Roman/ancient history: Checkmate, Atenists

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Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Tao Jones posted:

(consider that Famous Lawyer Cicero pretty much only ever prosecuted one guy)

He prosecuted the hell out of that guy though.

# ¿ Jun 3, 2015 17:44

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 01:36

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Grand Fromage posted:

For educated slaves, people might've chosen it for their children. If you were a peasant and had a bright (male) kid, that kid's life as an educated slave like a doctor would probably be better than as a free peasant.

In Ancient Egypt people would not just voluntarily become temple slaves, they would actually pay for it because it was that much better than being a poor peasant.

# ¿ Jun 24, 2015 15:54

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Disinterested posted:

Although the history of stuff like public bathing is a really mixed one in medieval history. I remember someone posting about it before.

The baths in Rome weren't that hygienic. Even contemporary sources says that they were full of grease and dirt.

# ¿ Jun 24, 2015 18:11

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Kaal posted:

Basically I'd say that it's a known fact that the baths were extremely popular and fairly hygienic

Even the Romans themselves noted that during use the baths became increasingly more filthy.

# ¿ Jun 24, 2015 22:51

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

WoodrowSkillson posted:

yall realize the water was not just standing there and was instead being replaced often/constantly due to those big rear end aqueducts right?

The water in the cold baths were replaced fairly often but the hot water wasn't.

# ¿ Jun 25, 2015 15:13

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

WoodrowSkillson posted:

i really don't see well to do romans soaking themselves in gross rear end water

Well, they did. To quote the emperor Marcus Aurelius: "Such as bathing appears to thee,�oil, sweat, dirt, filthy water, all things disgusting,�so is every part of life and everything"

# ¿ Jun 25, 2015 16:57

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

cheerfullydrab posted:

People literally think that a Rome with vast armies of stocky, Italian-looking, legionaries in lorica segmentata overseen by senators in togas ended one day and was immediately replaced by filthy, bearded, and mustachioed barbarians squatting in smoky ruins gnawing on roasted boar's legs. That is a thing people in this world believe, I poo poo you not.

Britain was pretty hosed after the Romans left though. People left the major cities and even simple things like pottery went to poo poo. People actually reused funeral urns.

# ¿ Jun 26, 2015 10:56

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Sulla-Marius 88 posted:

Imagine smoking three marijuana cigarettes and then having premarital interracial intercourse in a stolen police cruiser while listening to that song about Satan by iron metallica. Now double it. That's opium - not even once.

Having sex with someone that has another skin color, the ultimate high.

# ¿ Jul 7, 2015 13:55

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Nobody make the obvious joke :mad:

# ¿ Jul 8, 2015 17:12

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

WoodrowSkillson posted:

I think he means the joke i made in response to him

I'm not even sure that qualify as a joke.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2015 12:32

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

JaucheCharly posted:

I know and I'm quite sure, nobody gave a poo poo about that. No fashion magazines to make you feel inferior about your figure.

The vikings actually made other people feel inferior about themselves. They bathed once a week and combed their beard and hair. People actually wrote about how those drat well groomed vikings got more laid than they did.

# ¿ Jul 9, 2015 14:59

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

NLJP posted:

On the whole milk debate, much more interesting is who ever thought up Cow Blowing first: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cow_blowing

Basically: blow air up a cow's vagina or anus to stimulate more milk production. We know this happened all the way up to the 19th century in some places but certainly from near the start of bovine domestication.

Also, why do many sub-saharan pastoralists have shitloads of cows but mostly drink their blood rather than their milk?

edit: reading a bit more, it does seem that more milk than I thought was also used by sub-saharan people but again, more mixed with blood. Probably disregard that question then, I think: answer seems pretty obvious. Just other ways of extracting rich nutrition.

So basically there was one adventurous dude in antiquity who one day asked himself "I wonder what would happen if I blow in this cow's rear end in a top hat."

# ¿ Jul 13, 2015 11:01

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

my dad posted:

*Quintus starts shuffling his feet awkwardly*

Well, I certainly didn't drink too much wine and started to blow Bessy's vagina like she was a loving balloon animal!

# ¿ Jul 13, 2015 14:35

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

LingcodKilla posted:

Oh. I just had a hunch that some dude blew air up his farm wives vag

Baby, I don't think this is what they mean with the word blowjob

Alhazred fucked around with this message at 21:11 on Jul 13, 2015

# ¿ Jul 13, 2015 21:02

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Robo Reagan posted:

I'm sure the answer is yes, but googling "greatest rulers" likes to list Hitler who wasn't really the type of great I'm looking for.

Were there any rulers in history that weren't colossal dickbags? Like, Alexander the Great is the Great because he tore rear end across the continent. Were there any kings or queens or any sort of leader at all I suppose going back from the feudal era who just sort of chilled and did cool + neat stuff for their subjects or were they all sociopaths/insane because that's what it took to keep from getting assassinated five minutes in?

Frederick II was pretty cool. He managed to conduct a crusade where not a single drop of blood was shed for example. Of course this meant that rest of Europe loving hated him (especially the pope) and Dante put him in the sixth circle of hell.

# ¿ Aug 2, 2015 12:53

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Hogge Wild posted:

Henry VIII was also a great ruler.

Except for the fact that he bankrupted England and executed anyone (including his wife) he didn't like.

# ¿ Aug 9, 2015 09:31

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

LingcodKilla posted:

Before the invention of a reliable time piece I think the only true open ocean sailors not relying on luck but true navigational skills were the Polynesian.

They also relied on their testicles.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2015 18:03

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

LingcodKilla posted:

My problem is that my calls contract nice and tight when cold so I wouldn't get wave action.

Maybe your testicles are broken?

# ¿ Aug 29, 2015 16:34

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Smoking Crow posted:

I asked my classics professor and he didn't know the answer so here goes:

Did anyone in ancient Greece sacrifice to/hold festivals for/build temples to Hades? Did the Romans do the same for Pluto?

The Greeks didn't even want to use his name so I don't see why they would build temples for him.

# ¿ Oct 8, 2015 19:20

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Hogge Wild posted:

Some years ago I learned a new racial slur on these forums. Norwegians are called 'Sea Jews'.

Someone was loving with you :ssh:

# ¿ Oct 17, 2015 11:32

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Terrible Opinions posted:

Nope this is the very thing that broke the true line of Roman succession. Pants are barbaric and nothing can change that.

En Romanos, rerum dominos, gentemque togatam!

# ¿ Dec 31, 2015 17:06

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Otteration posted:

Did Roman toilets and garum improve sanitation?

In Rome toilets were often placed near the kitchen. So probably..not?

# ¿ Jan 16, 2016 13:05

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Grand Fromage posted:

Norwegian and Swedish are going to be very similar.

You take that back :colbert:

# ¿ Mar 21, 2016 16:45

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Tunicate posted:

Good news, everyone.

Turns out the scrolls found in Herculaneum were written in lead-based ink so we can read them with an x-ray machine.

I'm starting to wonder if there was anything in antiquity that wasn't lead-based.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2016 13:42

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Patter Song posted:

One of these days The Lives of Famous Whores will turn up. It'll just say "Your mother."

It'll have more literary merit than Lives of the Twelve Caesars.

Isn't Lives of Twelve Caesars pretty much The Lives of Famous Whores?

# ¿ Mar 28, 2016 12:53

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Grand Fromage posted:

Whore number one, my ex wife:

By Tiberius.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2016 18:06

Alhazred: Feb 16, 2011

Blue Star posted:

What kind of law enforcement was there back in ancient Greece and Rome? I'm under the impression that there wasn't much of anything like a police force, just militias and something like a neighborhood watch. Is this correct? And if I'm a rich person and I witness someone break into my house and steal something but they manage to slip away, what do I do then? How do I track down the thief, and what do I do when I catch him?

There were vigiles.

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 12:05