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So my baby is just shy of 11 weeks and we are dealing with sleep issues naturally. In the first few weeks of life she would just eat and then doze off on her pillow thing through out the day and so she was actually getting a lot of sleep and was calm and rested. Now she is not really dozing at all and wants to do stuff even though she is still too little to really do much so she is ultra crabby and having insane crying jags all the time now. So I've been trying to get her to take at least two naps at scheduled times. However no matter how tired she is she will fuss herself awake usually between 5 to 45 minutes into sleeping. This will happen at night too although sometimes she is an ok night time sleeper, though it seems to be getting worse. She starts fussing and struggling and punching herself in the face and wakes up entirely pretty quickly... For a few days it was possible to soothe her back to sleep but she doesn't really respond anymore. This is probably all normal baby stuff but if anyone has any ideas please let me know. I was actually sleeping lots more during the first 8 weeks of her life, getting a really decent amount of sleep and now I am not at all and it's making me a bit insane. Also, a lot of the sleep guides and such recommend around this age putting your baby in the crib drowsy and having her fall asleep on her own but what is this supposed to look like? Putting her down not asleep results in immediate shrieking here so I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be doing.
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Aug 2, 2021 01:59
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space uncle posted:A baby swing (I think our model was the snugaboo fisher price) was the ultimate solution to the baby not napping well throughout the day. I could pop a very fussy kid in there and get a 45 minute nap, and could even transfer the baby to his bassinet or crib after he was out. She's hilariously picky about some things, she will only sit in the swing we have in order to watch me cook dinner, and won't sleep in it. The white noise machines are good, I have two that I use and a fan. My sister swears by the wubanubs also. So far the only pacifier I can get her to enjoy are these natural rubber ones from Denmark that I had to order specially but once she can hold things better I will try one of these too. She is exclusively breastfeeding for now so I nurse her then let her snooze on my lap or in arms until she passes out then put her down. We don't really have a feeding schedule because she has demanded to eat almost approximately every single hour on the hour since she has been alive. We are seeing the lactation nurse this week again to make sure all is ok with my milk production etc but she just wants to eat and eat and eat all the time. This also plays into her crankiness I guess.
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Aug 2, 2021 03:14
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Hippie Hedgehog posted:
Congrats! Sister's 3.5 year old is still struggling with potty training but she doesn't get a lot of consistency at home which doesn't help. Most recent horror story I heard was that she had a poop accident the other day in her pullups, told my sister she needed to change and when my sister was too slow helping her, took off the diaper, and hit my sister square in the face with it, lol. Sister kinda deserved that.
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Aug 4, 2021 22:59
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My mom keeps trying to put on cocomelon for my not quite 12 week old despite my telling her that a: no screen time (she insists we could just turn the screen off and let the sound play) and b: no kids music garbage in our house. My insistence that we don't have screen time for the first few years is always met with a "well I had you start watching sesame street when you were four months old and look how you turned out," which is not the positive endorsement my mom thinks it is.
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Aug 7, 2021 05:31
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life is killing me posted:Did I get stoned and change my name to hallo spacedog last night because that’s some stoned German poo poo right there for sure and hilarious I think they stated quoting me but ended up quoting you somehow. I also miss the days of smoking up whenever. It was a major victory for us this week finally figuring out what time the baby actually wants to go to sleep (between 9-10) because that gave me the opportunity to enjoy a low-alcohol beer late last night knowing she wouldn't be up until around 4-5 am.
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Aug 7, 2021 14:09
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Its interesting to hear that many people here do not adhere to that recommendation about screen time. Since this is our first baby I guess I don't know what to expect as we move forward and she gets older, and we were just taking the advice we were given by the pediatrician. Our primary reason for trying to adhere to it is because both her father and I have crippling ADHD, and both grew up in homes where we were put in front of a tv for long periods of time from an early age. That said there's probably a happy medium to be ha, and I am aware that I am still in the panicky first time mom stage of this whole process. Edit: that said, kids music like cocomelon is still going to be banned forever hallo spacedog fucked around with this message at 21:22 on Aug 7, 2021 |
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Aug 7, 2021 21:20
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Dobbs_Head posted:I have a lot of issues with the medical establishment’s recommendation for zero screen time before 2. It is far too strong a recommendation based on the data. It’s also not calibrated to the upper middle income demographic. Thanks, this certainly gives me something to consider and I appreciate the nuanced breakdown for someone like myself who is not so well versed in understanding that kind of data. If we do end up deciding to let the baby watch anything I am going to probably still tell my family we don't because I don't trust them to not show her the previously mentioned garbage if she is visiting them. Although the amount of time she will be spending unsupervised with her grandparents is probably going to be minimal for a while anyway as I am exclusively breastfeeding and do not plan to return to work once my leave is over.
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Aug 8, 2021 00:16
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Baby turns 3 months old tomorrow. Sleep feels impossible... Every time I think I have a grasp on her sleep and how to deal with it it changes. I've been trying to be consistent nightly and she just is not. I know this is all like babies.txt but it's so frustrating feeling like her sleep is actually getting worse and not better. Anyway I'm finishing up hour 3 of rocking her on my chest in hopes she'll fall deep asleep enough to put down which hasn't happened yet, we have had 5 or so false starts so far.
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Aug 18, 2021 03:42
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Tom Smykowski posted:It definitely gets better. Baby's sleep improves and your bar for Good Sleep drops a lot so it feels better at least. Thanks. It just seems so weird to me that she was better at sleeping for a stretch at one and two months than she is now, as she's been waking up every 2hr45 min to eat recently where she was previously sleeping 4-6 hour stretches no problem. I even had a few nights where we slept 8-10 hrs straight but not anymore.
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Aug 18, 2021 19:15
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When do babies get better at sleeping on their backs? She is 3 months as of yesterday. Last night was probably one of the most miserable nights I've had since the first week she was born. Tried to put her to bed around 8:30, screaming etc until 1 am, slept 1 to 5, woke to nurse but now refuses to get back in her basinette. Every time I put her down in it she could be dead to the world, floppy armed asleep on me or in my arms, and then shakes herself back awake between 5-10 minutes later if not sooner. I feel helpless and like I don't know how to do this at all.
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Aug 19, 2021 11:34
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Aryoc posted:I've had a very similar experience (baby fully wakes up as soon as she makes contact with the crib), it changed once she learned to roll over well and could decide by herself how to sleep. I don't remember when that was anymore, just that eventually we got over that period. So just have patience, there's no trick to it unfortunately. I'm really hoping this will be the case although I don't know how close she is to rolling over. My mom, being of a much different generation, always just tells me they used to put us to sleep on our stomachs (as was the style at the time) and we were perfectly comfortable etc so not very helpful. As tempting as it is to try co sleeping I am too scared of what can go wrong. So during the daytime hours I just try to let her nap on the nursing pillow if she wants to so at least she gets some sleep. I did manage to get her in the crib for 30 minutes earlier and took a short nap at that time and then my husband will help me get a nap in this afternoon when he gets home too. Edit: question though, once the baby can flip over to her tummy if she does that is it safe to just let her sleep that way? hallo spacedog fucked around with this message at 15:25 on Aug 19, 2021 |
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Aug 19, 2021 15:21
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Nessa posted:Yes, once baby can roll over on their own, they are strong enough to roll themselves back if they need to, or turn their head. Thanks, I feel very clueless sometimes so I appreciate that. I'm really hoping that she gets there soon. She is sleeping on the positioner pillow right now while I watch her. If I can get her back to the crib again I will.
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Aug 19, 2021 15:41
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Hadlock posted:The reason they want the baby to sleep on their back, is that they won't sleep as deeply. That's the whole point. If you can't get into deep sleep, your primitive infant brain can't forget to breathe. It's in the peer reviewed papers that "back is best" is based on Thank you for this, I had no idea that was the reason. Fingers crossed she starts rolling soon.
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Aug 19, 2021 22:33
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Gay Nudist Dad posted:Are you swaddling? I've definitely found that our 2mo will wake herself up with uncontrollably flapping limbs if she's not constrained somehow. We don't proper swaddle with the blanket and all - largely because we never figured it out, really - but stuff like this or this make a big difference. Since the day she came home from the hospital she has been impossible to swaddle. We had swaddlers like yours from my sister's baby but doing it will make her scream bloody murder. So I gave up and have used an arms free sleep sack thing instead. But she does flail herself awake like yours does unfortunately. I ended up letting her nurse laying down in my bed, so she fell asleep while I stay awake, then moving her to hers. All cosleep precautions taken for good measure but I stayed awake because I am too afraid to cosleep. I managed about 2-3 hr. Decided to move into my mom's house starting Sunday so I can get some help.
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Aug 20, 2021 11:58
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Hippie Hedgehog posted:That actually sounds exactly like how we solved it. I don't think it's uncommon or dangerous. 2-3 the whole night. If it had been per session it would feel more reasonable. I also might have slept a little more in the am but I became extremely anxious suddenly and then the baby pooped herself awake about two hours earlier than we normally get up.
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Aug 20, 2021 17:31
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Koivunen posted:That’s rough. Hopefully your mom can take a few shifts so you can catch up on sleep. With my first I only slept 2 hours a night for several weeks and I’m honestly surprised I didn’t end up with psychosis, but it was Not Good and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I forgot to thank you for that idea and photos yesterday. I'm going to get my husband to help me set this up to see how it goes tonight. I try to handle all the night time stuff on my own because he works in construction and I'm always worried that if he is too sleep deprived he could get injured or die. I will try calling my doctor about meds as I am not on anything. I take meds for ADHD and depression that I have been off of since March 2020 when we were trying for the baby so my quality of life wrt my mental health feels pretty low right now. The anxiety probably effects me a lot as I am always terrified about various stuff going wrong.
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Aug 20, 2021 20:02
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Hadlock posted:Can someone recommend a toy that, I dunno, I guess the baby pushes a button and it plays a 20-45 second song for them My sister gave me an older version of this.. It literally has one big button to press and plays like short classical tunes.
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Aug 21, 2021 00:04
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That's awesome, hoping you have many more of those ahead of you.
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Aug 24, 2021 10:35
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A question for those in the thread who are much better at understanding studies and such than I am; I am seeing a lot of conflicting information on bedsharing. I know the AAP recommends against it but I am seeing a lot of other information about the safe sleep 7 and Dr. McKenna's research on the topic. I guess I'm wondering if anyone can put in perspective whether bedsharing can be done safely or in a reasonably safe manner or should just never be done? I was always told growing up that it should not be done under any circumstances but now I'm wondering if that is an overstatement or not. Trying to get a better understanding or more balanced perspective on the topic.
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Aug 27, 2021 03:43
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Benagain posted:https://www.unicef.org.uk/babyfrien...sleep-and-sids/ This echoes what I am seeing. Basically in the book I am reading (Sweet Sleep) the research seems to boil down to saying the risks seem inflated because a: the studies do not differentiate between preexisting SIDS and bed suffocation accidents, b: the studies are including deaths caused by sleeping on an unsafe surface like a sofa etc in "bedsharing" and not an isolated study of just safer bedsharing practices and c: many deaths in the studies have the above mentioned risk factors of alcohol, tobacco, a non relative carer, etc. I read through some of the research parts of the book I am reading and it seems relatively reasonable. There's a whole chapter devoted to explaining some of the statistics for people like me who are basically terrified by it. I am conflicted because before having a child I was 100% sure I would never bedshare for many reasons and now that I had one I have what I can describe as a weird intense instinctive urge to sleep and be next to the baby.
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Aug 27, 2021 06:05
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cailleask posted:I did it with both kids and - it was fine? Obviously an anecdote isn't data, but I followed the guidelines around no pillows, sheets pinned low, no alcohol, etc. My kids generally slept pretty well and I slept pretty well. Not having to move or even really wake up to nurse was really fantastic. Did you wait until a certain time to start or was it basically from day 1?
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Aug 27, 2021 06:39
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1up posted:I started at 4 months with my oldest, that big sleep regression kicked my rear end and I just wanted to give her access to the titty buffet since she just nursed all god damned night at the time anyway. My youngest, we did it from day 1 with a snuggle nest in the bed until he was big enough that I was comfortable letting him sleep beside me. Tbh, not cosleeping at the start was confusing to my family. My mom is Mexican and it's just A Thing You Do and no one ever questioned it. Thanks, this is really helpful to think about.
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Aug 27, 2021 07:23
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Dobbs_Head posted:The bad outcome for co-sleeping is SIDs, which is VERY BAD. But, the increased odds for SIDs due to just co-sleeping versus on back in a crib is very small. The medical community is extremely conservative to the point of giving unhelpful advice around small risks. Tired caregivers are worse caregivers which can cause bad outcomes too (think car crashes). Thanks I guess that's what resonated with me too - the fact that a lot of the bad outcomes are due to over tired caretakers (i.e. accidentally falling asleep on the sofa or other unsafe place with the baby) and the medical community unfortunately lumps this data in with 'safe/prepared' bedsharing in general. Emily Oster is great and I liked expecting better a lot. I should read Crib Sheets too.
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Aug 27, 2021 14:07
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2DEG posted:Okay, I'm gonna be That Guy and say, please don't give her any money. Oster is a hack from that annoying group of economists that think they have special insight into everything because they Know Numbers. Her thesis was so bad that she eventually had to retract it after admitting that the subject-matter experts telling her she was wrong wrong wrong were ultimately correct. Much like FAS experts are still insisting her drinking while pregnant advice is bad and dangerous. She also showed her whole rear end during the pandemic promoting absolute garbage studies that underpinned the push to get kids back in to in-person learning. She's the epitome of "garbage in, garbage out." Thanks, I didn't know that. I am also not going to defend her advice on drinking while pregnant, I found it interesting but did personally not choose to have a drink during pregnancy. I did find her info on food during pregnancy useful because it made me consider why various food was not recommended and avoid some things but not others over risk to the fetus (like taking mercury and listeriosis concerns seriously but food poisoning not as much). I do think similar to the questions about bedsharing I have just been thinking a lot about cultural differences in approaching this stuff too - I get that the AAP etc tries to give recommendations based on a wide swath of the best data available for everyone but it just seems so different in reality in so many places around the world. hallo spacedog fucked around with this message at 14:58 on Aug 27, 2021 |
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Aug 27, 2021 14:54
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For the past few weeks my baby has been really fussy while breastfeeding. She will eat a few seconds, then pull off to scream or cry, then try to eat again, and repeat over and over. Has anyone dealt with this? It feels like it's getting worse. She's just shy of 15 weeks.
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Aug 29, 2021 21:39
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Koivunen posted:Can you feel your letdown? Is there milk coming out when she pulls off? You could have letdown that is too fast (she can’t swallow fast enough so pulls off and cries), or letdown that takes a while to happen (she is frustrated that it’s not coming fast enough). Does she eventually latch and nurse? I don't always feel letdown when I nurse, only occasionally. It keeps going like that and usually she wont get a good long latch if she is that fussy. The head of my LLL chapter suggested teething might be a possibility.
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Aug 30, 2021 03:56
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femcastra posted:Mine went through a phase at 3-4 months where she pulled off repeatedly and cried, and it passed after around a month I think. Some days were better, some days were worse. Could be any number of things, behavioural or developmental. That's so strange. It sounds exactly like what ours is doing. Glad to hear it ended eventually for you and hoping it does for ours too. It sounds like you never figured out exactly why either.
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Aug 30, 2021 04:40
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femcastra posted:Yeah it was pretty awful at the time tho, I was very hormonal and emotional because of my hormonal bc so everything that went wrong felt exponentially worse. I would cry a lot. Persisted and occasionally supplemented with breastmilk in a bottle or formula, but eventually it was back to normal. Thanks for this. I am not on bc but I'm hormonal and it's upsetting so I definitely cry a lot when she is crying. I'm sorry you went through it but from my perspective it's good to know that others went through it and came out ok.
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Aug 30, 2021 14:39
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Has anyone else ever dealt with a baby who hates the car? I thought babies were supposed to love the car?
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Sep 3, 2021 00:26
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Koivunen posted:First kid loved the car, second kid hated and only now barely tolerates the car for shot twenty minutes at a time at three months old. Bloody murder screaming, inconsolable, pacifier only works for a moment…. Basically the same reaction as mine at 3.5 months. I'm hoping that by going on short trips daily I can help her build a tolerance for it but no improvement yet unfortunately.
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Sep 3, 2021 02:38
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Koivunen posted:Six hours until bedtime. God I'm sorry you are dealing with all of that and hope the last hours go better for you.
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Sep 9, 2021 21:48
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I'm surprised by that, we are in size ones at 17 weeks.
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Sep 14, 2021 02:32
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Well, the baby just flipped over on her own for the first time and I missed it. Put her in bed and went downstairs briefly for snack, came back to her completely flipped over on her tummy. drat.
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Sep 19, 2021 03:29
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Koivunen posted:I don’t get angry easily but I discovered the most infuriating thing today. My baby hates the car. The car needed oil so I had to drive to get it. On the way there and back he is screaming bloody murder at the top of his lungs. I’m a mile from home, and the person in front of me is driving way below the speed limit in a no passing zone. 30 in a 45. Hey there fellow car-hating baby buddy. It's really frustrating, especially cause you hear so much about people whose babies love the car/fall right to sleep in the car.
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Sep 21, 2021 20:46
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Douche4Sale posted:Our second was/still is like this. We were so confused because the car always worked so well for our older child, but the younger has hated it since he was born. He's now almost 3 and still whines and complains and fusses if he is in the car longer than 10 minutes. I keep telling myself he will outgrow it or eventually get over it... Oh no please don't tell me this could last several more years
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Sep 21, 2021 21:25
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Renegret posted:fwiw mine hated the car when he was born but grew to love it once we started taking him to school every day. I think once she can see around better she will also be happier. My husband thinks my car might be too loud and it bothers her. I'm not sure if that could be it.
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Sep 22, 2021 03:25
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This is maybe a dumb question but how do you schedule time to read a book into your evening routines. My baby takes a bath and then by the end of that is crazy tired and crabby so she wants to nurse and then after nursing usually falls asleep on the bed or if ultra crabby cries and then I rock her and she falls asleep from there, and then repeat nursing and passing out with her waking up and needing to be rocked. I haven't been able to figure out where best to do something like that especially as I've tried to read to her in the evening and not really gotten her to sit still for it. Also, does it usually take some time for a baby to be interested in books? Mine seems to be not very interested at all in general.
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Sep 23, 2021 00:14
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sheri posted:She's still a newborn right? She's 4 months now so maybe still a bit young. We did get some of those black and white books for her and she's ok with them but not like super interested. This is hard for me to gauge because my mom is always saying she should be read to or watching sesame street by now because I was but as time goes on I'm also realizing my mom has no idea about anything really.
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Sep 23, 2021 00:55
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Thanks everyone, I feel very much reassured that I'm not neglecting my baby horribly by not constantly reading to her at this stage. The poo poo that parents say gets under your skin even if you are aware it's mostly bs, you know?
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Sep 23, 2021 02:37
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| # ¿ May 16, 2024 10:50 |
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The baby figured out how to flip over and spent part of the night insisting on flipping over and then crying because she was flipped over. She slept on her stomach all night which is freaky and a bit scary the first time.
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Sep 24, 2021 14:06
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