Powaqoatse posted:

Smythe posted:

to take your insanely thin metaphor to its conclusion, imagine if all of your friends had sexy dominatrices who kicked you in the balls at their house, at the mall, in your and their cars, and your job. imagine if everywhere you went there were latex clad vixens pummeling your genitals until you wept for mercy and/or release from your CBT-5000 chastity iron maiden. imagine if your friends and family thot u were a hosed up weirdo for not wanting your balls brutally owned and to be spit on and called fag and stuff on a st andrews cross. thats the network effects ppl are worried about. in the first 2 decades of the new millennium it became normal to give all ur info to big companies and the nsa and u were left out and ostracized for not doing it. in the next decade it is shaping up to total surveillance and we're installing the panopticon ourselves.

Plorkyeran posted:

I once spent a few months ripping out a robust c# implementation of a thing to replace it with a ridiculous wrapper of the matlab prototype. Then I got the gently caress out of there.

Dog Jones posted:

gently caress you, I want to gently caress you up bitch. I've been working on replacing a huge complicated MATLAB piece of poo poo with c# for a loving YEAR at my current place. As soon as I read your post I did 200 push ups to prepare my body to kick the poo poo out of you, watch your back

PleasingFungus posted:

smythe is good

Buttflakes posted:

Oh holy gently caress, I feel you. The last time my sister visited me, she took a piss in the Dallas airport and the sound of some poor woman vomiting and making GBS threads out her soul was coming from a couple stalls down. She washed her hands and got the gently caress out of there as fast as she could, but 3 days into her visit everyone in my parents' house came down with the plague, including my 89yr old grandma.
There are only so many bathrooms in mom n' dad's place, so I found myself literally making GBS threads in the tub and barfing into the trash in the bathroom across from my older sister who was on the toilet screaming at god to just let her die already.
Rock n' roll, dude.

Ride The Gravitron posted:

Mr. Belding posted:

People are whiny babies and if you don't climb up their cock mouth first at the mention of hardship they feel like their lived experience has been somehow delegitimized.

Hizke posted:

[to the jaunty ragtime of a donkey kong country tune] my dad was diagnosed with and died of cancer

Barudak posted:

Is it weird my girlfriend constantly holds fake funerals for her where I must appease her every whim and which involves her co-opting memories I have of close relatives who did die or else she berates me and claims I don't care enough?

We just don't know dude, science has only come so far.

Edit: Like, come on dude, how are you even rationalizing this to yourself? I can't name a single story created by human beings this ridiculous and we invented a religion based around stitching a dead husbands penis back on.

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Josuke Higashikata

chernobyl kinsman posted:

i googled this and it is bar none the gayest poo poo i've ever seen

chernobyl kinsman posted:

i googled this and it is bar none the gayest poo poo i've ever seen

frankenfreak posted:

Imp Zone captures the essence of GDQ:

BJPaskoff posted:

The only thing that could make this quote more perfect is if it ended with "kill the animals".

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

pathological liar or pussy like a dead baby machinegun, take your pick

PostNouveau posted:

Your av gave me a seizure. You'll be hearing from my lawyers.

A misanthrope posted:

jokes on you, i dont have any money you can sue me for

Gorilla Salad posted:

I've got a greasemonkey script which lets me it into something much more bearable.

A misanthrope posted:

i am speechless

chernobyl kinsman posted:

i googled this and it is bar none the gayest poo poo i've ever seen

glam rock hamhock posted:

At least pissgate shouldn't hurt Trump with the GOP because they're all about the trickle down.

chernobyl kinsman posted:

i googled this and it is bar none the gayest poo poo i've ever seen

The MSJ posted:

Paladinus posted:

Many say that Trump's presidential programme was a bit bish bosh, but in fact it was all about posh pish.

Menstrual Show posted:

Donald likes piss,
Schmorky loves poo,
Close GBS,
And D&D too.

Alhazred posted:

One spy was caught because he didn't know that landlords weren't allowed to serve alcohol before lunchtime. Another was caught because he had german sausages in his suitcase.

canyoneer posted:

Getting caught was his wurst case scenario

Topographic Nap posted:

I bring a pocket knife and usually just sample one in the store and if its ripe pick the mango that looks closest to it. I pick out bags of Oreos the same way.

mostlygray posted:

This is silly. We're fatter because we have food. Our Grandparents didn't have enough protein and fat to get tubby. Yes, there are people that are fat because they eat too much and don't move. I do not disagree with that.

The managing cleaner at our office is from Egypt. She always says, "fat is good". She's right. Due to stress and a stomach disorder, I lost 35 lbs in one month. I had excess fat that let me not die. I was 6' 260, definitely too fat. But the fat reserve saved me.

If I was 170 lbs, I would have possibly died. My brother has been hospitalized several times for minor stomach bugs. But I'm fine. I can not eat for a week and stay alive. My brother has to have IV fluids if he gets very sick. I just have to lay down and rest.

Running stairs is good exercise for your heart, but the elevator isn't making you fat. "Fat as gently caress" is a different condition. I've worked with a man that couldn't even walk 100 feet. He'd have to take a break. But he ate normal amounts of food. I'm familiar with super-obese people. I knew another guy who ate the better part of a cow for lunch and ate pork rinds as a snack. I hope that the first one survived. I know the second is still around. He decided to take care of himself.

axolotl farmer posted:

amount I paid for tuition at Stockholm U: 0 SEKs

Cat Face Joe posted:

0 SEKs

also descriptive of ur college career

Ride The Gravitron posted:

RandomFerret posted:

lol if you don't jab a knife right into the center of every package you buy like you're making a drug deal in an 80s movie

gotta stick your finger in there and lick it so you can nod and say "it's good" before you put it in the cart

Outrail posted:

Something something dating, purchasing pets/prostitutes etc.

Subjunctive posted:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who couldn't find something funny to say about that post.

Subjunctive posted:

I'm glad I'm not the only one who couldn't find something funny to say about that post.

slinkimalinki posted:

Guess the thread.

freeedr posted:

Or ever

slinkimalinki posted:

Guess the thread.

SuperMechagodzilla posted:

People keep trying to elevate Trump into the ultimate evil, when he's really just a Nute Gunray idiot clown sort of character.

Liberals think America is reliving the plot of The Force Awakens, and they're all Poe Damerons - cruising through cyberspace, sniping neonazis on twitter.

"Where there's light there's hope!"

It's like no, sorry; America's reliving the plot of The Phantom Menace, and you're Sio Bibble.

The MSJ posted:

Breetai posted:

I have never been prouder to be baffled by an analogy.