(Thread IKs:
OwlFancier)
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Tedsville posted:Had to spend a full 10 minutes defrosting the car this morning. That's one massive microwave.
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Dec 1, 2023 11:40
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Pork Pie Hat posted:Stupid bastard leg. I have a small patch on the front of my left shin which 'triggers' that Im being touched there as if its a spider or insect crawling over it. Used to hate it a lot as a kid, and can ignore it at will now. But sometimes it wakes me up, instantly thinking there is something in the bed with me. happyhippy fucked around with this message at 15:01 on Dec 1, 2023 |
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Dec 1, 2023 14:56
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Pork Pie Hat posted:I’m glad you can ignore it at will now, because that sounds like a nightmare, I wonder what causes that? Some kind of vestigial early warning system? And in bed with you in a fun times way or in an AAAAARGH way? Thanks. Its not constant, and not a SUDDEN POKE like feeling, more that it was already there and is 'moving' across the skin. As a kid, it was more often, and it would catch me sometimes and I would look down and try to see what was on my leg, but usually I'd just scratch it with the other leg As for sleeping it can get me sometimes, confused sleepy freaking out something just walked over my legs. gently caress knows what causes it, nerve damage, brain wiring mixed up, aliens, take your pick.
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Dec 1, 2023 21:56
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That red zone in the pic above is the blood mist you get when you hit a kid. So if you want to mist a kid its best in a Cadillac.
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Dec 2, 2023 11:58
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When I take over, I'll alay all your fears and solve all crime and such by implanting mini-explosives at the base of everyone's neck. There will a free app where you can vote to trigger it at any time.
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Dec 2, 2023 15:23
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:and didn't Battle Royale have something similar? I can't check because I gave the book away to a charity shop last year. Yeah, same with the films Fortress and Wedlock. Wedlock is a personal fave, Rutger Hauer cheesy
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Dec 2, 2023 18:35
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Either the drink, he didn't lick the plate clean, or a piece of food dropped on the ground that he didn't notice. Or like that John Candy thing of not eating all the fat.
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Dec 2, 2023 21:54
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.....I'm on the restaurant's side. If its part of the challenge, it needs to be in your belly!
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Dec 2, 2023 22:01
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I'm a vegan. This £50 challenge gonna be a piece of piss!
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Dec 2, 2023 22:50
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killerwhat posted:Sprouts, broccoli, coriander, cucumber and celery are all good imo. I made braised celery recently, came out pretty nice. Celery simmered in garlic and stock. Was recently reading that Brussels Sprouts taste different now than a decade or two ago, they have bred out the slight bitter taste it used to have. Celery is great for a soup or stew as a filler that doesn't alter the taste much.
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Dec 3, 2023 11:45
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Nice to see you back func. And yeah, one sniff of money and families goto poo poo. My dad had a breakdown over relatives trying to gently caress us over in inheritances. gently caress them, take care of your own, smile and be nice to them, and watch them die alone.
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Dec 3, 2023 22:33
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JoylessJester posted:My pal enjoys telling the story from his grandparents funeral, when cousin's he hadn't seen in decades crawled out of the woodwork to rend their garments only to find out all the money was being split between the family member's who'd looked after her and a local charity. They didn't even bother to stay for the wake. My family did something similar but when the person was still alive. My grandmother had a really bad stroke, and while we were in the hospital they turned up and were 'clearing space for the wake' which involved moving all the expensive looking poo poo to their house. She survived for another half a year, and they 'helped again' for the wake with the rest disappearing never to be seen again. My grandfather was still alive at the time and sill there in the house.
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Dec 3, 2023 23:18
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The Donut posted:Was this Cruella's plan all along? Is Jenrick one of her true believers? Will she swoop in on a giant goose and seize the Iron Throne of Downing Street? Nah. Remember Jenrick is the guy who ordered the Disney murals be painted over so foreign kids remain fearful and unsafe in the UK. If its a Suellla's 10 dimensonal master plan, its not good getting one of your own to resign.
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Dec 6, 2023 20:57
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forkboy84 posted:I mean they can't kick the can down the road much longer, but another unelected PM during this parliament absolutely can happen. You're not thinking like a Tory. They don't see it as a poisoned chalice, unless they had an iota of care on how the country works. It's all about personal gain. And for some this is the last time they are within getting that next tier of grifting. The £8000 after dinner speeches, foreign investor invites to get your favour is some deal coming up, the amount of bribes from down the hierarchy desperate for an honor. Sure they'll be there for less than a year, another 5 after if they are lucky, but they get the pension, and book deal for doing gently caress all and blaming it on every one else. This is the last chance for Gove, Mogg, and a few others to get into no. 10.
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Dec 6, 2023 22:12
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:What was that portfolio thing students were supposed to collect 'for employers to see' in the 90s I think? It was after my time, but probably in the timescale of some of you on here. Records of Achievement. Started during my time just before doing GCSEs. Absolutely useless, still have mine and still has various teachers writing 'is ok but could do better' in different ways. And forever it shall be known that I am excellent at the recorder in year 2 of Music. Surprised that didn't get me into a 100k/yr job instantly. happyhippy fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Dec 15, 2023 |
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Dec 15, 2023 00:28
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Mebh posted:Yeah it's enraging and horrifying. Like... What's the end game? Do they just want to kill people irrespective of who they are? Because that's what it looks like. They were saying the endgame is the end of Hamas. 'Hamas' is anyone adult size not wearing IDF army gear.
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Dec 17, 2023 02:43
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forkboy84 posted:Still bummed that I bought myself some Ben & Jerrys, £5.20 for the tub, as a Christmas season treat, & it was fully liquid when I finally did get home. No Karamel Sutra for me When I order pizza I get a tub of B&J, and its usually liquid too. Baileys goes well into the cookies and cream version. killerwhat posted:I met this cat at the Satanic Flea Market recently in London, where it was wearing a Cyberdog (Cybercat?) jumper. It’s a good cat. Sigrid the cat! Would love to meet this cat.
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Dec 21, 2023 12:32
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Rappaport posted:This must be the equivalent of celebrating DooM's 30th First year of uni 1995. Needed a PC for my course. Saw an ad for a cheap one, contacted the guy, went to his house where he was selling them from his shed. He said he didn't have the 100Mhz one I wanted, but he will give me a 90Hz and throw in a few installed games. I took it, and one of those games was Doom. Holy gently caress.
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Dec 22, 2023 11:17
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Jaeluni Asjil posted:The important question of the day: No 'holding pint of beer' option. Sad.
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Dec 22, 2023 12:06
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Got a tub of Roses, Celebrations, and Quality Street. Roses is the best one. Celebrations is the worst. Quality Street is meh. And thank you for coming to my Tedtalk
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Dec 22, 2023 20:19
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kingturnip posted:I can only assume that Sunak has a bigger humiliation fetish than Truss, because otherwise why is he even still in the job? Hes only there to be the conduit for other millionaires and billionaires to get their oar in on any contract or knighthoods they can. Remember he was in the US talking with their healthcare and insurance corps while Truss was loving things up. He could be getting poo poo thrown in his face, but he knows hes getting a gravy train carriage the size of Westminster when he goes.
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Dec 22, 2023 21:24
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OwlFancier posted:Doesn't he have some books out? Remember seeing them when I did the book charts. Who doesn't have a book out in that line of work really.
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Dec 23, 2023 02:17
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Miftan posted:Nobody here is ever gonna top Necrothatcher's TV appearance Oh, what was that? Don't have any TV appearances personally, but knew a guy at school who was the angriest, bullied everyone, wrecked everything, drink, drugs, did everything you could think of. Left school the first chance he got. Next time saw him, was on Northern Ireland Question Time, part of Young Sinn Fein, wearing a green tweed jumper asking a question to the panel. Was if he found God or something.
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Dec 23, 2023 11:54
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Unless you are serving this upto hardcore anti-UKers, no one gives a gently caress what you eat alone at christmas mate.
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Dec 23, 2023 16:27
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Guavanaut posted:Not sure he's going to eat it though. Turn that fleg into poo poo!
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Dec 23, 2023 17:02
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Growth means 'I can hike up rent more'
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Dec 23, 2023 18:31
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O̵̠̻̘̖̗͕̞̮̟͇̠̲̼̥͓͉̙̿͊̆Ņ̴̨̜̱̫͔͚̱̦͖͇͒̈͋̓̈́͐͂͑̔̍͊͆̿̕E̸̛̟̜̬̘̟̝͔̞͖̒̌̈́̄̂͊͊͊͠ͅ ̷̧̞͙̟͂̑̔͆̉̽̂͋͆͌͝͠D̷̝̩̩̊̅̐̀̌͋̒͝A̶̡̳͕̮̩̬͈̦̯̟̞̬̥̋̍̓̋̈́̿͐̓͒̀͛͗Y̴͉͉͖͖̼͙̤̪̪̌̉̋̈́̏͒̉̋́̂̋͊̈́̓̈́͜ ̵̖̬̫͚͍̓̀̾̄͝U̸̧̼̞̪̜̦̯̺͐̃̔̑̅̀̌̍̾͒͂̄ͅN̶̛̲̬̦͓̙̘̩̞͉̠̝̞͇̤̝͍̓͌̇̄̈́̈́͒̈́͒̋̎͛̀̕͝͝T̶̨̢̨̝͚̦̤̮͎͎̙̯̩̗̩̜̝͂̈́̀̓̆̂͌̈͒̕̕̚̚Ȉ̴̩̮͉̗̱͙̓͒͝L̴̨̟̩̹̫̱̰̱̪͔̰̹̓͝ ̵̢̧̭̙̗͖̮͉̝͕̞͓͊̈́͜͜Š̵̥͚͇̹̠͌A̵̹̤̽̈́̂T̶̙͈̺͉͇̼̔͜Ạ̴̛̀͊̊͗͋͗̊̔̑͘N̶͓̲̠̙͛̈́̐̔̾̈́̿̍͗̕͝
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Dec 24, 2023 10:25
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Catzilla posted:I’ve seen this effect quite often. How do you do it, as I can’t find the right terms to search for it? Zalgo generator. Named after this:  Can't find the original Family Circus cartoons which had the text on them.
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Dec 24, 2023 12:30
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Private Eye still is good, does good things, it just hasn't modernizes its ways at all to . Back when it started a mere murmur of an ethics, moral, or criminal activity could sink a politician or company. Nowadays just ignore it or say back 'so what?'. They need to team up with Led By Donkeys and Stop Oil and do some protesting poo poo with the facts they find out.
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Dec 24, 2023 16:58
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Tedsville posted:For reals, I've had my Henry for 12 years now and dude still sucks with the best of them, all with a smile on his face. Things that sound really loving strange out of context.
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Dec 24, 2023 17:34
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kingturnip posted:I watched that Rebel Moon film on Netflix and it's one of the most weirdly-bland films I've watched in years. It was an actual Star Wars pitch film script from Synder that was rejected. It's what your mother says when they have Star Wars at home.
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Dec 26, 2023 02:23
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Two had strokes from what I heard. The third couldn't reach.
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Dec 26, 2023 18:59
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Trainee PornStar posted:I thought Chubby Brown's gimmick was that he was a characterisation of an old school 'working bloke', a bit 'holiday postcard' type of humour'? He's always been the Viz type working club bloke, but was Manning. But he has stopped doing the 'an english man, an irishman,...' jokes. Hes more 'COCK FANNY MINGE!' jokes, all sexually frustrated husband/wife style now.
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Dec 26, 2023 22:38
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Yeah, make some room for James Corden.
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Dec 28, 2023 11:35
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I remember University Challenge used to be a target of jokes in Northern Ireland back in the 70s and 80s, the joke being the questions were too 'mainland' based. Who was the King's butt cleaner in 1632? What happened during the annual cheese farting festival in Peckindale Upon Symth in 1854?
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Dec 28, 2023 17:23
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smellmycheese posted:My NI wife is going on The Chase next year and I’m concerned about her lack of knowledge on this sort of stuff, and Charles Dickens in particular, as they seem obsessed with questions like “which novel features Mrs Mingewicket and Sethington Pecksniff?” Ah good luck to her! How the gently caress does getting on those shows work anyway, just apply? Any prelim rounds to see if you are smart enough or anything?
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Dec 28, 2023 18:27
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Bury is THE most marginal seat in all of England, he only won it with 105 votes. So he knows hes not going to win it again, so doesn't give a poo poo. He's trying to get the next pay day, be it a few appearances on GBeebies or dinner speeches to gammons.
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Dec 29, 2023 12:05
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The local food bank must have told her to gently caress off.
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Dec 29, 2023 14:46
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It's even funnier when you know she works in the Department for Leveling Up. You want a livable wage and proper housing? After what we gave you, not one but TWO boxes of chocolate. I took time out of my holidays to get chauffeur driven to deliver those, and thats how you repay us. Ungrateful gets.
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Dec 29, 2023 17:37
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crispix posted:aunty beeb has detector vans for to detect when you haven't washed your willy properly!!!!!!!!!! Thats why there's a constant siren going off everywhere I go. Silent Hill style.
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Dec 29, 2023 20:21
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