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Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Shimrra Jamaane posted:

I can’t believe we’re really doing this.

I can, I just also believe it's going to crash and burn.

I've been mostly checked out this offseason, and don't see that changing much, but yeah, I'll watch some games and see how that goes.

Anyway, Robert Mays's new podcast has started, and so far has previewed the NFC North and AFC East.

https://twitter.com/robertmays/status/1300777391296516097

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Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



From the same mind that released this over the weekend:

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001




https://twitter.com/DonteStallworth/status/1300865707517923328

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Kirk Cousins has always had Adam Carolla energy

https://twitter.com/adamcarolla/status/1300661191736356865

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Sanu came in, looked good for like 1 game, destroyed his ankle, and now he's gone.

welp.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



sourdough posted:

10-81-1 on 14 targets, then some really beautiful games lol. 2-4-0 on 4 targets, 3-14-0 on 5 targets, 2-13-0 on 8 targets. It was a massive waste of a 2nd even before the injury

The injury was immediately after the 10-81 game, his 2nd with the Pats, at which point he was a corpse, yeah.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



sourdough posted:

oh hah, didn't realize, figured it was once he stopped playing in games, not that he played on his busted ankle

Yeah, it was one of those, well that's a high ankle sprain, and then he... missed one game and just looked sad out there.

Which is how every Pats WR looked over the last two months, just... lame.


Kinda curious to see if the absolute burying he's received over the last few days was even a little real or not.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Yeah, I miss incredibly stupid Omar takes.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



#Blessed content

https://twitter.com/deshaunwatson/status/1301638171499868160

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



I think the second you hit that 8th digit on a contract, you're required to do at minimum a chestbump when you get the okay, fax over the paperwork phone call.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001




NC-17 really killed it.

A joke so good I went and bought a steak then busted out a christmas themed plate just to make a joke.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Just putting this here so we can all associate this with Odell for the rest of time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hy8kmNEo1i8

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Ooof

https://twitter.com/FourVerts/status/1303339873508691969

I mean granted it's for that whole armed robbery thing, but still, oof.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



.... huh

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001




The video game equivalent of painting Black Lives Matter in rainbow paint colors on a street

https://twitter.com/JordanHeckFF/status/1303398100271325184

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Spoeank posted:

https://twitter.com/SethWalder/status/1303351463737991169

ESPN this is when you quietly scrap your metric

If you want something fun, here's Bryan Burke trying to explain himself using two plays.

A draw and a zone run where Donald penetrates so thoroughly that the runner has to cut back then squeezes past a linebacker's gently caress up.

https://twitter.com/bburkeESPN/status/1303384685423325184

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



The Big Jesus posted:

Question from a dude who has never owned a madden game: is it not the same engine they're running it on for multiple years? If it's the same engine I don't see how it could get randomly buggy.

Super short version is every game engine is a pile of messy sacrifices coded by a bunch of geniuses and a bunch of monkeys, are too large for anybody to have a clear picture of everything that's going on, and made out of 90% unfinished implementations of incorrect assumptions in a design document somewhere.

Then you keep using that engine and grafting more things to it. You have 1200 open bugs from the previous release and the new version needs to add in a bunch of new functions each of which you have no idea how they'll interact with those existing bugs and straight up contradict the assumptions from the original design.

And that's a normal situation, in Madden's case, they're using the Frostbite engine, which was originally developed to be used for the Battlefield FPS games, so all the sports stuff is hacks on top of hacks on top of hacks, and changing anything causes a house of cards to crumble.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



He looks like 12 year old pitcher that dominates every Little League World Series.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

Teams have barely left camp and the season hasn't even started yet! Little early to be counting those chickens.

It's also a couple of days after a 20 year old college player died of covid.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



axeil posted:

I thought Defector was going to be subscriber only?

Really glad it isn't, I love old Deadspin and it seems like the new site is just like the old Deadspin.


Probably the Lions@Eagles game from I think 2013 where it snowed like 8 inches during the game. I was at that game with my ex, it was pretty miserable.

I think it'll be subscriber only, but probably want to keep stuff free while word spreads that, hey it's the Deadspin you used to love.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/1304099252482854913



shirts and skins posted:

wow so we're just allowing vore fetishes in tff now?

Yes, this has always been a pro-Vince Wilfork forum.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Chinatown posted:

Tom Br*dy did 9/11

No he's 14-4 against the Jets in NY.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



I didn't watch last night's game, because football is cancelled! in that I fell asleep on my couch then woke up and glanced at the score so decided to play video games instead.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



I don't know how after the last 6 months that anyone could have faith in any part of a vaccine rollout in the US being competent or functional.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



https://twitter.com/AdamSchefter/status/1305158177063829511

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Oh god Lions, I didn't know this is what you lost the game on

https://twitter.com/JeffEisenband/status/1305241119001915392

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



Ben Baldwin's ranking system which is obviously good and true and has the Chiefs and Jaguars as roughly equal teams with the Bears after 1 game.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



That chart tells us that the Buccaneers played way better then the Saints which is obvious, duh.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



ASAPRockySituation posted:

The Patriots having high EPA on both sides of the ball is a bit of a surprise given how the offense looked with Cam. I guess they did a lot more on the ground than I noticed.

Turns out when you end a game with 217 yards rushing, none of them individually have to look very impressive.

I didn't think the number was anywhere near that, because the rushing totals are pretty lol

Cam 15 / 75
Sony Michael 10 / 37
Rex Burkhead 7 / 32
JJ Taylor 4 / 28
Edelman 1 / 23
James White 5 / 22

I know the Pats are typically bad in fantasy leagues outside of Brady / Gronk, but this year might be really something.

Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



fsif posted:

Yeah, the game also ended really early. Probably literally just fewer plays run than in a typical game.

Yeah, sure was nice to cut into 3 more games before the brodcast ended because there were still like 8 minutes to go in some games when it wrapped up.

The Pats having a 12 play, nearly 8 minute drive that ended with a fumble through the endzone sure did wonders to shorten that game.

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Kalli
Jun 2, 2001



The Puppy Bowl posted:

Ben Baldwin chart has Seahawks as the best team in the league. Shocking.

That's just EPA which is pretty straight forward, you want to add in his completion percentage stat to get to his DAKOTA rankings which is where the magic is. I'm really just posting this only to lol at Wentz.

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