/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Theophany posted:

Strap in, boys and girls!

My (25F) boyfriend (50M) decided that it was against Jesus to have sex anymore 5 weeks after I had our son.

Mental illness is a hell of a thing.

Paul was pretty sex-negative and he got the whole thing rolling. Lol at super religious dude refusing to read the Bible and relying on YouTube for spiritual guidance. Then again, actually reading the Bible, with proper context and commentaries etc., is a pretty good way to become an atheist.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 16:44

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# ? May 14, 2024 06:21

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I was wondering if his dick stopped working and he's using Jesus as an excuse to hide it.

That�s my guess.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 16:44

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I was wondering if his dick stopped working and he's using Jesus as an excuse to hide it.

Yeah that is the first thing I thought of :shrug:

# ? Aug 16, 2018 16:48

Xenocides: Jan 14, 2008; This world looks very scary....

I need to call my parents and tell them I love them and thank them for everything they did and did not do.

Long but I found it to be a fascinating tale of horror.

quote:

Am I [31M] justified in wanting to sever contact with my parents [55M/F] over their insane shenanigans involving long-term abuse, swinging, BDSM, divorce, and pathological lying?
u/throw_family_away
More detailed story is below. TL;DR: father is abusive; mother lies to abate his abuse; empty-nest swinging drives a wedge into their marriage; mixed messages during their separation reveals that both of them lie; my sister and I are not sure who to believe; for the next year, my mother gas-lights me by completely fabricating a story in which she is the innocent victim; last week, the lies finally became too ridiculous to believe anymore; after confronting her with hard evidence, she still denies it.

All I wanted throughout their separation was not to have to dig into details of their sex life. Instead I'm regaled with story after story about my mother's swinging antics, asked to review a BDSM video to determine whether it's my mother and whether the description is accurate (I didn't watch it), asked to review picture of a family reunion to determine whether my mother and her new boyfriend were engaged in inappropriate sexual behavior (she was), asked to look at BDSM pictures on the Internet to determine whether she was in them ... and more, and more, and more. I have repeatedly tried to set boundaries, saying that this is not appropriate for a parent/child relationship, and it doesn't work -- the next sentence will be some gratuitous sexual detail that I have no loving interest in knowing.

Another thing I'm tired about is being lied to. My mother called me to ask for advice about situations that she had fabricated. I took them at face value and tried to provide advice. People ended up getting hurt as a result of that advice, and I would never have given that advice if I knew what the real situation was. I still feel ashamed despite the victim forgiving me.

And apart from being tired of my mother's sex life and lies, my father's still an abusive narcissist with zero self-awareness of how his actions impact others, and a belief that his behaviors are innate and cannot be changed (and consequently, he will never change). We've butt heads several times and it is clear that he does not believe that beating and screaming at your children for their entire childhood constitutes abuse. I have been diagnosed with complex PTSD as a result of all of that. I lived in fear my entire childhood, and it still impacts the way I interact with the world.

Am I justified in wanting to flush my relationships with both of these people down the toilet? Here's a very short version of the story.

Very abbreviated story
My father was verbally and physically abusive toward everyone in the family; he didn't hit my mother like he did me, but he did physically intimidate her. Mom is very anxious and developed a tendency to lie in order to protect herself and her kids from him. In 2009, with an empty nest, they started swinging (my sister and I found out accidentally and did not tell them). This lasted for five years, until, in the wake of a lost job, my mother started using it to boost her self-esteem. My father says she became addicted to it, broke all of the rules, and started to engage in dangerous activities. Dad lost his patience, screamed at her to stop. Instead, she moved in with her final swinging partner, Bruce (though for months she lied and said she was living alone). Dad calls the kids with tales of mom's BDSM-addicted depravity, poses the situation as being dangerous to her life, and tries to cajole us into telling mom to go back home. Mom denies it, says she can't believe dad would make up such vicious lies about her, and that she left because he was abusive. Unsure who to believe, I eventually called my dad's bluff on one of his stories in a major way, and so I decided that he must be lying.

Over time, mom's story about her living situation changes from "alone" to "with a friend"; since she doesn't have any friends, I figure it must be someone from swinging. I am eventually vindicated when Bruce is revealed as the friend, but I let her off the hook because I figured she was embarrassed to admit she'd left dad for another man, as opposed to just leaving because he was abusive. In the meantime, mom does actually seem to be healing from the years of my father's abuse; she is less anxious, more social, and interacts with the world more. I confront dad about his abusive behavior over the years, which opens his eyes; his time in therapy is short-lived, however.

For the next year, things are mostly quiet. This June, Dad claims that mom has been telling him that she's going to get back together with him any day now; mom says she has never said any such thing, that she barely talks to him, and that he is delusional. Dad stalks mom, finds her address, and shows up twice. Mom changes her cell phone number and moves, and tells me that she's initiating divorce proceedings.

This September, mom and Bruce show up on my door (across the country) with a curious story about how they had been to my mom's sister's family get-together, had been doing nothing wrong, and that my aunt, after they left, had -- out of nowhere -- admonished my mother for engaging in sexually-inappropriate behavior (groping and biting) in front of her children. Mom is shocked by these allegations, says they are completely untrue, and that my aunt must be a racist (Bruce is black). While vising me, they go out one evening to The Armory in San Francisco, which is apparently a hard-core BDSM dungeon owned by kink.com. I've never heard of the place; mom starts telling me about it; when I get the picture, I change the subject. Shortly after this, my father and I have a falling-out over email regarding him having stolen my college scholarship; we don't speak for a while.

After they leave, my aunt calls me to tell me what happened at the family reunion. On the first night, Bruce sexually propositioned her, wanted to have a threesome, and was in her personal space. Later, she says, Bruce was groping my mother in a family situation, and that her children asked her why Bruce was biting my mother on the breasts. I was skeptical, but she sent evidence: pictures of groping taking place (obvious, blatant, intentional, not accidental), and text messages from mom admitting to the biting. Mom may or may not have been wearing a bondage collar at the family reunion. At this point, I really do not want to be involved with this situation, and try to get her and my aunt to talk. That doesn't happen.

In October, mom calls me to say that dad has shown up uninvited again and that he is angrily pressuring her to get back together with him. She has stepped out of the hotel room to ask me for advice on what to do. I told her that that behavior was illegal stalking and harassment, and disrespectful beyond that. She does not rejoin him at the hotel. Next week, mom calls me with an emergency; dad is threatening to kill himself, making menacing comments, and also threatening to take her pets to the shelter where they will surely be euthanized. I advise mom that dad is in that twilight state of "danger to oneself and others", and that she should take the police and state psychiatric evaluators with her to get her cats. She does.

The house of lies falls apart
Last week, Bruce called me saying that mom has packed her stuff up and left. I text mom to ask what's up, and she tells me that she is on a "job interview", that Bruce is being paranoid and controlling (I hadn't even mentioned Bruce). It is obvious that she is lying: you do not need to pack up all of your stuff when you go to a job interview. I point this out to her and she stops responding.

I call my sister, who has been in contact with my father. First, she mentions that she found pictures of BDSM porn featuring my mother on the Internet. She also says she saw the emails where my mother consented to my father coming up to visit her -- i.e., those incidents were not stalking. She says she has seen emails where my mother has repeatedly stated that she is in the car driving to move back in with my father. My mother sent these emails every day for the month leading up to his fit involving the cats. Also, that my father had offered to take the cats up to my grandmother's house, and was not simply going to euthanize them, and that there was no menacing content to his email about the cats. At this point I realize that I was complicit in the police being called on my father for unjustified reasons, which very much contradicts my live-and-let-live, not-petty, not-vindictive nature, and makes me feel terrible.

Also puzzlingly, my mother and father are back together as of now. And my mother told my father not to accept any phone calls from me, because she needs to be the one to talk to me. I.e., she needs time to manipulate the truth before I can talk to my father and find out what really happened.

On Saturday, my mother sent me a cryptic and self-deprecating email saying she has made many mistakes, and asks me for advice. I tell her that I am not going to provide her with advice anymore, because I need to have an accurate understanding of what the situation actually is before I'm comfortable doing that. Then I asked a series of questions that I already knew the answer to -- and I said that I already had the answer to them, so just tell the truth.

Were you actually on a job interview last Monday?
Was Aunt Sue right about what happened at the family reunion?
Did you invite dad up to see you on those times that you told me he showed up uninvited and was stalking you?
Did you repeatedly send dad emails saying you were in the car driving to get back together with him, but tell me that you weren't in contact with him at all, that he was obsessive and delusional for thinking these things?
Are you involved with Internet pornography?
I have evidence that the answer to all of these questions is "yes", and I told her that before asking the questions. She vehemently denied all of them! After I told her I had evidence!!!

Yesterday, I called my father up to collect additional evidence to confront my mother with; he forwarded me about 20 emails, all of them perfectly corroborating his side of the story and constituting hard evidence that she lied. After about an hour, the conversation suddenly took an ugly turn and we started screaming at one another. My intention with the phone call had been to stick to facts, but it didn't work out that way. He attacked me in very personal ways, identically to the sort of verbal abuse I suffered regularly in childhood. He was of the opinion that physical abuse is good and builds character. I give up. The phone call lasted five hours and fifteen minutes.

I woke up today, and I felt bad. My parents are hopeless and loving insane. Their drama reminds me of high school. I am more mature than both of them. Nobody has benefitted in any way from my being involved with their separation proceedings. In fact, my life has suffered as a result of my involvement. I tried to put distance between myself and the situation, but they do not respect boundaries. I didn't sign up for any of this. And I realize I can unsubscribe by pulling the plug on our relationships.

Am I justified?

And my favorite comment:

quote:

Never before have I read a thread where putting your fingers in your ears and yelling "lallalalalalalaaaalallaaaaalaaa" at the top of your lungs is the best response.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 16:58

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Xenocides posted:

I need to call my parents and tell them I love them and thank them for everything they did and did not do.

Long but I found it to be a fascinating tale of horror.

And my favorite comment:

Parents crazy so what

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:10

Barudak: May 7, 2007

How much money do your parents have that you keep picking up the phone?

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:22

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Xenocides posted:

I need to call my parents and tell them I love them and thank them for everything they did and did not do.

Long but I found it to be a fascinating tale of horror.

And my favorite comment:

Wow. I'm glad my parents hate each other the old fashioned way

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:32

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Barudak posted:

How much money do your parents have that you keep picking up the phone?

that number is a new and powerful indicator of the perceived strength of the us economy

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:40

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Pick posted:

that number is a new and powerful indicator of the perceived strength of the us economy

Excuse me, I have a nobel prize to win and not credit a woman for

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:46

Ziv Zulander: Mar 24, 2017; ZZ for short

tactlessbastard posted:

Wow. I'm glad my parents hate each other the old fashioned way

God, shut the gently caress up, pi-

oh.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 17:54

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Barudak posted:

Excuse me, I have a nobel prize to win and not credit a woman for

wow you really did go to the university of chicago

# ? Aug 16, 2018 18:15

Mordiceius: Nov 10, 2007; If you think calling me names is gonna get a rise out me, think again. I like my life as an idiot!

Xenocides posted:

Emotional cheating is okay right?

I really think she missed the point of the Arthur-Lancelot-Guinevere thing if she is not expecting everything to burn down around her.

I also think she needs to look up what platonic means. It is not just a lack of sex, it is a lack of romance.

commenter posted:

yes your situation really is magical! and unique!

if you decide to fill your BF in on what you've been up to the magic forest, be sure to use this line: My relationship with S doesn't affect my relationship with my boyfriend-- if anything, it only make me love my boyfriend more. that should go over well.

OP posted:

I'm sorry you took it that way. It is true. It doesn't affect my relationship with boyfriend. I'm still in love with one of my ex, and that love never affected my relationship with my boyfriend either, or the way I love him.

I didn't know what an emotional affair was before the answers... I don't browse /r/relationships , I wasn't aware that it was a thing. Where I live no one talks about that. Of course I'm unfaithful to my partner because I didn't tell him yet what happened, I'm holding things from him. But I will tell im that I just fall in love with people, will probably do it again; and when I fall in love, it doesn't chase away the feelings I have for him, or for anyone else that I love. He knows I'm still in love with my ex, in a different way, but it's still romantic love, and he doesn't mind. I don't know how he will feel about another person loving me back though... I'll give you an update after I talk with him.

But hey, we are not all made the same ! I can understand that someone can only truly love one person at the same time and I respect that. I'm just not that way...

I red the emotional affair wikipedia page, and nothing rings a bell for me.

"A relationship between a person and someone other than (their) spouse (or lover) that has an impact on the level of intimacy, emotional distance and overall dynamic balance in the marriage. The role of an affair is to create emotional distance in the marriage."

this isn't what I'm feeling at all.

And after, in the characteristics... I don't have innapropriate intimacy with my boyfriend. I'm more intimate with him that I will ever be with anyone. ''The partner being unfaithful may spend inappropriate or excessive time with someone of the opposite or same gender (time not shared with the other partner). He or she may confide more in their new �friend� than in their partner and may share more intimate emotional feelings and secrets with their new partner than with their existing spouse. Any time that an individual invests more emotionally into a relationship with someone besides their partner the existing partnership may suffer.''

I don't, and do not entend to do any of that...

''Deception and secrecy. Those involved may not tell their partners about the amount of time they spend with each other. An individual involved in this type of affair may, for example, tell his or her spouse that they are doing other activities when they are really meeting with someone else. Or the unfaithful spouse may exclude any mention of the other person while discussing the day�s activities to conceal the rendezvous.''

I don't hide any of the time I'm spending with S with my boyfriend. I do not hide any text, or any conversation. He knows that we are a couple in our larp, and he knows we have been flirting. The only thig I'm hiding is that S loves me back... But I will tell him.

''Increased fighting'' Not happening either. We never fight, anyways.

I've been lurking over /r/polyamory . I was thinking it was only open-relationships, couples that could sleep with other people outside of their relationship. But it looks like it's more then that! I still want to be physically exclusive to my boyfriend. But emotionnaly, I... I guess I'm polyamorous. This is from the french polyamour wikipedia page (rough translation): ''According to the philosopher Vincent Cespedes, polyamorous try to think in terms of inclusion: a partner does not chase the other but it adds to the other. The author create the notion of "inclusivism" in love, and contrasts this conception to the "exclusiveness" the obligation not to love both.''

That is closer to what I feel. I'm sorry if the way I see love is very different from yours and that offended you. The world isn't all black and white!

# ? Aug 16, 2018 18:16

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Mordiceius posted:

That is closer to what I feel. I'm sorry if the way I see love is very different from yours and that offended you. The world isn't all black and white!

Larval attention whore blossoms into full on poly crazy person. They grow up so fast :ohdear:

# ? Aug 16, 2018 18:20

La Brea Carpet: Nov 22, 2007; I have no mouth and I must post

Mordiceius posted:

Blah blah blah

Yeah because that's who you want to defend your positions on love and sex, French philosophers.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 18:41

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

La Brea Carpet posted:

Yeah because that's who you want to defend your positions on love and sex, French philosophers.

would totally bang simone de beauvoir/albert camus tbf

# ? Aug 16, 2018 18:51

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Mordiceius posted:

I don't hide any of the time I'm spending with S with my boyfriend. I do not hide any text, or any conversation. He knows that we are a couple in our larp, and he knows we have been flirting. The only thig I'm hiding is that S loves me back... But I will tell him.

The only thing I�m hiding is the incredibly important bit.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 19:23

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

my peasant costume doesn't win over the ladies at the renn fair

# ? Aug 16, 2018 19:26

Shnag: Dec 8, 2010; "I'll be whatever I wanna do!"

Pvt.Scott posted:

The only thing I’m hiding is the incredibly important bit.

Has the possibility of her SO being offended and dumping her ever enter her mind?

# ? Aug 16, 2018 19:30

Ouhei: Oct 23, 2008; Cat Army

Pvt.Scott posted:

The only thing I�m hiding is the incredibly important bit.

Isn't she leaving out that she loves him too? That seems rather important.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 19:41

phasmid: Jan 16, 2015; Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

Xenocides posted:

Emotional cheating is okay right?

I really think she missed the point of the Arthur-Lancelot-Guinevere thing if she is not expecting everything to burn down around her.

I also think she needs to look up what platonic means. It is not just a lack of sex, it is a lack of romance.

Reading that was kind of a headache. For someone who seems charged toward plurality, she really doesn't know the difference between singular and plural nouns.

Ouhei posted:

Anyone that says this:

Is a train-wreck waiting to happen, so it's not shocking to see her heading full steam into a massive pile up.

I had the exact same thought.

Xenocides posted:

I need to call my parents and tell them I love them and thank them for everything they did and did not do.

Long but I found it to be a fascinating tale of horror.

And this is just about as gross as it is sad. I feel like this is the end result of those people who do the bare minimum for their kids so that they can go out, party and generally try to act like they're teenagers forever. gently caress these people.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 19:53

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

My husband and I [22f and 25m] wanted a dog. His parents [40s] got us a chihuahua. We're... Upset?

quote:

Married for 2 years. My husband grew up with dogs and I grew up with cats. I've always wanted a dog and we both feel like having a dog and two cats is the best way to live your life. We don't want any kids, if that's relevant. We've had two cats fot a while, and were finally ready to get a dog. To give you an idea, my ideal dog is a Greyhound/Irish wolfhound mix and his is a Huskey or an Greyhound.

So we decided that we want to get a retired Greyhound and have been looking into that. Our lease ends soon and we want to make sure that wherever we move is dog friendly. If, out of necessity we have to move someplace that doesn't allow dogs, we will hold off on getting one for another year, when we'll be moving out of state.

So we celebrated Christmas with his parents Sunday. We're all not Christian but we have to celebrate Christmas cause all the mom's friends do it. Nevermind that it's not on the 20th . We got them all some candy and a gift, and didn't really expect a present from them. That is, until his mom grins at us and asks us to follow her upstairs to see our gift. I am immediately plagued with stomach cramps, accompanied by what has to be a wave of ministrokes, because knowin her, this cannot be good. An ugly piece of furniture? A horrible painting? Nope. A crated chihuahua stands at the top of the stairs.

His mom says that she knows we are holding off on getting a dog because of our living situation, but that's why a chihuahua is just poifect for us! It's small and (quote) 'easy to hide from landlords'. The look on my husband's face was priceless. He told his mom that we don't like small dogs, and she called us heartless and ungrateful and started bawling. So we took the little rat home for the time being because the mom's bulldog would eat it.

I feel absolutely awful for the puppy. He is sweet, like all animals are, but he's also very loud and he's a chihuahua. Husband and I really don't want him. He probably cost a shitload of money and besides, we don't want to abandon him at an animal shelter. We got him some food and toys and a big pillow to sleep on, but he likes to sleep in bed with us. I don't want him to get attached, nor do I want to crush him in my sleep.

What the hell do we do? Do we keep the little thing and make the best of it? Do we dump it at his mom's, who doesn't take good care of animals? Both thse options seem terrible.

By the way, my husband will talk to his mom about boundaries, that's not the problem.

Edit: thank you so much for the advice everyone! I posted on FB and a good friend of mine is interested. She doesn't care that he's not a full chi and she loves animals. She's on vacation right now but wants to meet the dog and see if he clicks with her other dogs after she gets back next week. If that doesn't work out I will go to a rescue.

TL;DR = were gifted a chihuahua by in laws. We don't want it. What do we do?

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:09

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Haifisch posted:

My husband and I [22f and 25m] wanted a dog. His parents [40s] got us a chihuahua. We're... Upset?

You do not surprise someone with a ten-year-us commitment as a "gift" Jesus Christ

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:11

TheScott2K: Oct 26, 2003; I'm just saying, there's a nonzero chance Trump has a really toad penis.

Also, add this poo poo to poly.txt

https://twitter.com/polynerdeia/status/1028297343504998400?s=19

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:11

hawowanlawow: Jul 27, 2009

just sitting in my room, getting angry at hypothetical situations

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:13

china bot: Sep 7, 2014; you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX; Plaster Town Cop

TheScott2K posted:

Also, add this poo poo to poly.txt

https://twitter.com/polynerdeia/status/1028297343504998400?s=19

https://twitter.com/Zulnutt/status/1030170186282872832

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:14

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

TheScott2K posted:

Also, add this poo poo to poly.txt

https://twitter.com/polynerdeia/status/1028297343504998400?s=19

hahahahahahaha

Angry about what?? hahahahaha

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:14

Yawgmoth: Sep 10, 2003; This post is cursed!

Haifisch posted:

My husband and I [22f and 25m] wanted a dog. His parents [40s] got us a chihuahua. We're... Upset?

If they live in a reasonably sized city, there are "shelters" that are basically vets' offices with staff who all love having a rotating cast of pets at home that foster them. My roommate and I volunteered with one for a time. They make sure that the people who adopt their pets are a good fit. Probably her best bet.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:14

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

i'm going to be the MLK of polyamory

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:14

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Straight White Shark posted:

i'm going to be the MLK of polyamory

I have three dreams

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:15

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Barudak posted:

I have three dreams

Are you fluid bonded to any of them?

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:17

china bot: Sep 7, 2014; you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX; Plaster Town Cop

Straight White Shark posted:

i'm going to be the MLK of polyamory

you'll bend for the mounting top

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:18

Whorelord: May 1, 2013; Jump into the well...

"I have a dream that my four little polycules will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by their insufferable personalities, but by the content of their std test results. I have a dream today!"

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:25

phasmid: Jan 16, 2015; Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

TheScott2K posted:

Also, add this poo poo to poly.txt

https://twitter.com/polynerdeia/status/1028297343504998400?s=19

A poly woman named Constance. My, my.

Barudak posted:

I have three dreams

Hahaha

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:26

Ralph Crammed In: May 11, 2007; Let's get clean and smart

TheScott2K posted:

You do not surprise someone with a ten-year-us commitment as a "gift" Jesus Christ

Just don't surprise anyone ever with anything that's alive as a gift. A friend of mine was gifted a dwarf hamster by his coworkers and I ended up adopting it because he still lived with his parents at the time and they weren't cool it due to allergies. Little bugger lived for two and a half years. I developed an affection for the little guy after a while, but jeez, they make so much noise at night and you got to clean out their cage all the time and stuff. It's half a curse to take care of tiny animal that will disappear and die in your sofa or bookcase if it wiggles out of it's cage and also the dog wants to eat it.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:26

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Ralph Crammed In posted:

the dog wants to eat it.

Let it

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:31

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Haifisch posted:

My husband and I [22f and 25m] wanted a dog. His parents [40s] got us a chihuahua. We're... Upset?

Goddamn talk about an attack on you, you cannot let this aggression go unchecked. Inanimate gifts are aggressive enough but a living gift? No. Now every day will be filled with the snide yapping of that tiny apple headed freak and the dog she gave you. Your only options left are to make a similarly life-altering and permanent gift to your mother in law or to give them the gift of silence.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:33

Baronjutter: Dec 31, 2007; "Tiny Trains"

Anyone who gifts living things should be arrested and dissected to find out what is wrong with their brains

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:35

phasmid: Jan 16, 2015; Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

Baronjutter posted:

Anyone who gifts living things should be arrested and dissected to find out what is wrong with their brains

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:38

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

I propose a retaliatory gift of thousands of live crickets

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:40

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 06:21

Taima: Dec 31, 2006; tfw you're peeing next to someone in the lineup and they don't know

Admiral Ray posted:

Goddamn talk about an attack on you, you cannot let this aggression go unchecked. Inanimate gifts are aggressive enough but a living gift? No. Now every day will be filled with the snide yapping of that tiny apple headed freak and the dog she gave you. Your only options left are to make a similarly life-altering and permanent gift to your mother in law or to give them the gift of silence.

You're loving weird dude. I get that you're trying to make a joke or something (I guess? Maybe?) but you actually don't come off as having a cogent viewpoint here so it pretty much turns your post into a jumble of meaningless words.

# ? Aug 16, 2018 20:41

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