Post itt every time you lol that trump is president

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > Post itt every time you lol that trump is president

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

Aesop Poprock posted:

it is a reference to the show married with children where al bundy famously denies his hot wife sex for some reason

but i wasn't turning down your balls i was talking about the gross penis skin wound healing. I would totally suck your balls and dick if they're decent

asl?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:22

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# ? May 12, 2024 22:30

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

ElGroucho posted:

We already posted this, right?

LOL

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:23

Smirr: Jun 28, 2012

ElGroucho posted:

We already posted this, right?

LOL

nope, and lmao

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:24

Regrettable: Jan 5, 2010

ElGroucho posted:

We already posted this, right?

LOL

lol

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:27

Kumo: Jul 31, 2004

Drunk & Ugly posted:

https://twitter.com/MattGertz/statu...4b02a8434b6575a

lol

Jesus loving Christ. The incident he describes literally happened in Baltimore with Freddie Gray. Police put/ threw him in a paddy wagon & his spine was severed en route to the police station.

Every city official & police chief should be making GBS threads bricks over this because while police officers are very rarely held to account in criminal trials, in civil trials they do tend to prevail- which means millions paid out to the families.

Monday morning police officers are going to be treated to a refresher in due process rights of criminal suspects all across the country at their daily briefings.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:29

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

scrubs season six posted:

asl?

pm me with circumcision deets

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:32

ruddiger: Jun 3, 2004

Three Olives posted:

Oh good, here is a bunch of police officers cheering the president suggesting there should be more police brutality against suspects.

https://twitter.com/davidmackau/status/891004517017415685

WTF is this world we are living in?

Someone should ask him how his campaign promise of cleaning up in Chicago in a week is going.

http://chicago.suntimes.com/news/cicero-cop-shooting-tied-to-gun-chicago-p-d-should-have-destroyed/

quote:

Cicero cop shooting tied to gun Chicago P.D. should have destroyed

Thirteen years ago, William Stewart Boyd, a Cook County judge, drove to a South Side church to turn in a handgun his late father had owned.

The Chicago Police Department was accepting guns as part of a buyback program meant to take weapons off the streets and help make the city safer.

Boyd, who hears domestic relations cases, brought them his father�s .38-caliber Smith & Wesson revolver, serial number J515268. He remembers handing it to plainclothes officers who wore their badges and service weapons on their belts. Under the buyback program, they, in turn, gave him a prepaid Visa card. It was for less than $100.

The police recover thousands of guns every year, many of them through buyback programs like this, as well as by confiscating weapons seized during arrests � more than 5,000 guns so far this year alone.

The guns are supposed to be destroyed. But the gun Judge Boyd took in somehow wasn�t. Instead, it turned up eight years later next to the body of a young man who was shot to death by a Cicero police officer.

The cop � Officer Donald Garrity, who, records show, had a history of discipline problems � is now out of the suburban department and collecting a disability pension as a result of post-traumatic stress he blames on the shooting.

How did a gun Chicago cops were supposed to have kept in a locked custody room and then destroyed end up all of those years later at the scene of a police shooting in Cicero, on a patch of pavement next to the body of a 22-year-old Latin Counts gang member named Cesar A. Munive?

That�s something that Boyd, a judge for nearly 20 years, would like to know.
�I�m doing the right thing,� he says, �and, in the process, someone didn�t do what they were supposed to do. That calls into question the process. What�s happening after you turn these weapons in?�

Police departments in Harvey, Elmwood Park and Dolton all have had guns vanish in recent years. And long before Boyd�s gun disappeared, a city audit found that the Chicago Police Department lost track of more than 130 guns that were stored at an evidence warehouse in the 1990s. Four of those later were seized during arrests.

Now, the Chicago department has opened an internal affairs investigation into how the judge�s revolver ended up in Cicero � something police spokesman Anthony Guglielmi calls �extremely abnormal and troublesome.�

After being informed by a reporter where the gun ended up, Guglielmi says: �We are opening an internal affairs investigation today to trace this gun, verify that it was taken into police custody during a turn-in and investigate how it possibly ended up back on the street.�

Whatever happened to keep the gun from being destroyed, Munive�s family members believe they know how it ended up next to his body. It was planted there by Cicero police to cover up an unjustified shooting by a cop of an unarmed man, according to a civil rights lawsuit the family filed in federal court.

Now, after five years of litigation, Cicero officials are poised to pay the family $3.5 million to settle their case. The Cicero Town Council agreed earlier this month to approve the settlement and is expected to take a final vote soon.

Jon Loevy, the Munive family�s attorney, questions how the Chicago police could have allowed the gun Boyd turned in to have escaped destruction.

�Our guy is dead, we can�t ask him,� Loevy says of the gun. �But we do know it was last seen in the possession of law enforcement.�

Though the town of Cicero is settling the case, officials have denied in court filings that the police used the gun as a �throwdown� to justify shooting Munive.

Garrity, the now-former Cicero cop who shot him, didn�t respond to interview requests. Nor did an officer who was there with Garrity that day in July 2012.

Lawyer Craig Tobin: Cop didn�t plant gun.

Garrity�s lawyer, Craig Tobin, says Munive got the gun from another member of the Latin Counts gang and that his client didn�t plant it.

The revolver�s long journey began 40 years ago. That�s when Boyd bought it for his father. He wanted him to feel safer, the judge said in a June 29 affidavit in the federal case.

Many years later, after his father had died, Boyd turned in the gun.

It took quite some time before the judge found out it wasn�t destroyed.

Munive � who had a rap sheet that included convictions for battery, sexual abuse of a minor and unlawful use of a weapon � was shot dead by Garrity in a residential neighborhood on July 5, 2012, records show.

Garrity and another Cicero cop told investigators later that they had responded in separate patrol cars to reports of a gang fight and saw Munive riding away on a bicycle. Garrity said he got out of his squad car and ran after Munive, catching up with him at the northeast corner of 13th Street and South 57th Avenue, according to police reports.

Garrity told investigators he saw Munive aim the gun at the windshield of a white, unmarked police car being driven by the other officer, Dominic Schullo. Garrity said he ordered the young man to drop the gun, and Munive didn�t, so he shot him.

Days after the shooting, Schullo told the Illinois State Police � which routinely investigates police-involved shootings in suburban Cook County � he was �staring straight down the barrel of the handgun� he said Munive was holding in his left hand.

Separately, Schullo told his own department: �He was gonna shoot me through the window. If it wasn�t for Garrity, he would have shot me right through the glass.�

The Cook County medical examiner�s office found that Munive was killed by a gunshot wound to the back. The bullet Garrity fired pierced Munive�s right lung, his autopsy found. He struggled to breathe and complained to police that �it burns,� records show.

It was nearly two years after Munive�s death that the Illinois State Police asked the federal Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives to trace the gun. The trace identified the judge as having bought it from an Oak Lawn gun dealer in 1977.

Boyd says no one from the police contacted him about the gun, though. He says he learned what happened when he was contacted by private investigators and attorneys on both sides of the lawsuit.

The Illinois State Police and Cicero each says it was the other�s responsibility to get the gun traced. But that didn�t matter anyway because Munive had it, according to Matt Boerwinkle, a state police spokesman, who says his agency stands by its findings that Munive pointed the gun at Garrity before being shot.

�Anybody could allege anything after the fact and file a lawsuit,� Boerwinkle says of the allegations the gun was planted near Munive�s body by police.

Based on the state police findings, the Cook County state�s attorney�s office closed its review of the shooting with a letter that read in part: �We have completed our review of the matter and found no conduct by the officer which would give rise to criminal charges.�

After the shooting, Garrity was promoted from patrol officer to detective.

He left the police department a little over two years ago after developing PTSD, according to Jerry Marzullo, the attorney for Cicero�s Police Pension Board.

Garrity was making $84,707 a year when he left the department � nearly $27,000 more than he made as a patrol officer. That higher pay boosted his yearly disability payments to $55,000.

Cicero Town Attorney Mike Del Galdo says Garrity went on disability after sworn, pretrial depositions in the lawsuit revealed he had omitted key facts about his work history when he first applied for a job with the Cicero police. Garrity had resigned as a Berwyn cop in May 2008 after being arrested by North Riverside officers who pursued him as he sped down Cermak Road in his personal car, records show.

Records also show that, while still with the Berwyn police, Garrity was once investigated for violating orders by wielding a high-powered rifle during a felony traffic stop.

�This police officer should not have been a police officer,� says Loevy, the Munive family attorney. �They are going to pay a substantial settlement as a result of this . . . shooting.�

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:34

Bob NewSCART: Feb 1, 2012; Outstanding afternoon. "I've often said there's nothing better for the inside of a man than the outside of a horse."

Kumo posted:

Jesus loving Christ. The incident he describes literally happened in Baltimore with Freddie Gray. Police put/ threw him in a paddy wagon & his spine was severed en route to the police station.

Every city official & police chief should be making GBS threads bricks over this because while police officers are very rarely held to account in criminal trials, in civil trials they do tend to prevail- which means millions paid out to the families.

Monday morning police officers are going to be treated to a refresher in due process rights of criminal suspects all across the country at their daily briefings.

Lmao if you think that an innocent person isn't getting killed on Monday and then acquitted. It's the last thing me or probably anyone else (at least in this thread) wants but I would loving put money on it. You can't spew poo poo like that to a bunch of dumb loving morons(cops) and expect them to not do something stupid lol. He basically just gave them a pat on the back and said no, what you've been doing is fine, just do it even worse now.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:34

ElGroucho: Nov 1, 2005; We already - What about sticking our middle fingers up... That was insane; Fun Shoe

Smirr posted:

nope, and lmao

Stolen from the gif thread, btw

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:35

Drunk & Ugly: Feb 10, 2003; GIMME GIMME GIMME, DON'T ASK WHAT FOR

Aesop Poprock posted:

pm me with circumcision deets

how quickly we move on,,, ans forget our promises

slut

Bob NewSCART posted:

He basically just gave them a pat on the back and said no, what you've been doing is fine, just do it even worse now.

that and catering to the reactionary conservative crowd who enjoy phrases like "just kill em and save the tax money" or "why dont we just turn the whole desert into glass" . I love how ppl are always excited to share that supercool science fact from the 6th grade

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:42

Dial-a-Dog: May 22, 2001

ruddiger posted:

Someone should ask him how his campaign promise of cleaning up in Chicago in a week is going.

http://chicago.suntimes.com/news/cicero-cop-shooting-tied-to-gun-chicago-p-d-should-have-destroyed/

this is the first i've heard of this shooting, so that cop killed this kid and dropped the gun right

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:43

Egbert Souse: Nov 6, 2008

Hey it's ok when we kill, maim, and torture because WE are the morally superior ones.

We

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:44

ROFL Octopus: Jun 20, 2014; LET ME EXPLAIN

Three Olives posted:

https://twitter.com/W7VOA/status/891003730761568256

President says cops should treat suspects worse. Cool, cool. Everything is good.

Why can someone say "cops good, criminals bad" and get the support of half the country.

My own mother things it's wrong to criticize the police :cripes:

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:44

happyhippy: Feb 21, 2005; Playing games, watching movies, owning goons. 'sup; Pillbug

NotWearingPants posted:

We probably won't have to wait that long before Hindus and Sikhs start getting shot for being Muslim.

Peuto Ricans and Hawaiian's look Mohammad-y as well.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:48

Egbert Souse: Nov 6, 2008

Son, I know you're a serial killer, but I love you so much that I won't do anything about it.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 20:53

moosetoucher: Jul 11, 2017; heck. heckin heck.

https://twitter.com/nowthisnews/status/890945961878409216

lol

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:05

Heffer: May 1, 2003

Dial-a-Dog posted:

this is the first i've heard of this shooting, so that cop killed this kid and dropped the gun right

Either:
1) cops are so incompetent that someone stole the gun from them
2) cops themselves sold the gun to criminals
3) the cop in the shooting kept a "throwdown" weapon he got from storage just in case he felt like shooting someone

Also either there was a serious stroke of luck and the only time it happened it was for a gun brought in by a judge, or its happened many times and this is the first we're hearing of it.

FFS cops, if you're going to be dirty at least be competent and keep an untracable gun on hand. Show some pride in your corrupt work.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:06

Aesop Poprock: Oct 21, 2008; Grimey Drawer

Drunk & Ugly posted:

how quickly we move on,,, ans forget our promises

slut

I learned my game from trump playa

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:10

ambient robot: Apr 23, 2014; by Lowtax

moosetoucher posted:

https://twitter.com/nowthisnews/status/890945961878409216

lol

Did he answer the question tho

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:16

moosetoucher: Jul 11, 2017; heck. heckin heck.

ambient robot posted:

Did he answer the question tho

He eventually said that they had responded, which from my understanding, they had not.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:18

Three Olives: Apr 10, 2005; Don't forget Hitler's contributions to medicine.

moosetoucher posted:

https://twitter.com/nowthisnews/status/890945961878409216

lol

Similar thing happened with Lisa Murkowski and the Secretary of the Interior.. Trump has staffed his administration with such ignorant fools that they think they can go after high ranking committee members and not realize that they very much have the power to make their lives living hells.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:21

Regrettable: Jan 5, 2010

moosetoucher posted:

https://twitter.com/nowthisnews/status/890945961878409216

lol

That is pathetic. He immediately tries to nestle his nose right up in her rear end to avoid answering.

moosetoucher posted:

He eventually said that they had responded, which from my understanding, they had not.

lol

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:23

Egbert Souse: Nov 6, 2008

I wish they could just say "Just answer the loving goddamn question, you shitheel"

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:26

Flesh Forge: Jan 31, 2011; LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

Don't forget how the Chairman makes her repeat the request to reclaim her time over and over before he actually stops picking his nose and intercedes lol

So blatant

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:30

Owlbear Camus: Jan 3, 2013; Maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:33

Coco Rodreguiz: Jan 12, 2007; Peckerhead isn't used enough as an insult if you ask me.

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

HMBOL

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:35

Chinatown: Sep 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy; Fun Shoe

dying

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:35

Flesh Forge: Jan 31, 2011; LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

It's about time for the weekend golf expedition isn't it?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:36

Bacon Taco: Jun 8, 2006; Now with extra narwhal meat!
HAIKOOLIGAN; Dinosaur Gum

Kumo posted:

Monday morning police officers are going to be treated to a refresher in due process rights of criminal suspects all across the country at their daily briefings.

This is a hearty :hmbol:

Do you honestly believe that in TTYOOL 2017 in these United States of America that cops give half a poo poo about due process rights, much less receive briefings about them?

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:38

Robo Reagan: Feb 12, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

Plavski posted:

from a while back

tbf if my dad had enough clout to make it so i can have unlimited jet fighters and fuckups in the jet fighters id abuse the system too

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:39

nooneofconsequence: Oct 30, 2012; she had tiny Italian boobs.
Well that's my story.

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

poor Melania wanted to do the same thing but she's in too deep

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:40

Catastrophe: Oct 5, 2007; Committed to burn twice as long and half as bright

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

OH MY GOD

Today is a great day.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:41

sugar free jazz: Mar 5, 2008

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

Lmaooooo

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:41

plain blue jacket: Jan 13, 2014; IT DOESN'T STOP
IT NEVER STOPS

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

Bannon's self sucking revelation claims its first victim.

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:42

poisonpill: Nov 8, 2009; The only way to get huge fast is to insult a passing witch and hope she curses you with Beast-strength.

https://youtu.be/h4UqMyldS7Q

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:45

Regrettable: Jan 5, 2010

Robo Reagan posted:

tbf if my dad had enough clout to make it so i can have unlimited jet fighters and fuckups in the jet fighters id abuse the system too

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:45

TotalLossBrain: Oct 20, 2010; Hier graben!

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

https://twitter.com/KrangTNelson/status/891036120573726720

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:47

Former DILF: Jul 13, 2017

TotalLossBrain posted:

https://twitter.com/KrangTNelson/status/891036120573726720

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:50

Chumbawumba4ever97: Dec 31, 2000; by Fluffdaddy

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/890971233159962624

https://twitter.com/W7VOA/status/891000801132503041

the mean streets of Long Island lmao

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:52

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# ? May 12, 2024 22:30

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Pac-Manioc Root posted:

welp late afternoon on a friday time to close up the lol shop until nex---

https://twitter.com/PageSix/status/...er%3D302%23pti2

oh

Oh please make it a dirty laundry type divorce

# ? Jul 28, 2017 21:52

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