[COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

«‹›3 »

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

mod sassinator posted:

what in THE gently caress is going on with the presser today? so military men speaking biggly and strongly about drug trafficking??

The presser was too (relatively) normal and sane yesterday. Gotta crank that chaos and nonsense dial back to 11.

# ¿ Apr 1, 2020 22:49

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 17, 2024 00:34

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Burn Zone posted:

why the gently caress are they talking about drug interdiction

Um, they're also kicking up poo poo with Iran and China. Keep up, geez. :rolleye:

# ¿ Apr 1, 2020 22:59

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

anime was right posted:

fountains of wayne is named after a fountain store in wayne new jersey. they sell lawn fountains and lawn fountain accessories.

That totally just jogged my memory about a scene in the Sopranos and sure enough, it's the same place.

# ¿ Apr 2, 2020 00:59

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

mod sassinator posted:

omfg jared kushner is talking now on the presser

No, that's obviously just the squeaky voiced teenager from The Simpsons.

# ¿ Apr 2, 2020 23:08

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Asproigerosis posted:

$500 for a nintendo switch gently caress OFFFF I just wanted to animal crossing

I saw someone on a local FB site complaining about hoarding and price gouging and telling people to complain to the FTC.

They were very specifically and only complaining about Animal Crossing, lol.

# ¿ Apr 2, 2020 23:26

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Paramemetic posted:

Mormons running victory laps with their whole living prophet / ongoing revelation thing while other churches scramble to figure out how to contend with changing situations

I mean, the apocalypse bunkers full of food and supplies are paying off as well right now.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2020 01:07

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Charles 2 of Spain posted:

It's rugby league, so you have to make sure there aren't any dogs on the island.

Unfortunately, I understand that reference. :chloe:

# ¿ Apr 3, 2020 01:26

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1245876816922972162

The P Act is real

Show us the PPE tape, Trumo.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2020 02:24

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Tunicate posted:

look, that was the story you were told, but there's also the real reason that name gets given to black cats in the south

Maybe the cat was in the CIA. Let's not jump to conclusions.

# ¿ Apr 3, 2020 22:39

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

sexpig by night posted:

one house for livin, one for fuckin

fuckin is life, bro

# ¿ Apr 3, 2020 22:46

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

+1 unemployed goon. Fired by email. Thankfully the termination letter starts with "Because of ongoing COVID-19 pandemic" so I think I'll qualify for enhanced unemployment unless my lovely red state can find a way to gently caress me out of it.

It's weird, but I'm not even really that upset. On the scale of bad news that can come in this is relatively tame. Guess I'll just count my blessings and living relatives.

29 DAYS UNTIL THE MORTGAGE IS DUE

Just see if your mortgage owner will let you do a few extra chores around their corporate headquarters to knock a few bucks off your payment. Bing bong, so simple.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2020 00:32

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Trainee PornStar posted:

Holy poo poo! I'm a lily arsed white boy from the UK & even I think that may not be the best idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LI8Zx_QvNVU

# ¿ Apr 4, 2020 15:05

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

jarofpiss posted:

i would say it's also wrong for people to gloat over your family's gofundme when you die just because you're a terrible poster

# ¿ Apr 4, 2020 15:14

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Charles 2 of Spain posted:

Wanna see Barron play some sports.

Trump's a big fan of a certain type of sports if you know what I mean. :wink:

# ¿ Apr 4, 2020 23:29

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

uber_stoat posted:

hoarding update. all the tortillas are gone. every single package of 'tillas. not the tostadas, though, plenty of them left. I guess white people don't eat those. do even Mexicans eat store bought tostadas? mysteries.

We just fry regular tortillas to make tostadas. :ssh:

# ¿ Apr 5, 2020 04:20

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Civilized Fishbot posted:

You don't use two tortillas for each of your tacos? Freak

Double decker tacos are legit good.

# ¿ Apr 5, 2020 04:31

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Civilized Fishbot posted:

is that a term for when you make a taco out of two tortillas like normal or is it for when you make a taco with a layer of meat/filling between the tortillas like some kind of burger with a bun in the middle, which could potentially kick rear end but i've never seen such a thing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVmaYNtgu4g

# ¿ Apr 5, 2020 04:58

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

twoday posted:

nicotine patches are pretty chill unless you forget to take them off before you fall asleep, then you are buckled in for what feels like 100 hours of vivid bizarre dreams

Same with Chantix, I've heard.

# ¿ Apr 5, 2020 20:42

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

https://twitter.com/uncannyafghani/status/1246924236473667586

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 00:24

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

eighty-four merc posted:

i don't have any equipment to service

PM me.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 04:06

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

spaceblancmange posted:

The Queen has to hand the ceremonial pike to Lord Butterwoth first. Then the sitting of the House of Elders can convene.

I'm p sure this is fake but who the gently caress knows when it comes to the loving British.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 04:25

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

knew it

https://mobile.twitter.com/soapachu/status/1246793653294686208

Gives entirely new meaning to the term "wet market" iykwim. :wink:

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 06:14

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

A porn parody a of "JAWS" called "PAWgs: We're Gonna Need a Bigger Butt".

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 06:58

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

snoo posted:

I would get arrested for being topless outside

Go bottomless then, duh.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 07:16

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kuha5Im1RaQ

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 07:29

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

fosborb posted:

chicken thighs, bone in and skin on, are the only way to buy ethical chicken

My favorite fried chicken is bone in, skin on chicken thighs with no breading. So juicy and the crispy skin is amazing.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 07:37

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Over Easy posted:

what color does it turn people?

Blue but for a different reason.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2020 22:30

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

BrutalistMcDonalds posted:

i'm currently drinking one of those mango-flavored arizona teas

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWObybWWGW4

NGL, I thought that was going to be a really dark Trayvon Martin joke.

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 04:40

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Unhealthy old boomer goes to doctor, gets pumped with massive shot of socialized medicine doesn't feel good and changes - COVID-19. Many such cases!

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 06:55

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

That Chopin song always makes me think of Bad Santa. Excellent film.

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 07:08

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Woofer posted:

just wanna make sure everyone participated in this poll

https://twitter.com/journalistew/status/1246925471931076608

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 17:46

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

https://twitter.com/partiboi69/status/1245760555035566080

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 18:36

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

sportsgenius86 posted:

the postal service is being killed by internet companies sending packages

Trump just hates Bezos because he's a real billionaire.

Nothing the American people would love right now more than ever is for everything they buy online to get way more expensive.

# ¿ Apr 7, 2020 23:25

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

new kind of cat posted:

those are balls lol

# ¿ Apr 8, 2020 21:41

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Eat This Glob posted:

what sort of dipshit would knowingly aggrieve/bait-and-switch a person that just learned where you live? I'd chuck a loving brick through their window

Why the gently caress would the app be designed that way in the first place?

# ¿ Apr 9, 2020 22:30

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Virtual Russian posted:

The store i work in, and others in the area, were direct shipped pallets of restaurant grade bacon to sell at insanely low prices.

I have a surplus of bacon in my refrigerator because I've been buying it for $1.49/lb.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 00:10

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Agrajag posted:

am i alone in thinking bacon is overrated as gently caress?

It's pretty good if it's just barely cooked instead of burnt to a crisp but that's pretty much every meat tbf.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 01:04

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Alan Smithee posted:

where the gently caress you getting bacon that cheap

A local liquidation grocery store. They're like what Grocery Outlet was before they got bougie.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 01:12

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

twoday posted:

looks like someone is a bit late to discovering Edward Covidhands

This unearthed for me the memory that there was a front page article for the Horrors of Porn series that reviewed Edward Penishands so thanks for that.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 01:24

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 17, 2024 00:34

Edmund Sparkler: Jul 4, 2003; For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Applesnots posted:

I want to ride that bad boy down a hill calvin and hobbes style.

Ed:
Get some of that green tire "slime" so you dont really have to worry about flat tires.

I got to Calvin and Hobbes a wagon once. Would highly recommend.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2020 06:10

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > [COVID-19 April] I've licked things I might not ordinarily have licked

«‹›3 »