ibuprofen.

And as you put everything in, note down on paper- or even better excel- what you have, how many and when the best before date is. I'm glad I did, because at a glance I can see I don't need to rotate much from the stocks built up earlier this year.

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