NFL Week 15 News/Views: Lamar Drops a Deuce & a Dime, all on Company Time.

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 15 News/Views: Lamar Drops a Deuce & a Dime, all on Company Time.

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Let he who has never done the Lamar Jackson scoot cast the first stone.

https://twitter.com/RGIII/status/1338707310940712963?s=19

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 05:52

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# ¿ May 19, 2024 11:14

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

lmfao

https://twitter.com/Ravens/status/1338712148734857218

Team account announces reigning mvp did not rush to the lockerroom to poop

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 06:40

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Henrik Zetterberg posted:

I appreciate the official Ravens Twitter posting this, but he was 100% taking a poo poo.

My "Did not rush to the bathroom to poop" press conference has people asking a lot of questions already answered by my press conference.

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 06:52

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

The Puppy Bowl posted:

I'm thinking he probably wasn't because of how long he took and the talk of an IV. That said Lamar should just embrace this poo poo. Print the legend and all that.

https://twitter.com/ProFootballDoc/status/1338710639095648256

Ah well that solves tha--
https://twitter.com/FFballblast/status/1338724340297314304

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 06:56

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

The qb doth protest too much, methinks

https://twitter.com/Lj_era8/status/1338756495467540486?s=19

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 09:17

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

poo tape is real

# ¿ Dec 15, 2020 18:31

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

the all caps makes it

# ¿ Dec 16, 2020 20:34

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

this is fine

https://twitter.com/Ravens/status/1339314260929818626

https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/1339315356452741130

# ¿ Dec 16, 2020 22:07

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Hot Diggity! posted:

More poop news

https://twitter.com/TG3II/status/1339308058787405824

https://twitter.com/TG3II/status/1339309751205769219

Todd Gurley - OUT (pinkeye)

# ¿ Dec 16, 2020 22:12

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

unleash the full power and might of the united states military on the six states comprising the area known as "new england" until it is a smoldering heap of ash and death

https://twitter.com/WEEI/status/1339528277468200960

some dumbfuck posted:

Maybe it�s the foot of snow outside my window here in Massachusetts that won�t let me move on. But Tom Brady�s recent declaration that you �won�t catch me dead living in the Northeast anymore� is still bothering me.

That was a Brady bomb last week, a direct shot across the New England bow from the new pirate captain. From a guy who wasn�t just one of us, but rather the embodiment of what a Northeasterner should be: Tough, hard-working, generous and loyal. Principled and courageous with a knack for modesty. For 20 years, Brady was the chiseled face of six New England states.

But the real Tom Brady has revealed himself in 2020, and he�s not the guy we thought he was.

Brady has made his choices this year, and they read as a short-cut manifesto: Individual glory over dynastic team loyalty. A dream team over a hard-work retool. Florida sun over New England character and passion.

This is not the pick-199 that rose above any and all obstacles in his way en route to six Lombardi trophies. This is a guy who has decided to take the easy way out.

And Brady�s now made it clear he�s not above taking shots at his old way of life, at the very fabric of the place that cultivated and nurtured his unprecedented 20-years of football success.

Sure, our weather stinks. We all know this. But in the words of the great Chris Rock, �Rich people can�t talk about poor people. That�s just mean. Like, �Look at these broke bastards! Perhaps we should raise the prices so we don�t have to see these people again! Is that a Hyundai? With cloth interior?� Yeah, man, you�ve got to watch what you say.�

Brady�s jab at our weather was more than just mean, it was a from-the-heart moment that revealed he�s glad to be gone, and that he doesn�t remember his time here very fondly. A week later, he hasn�t even bothered to craft a token apology for having his words taken out of context. No, Brady doesn�t care about us. Worse, he probably regrets us.

There is no other conclusion to draw from that unnecessary musket fired back at Patriots Nation. It was far more than a passing comment on the weather, it was a thumbing of the nose to any and all New England naysayers who have dared critique his departure without the undying and unconditional love and affection he feels he�s earned.

This comment came, by the way, during the same week TMZ reported on Brady�s purchase of a new multi-million dollar yacht �Viva a Vida,� Page Six reported that he�s purchased a $17 million dollar �tear-down� on �Billionaire Bunker� Island in Miami�s Biscayne Bay, and the Small Business Administration announced that Tom�s company TB12 had received $960,855 in a Paycheck Protection Program load from the federal government.

Boy, the pandemic has hit Brady hard.

Is this who Brady really is? A tone-deaf, bitter guy whose new life revolves around dining with new neighbors Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner while they giggle at avoiding state income tax? Stepping over the some 50% of small businesses lying in the street who applied for but were denied PPP assistance? A boastful buffoon who chews out his new teammates on the sideline week after week as they give the thousand-mile stare on the bench?

Call me crazy, I think the fans here wallowing in this Northeast - apparently unworthy for even Tom�s dead body - treated him pretty well over the years. If you consider worship and toe-licking good treatment, that is. Maybe Brady wanted more.

Yes, Brady is winning the 2020 football scoreboard vs. his old haunts, with Tompa Bay�s 8-5 and playoff-bound record dwarfing the Pats� 6-7 season of purgatory. That - and the reality that if Brady had stayed in Foxboro the Patriots record would be at least two-wins better - make every spiteful move Brady makes in paradise sting all the more.

Brady could have stayed and completed the race, tougher though the final few miles may have been. It would have been a real-life Hollywood script, a near-perfect run from obscurity to the penthouse, capped off with an arm-in-arm walk into the sunset of Brady�s twilight years alongside Robert Kraft, Bill Belichick and just about every man, woman and child from Millenocket to Middletown.

Instead, it�s devolved into a bizarre divorce with Brady in pewter taking jabs from the tropics.

Words matter, especially so from those considered family. So please, watch what you say as you �Viva a Vida,� Tom, from every Tom, Dick and Harry left here in the land of the miserable. Cheer up our blue Christmas and send us one of those new custom Brady license plates to remember you by. And every once in a while, maybe stop and think about those poor souls you�ve left behind and say something nice about your hard time spent back here in the graveyard.

# ¿ Dec 17, 2020 21:55

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

a neat cape posted:

He doesn't know any better yet so I will enjoy his youthful passion.

https://twitter.com/BoltVox/status/1339804582952648706?s=19

fun fact: this picture was taken 8 months ago

# ¿ Dec 18, 2020 17:34

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

As expected

https://twitter.com/ChrisBiderman/status/1339991848375316480?s=19

# ¿ Dec 18, 2020 18:56

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

HappyHippo posted:

This is interesting, because I've been working on something similar:

This is the first quarter of the week 9 Carolina/Kansas City game

This rules extremely hard

Edit:

I can't believe this was a decade ago, I am so old
https://twitter.com/FieldYates/status/1340280727774982146?s=19

Spoeank fucked around with this message at 17:43 on Dec 19, 2020

# ¿ Dec 19, 2020 17:09

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

The Saints can get to $5.7 million in cap space if they cut Drew Brees, Cam Jordan, Michael Thomas (post-June 1), Terron Armstead, Taysom Hill, Janoris Jenkins, Kwon Alexander, Ryan Ramczyk, Marson Lattimore, Emmanuel Sanders, David Onyemata, Nick Easton, Malcom Brown, Will Lutz, Thomas Morstead, Latavius Murray, and Josh Hill

# ¿ Dec 20, 2020 19:01

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

# ¿ Dec 21, 2020 01:05

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# ¿ May 19, 2024 11:14

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

Who's ready for some Boxing Day C.J. Beathard???

https://twitter.com/MaioccoNBCS/status/1341460184003006465

# ¿ Dec 22, 2020 20:24

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL Week 15 News/Views: Lamar Drops a Deuce & a Dime, all on Company Time.