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Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001


An image that sums up some of the most important news stories of 2020 so far.

With 0% of results reported for the Iowa Democratic Primary, Pete Buttgieg declared victory.

2019 thread

Willie Tomg posted:

A Belgian-Israeli billionaire diamond trader known for an extravagant lifestyle died during his penis enlargement surgery.

Taintrunner posted:

The website that is driving disaffected young white male youths to commit mass shootings is funded by a pig farmer selling audio recordings of his sex tourism escapades through the website that is owned by the richest man in the world.

Jose posted:

A US congressperson said the biggest innovation in recent times was Bin Laden flying 2 planes into the world trade centre

Willie Tomg posted:

The Straight Pride Parade has kicked off with an anime Sargon of Akkad body pillow

Willie Tomg posted:

Having a penis thrust in your face at a drunken dorm party may seem like harmless fun, but when Bret Kavanaugh did it to her, Deborah Ramirez says it confirmed that she didn't belong at Yale in the first place.

Ogantai posted:

The president's latest appointment to the Federal Education Board is a man who writes books about the Illuminati under the penname 'Magnus Incognito'.

Willie Tomg posted:

Boris Johnson hid in a fridge to escape journalists the day before the election.

Dreylad has issued a correction as of 19:09 on May 8, 2020

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Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001

Willie Tomg posted:

make this the beginning of the OP please



done

Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001
A Spanish porn star has been arrested on manslaughter charges following a man's death during a mystic ritual in which he inhaled psychedelic toad venom.

Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001
Saudi Arabia has pledged $500 million in aid for Yemen.

Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001

StashAugustine posted:

i'm too lazy to dig up the side by side headlines "indianapolis cop says someone took bite out of his cheeseburger" "cop forgot he took bite out of his cheeseburger"

Or more recently: A Massachusetts cop’s wife faked home invasion and blamed Black Lives Matter activists.

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Dreylad
Jun 19, 2001
Gonna leave the thread open a day or two to allow any good sentences that came in under the wire and then close it unless a mod does it first, and I'll create the next thread.

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