[COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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meet girls at the store posted:

My office Open Bidened at 8:00 this morning with a celebratory staff breakfast. It�s now 11:39, somebody has tested positive, and they�re scrambling to do contact tracing for the breakfast party. Life comes at you fast.

lol

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 19:51

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 10:41

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Spoondick posted:

https://twitter.com/EricTopol/status/1427342828921769998?s=19

we regret to inform you max titers is a zionist

that, uh, that dose2 line :stonklol:

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 20:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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TheLemonOfIchabod posted:

remember when Joe biden told that little kid at the town hall that kids didn't die from Covid and she didn't need to worry about going back to school lmfao

gonna be egg on ol' joe's face if she dies

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 21:20

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Business Gorillas posted:

im back

WORK FROM HOME OPPORTUNITY

are YOU a goon who is dreading to have to go back to a lovely office during a loving pandemic?
do YOU or someone you know have a knot in their stomach because their psycho boss wants them back in the office and see their smile?
are YOU able to have an internet connection for 40 hours a week and able to read, talk, and not be a total shithead on the phone?
do YOU live in Ohio, Delaware, Utah, Arizona, or Illinois?

GOOD NEWS! WE'RE HIRING!
hi, my name is business gorillas and i want to do BUSINESS! my company is currently hiring for phone jockeys in a couple different departments. it's a basic customer service gig that pays $16.00/hr starting plus a signing bonus of up to $2,000 with full benefits, including education assistance. i'm not going to lie, the job is dull and unrewarding, but WHO CARES? i bet your current job is too!

if not wanting to die because your small business tyrant work-landlord keeps masks optional is right for you, send me a dm so we can talk!!!

worried about your resume? no problem! so long as you aren't a complete fuckup, i'll help you with your resume! even if you might be a complete fuckup, i'll still look at your resume and tell you to GET OUT OF MY FACE!!!!!

]WE LOSE ENOUGH OF OUR LIVES TO OUR WORK, GOON. THERE'S NO REASON TO LOSE YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF IT.

inquire within! my dm's are open!

i live in georgia

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 23:58

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Stereotype posted:

also lol @ us being right about the booster months ago. we're right about everything. there's going to be so many dead people

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

REPORT FROM A HEALTH ANALYTICS WORKER:

This thread was loving right about everything. Absolutely everything.

It is loving incredible to me that the dead gay comedy forum was better at predicting what was going to happen than the loving CDC.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 04:11

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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T-Paine posted:

lmao

what's even the point of not reporting on weekends, it makes numbers look worse with these huge spikes, not better

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 17:41

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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*heavy metal music playing*; Nap Ghost

Ordered some 7093s from pksafety.com on Saturday and they shipped yesterday, if anyone is looking for respirator sources. I got my 6000 series and some pancake filters from them last winter on a goon's recommendation (they were out of stock of the 7093s at the time)

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 02:16

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Business Gorillas posted:

At the rate we're going, we're gonna find out that all the anti-vaxxers are right and the vaccines are poison

We're gonna find out the antivaxxers are in the FDA

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 03:05

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Lamebot posted:

Finally someone framed this mess in a way I can understand.

libs are starting to notice that biden isn't actually doing anything lol

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 13:08

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Happy Noodle Boy posted:

Beginning to think we are doing this (killing the country) on purpose

Real Mean Queen posted:

Nobody in charge of anything is smart enough to want to do that

The purpose of a system is what it does

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 14:51

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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euphronius posted:

I’ve heard so many people irl say they don’t need a mask / vaccine because they are “naturally immune “ lamo

I'm unnaturally immune

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 15:43

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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*heavy metal music playing*; Nap Ghost

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 00:02

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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SpaceDrake posted:

I distinctly feel like they are not prepared for the problem of "100,00 actual dead children and the probable national psychosis that results"

i'm going insane already

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 04:00

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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fosborb posted:

the US is going to surpass peak hospitalizations.

I think most people don't realize how baked in that is at this point

we could literally vaccinate every single person in the US tomorrow and implement weld-your-door style lock downs indefinitely, and we're still going to slide right past the record and keep going

i';m definitely going insane right now

E:

turd in my singlet fucked around with this message at 04:13 on Aug 19, 2021

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 04:10

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Iverron posted:

sturgis lmao

yeah lol

i guess this wave will have a similar "burn across the country" pattern, but a lot faster and this time just starting from the gulf coast?

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 04:30

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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*heavy metal music playing*; Nap Ghost

All that chat about TB protocols from earlier got me thinking... now that our society has normalized ideas like "communicable diseases aren't real" and "quarantines and PPE are a violation of MUH HIPPO RIGHTS", any attempts to enforce the old TB rules are going to be met immediately with a horde of screaming chuds and eventually ruled unconstitutional by the supreme court

Tuberculosis is back baby!!!!!

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 15:51

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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RoboChrist 9000 posted:

~ELASTOMERIC ELITE ISSUES~
I still have some questions/concerns about the quality of my seal and if I'm doing everything right. I don't want to derail this thread much, plus it already moves fast and replies get lost. I wouldn't mind PMing someone if they're able and willing to help - because I have no one IRL I can turn to for this stuff - but I imagine I'm not the only one with concerns and questions.
Maybe we should have a thread for respirator chat and stuff? I feel like there's probably enough to justify it?

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 22:08

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Shifty Pony posted:

Some Texas hospitals are looking to prioritize vaccinated patients over unvaccinated patients if things get worse (which they will).

but wait you say, what about disproportionate rates of unvaccinated folks in disadvantaged groups? don't worry the doctors considered it:

oh wait the article continues a bit...

can't expect doctors to take five additional seconds to read something critically important, better to just gently caress over the usual groups yet again.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 22:10

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Schmoe Cwead posted:

took about an hour of searching but i finally found the most prescient tweet that has ever been twat

https://twitter.com/MichaelRCusack/status/1297839753811779584

are we predicting 2022 is going to be worse too? this pandemic seems to generally follow the pattern of the 1918 Flu and the second year was the worst of that from my understanding... can see delta burning through enough people this fall/winter that there won't be enough covid-naive people left for a real pandemic again

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 02:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Google Butt posted:

I have no reason to believe each year won't be worse than the last

tahts the general rule but next year doesn't have to be worse bc of covid specifically

(its probably gonna be the supply chain poo poo finally coming through imo)

# ¿ Aug 20, 2021 02:46

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Glumwheels posted:

I just I�ve the way the south is exploding out to the rest of the US with infection.

are we gonna get another wave out of sturgis like last year or is it gonna be drowned out by the big wave from the south

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 02:34

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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anyone got that story about transmission occurring across a hospital hallway bc the doors were open at the same time?

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 12:54

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Steve Yun posted:

it was a quarantine hotel

https://i.stuff.co.nz/national/health/coronavirus/300383287/covid19-delta-transmission-at-aucklands-jet-park-miq-hotel-via-opening-of-doors

thanks, no wonder i couldn't find it

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 13:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Substandard posted:

I paid in 2007 to join a comedy forum, and now I'm a communist with access to reliable COVID info.

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 15:58

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Helith posted:

lol he's aware that if they all die there's no one to vote for him in 2024

he's proud thaht he was the president when they were developed and approved and takes it personally that his fans don't like it

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 03:22

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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*heavy metal music playing*; Nap Ghost

i've got (chud) family in that thread-infamous green county in florida so i looked into it... it's only been green bc they report weekly and the covidactnow app got confused by that

yes they have >40% test positivity and <40% vaccination, why do you ask

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 03:25

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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spaceblancmange posted:

https://twitter.com/JAVdottxt/status/1429357245440139265

JAV titers

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 13:39

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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*heavy metal music playing*; Nap Ghost

https://thehill.com/policy/healthcare/568868-mississippi-covid-19-patients-who-refuse-to-self-isolate-could-face-fines

Mississippi COVID-19 patients who refuse to self-isolate could face fines, jail time

quote:

The state health officer for Mississippi issued a COVID-19 isolation order on Friday, telling people that if they test positive for COVID-19 and refuse to self-isolate, they could face fines or possible jail time.

In his isolation order, Mississippi State Health Officer Thomas Dobbs said that people have to isolate themselves at home once they become aware that they are infected. People are expected to remain home for 10 days after becoming ill or testing positive for COVID-19, regardless of whether they are fully vaccinated.

�A negative test for COVID-19 is not required to end isolation at the end of 10 days, but you must be fever free for at least 24 hours with improvement of other symptoms,� the order said.

The order stated that refusal to obey could include several fines or punishments. Someone who refuses to obey the order of a health official could receive a $500 fine, up to six months in jail or both. However, when a life-threatening disease is involved, the refusal to obey the order could include up to $5,000 in fines, five years of jail time or both.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 23:27

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Goobish posted:

And once again I'm thankful I can homeschool. I already called off my wedding and everyone is pissed lol. gently caress them though. Just dusted off my respirator. Turns out I had about a month window to get married (her family pressure for reception) but I missed it. No one else seems to pay attention to covid anymore. We'll get married in respirators. gently caress lib familu.

my sister got engaged in the middle of the fall surge last year and planned her wedding for October this year, on the hope covid would go away magically or something

my family in general has been better than i expected but still libbish, but this drat thing is still not cancelled and i'm kinda starting to get worried even September won't be enough for her to call it off

they're making lunch plans in a couple weeks for her fiance to meet our 80-year-old family friends, one of whom recovered from lung cancer a few years ago and is on oxygen. lmao

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 03:54

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Biowarfare posted:

what i dont understand is why people are so desperate to jam their children in viral incubators ??? is there something im missing? just some desperate need to pretend that it's all over? like even well educated people are acting like this and it's weird

the incubation to intubation pipeline

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 13:15

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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sosmeone posted this last night

Infection-enhancing anti-SARS-CoV-2 antibodies recognize both the original Wuhan/D614G strain and Delta variants. A potential risk for mass vaccination?

quote:

As the NTD is also targeted by neutralizing antibodies, our data suggest that the balance between neutralizing and facilitating antibodies in vaccinated individuals is in favor of neutralization for the original Wuhan/D614G strain. However, in the case of the Delta variant, neutralizing antibodies have a decreased affinity for the spike protein, whereas facilitating antibodies display a strikingly increased affinity. Thus, ADE may be a concern for people receiving vaccines based on the original Wuhan strain spike sequence (either mRNA or viral vectors).

despite the claims here the data is still pretty good for protection from hospitalization and death (tho may suggest why delta has more/more severe breakthroughs)

but lol now i'm thinking what if ADE is what defines the next variant. max titers.... titers of death

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 13:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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As the person who started the ADE derail, my point wasn't that the vaccine is dangerous now. I was just doomlolling at the idea that there's potential for variants with that problem

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 15:06

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Mr. Pizza posted:

another corsi cube Q:

Is the reason you can't just slap one furnace filter on the intake side of the fan due to drag/air resistance overloading the fan motor? Would be a lot smaller footprint that way.

The point of the cube is to increase airflow by increasing the surface area of the filter medium. Idk if a single filter would overload the motor but it would definitely move a lot less air through the filter

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 17:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Atrocious Joe posted:

please everyone fill out the poll about how you fee about China's lockdown policy and if you support the CPC
https://twitter.com/MichaelPSenger/status/1429840747260366851?s=20

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 18:44

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Schnorkles posted:

i tend to agree with the 'don't give vaccinations with serious immune response to young kids without really good data', but the solution where society can stomach that and just keep those kids as much out of harms way as possible isn't being allowed. if you're going to prevent young kids from being vaccinated for health reasons, you can't turn around and take a series of actions that puts them at potentially even greater risk.

not sure we're balancing the risk factors correctly here.

I wonder if something along the lines of the old "I need you to document specifically that you refused"* trick might be helpful here, so if your kid gets hosed up from covid there's a paper trail pointing to the doctor refusing to take preventative action

* the "please write this down in your notes, which I have no way of verifying" phrasing of this never made sense to me, but it's a common enough claim in disabled communities that this actually works to get docs to run tests

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 19:55

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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r/nursing is talking about medical collapse

https://www.reddit.com/r/nursing/comments/p9wrqu/what_would_a_medical_collapse_look_like/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

Comments are horrifying

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 22:46

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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tenderjerk posted:

Maybe don't put every goddamn thing behind a paywall, nyt

The NYT was started bc some rich psychopath was pissed the big New York newspaper at the time kept publishing editorials by Karl Marx, iirc. It's always been an agent of class warfare

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 17:02

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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is the "Don't talk to me til I've had my Ivermectin" coffee mug someone posted a ways back real? i kind of want one

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 15:42

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Lovelyn posted:

They're in so deep that it's part of their identity and they definitely do feel a sense of camaraderie with each other over this.

It's kind of generally understood in C-SPAM, but I'm surprised it isn't talked about more directly that a huge part of right-wing ideology is identity politics. For some reason that phrase only gets dragged out when complaining about liberals.

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 15:46

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 10:41

turd in my singlet: Jul 5, 2008; DO ALL DA WORK

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Death By The Blues posted:

One step closer to bodies being dumped in the everglades. I want Alligators chomping on chuds.

the gator variant

# ¿ Aug 25, 2021 15:47

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