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Trickjaw posted:Bantz, in it. For the record, I was not the old boy (who has Alzheimer's) He probably voted Brexit. Tie a knot in his catheter.
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Feb 1, 2017 10:46
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Dead Goon posted:Can confirm that the removal of a catheter really loving hurts. Last time I had a catheter out I had other concerns. I barely noticed. They also told me when I asked for a piss bottle that I might feel like I needed to go for a while but wouldn't be able to, and were surprised when they almost had to get another bottle. On the other hand, or possibly the other penis, gently caress catheters.
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Feb 1, 2017 12:47
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Rakosi posted:"I would like you to rule on this matter please sir" Dear President of the EU, whose authority I utterly shun along with the rest of your corrupt union, Please punish this man for being naughty. Yours sincerely, Someone who should be taken seriously.
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Feb 1, 2017 18:58
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Alternately, just read Puckoon.
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Feb 2, 2017 12:24
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The more I think about it, the more I feel that all Britain's problems can be solved by killing anyone who voted to leave the EU. Unemployment - disposing of 16 million dead will create full employment for a while, after which we'll have lots of vacancies. Also many career unemployed voted Leave. Housing - no problem, we'll have lots of room. Immigration - see housing, plus all the racists will be dead. Pensions - the elderly predominantly voted Leave, getting rid of 60% of them will at least postpone the issue for a generation or more. The NHS - doctors voted remain, the most draining patients voted leave. Win-win for the National Health there. I could go on, but I'm already getting silly. To make an actual serious comment: Brexit will fail because the people who are really making Britain bad are the people who are blaming the EU for the problems.
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Feb 2, 2017 13:01
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TinTower posted:One of the advantages of being a student is you can easily recognise the "thrown a sickie to get out of a 9am lecture". Abbott's migraine is the closest parliamentary equivalent to this since John Major had his wisdom teeth removed. Which means that the White Paper didn't exist before the vote.
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Feb 2, 2017 17:49
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Neither of these reaches the current benchmark, which is the TA unit who performed a controlled detonation on a suspicious package found at their barracks to find it was a box of leaflets with instructions on how to deal with suspicious packages.
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Feb 2, 2017 20:58
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Zephro posted:Not only is it true, it's been true for at least a decade: There were posters up when I was at uni over 20 years ago talking about the return of TB. Rickets is slightly less surprising. It's caused by a deficiency of vitamin D, so eating bad food and getting no sunlight puts you at risk.
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Feb 3, 2017 12:44
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namesake posted:I was going to say something about that but the bailing out/selling back to private hands is a terrible move so I think it'd have been better to keep the banks and the debt. Nationalising the banks wasn't automatically a bad idea. The bad idea was when the Tories yet again sold off the equity at an overall loss.
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Feb 5, 2017 02:40
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Dead Goon posted:He's very cosmopolitan, isn't he? German wife, French mistress, it's like he doesn't hate the EU at all! Germany still has a couple of Nazis.
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Feb 6, 2017 14:03
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Pochoclo posted:Sorry, yes, I know Aberdeen is not the absolute cheapest place, but it's the cheapest reasonable sized city with reasonable facilities and services with a good quality of life. Last time I looked, Aberdeen was literally the most expensive place to live in the UK outside of London. Source: living in Aberdeen since 1990. I will also attest that Roseberry Topping is not a mountain, having walked up it then walked a further 34 miles in the same day.
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Feb 7, 2017 18:22
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namesake posted:Agreeing with Pissflaps on this page. If the deal is bad enough - and it will be - there is the possibility of a VONC.
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Feb 8, 2017 00:57
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Guavanaut posted:I'm thinking about checking the date on a can of something to spray on Paul Nuttall if he tries to come near my begonias. If it's out of date, just throw it.
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Feb 8, 2017 01:36
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Regarde Aduck posted:I know the electorate are a bunch of stupid mad dogs but I don't think it's reasonable to predict that Brexit is the complete disaster we suspect it will be AND have the Tories walking into power in 2020. If we hit full on recession we can count on 24 hour news channels to remind people every hour of every day. Remind people every hour of every day that the EU and immigrants are destroying our great nation because we stood up to them, and that lefties were willing to accept slavery rather than do that? You're right, they will.
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Feb 8, 2017 16:13
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ShaneMacGowansTeeth posted:the general election will be in 2020, and May wants trigger A50 in March (?) which means that we'll be out of the EU by 2019 May is going to present a deal that basically says "give us what we have now, but we don't pay EU dues". The EU are going to tell her to gently caress off, she will refuse to budge, the EU will say there's nothing to negotiate. We'll be out on WTO rules sucking Trump's dick and selling the NHS in six months.
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Feb 9, 2017 02:06
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hakimashou posted:Aside from forcing all the MPs to vote for his precious brexit and tanking their standing in the polls, what has Great Helmsman Corbyn managed to achieve in his time taking up space at the top of the Labour Party? He hasn't been a fuckwit making GBS threads up the UKMT.
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Feb 9, 2017 12:27
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Guavanaut posted:Didn't the Metro go through a phase of flat out reprinting Yahoo News articles with minor alterations, without spell (or fact) checking? The Metro is free. I'll cut them more slack than I will a paid publication. And they're all corrupt. A few years ago the Economist printed an article on the world's largest iron ore shippers that omitted the actual largest shipper because the company in question refused to pay to be mentioned.
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Feb 9, 2017 13:21
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Zephro posted:No they aren't. Vast swathes of Europe speak English well enough that you'll be fine for a few months until you can start picking up Danish/German/Swedish/Dutch or whatever And what do you do for a living in the meantime?
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Feb 9, 2017 14:17
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TinTower posted:The Tory manifesto also committed to the single market regardless of the referendum result, by the way. And Corbyn should be fighting on that basis: that May has no mandate to broker a deal which takes us out of the single market. This is something the Tories couldn't legitimately protest and would shore up the assertion that Labour want what is best for Britain as well as respecting the will of the people. But he isn't. He's letting her do as she pleases because it's easier.
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Feb 9, 2017 17:04
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Pochoclo posted:I know it's a super long shot but I'd really loving love to see an independent, EU-member Scotland gain all the prosperity that England will lose, just to spite all those loving brexiter racists. I'd also move there in a heartbeat because let's face it, Scotland is cool as heck. Scotland is megafucked whether it stays in the Union or not. The main reason to vote for independence is that if Scotland remains in the EU it will be easier to leave.
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Feb 10, 2017 17:00
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feedmegin posted:Also she'd be twenty years older and let's face it half of the reason for all the adulation is she died comparatively young and pretty. 56 year old Diana, married to a Muslim, probably fairly openspokenly liberal (she held hands with an AIDS patient in 1987, look at what rightwing press coverage of AIDS looked like back then), probably pro-Remain - they'd be doing their best to destroy her. It weirds me out a bit knowing that Claudia Christian from Babylon 5 had a small but fairly important role in the death of Diana.
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Feb 11, 2017 21:44
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Cerv posted:they had an on again off again relationship. if Christian hadn't walked out on Al Fayad when they'd been living together a year before the crash, then he presumably wouldn't have been out with Di that night This, basically. As I recall from her bio, he wanted kids and she wanted a career so she dropped him.
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Feb 12, 2017 00:34
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Guavanaut posted:Was there any time when there were four TV channels but no affordable home computers with the beep boop video games? ZX81 and the BBC's big 'get your kids a computer' was before Channel 4. The BBC Model B was pretty unaffordable for home use as the base unit plus required monitor would set you back close to £500. The ZX81 was much cheaper, but didn't have sound. However, the C64 and ZX Spectrum both launched before Channel 4 debuted in November 1982 and the Atari VCS had been out since 1978. So no, there was never a time when there were four channels and nobody had a home computer.
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Feb 13, 2017 00:39
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It's literally "he's gay". You can't even argue that there's a risk of him giving HIV to patients, they've already loving got it.
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Feb 14, 2017 13:13
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MikeCrotch posted:Holy lol at this Times quote from the outgoing Met commissioner's final speech: No, he's right. If a copper really needs to shoot someone the consequences have to take a back seat or he might be the one who gets shot. The problem is that coppers aren't being properly trained to know when shooting is necessary.
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Feb 14, 2017 15:48
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mfcrocker posted:What consequences??? Everyone knows you're the murdering copper bastard.
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Feb 14, 2017 16:04
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Jippa posted:Always a vote winning tactic along the lines of saying that jimmy savile was "misunderstood". You're seriously equating saying Hillsborough was not Woodstock with saying Savile was not a paedophile?
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Feb 15, 2017 10:59
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Oberleutnant posted:Blue Labour is Tory Labour. And Tory as UKIP Labour at that. Jedit's First Law of Socioanthropics applies: the likelihood that any given individual or group is racist rises directly with the surface area of all national flags they own and/or display. E: 1983 - famous Blue Labour politician Margaret Thatcher is reelected. Jedit fucked around with this message at 14:29 on Feb 15, 2017 |
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Feb 15, 2017 14:26
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Coohoolin posted:We all know that the only bad nationalism is the inclusive multicultural Scottish variant, and all forms of English or British imperial revanchism are good and proper. No, we know that all forms of nationalism are poison and the only redeeming feature of Scottish nationalism is that right now it'll kill you more slowly.
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Feb 16, 2017 12:48
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Tesseraction posted:Okay, so Labour's whipped opposition fails to pass. Article 50 passes with only Tory support. How well does Owen Smith do in the next election? Remember he's now splitting the pro-Remain vote with the Lib Dems (lol) Do you have a note tattooed on your leg reminding you to breathe? Opposing A50 does not prevent Brexit if the Tories three-line whip for it. But when it turns into a complete disaster as we all know will happen, Labour are in a position to say that they hold none of the responsibility for it because they whipped against it.
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Feb 17, 2017 15:20
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Tesseraction posted:"Why can't both sides just work together" is basically the theme song of Question Time, our window into the stupidity of our voting public. It's also your narrative.
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Feb 17, 2017 15:49
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Gort posted:The trick is to remember that it's Tony loving Blair, the architect of many of the problems we face today But not the architect of this one, which is arguably the biggest problem we've faced since the Second World War.
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Feb 18, 2017 14:06
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Irony Be My Shield posted:Reminder that Blair is now dramatically less popular than Corbyn due to his lying and maniacal warmongering. Hmm. Makes you wonder what would happen if Labour tried applying Blair's media tactics to a leader who isn't a warmongering liar.
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Feb 18, 2017 18:28
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Fangz posted:That's kinda a dumb dilemma because at this rate we'll have Brexit and be part of Trump's coalition of the willing for Operation Make Iran Great Again. That "and" should probably be stressed. If we stay in the EU we will probably be part of future American adventures in the Middle East anyway. If we leave, it will be certain because we'll be beholden to the US. We may as well stay rich.
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Feb 19, 2017 16:09
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Seaside Loafer posted:I strongly believe that a whole bunch of evil cunts opinions about everything could be changed if they just took half a pill one weekend when they didn't have anything to do the next day. Counterpoint: George Osborne.
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Feb 20, 2017 01:55
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Coohoolin posted:I've just sorted out a very cool placement for my journalism master's and I'm excited about the prospects this could lead to. Well, if it all goes tits up you can always write for the National.
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Feb 20, 2017 13:09
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Jeza posted:Trump is very pro-UK, the UK is in the middle of Brexit and looking for a stronger relationship with the US. Ah yes, the very pro-UK Donald Trump whose cabinet have vowed to backshaft us as hard as possible in any trade deal. Trump doesn't want to help us. He wants to own us. E: 21st February 1848 - first publication of The Communist Manifesto. Jedit fucked around with this message at 16:14 on Feb 21, 2017 |
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Feb 21, 2017 16:10
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Jeza posted:I'll wait and see on this one. In my opinion the right wing in America views the breakup/disruption of the EU as a favourable outcome, plus has traditionally supported the UK an ideological vassal state. It is also one of the only reasonable beneficial foreign policy relationship outcomes Trump can achieve and brag about. What matters most is how the UK will swing on Russia. I have a feeling if the UK is served a lovely deal in the EU, they will be forced into a warmer relationship with Russia/USA (and China on the side) as a kind of unholy political/economic pact. Simply out of pragmatism, and because it kicks the EU in the nuts. No. No pragmatism, no deal. He is an extreme right wing racist with literal white supremacists on his advisory team. I would rather leave this country forever and give up citizenship if necessary than take scraps from his table. And scraps is all we will get, be assured. Trump is a businessman, not a statesman, and a dishonest businessman at that. And Theresa May doesn't even have the aspirations of Satan: she would rather serve in hell than rule in heaven, so long as the devil lets her be evil.
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Feb 21, 2017 17:00
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MikeCrotch posted:Personally part of it is seeing a fellow democratically elected country slip towards tyranny, both because that's bad in and of itself (especially when it's a country as powerful as the US) and it sets a really nasty precedent, especially when your own democratic government is clearly looking to suck up and take cues from the fascist one. When your current leader did not win the leadership in an election, took charge of her party in what was only not a coup because the previous leader jumped before he was pushed, is a serial violator of human rights that wants to take the nation out of every treaty involving them, and is busy acting as if she has a mandate to do anything... That is not a precedent you want to follow.
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Feb 21, 2017 17:37
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oxford_town posted:is this an accurate statement? there were about 150 Polish pilots in the Battle of Britain and over 2,000 "British" pilots Obviously they didn't win the Battle of Britain outright, but they punched way above their weight. There were 71 squadrons involved in the Battle of Britain and 303 Squadron alone claimed 4.7% of the kills, putting them fourth highest overall and highest among the Hurricane squadrons. They also had the highest ratio of kills per pilot and the highest ratio of kills to losses. (Those numbers may also be excluding Josef Frantisek, the Czech pilot who flew with 303 as a guest and scored 17 kills while flying solo. If he isn't included in the official count then unofficially 303 was the second highest scoring.)
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Feb 23, 2017 20:59
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