UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo

Who is your first pick in the deputy leadership race? This poll is closed.
R. Allin-Khan	6	1.60%
R. Burgon	80	21.33%
D. Butler	72	19.20%
A. Rayner	35	9.33%
I. Murray	5	1.33%
P. Flaps	177	47.20%
Total:	375 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

After a shite shift that went on two and a half hours longer than it should have everyone got into the van exhausted and grumpy then two owls flew in front of us and everyone perked right up. Owls are great.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2020 22:38

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# ¿ May 11, 2024 11:06

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Darth Walrus posted:

https://twitter.com/theharryshearer/status/1234881188650573825?s=21

lol holy poo poo

Tonight we ask "Are we expecting less from our politicians?"

# ¿ Mar 3, 2020 18:31

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Stunning

https://twitter.com/NevilleSouthall/status/1234466863482130443

# ¿ Mar 3, 2020 20:06

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Coronavirus: Student from Singapore hurt in Oxford Street attack

quote:

A student from Singapore has said he was beaten up by a group of men who told him: "I don't want your coronavirus in my country."

Jonathan Mok, 23, said he was walking down Oxford Street last Monday when he heard shouts of "coronavirus".

When he confronted the four men, he said, they launched a surprise attack that left him badly hurt.

The Met Police said it was treating the attack as "racially aggravated". No arrests have been made.

University College London student Mr Mok, who included pictures of his injuries in a widely shared Facebook post, said he was attacked at about 21:15 GMT near to Tottenham Court Road station.

Describing the attack, he wrote: "All of a sudden, the first punch was swung at my face and took me by surprise."

Mr Mok said his face was "exploding with blood" from the attack, which left him in "daze and shock".

He said the coronavirus outbreak has been used by some as an excuse to "further hatred for people different from them".

"I just think it's a pity to have such experiences taint the image of this beautiful city with so many nice people," Mr Mok added.

Up to a fifth of the workforce may be off sick during the peak of a coronavirus epidemic in the UK, the government has said in its latest plans.

Good to see us brits are being as sensible as ever.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2020 23:04

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Found out today that I have to pay a company �16 to get paid for the shifts I worked! What fresh hell is that? It can't be legal.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 10:50

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

yeah pretty sure if you're owed pay, you don't have to pay to get it. How did you find out? Is the company in question your employer or some payroll intermediary?

Payroll intermediary. I did shifts for McGinley, High Output and Colas and they give the cash to a company called "Payme" who I had to sign up with and am employed by them some how. It's Payme that take the �16 processing fee for me to get my money. The person at High Output I talked to said "don't worry it'll never get above �20 no matter how much you earn." I did want to say something back but it's not her doing so what would be the point.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 10:56

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

Well i can only suggest you check your contract, presumably you have a contract of some sort with payme too

Yes, I'm going to have to look through my e-mails for it.

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

If you're contracting, couldn't you add the payment to your invoice as 'expenses'?
Maybe those firms you did shifts for don't realize that you have to pay to get your money via payme?

They know, it was one of the ladies in the office that explained it to me. I don't think I can add it as expenses it would get queried.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 11:17

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

JeremoudCorbynejad posted:

Dunno if this applies but it at least gives a link to the institution you can complain to https://www.contractoruk.com/contracts/should_agency_be_charging_me_admin_fees.html

Thanks. Stuff like this makes me want to quit working on the rails and go bake bread.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 11:35

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Junkenstein posted:

Sounds like an umbrella payroll company. My understanding is that they 'employ' contractors and do PAYE for them, so contractors don't have to worry about self assessment etc. They then supply their staff to the companies/agencies who use them.

I think what's happening though is companies insist that any contractors sign up for their umbrella company of choice so that they only ever have to pay them, rather than the individual contractors. Normally, from what I've seen, the umbrella companies in this sort of case would make their money from the other companies. Sounds like they're making an extra bit of money from you though and it doesn't seem right because they're your employers. Is it a deduction on your payslip? Are you being invoiced for this 'processing fee'?

Sounds like you have the make up right. The deduction is on my payslip as "Company Overhead".

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 15:39

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Junkenstein posted:

They're probably fine to be charging you for doing what an umbrella payroll company is supposed to do, even though it wasn't your choice to seek them out and have no option but to be paid like that. Be interesting to see if they could give you a VAT invoice for this service they're providing you. Worth checking your contract(s).

*douses torch, puts down pitch folk* Oh, well, that has taken the wind out of my sails. It's �16 each week though loving capitalism.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2020 22:27

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Crankit posted:

Trains don't go on roads

What about Road-Rail Vehicles? I suppose you're going to tell me I'm "an idiot" and they're "not trains", well fair comment. Though when you;re working on them they do get called roads so you'll have someone talk about the "up road" and "down road" rather than the "up rail" and "down rail".

# ¿ Mar 6, 2020 10:05

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Communist Thoughts posted:

The pub I'm in has this guest Welsh red ale called Cwtch and this is a tasty ale, nice work, Wales!

One of the Tiny Rebel ales. It's supposed to be really good but i haven't tried it yet. I think it's only named that so you can go to the bar and say "give us a cwtch."

# ¿ Mar 6, 2020 18:40

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Iranian lawyer who defended women�s right to remove hijab gets 38 years, 148 lashes

quote:

After two trials described by Amnesty International as �grossly unfair,� Iranian human rights lawyer Nasrin Sotoudeh has been sentenced to a total of 38 years in prison and 148 lashes.

Sotoudeh, who has dedicated her life to defending Iranian women prosecuted for removing their hijabs in public, has been in the crosshairs of Iran�s theocratic government for years. In 2010, she was convicted of conspiring to harm state security and served half of a six-year sentence. Then, in June of last year, she was rearrested on an array of dubious charges. Tried in secret, details of her ordeal have often come via her husband, Reza Khandan, who wrote of her new, much harsher sentence on his Facebook page on Monday.

Sotoudeh was ultimately charged with seven crimes and given the maximum sentence for all of them. Five additional years were added from a 2016 case in which she was convicted in absentia. The total 38-year sentence was severe even by Iranian standards � a country often accused of human rights abuses, particularly involving women. Observers say it may signal a newly hardline approach to political dissent. Last week, a radical cleric linked to mass executions in the 1980s was appointed head of the Islamic Republic�s judiciary.

Critics from around the world decried the outcome of Sotoudeh�s case. Amnesty International said it was harshest sentence documented against a human rights defender in Iran in recent memory. Hadi Ghaemi, the executive director of the New York-based Center for Human Rights in Iran, told CBS News it exposed �the insecurity the regime has to any peaceful challenge.�

The same day Sotoudeh was sentenced, the UN investigator on human rights in Iran held up her case as a sign of the country�s increasingly brutal oppression of those who defend the rights of women. �Worrying patterns of intimidation, arrest, prosecution, and ill-treatment of human rights defenders, lawyers, and labor rights activists signal an increasingly severe state response,� he said.

That's pretty insane.

# ¿ Mar 8, 2020 14:28

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Blind man with guide dog punched by van driver

quote:

A blind man walking with his guide dog was punched repeatedly when he asked a van driver to move off the pavement to enable him to pass.

Tony Webb, 73, was attacked in Bishop's Stortford in Hertfordshire at about 09:00 GMT on Sunday.

His daughter posted a photograph of his black eye which has been shared by more than 15,000 people on social media.

She said he was recovering at home but was very shaken and was "petrified" of going outside.

Tracy Hassell, who said her father can see some light and dark, wrote on Facebook: "My blind dad was attacked in Bishop's Stortford town centre this morning at 9am by a man... who was parked on the pavement in a white van."

'Didn't believe he was blind'
She told the BBC: "Dad asked the driver if he would move so he and Sammy, his guide dog, could get past, but the man said 'no'.

"Dad asked him again and said it was out of order to park on the pavement, and the next thing he knew he was pushed up against the van - he thinks he was punched three times in his eye.

"The man even told my father he didn't believe he was blind."

Stuff like this really pisses me off, we are so poo poo with disability in this country.

# ¿ Mar 9, 2020 18:46

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Was replacing some rail over the weekend and at one point a badger came down to the fence near where we were working and just sat down and watched us for five minutes :3:

I forget how big they are in real life.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 13:17

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Magner posted:

Hello there UKMT, long time lurker but I thought I'd tell you about my current coronavirus situation.

I'm a cadet on board a container ship. To complete the cadetship and get qualified as a marine engineer you have to do a certain amount of time working at sea. Right now I need about 3 days of sea time. Unfortunately the company operating the ship has suspended crew transfers at all its ports of call. I get the same training allowance whether I'm on ship, on leave or at college so I'm looking at god knows how many months of forced, unpaid labour.

Cadets are by definition non-essential crew. I do not need to be on this ship and nobody would need to replace me, so bringing someone infected on board needn't be a concern.

The monthly allowance I get is considerably less than minimum wage for an apprentice for the amount of hours I work.

Funny thing is I was supposed to be done by now but the company had me start my last trip a week later because they were too cheap to fly me to the port I was meant to get on at.

All of that and the captain just told me off for not greeting him with sufficient enthusiasm.

Wait, is this in the armed forces? If it's not I'd laugh my arse off if someone said that to me.

Biggus Dickus posted:

I always imagine them the size of a Big Trak. I think that's more me being impressed at the size of the latter when I was a yoof, though.

I don't know why but I keep thinking of them as the size of domestic cats but fatter. I know they're bigger but that image is stuck in my head.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 13:40

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

RockyB posted:

I'm assuming merchant navy: https://www.ucas.com/ucas/after-gcses/find-career-ideas/explore-jobs/job-profile/merchant-navy-engineering-officer

Sounds like a poo poo position to be in mate. Good luck, hopefully they remember to keep sending you food.

Of course.

Magner posted:

Nope, merchant navy. Purely civilian. One of the many, many reasons I didn't join the Royal Navy was to avoid this kind of bullshit.

Seems pretty poo poo then mate, hope you work with a decent bunch of lads?

# ¿ Mar 17, 2020 14:19

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

My mum is starting to take this coronavirus thing seriously. If I want to visit I can't have gone to the cinema or gym that day and the first thing I have to do when I go in the house is wash my hands. Which seems reasonable to me considering shes in a vulnerable group though one of my brothers had a grumble about it.

bump_fn posted:

how is weed not legal on this stupid island yet

is it even legalised in scotland

Someone once said marijuana to me and now I have a 10 pint a day heroine habit.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2020 10:19

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Necrothatcher posted:

Just found out that one of my friend's relatives was one of the Welsh patients who died this week. Said friend is now trying to run a GP surgery practically on her own with no receptionists or secretaries.

I'm sorry to hear that. That's a lot of work they've put on their shoulders.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2020 11:14

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Necrothatcher posted:

oh poo poo oh gently caress I just got told I am on the verge of being declared a "key worker" because I did some stupid course on digital court hearings last year.

please don't make me a key worker I just want to stay home locked down and play doom

It's no good you've been labeled, you are now a key worker. It's you, anyone in health or who works for Timpsons.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2020 19:42

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

RockyB posted:

Saw this in the Corona thread and thought of bidet chat:

https://i.imgur.com/lNs7hAH.mp4

Cracks me up every single drat time.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2020 21:16

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

I think the panic buying has finally stopped, I was in Iceland and while it was packed nobody seemed to be hoarding anything, most people were using baskets. Also I sneezed and a kid from the next isle over shouted "bless you."

# ¿ Mar 20, 2020 12:50

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

COVID-19 has given me a new appreciation of automatic doors.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 10:43

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Putting in an order with ASDA is testing my patience right now. Started the order then got put in a queue. An hour later I could finish my order but now when I try and pay the card check is timing out.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 16:05

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Nettle Soup posted:

Don't know if you fixed this, but the other day when I was registering a new card, I had to go into my account settings and add the card there, instead of doing it on the checkout screen.

No haven't fixed it. i didn't need to add the card that's been on there for a while but the check after you press the pay button (done by Barclays) is timing out. Though now the website is just saying that there are too many people using it and I'm in a queue.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 20:31

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Guavanaut posted:

I did belt out a couple of verses of Calon L�n while gardening this morning.

Tsietisin posted:

I love that Hey Duggee appears to have been made by old school ravers

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K05N2jqFHc8

That explains this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UW_fHm7SQo

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 16:07

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

They've turned the rugby ground near me into a testing centre for the NHS staff and my mums beginning to panic a bit so I've been trying to calm her down. Have I got it right that you're less likely to catch the virus as long as you don't have an infected person breath/cough on you and you don't touch a surface infected with the virus and then touch your face?

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 19:54

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

sassassin posted:

It's incredibly unlikely you'll get it otherwise but you can never know if a person is infected (and should assume everyone is including yourself) or surface has been touched.

She's staying in but thinks that if people who may have it walk past the house then she'll be at high risk and I just wanted to assure her she's over reacting.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 20:10

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Barry Foster posted:

Yeah no she'll be fine, it's not airborne

Thanks.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 20:25

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

I know nothing about this clapping thing and thought my city had put on a late night marathon or something.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 21:04

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Just been into town and it was pretty deserted the people that were there were pretty good trying to stand 2 meters apart where possible. Only black spot was one prick that after finishing a phone call decided to push in between me and the guy in front of me in the line to get into Iceland. Police didn't help much, I don't know what level of English the guy had but he seemed to mostly ignore them and they eventually told me to move back and let him push in. However, the Boris news has cheered me up immensely.

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 13:46

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

The police have turned away caravans and campervans heading for Pembrokeshire. It's crazy, it's not as if Wales has a plethora of ICU beds. Someone suggested ICU should now stand for I Cymry yn Unig - For Welsh Only (Though the soft mutation would change it to I Gymry yn Unig, but you all already know that.) It is crazy that people are still treating it as if it's an excuse to 'get away'.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 11:20

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Saw a sign in a shop window that read "We are open from 9:30am to 12 am and 2pm to 5:30pm" sometimes it's the little things that get you through.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 14:58

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

I expect you'll all be out clapping - ahem:

https://twitter.com/McCartneyMaxwel/status/1243809333135228928?s=20

A sarcastic clap, yes.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 20:53

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

I just bough a roll of black bags and on the side it has the category Strength: Standard, Strong, Very Strong and Ultimate Strength, with Ultimate Strength ticked. Should I get it registered as a lethal weapon?

# ¿ Mar 29, 2020 14:17

bessantj: Jul 27, 2004

Answers Me posted:

https://twitter.com/LloydCymru/status/1244345267668819969

Are they testing more in Wales than in England? Because uhh they're dominating the charts

Aneurin Bevan represent!!! Not the first time I've wished I lived somewhere else tbh.

Also, even though we knew about what was happening in northern Italy we still had a northern Italian rugby team, Treviso, come over and play a match in Newport. Good job everyone.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2020 22:13