Bobby Digital posted:

Lemniscate Blue posted:

Roll that beautiful beam footage!

purple death ray posted:

And y'know why is it racist to say that all black people like fried chicken and watermelon? Lots of white people like fried chicken and watermelon! If you ask me, this politically correct thing has gotten out of hand, and all lives matter.

D-Pad posted:

After visiting China i discovered racial stereotypes about fried chicken and watermelon are true, we just got the wrong race. Multiple times I saw KFCs across the street from each other and they were as common as starbucks over here. They frequently had lines. Watermelon is everywhere and frequently brought to the table for free after a meal.

purple death ray posted:

O. Henry O-Face posted:

The beams are coming from inside the thread

Krankenstyle posted:

Zamboni Rodeo posted:

If I have to hear this song in my head when I see this gif, then goddammit I am taking the rest of you down with me:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BC35cQKHwzg

Uptime Sinclair posted:

All things swerve the beam

Colonel Cancer posted:

Pfft that's nothing I knew a guy who could solve a Rubik's cube blindfolded... With his anus.

Hammerite posted:

I bought a cheap one and rubbed it all over my cock and balls. now when you try to solve it pubes come out.

rubik's pubes

tonkafloss posted:

now all, iam going to do is go to bed aqnd egt drunk with the thought of stefanie K from desgrassi

so bery very drubk now........................

Clitch posted:

This, but unironically. The plague is here. The smartest people in the world are telling us it's the rats. There's a tariff on rat poison, subsidies on rat food, and all reasonable restrictions on rat breeders are being dismantled. A large percentage of the population spend the day rubbing their faces in a pile of rats, and tossing them over the fence at their anti-plague carrying rat neighbors. They do this because a massive movement of political, industrial, and media actors have whipped them into a tribal fury and convinced them that licking rats is how they piss off the other tribe and win, and then they can rely on being impoverished, disease ridden rat farmers like their grand-daddies were, and bah gawd that's honest work! Also, a black guy said rats are bad.

Your only legal defense against the tide of rat feces lapping at your doorstep is a political apparatus that has been doggedly turned against you over decades, and the only remedy for that broken system is a judicial body that is being further stacked against you you by the day, or an armed rebellion that will never happen as long as the cable and WiFi still work.

In the meantime, the smart people from the first paragraph pipe up on occasion to let you know this out of control rat population is moving their estimate for the tipping point of an unstoppable global pandemic up by a matter years.

Every two years you get a chance to maybe make the rat boom slow down a teensy bit, but sooner or later the rat bubble is going to burst and destroy the economy. Too bad them heathens in the ratfucker tribe are mostly cops and active/ex-military and buy 10 guns to your one. If they're lucky, your kids can spend their prime years as concubines and slave labor before everyone collapses into puddles of their own internal organs.

LoL and aw shucks, right? If we had another hundred years maybe humanity turns it around, but not on our timeline. Inertia's a bitch.

Gimme the large Frosty. gently caress knows I don't want to live forever.

CannonFodder posted:

It's funny, I support the end results of his request but not the logic of how he gets there.

If you can switch from plastic water bottles to a metal thermos you can reduce the amount of plastic going in landfills and oil used to make the bottles.

If you learn how to make your own bread you can eat very tasty fresh bread and there's a certain satisfaction in making your own staff of life.



I mean stop being a soyboy beta cuck and Man Up with these Internet Lessons.

life is killing me posted:

All my water, I drink out of an RTIC cup, so there's that. We don't stock water bottles anymore, they fill up recycling pretty fast and take up tons of space in the other fridge so why do it?

Unfortunately my wife has left me for a baker 😖

oldpainless posted:

He probably has more dough than you do

Powershift posted:

Chairman Mao posted:

If that thing doesn't grab your wrist in a death grip the second you put the key in then what is even the loving point?

your friend a dog posted:

squash your dick like a drat jelly filled donut. imagine a red filled twinky under a hydraulic press

ultrafilter posted:

https://twitter.com/shaenongarrity/status/1145057269903552518

Whybird posted:

When Sluggo came a-panicking about the sound he'd heard
I tried to make him understand but mangled every word
The meaning of this incident was too much to explain
So we simply stood and stared at the anthropomorphic train

Oh,
Seven mighty firetrucks and seven mighty hoses
That's the secret of the world that Nancy now discloses
Nothing else to say as our existence decomposes
Seven mighty firetrucks and seven mighty hoses

Absurd Alhazred posted:

D-Pad posted:

After visiting China i discovered racial stereotypes about fried chicken and watermelon are true, we just got the wrong race. Multiple times I saw KFCs across the street from each other and they were as common as starbucks over here. They frequently had lines. Watermelon is everywhere and frequently brought to the table for free after a meal.

El Gallinero Gros posted:

As pointed out by Dave Chappelle, pretty much everybody likes those things, so the stereotype is odd.

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Pirate Radar posted:

I first read this to the tune of the battle hymn of the republic and heard it in my head sung by a big military choir

Matlack Radio posted:

cumshitter posted:

2mello is fun and I love his poo poo on video game tracks

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SnR4u43kSDk
'
my name is robo

I have metal joints

beat me up

and get 15 silver points

Doc Hawkins posted:

his name is gato you dunce, you absolute ninny

cumshitter posted:

I hate the grammerly ads on youtube because I; as an English major, understand how to use punctuations.

I can even do the long list, where every sentence fragment is a a thing; I wish to poo poo cum; I will be making GBS threads cum; the cum is mine to poo poo; a long list is a complicated series of sentence fragments detailing stuff im too lazy to explain it

Wall Balls posted:

*thinking to self, sweating, visibly nervous* "of all the days to stop doing the moves alongside riddick every morning"

LonsomeSon posted:

Apropos of page number, someone I've known since they were five (and I was nine) enlisted in the Army as a fuel systems MOS of some kind but wound up assigned to a truck driver unit, the ones which would load up in Quatar, fly into either war and go on 1-2 week missions all along the big supply routes, then fly out for 2-6 nights of maintenance and loading time. And he's got the fueler MOS, he's one of the drivers for the convoy fuel truck. It was an up-armored cab at least but no turret, so they didn't have a gunner.

So naturally he and the hand-off driver would just spend their entire time on the road with the turret hatch open, just blazing blunts of mail-order spice, but all the other vehicle crews in the unit would be, too. People were smuggling in booze and probably driving drunk on MSR motherfucking Tampa during the year right before the DoD outlawed spice, which was if I recall the height of the Iraqi civil war.

Just, like, hunkering down and rolling through ambushes while cross-faded on research chemicals and Military Special-grade raw grain alcohol mailed in-country in a refilled mouthwash bottle, pedal to the metal with like 800 gallons of JP8. gently caress. That.

e: also this man came home a loving wreck, about 9 months after I got out, but we chilled a ton, he got me back into smoking weed, and then also one day we were talking in my parents' backyard when this big awkward (part-pitbull maybe part boxer?) mongrel puppy just runs up through the garage from the alley and starts playing with us. We fed him and gave him water and he fell asleep on the dude, which was just palpably adorable. We put up fliers for a few weeks but nobody claimed him, and they have been together since. He named the dog Tigger, because he is super excitable and bounces around when happy, and in pretty sure Tigger was more important than his family and friends in helping him cope with his PTSD and work through the alcoholic phase.

So that part was a happy ending, and also consider trying pets if feasible for your friends who are struggling when they get back.

Wild T posted:

A Warboy. Your friend is a Warboy who rode shiny and chrome as gently caress.

BigDave posted:

I would legit watch this war movie.

Stultus Maximus posted:

Fear and Loathing meets Wages of Fear.

Rockopolis posted:

"We can't stop here, this is ba'ath country!"?

The Little Death posted:

Kaiju Cage Match posted:

"Karen, I'm trying to steal the Krabby Patty secret formula, but I'm dummy thicc and the clap of my asscheeks keeps alerting Krabs"

Dumb Lowtax posted:

More like oldbrainless

Quiet Feet posted:

God, I can hear this in my head and there's a banjo involved.

A HORNY SWEARENGEN posted:

Started my day laughing at this and I'm still laughing.

howie phil posted:

With only a slight churning to mark its rise to the surface, the thing slid into view above the dark waters. Vast, Polyphemus-like, and loathsome, it darted like a stupendous monster of nightmares to the monolith, about which it flung its gigantic scaly arms, the while it bowed its hideous head and gave vent to certain measured sounds.

D-Pad posted:

After visiting China i discovered racial stereotypes about fried chicken and watermelon are true, we just got the wrong race. Multiple times I saw KFCs across the street from each other and they were as common as starbucks over here. They frequently had lines. Watermelon is everywhere and frequently brought to the table for free after a meal.

Rust Martialis posted:

It was right there dude

T-man posted:

bitch you wouldn't know philosophy if Satre came up to you with a cup of hemlock in one hand in a trolley while loving plato's cave while Kant watches

your vapid emptyheaded poor writing excuse is neither interesting nor novel