Pounded in the Butt by Members of a Forum Who Are Discussing a Space Ship's Gender

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Pounded in the Butt by Members of a Forum Who Are Discussing a Space Ship's Gender

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Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Phobeste posted:

yes, but watch the director's cut without the voiceover

No, watch the Final Cut without the voiceover and with the finished special effects.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2012 20:42

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 11:51

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Saint Darwin posted:

every art form and genre has a good amount of stuff that is really bad, I don't see it as unique to scifi. i think that most of the reason people don't want to be labeled as scifi or admit to reading it or talk crap about it is because its still relatively new and the giants in the genre are either still alive or have only died pretty recently.

Nah, it's because it's culturally associated with lowbrow pulp. Lightsabers and laser guns and all that. Movies and video games are probably the biggest culprits here.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 20:39 on Nov 17, 2012

# ¿ Nov 17, 2012 20:37

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Cold on a Cob posted:

what a coincidence I'm watching The Grey right now (halfway through, pretty good so far!)

Hate to break it to you, but the ending totally shoots itself in the foot with melodrama.

# ¿ Nov 19, 2012 04:05

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Cold on a Cob posted:

why haven't we had any seriously good sci fi movies in a long time? seems like the late 70s to the late 90s is when all the good sci fi happened and now it's all action movies in the future basically

This poor man, he hasn't seen Moon.

# ¿ Nov 23, 2012 18:57

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Grandmaster.flv posted:

I'm kind of disappointed cyberpunk has had maybe like a gran total of 15 books and movies. The only not total poo poo cyberpunk movie was Blade Runner. Arguably the Matrix but other than that...

Blade Runner isn't cyberpunk; it doesn't meaningfully feature computers. Cyberpunk copied the look, but that doesn't retroactively make Blade Runner cyberpunk.

I haven't seen it, but Ghost in the Shell is supposed to be A Good Cyberpunk Movie. But it's an anime, so I don't know if it counts.

# ¿ Nov 24, 2012 01:35

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

golgo13sf posted:

"Hey, you know that Dark Knight poster, how cool that was? Yeah, do it just like that"

Is that supposed to be London? I'm seeing 30 St. Mary Axe off to the right.

# ¿ Dec 3, 2012 18:09

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Saw previews for Oblivion and After Earth before The Hobbit (which was a bad movie that you shouldn't see); Oblivion looks even more like a video game than that Total Recall remake did, and After Earth is literally Enemy Avatar of the Apes. 2013's gonna be a good year.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 04:05 on Jan 31, 2013

# ¿ Dec 23, 2012 19:52

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Mister Snips posted:

whats with japans hosed up porn/anime

i mean theres always gonna be hosed up porn and its not like america doesnt export some hosed up stuff too but its like japan wants to be the weirdest and goes above and beyond the call of duty

Post-WWII censorship laws instituted by :911:

authorities forced them to latch onto creepy tentacle/panty/bukkake/whatever fetishes for their porn in place of actual sex, and it just spiraled downward from there. That's also where the mosaics come from.

# ¿ Dec 24, 2012 03:57

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Is Virtual Light any good? I got it a while ago but it's been pretty low-priority and I haven't read it yet.

# ¿ Dec 28, 2012 09:33

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Amethyst posted:

CD is such a tiresome forum. someone says they found the goblin king really silly and over the top and the regulars say "uh, didn't you watch teh beginning of the film? bilbo is exaggerating the story as he tells it, you aren't meant to take that literally!"

gog danm

# ¿ Jan 2, 2013 05:24

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

i just found billy idol's cyberpunk cheap at a thrift store. should i buy it or is it the boring kind of bad?

i'm thinking that it'll go great with my johnny mnemonic vhs.

speaking of vhs old sci-fi movies on [ [ w i d e s c r e e n ] ] vhs are the best thing.

# ¿ Jan 16, 2013 19:23

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

vi has a lot of character and spirit but its plot is ridiculous. you can really tell that the script was written in six weeks and it's offensive how shatner butchered sulu's role in the climax. at least change sulu's log so there isn't a discrepancy with who's studying "gaseous anomalies" you wienerlord.

# ¿ Jan 17, 2013 01:27

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

qntm posted:

but but who's the villain and what planet-destroying machine does he have

darth vader, the death star

# ¿ Jan 17, 2013 13:58

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

holiday special edition explosion, shameful.

# ¿ Jan 17, 2013 19:50

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

what's the sci-fi equivalent of a stylesheet where strong and oblique tags are broken and the best button still has that stupid double border on the right? the final frontier enterprise? the falcon's hyperdrive in the empire strikes back? i thought that they were going to fix this bullshit and it hasn't gone away.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 16:36 on Jan 18, 2013

# ¿ Jan 18, 2013 16:33

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

wasn't the '90s dr. who movie american or am i horribly mistaken?

Bad rear end Boutique posted:

what the gently caress

it's called a joke you silly goof.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 19:53 on Jan 18, 2013

# ¿ Jan 18, 2013 19:50

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

that awful man posted:

fixed

see the problem with remakes is that they never remake movies that actually warrant it. it would be one thing if they remade movies like the black hole where the premise was kinda cool but the cheesy execution killed it. nope instead we get bullshit like psycho '98. like did they actually think that they were going to make a better movie than alfred loving hitchcock? if not why even bother, why not just remake something else that has a chance of being worth the trouble?

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 06:13 on Jan 19, 2013

# ¿ Jan 19, 2013 06:09

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

ol qwerty bastard posted:

I'm about 3/4 done Revelation Space and goddamn is this a cool book. Who knew it was possible to write good space opera with no FTL.

i wanted to write one but then i read downbelow station and realized that i'd been beaten to the punch by a couple of decades.

if revelation space is anywhere near as good (and it's probably better given how much more of a reputation it has) i just might have to read it.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2013 05:52

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Moist von Lipwig posted:

X3 was the least fun I've ever had playing a video game

pfft "fun" look at this babby who can't appreciate the rewarding depth and sophistication of a real spaceships game. why don't you go back to playing starfox on your shitendo pee and leave the grownup starflight simulations to the people who can handle them. :smug:

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 03:58 on Jan 21, 2013

# ¿ Jan 21, 2013 03:32

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

regularizer posted:

In 2010, 40% of Americans still believed in creationism which is fairly loving mind-boggling.

it's a demographic thing. most creationists are olds and there is a lot of olds in murka.

also i watched the total recall remake today and it was really really eh. not even bad just completely forgettable.

well actually there were some bad things about it like the plot being full of holes (no psychics in this version so why bother with making quaid at all, cohaagen setting up "The Resistance" as an excuse to kick everyone out of "The Colony" and then not even mentioning it when he invades) and hinging on retarded science (gravity in free fall, toxic and breathable atmospheres staying neatly separated because there's no wind in the future). i couldn't tell how good the special effects were because everything looked like a goddamn video game anyway (when you're tired of ripping off blade runner, go for minority report!) and might as well have been one. destroying the elevator was completely bullshit. yeah chopping the world in half was a good thing because the elevator was built by TEH VILLAN OH NOEZ. "symbol of oppression" my rear end. also the piano scene was literally the only part of the movie that had any emotional resonance with me because the characters were so unidimensional and generic that i couldn't even care the rest of the time.

i know that the moron science and single-trait characters were even worse in the original movie but goddamn it wasn't SERIOUS about them. the remake is just "dramatic" as hell when people aren't punching each other and it's so much hot air that you could lift like five balloons with it.

on second thought this movie was pretty bad.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 13:45 on Jan 31, 2013

# ¿ Jan 31, 2013 03:48

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

ol qwerty bastard posted:

I didn't even manage to finish it. Got about halfway through, thought to myself "wow, I'm not enjoying this movie at all" and turned it off.

oh poo poo sorry for spoiling the movie. pretend that everything that i said about invasions and elevator explosions had black bars over it so you couldn't read it.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2013 04:19

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Al! posted:

boba fett mustve felt pretty weird running around a galaxy where most of the space cops and space soldiers were clones of his dad

he was a clone of his dad too so it would have been even weirder than just that.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2013 04:41

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

is anyone else excited for the brazil remake? in anyone else's hands i'd be extremely wary but christopher nolan has proven himself before and i'm convinced that he's the man for the job.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2013 21:16

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

jfc people i was joking about brazil being remade.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 03:28 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 03:25

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

"elan sleazebaggano" is the canonical name of a character who appears in one of the movies. like not expanded universe or anything, he actually has a scene where he talks with obi-wan.

and yet we still have spergs who take the star wars "universe" seriously.

ol qwerty bastard posted:

good one. you definitely pulled the wool over our eyes with that!!

nah it's just that the total recall thing had me thinking "what would be the worst science-fiction movie to remake?" and :nolan:

was just vaguely-plausible enough to be funny as the director. i figured that people would go "ha ha yeah wouldn't that be something" and leave it at that.

MancXVI posted:

because the republic is horrendously corrupt and aristocratic and only cares about fake poo poo for nobles and the only difference between it and the empire is that at least the empire openly admits that it's terrible

they're literally willing to clone people to fight against robots to resolve trade disputes

wait so lucas's lovely writing is actually internally consistent in the most interesting and unexpected way possible? like what if the prequels are a deliberate satire on the cartoony black-and-white morality of the original trilogy? really makes you think man. "from my point of view the jedi are evil" #wow #whoa

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 20:20 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 07:17

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

MancXVI posted:

gonna keep careposting about how terrible star wars is

so you're telling me that in the galaxy of loving space travel and laser swords they can't just electronically jam all those droids? it's really a better solution to send mass-produced meatbags to battle them in some empty field?

yeah it's almost like these space fantasy action movies for kids emphasize visual flashiness over practical tactics and strategy.

or in simpler less ironic terms that you might have a better chance of understanding:

The Star Wars saga practically runs on Rule Of Cool. Most of the Big drat Heroes and Big drat Villains carry at least one Laser Bladed BFS, the Cool Ships maneuver like airplanes and sea vessels even though Space Does Not Work That Way, and despite the Evil Overlords in The Verse presumably knowing how to Nuke Em, every movie features a Big Badass Battle Sequence pitting tons of Mooks against each other. Needless to say, Crowning Moments Of Awesome abound oh god oh god oh god :suicide:

ahmeni posted:

also jamming doesnt work like that

it actually would have worked in the phantom menace and was blindingly obvious to the point of being a plot hole. yet another reason for why that movie sucks balls out of an rear end (made of more balls).

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 14:07 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 13:55

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Siljmonster posted:

well now that star wars is owned by disney i guess its literally made for children

lucas used that excuse 14 years ago to justify jar jar and anakin "yippee" skywalker. not exactly a new development.

of course he's full of poo poo because the revenge of the sith was retardedly grimdark and violent, half of attack of the clones was a horrible boring "romance" that would put any preteen in a coma, and all three prequels were loaded with bullshit space government scenes that would put anyone in a coma. the obvious truth is that the man just has awful taste in everything.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 20:24 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 14:37

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Siljmonster posted:

every movie had some kind of kid in it for inexplicably no reason at all

you clearly don't know much about kids. the only thing that'll make a kid care about something is having a kid in it. if you think that a kid would ever be interested in (let alone idolize) an adult character you're delusional. this is why they don't make batman toys, only action figures (which are for adults to collect).

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

but yeah, that was gone by jedi; with things like chewie climbing inside of an AT-ST and off-camera gunning down the entire crew

also the loving teddy bear army.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 16:11 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 16:02

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

teh z0rg posted:

this is retarded

youre retarded

you're autistic if you thought that i was being serious.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 16:18

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Siljmonster posted:

i wonder if there were any kids that overly joyed at the opulence that was jar jar binks

i know that little kid me thought that frogs were the raddest and was all psyched for the badass frog jedi (who was definitely going to have a green lightsaber).

welp.

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 16:25

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Guido van Possum posted:

lucas would have been good if he wasnt a god drat retard

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 20:30

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Deacon of Delicious posted:

have you been reading your posts

especially that one with all of the capital letters

you don't get to call anyone else autistic

i'm not a troper, i actually had to research that loving thing.

never again. no joke is worth a visit to tvtropes.

also gg on ignoring the great wall of sperg that shaggar posted.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 20:42 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 20:31

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Can-O-Raid posted:

he lost all sympathy when he went Platoon on those tuscon raiders

tucson raiders

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 21:54

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Stymie posted:

heh

it's "tuscan" actually

it's sand people.

seriously "tusken raiders" is one of the dumbest names imaginable. it's like calling them "sui'desh bandits" or "rush-enn hunters". gog danm it lucas.

mankoonians

glasuejanns

fucker

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 23:25 on Feb 1, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 23:18

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

jesus chris i just remembered that there's a planet called mon calamari and it's populated by squid people. squid people who are in the movies.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 04:16 on Feb 2, 2013

# ¿ Feb 1, 2013 23:26

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

FMguru posted:

a greedy bounter hunter named "greedo"

a sexy dancing girl named "oola"

ugly, pig-faced guards called "ugh-naughts"

the star wars universe was full of stupid poo poo long before episode i came along

salacious crumb, the laughing hedonistic beaked monkey surrounded by a harem. also he constantly ogles bikini leia.

leia organa, the princess who stands against the technological might of the evil empire.

wicket w. warrick, the illiterate forest warrior with a middle initial.

sy snootles, the singer with her mouth at the end of a long snout.

mon calamari again because it's beyond unforgivable.

i have to admit though that it was a nice touch to name the cocky loner at the bar "solo" and then give him a sidekick.

i just realized that almost all of these are from return of the jedi. what a surprise.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 04:34 on Feb 2, 2013

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 04:22

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

NoneMoreNegative posted:

yeah not seeing a problem here

did jabba name him? that would excuse it.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 04:37

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

LP97S posted:

nice heels.

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 05:13

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

oh lord i think that i'm turning into a cd poster and i've never even been there.

i just pulled up the robot beatdown scene from prometheus on my computer for a quick laugh and "got" it. i knew that ridley scott had said in an interview that the robot was giving a basic "we come in peace" introduction. what "must" have happened was that when the alien touched michael fassbender's head it could somehow sense that he was a robot and his deliberately organic appearance was deceptive and showed that he could not be trusted and was probably a threat. so it ripped his head off.

now i realize that this is still pretty retarded and is basically an ad hoc explanation (it immediately decided to kill this random guy after jumping to a really drastic conclusion about his intent because it "somehow" knew that he was a robot) but i don't know why the scene would have even been written if it isn't true. it troubles me that i was actually able to "think" on the level of the cd thread (see nonsensical lovely writing, subconsciously attempt to fit it into some kind of explanation) in order to come up with this. the movie only makes sense if you explain everything away like a conspiracy theorist and for about 30 seconds tonight i was that conspiracy theorist.

please help me because i'm convinced that this is what they were going for and it scares me that i picked up on it.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 06:21 on Feb 2, 2013

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 05:42

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 11:51

Sham bam bamina!: Nov 6, 2012; ƨtupid cat

Stymie posted:

i interpreted that scene in prometheus as,

this is reassuring, i see that i still have a ways to go.

Sham bam bamina! fucked around with this message at 06:28 on Feb 2, 2013

# ¿ Feb 2, 2013 06:23

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > Pounded in the Butt by Members of a Forum Who Are Discussing a Space Ship's Gender

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