Final Fantasy VII Remake: the water farting chocobo

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Final Fantasy VII Remake: the water farting chocobo

Who?
	Barret
	Red XIII
	Yuffie
	Cait Sith
	Vincent
	Cid

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Holy poo poo, literally opening the game with Aerith dying as the White Materia falls to the ground and bounces is just sheer loving cheek. (And it feels very silly to be spoiler-tagging something that happens within 15 minutes of hitting New Game, but not everyone has their copy and not everyone who bought digital has played it yet, so better to err on the side of politeness.) Yes, Nomura, "Are we really gonna kill Aerith again? Did we dare to do it even with all of you knowing what's coming, or did we dare to mess with the single most iconic moment in all of Final Fantasy history" is the question hanging over this entire game, we know.

Anyway I have to sleep and then do a job because apparently I'm not allowed to play video games if I don't have any money and/or am dead, which is obnoxious, but what can you do. First hour or so is pretty fun, doesn't seem like they messed with a working formula, and I can only assume the very long pause and blackout screen every time you sit on a bench to restore your HP/MP is a stylistic choice? Because there's no way it's a hardware thing and it somehow feels even longer than it did in Remake.

# ¿ Feb 29, 2024 10:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 12, 2024 19:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Namnesor posted:

Anyone who's good at freestyling the piano minigame, in the flashback in the full version I love the rugpull that Tifa's theme isn't actually available at that moment so you're left to wail on your own which leads to the group roasting Cloud for wasting their time, but do they still compliment Cloud if you can cobble together something passable on your own?

Um... something is going on there? They gave me the "you're so talented!" lines after I just hit the keys aimlessly and played with the options and then closed the piano back up.

# ¿ Feb 29, 2024 18:12

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

ImpAtom posted:

Little do you know S-E included their own music-judging AI and we're all the testbed for it.

After this absolute lunatic dev team looked at an instance where Cloud walks by a piano once and apparently dismissed "he doesn't interact with it", "he has a minor interaction where he hits a few keys at random", and even "he plays it and the player gets a rhythm minigame" in favor of "let's put in a fully featured piano simulator that can be controlled by a gamepad", I am not prepared to put anything past them.

# ¿ Feb 29, 2024 19:32

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Oh, this game big big.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed at all the different systems they've thrown at me and I got to Chadley and went up against Titan and he kicked my loving rear end, which has me worried, because I've been able to faceroll every overworld mob so far. Like, yes, I understand that they want me to go find his summon crystals to make him weaker, but that fight was level synced and he was loving two-shotting my entire team while laughing off my attacks. I'm worried that it's a signal I'm going to do bad at any fight that requires tactics.

Also why does my minimap/tracker frequently have the word "Destination" on it, apparently centered right on wherever I am at the moment? It goes away sometimes, but rarely, and it's very distracting. Am I just getting a weird bug?

# ¿ Mar 1, 2024 07:31

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Ytlaya posted:

Is it usually a good idea to save up 2 bars on everyone before executing a bunch of actions? I normally mostly use the bars as they come up since I'm afraid of capping and "wasting ATB," but this might be suboptimal.

I have no loving idea, but it definitely wasn't in Remake or InterMISSION. You need your ATB to, y'know, do things, so if there's something that needs doing right now... spend that poo poo. Especially on abilities or anything that doesn't cost MP. Fights that take less time are fights that take less resources and do less damage that needs to be healed also with resources.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2024 07:46

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

In FF7 original, Tifa recognized Cloud at Nibelheim, right? Or am I misremembering? Her line to Aerith about Cloud not being there at all is bugging me because I thought she knew he was the trooper, they have some interactions.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2024 10:40

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I now have 9 hours of playtime and am still on Chapter 2. Is this because as soon as they gave me a chocobo and an open map full of sidequests, I ran off and ignored the plot entirely? Yes. But still an impressive number.

Blankspace posted:

one of the guys who worked on the early Assassin's Creed does design consultation now & here's his explanation:

Yeah, but why a tower specifically? It is always a tower.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2024 07:56

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Oh poo poo, Fort Condor is in this game too? I had a blast playing FF7 DotA with Yuffie in intermission.

Also, I say this with love, but did anyone on the dev team have even a single idea that Square said "no, we're not putting that into the game" to?

# ¿ Mar 3, 2024 08:16

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Quick question: Do I have to do anything with the skill books I sometimes get at the bookstore or vending machines? I noticed they give SP right away when you get them, but then they just... sit in your inventory forever and do nothing? It's a weird choice.

Also, what is Cloud supposed to do about aerial enemies? Aerith and Barret shoot, Tifa's synergy skills launch her airborne, and I just don't play Red XIII much, but Cloud seems somewhat SOL here. I had a tremendously hard time against the ocean terror boss in Under Junon just because I couldn't get to his hovering rear end for half of it. (I'm mostly playing Cloud and his harem right now but I think I'm gonna swap Aerith for Yuffie when I get her, because Aerith just takes forever to build ATB.)

On a writing note, I'm so impressed by the love triangle stuff so far. Cloud and Tifa are spikey and uncomfortable when they're alone together, you can feel how much history there is and how they've both hurt each other in the past and how much each one matters to the other and how they're terrified of actually facing that because holy poo poo, it'll hurt so much, any honest talk would require acknowledging all the bleeding wounds they've still got that they're both trying very hard to ignore. And on the flip side, everything about Aerith is easy. She's always happy to hang out with you, she thinks you're great, whatever you want to do is great, the way you are right now is great, any decisions you make are great, she's gonna be perky and flirty and always supportive of you no matter what. Which makes her feel fake. She's a magical girlfriend, she's wish fufilment, this is not a real relationship. Cloud and Tifa feel very real.

I was ride or die for Cloud/Aerith in the original but... man, I do not know what I'm gonna have Cloud do at the Golden Saucer right now. And if they're holding close enough to the original plot, the weird vibes I'm getting off Aerith make perfect sense because she doesn't love Cloud, she's loving Zach's shadow, and a shadow isn't real.

# ¿ Mar 5, 2024 21:37

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

ImpAtom posted:

Dodge and attack with Cloud to shoot blade beams or Dodge and hold attack to make Cloud zoom towards even a flying enemy or use Disorder while in Punisher mode to launch yourself into the air or use a Synergy with Barrett/Red XIII to batter bullets at enemies.

History Comes Inside! posted:

Dodge and then start hitting square and your sword will start firing off blasts of energy because ???

Okay, thanks. That reminds me, is there any indicator of which synergy attack skills are just use once, which are "this is a three hit combo if you do it in rhythm", and which you're supposed to hold the button to charge up the attack?

Oxxidation posted:

I don�t really get that feeling from aerith in this, especially at the saucer and costa del sol �dates.� she�s perky as usual but there�s a wry exasperation to her attempts to reach out now, as she tries to do anything to get cloud to open up a little - not even romantically, just to make sure the guy has a pulse

I'm still in Junon right now, so maybe. Right now the experience is every interaction with Tifa somehow degenerating into either a fight or the two of them talking past each other about their respective wounds while Aerith is at a constant level of "teehee! this is fun, you're so wonderful, let's go on dates!"

# ¿ Mar 5, 2024 21:44

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

guts and bolts posted:

It has come to my attention that the chief complaint about this game among some of the review outlets is that there's, uh, too much game in it, I guess, which just continues my desyncing from reality. I read somewhere, and I can't remember exactly where because I entered a fugue state upon seeing it, that the new FF7 games are "adjacent" to live-service games, because... there's... more than one of them? I don't actually know. Lesson learned.

This is a frankly psychotic take and the people responsible need to be medicated.

Unless I'm missing the roadmap where Costa Del Sol rolls out in six months and I need to get grinding on my battle pass to unlock Cid, I suppose, I could be just missing those menus.

# ¿ Mar 6, 2024 00:49

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

If you noped out of the Queen�s Blood tournament on the cruise ship, just know that you made a terrible mistake. Everything about that was amazing.

# ¿ Mar 6, 2024 09:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Thundarr posted:

This is incredibly true. Do the QB tourney, guys.

It's a good thing wheelies just kind of bounce harmlessly off people because otherwise everybody in Costa del Sol would have shattered shins.

Wheelies are such a prime example of this game apparently saying "yes" to every idea.

"Okay, so they're in a coastal resort town, right? I was on vacation recently and I saw a thing where you can rent Segways, can we put that in as a traversal mechanic with its own dedicated control scheme complete with force feedback on the buttons?"
"Don't see why not?"
"And can we track distance traveled with them so that they can have pedometer displays for no good reason?"
"Of course."
"Actually, can we give people prizes for making the pedometer number go up?"
"You didn't even have to ask, get to work on that poo poo."

Pennfalath posted:

You still get the ending scenes of the tournament, even if you forfeit (tested it out in hard mode before reloading and beating everyone).

Which ones? All the matches are great because you get a collection of weirdos in round 1, have to pick a love interest's rear end to kick in round 2, round 3 is a Wall Market reunion, round 4 is against loving Chadley lmao, and round 5 pays off that snotty bitch from the start of the tournament. But if you don't get to see Red XIII dancing like Michael Jackson, what's the goddamn point.

Taima posted:

I'll tell yall one thing

If I'm choosing friends I'm choosing the people who like all the minigames. Cuz you're like me. And we like things

The hardest part of the game so far was leaving behind my seventh infantry homeboys qq

Strong agree on both. They'd better be back in part 3!

# ¿ Mar 6, 2024 23:08

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Pennfalath posted:

Even if you forfeit the tournament or lose, you get to see the final scene you described here.

Oh, well, you should still do it.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 01:03

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Gologle posted:

It really doesn't make much sense how the black robed dudes are at some of these locations and I think I love it?

I'm only on Chapter 6, but I don't think it's supposed to? Cloud and the gang have already commented several times on how the robe guys have flat loving disappeared even though there was nowhere to go and then they show up somewhere else they had no possible way of getting to.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 02:30

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

SettingSun posted:

I can�t seem to get the hang of QB. These opponents at the Crow�s Nest destroy me easily with either pre-built available to me. I�d make my own deck but I�d just be throwing random cards together since I can�t grasp the strategy.

Control the board; the cards will take care of themselves.

Waiting for your opponent to put a pawn on a square you can claim is the core of the game because then you can play and flip control of that square. And if they can�t play anywhere that�d let them reclaim it, then that square is yours and you can leave it empty while you go contest other pawns. Contrariwise, don�t put your pawns next to squares where your opponent has pawns if you can help it, because that�s just begging them to play on their square and flip your pawn.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 04:26

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

HD DAD posted:

Seriously, the segways are a public safety hazard. Those fuckers go way too fast.

If they didn't want me to knock down everyone's tables and drag a chair with me for 100 meters, they wouldn't have made the handling so loving bad.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 19:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Quinton posted:

Seems like a pity they don't have a hybrid graphics setting... give me the nicer looking 30fps stuff in cutscenes and photo mode and the Performance stuff for gameplay.

And on thate note, God I wish photo mode was better. Let us properly free-move the camera anywhere we want, adjust character poses and equipment, and plop down extra light sources. I have so many good screenshots that could have been great ones.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 20:49

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

GateOfD posted:

right now having trouble getting the AI to heal me and I seem to always manually tell them to cure me.
granted it is the beginning of the game, so i don't have all the resource perks to use abilities as I like

That's intentional behavior. They won't heal you on their own; the game wants you to be switching characters constantly to build bar and use abilities. The thought process should be that there aren't AI characters, you control the entire party, just one at a time. That said, you can get an Auto-Cast materia and link it to a Healing materia and that'll get them to spend their bar on Cure if you need it... but ATB gain is vastly decreased when you're not controlling someone, so if you need a heal, the best play is still to switch to your healer and get some bar.

Augus posted:

square pls chill with the unreal engine auto-exposure I can't see dick in this jungle

No Mods No Masters posted:

Yakuza 8 was also really bad about this so I am now categorizing it as a AAA JRPG thing more broadly

It's a way to hide loading iirc. Your character's eyes adjust once the game has loaded in the new textures.

# ¿ Mar 7, 2024 23:46

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Grizzled Patriarch posted:

Yeah, the game feels like it's trying to flesh out some of this stuff in some ways, but ends up making other plot elements feel even more nonsensical. Same thing with (Costa del Sol spoilers) Hojo, where he tries to literally kidnap the entire party to take them to his torture dungeon *again* and afterwards there's some wishy-washy line about just letting him go. Or interrupting Yuffie's assassination attempt on Rufus, which made way more sense than the parade scheme.

The latter makes sense, though. Rufus is in the middle of offering the group complete amnesty and all of Shinra off their rear end forever in exchange for killing Sephiroth, which is what they've been trying to do anyway, and he'll even presumably be offering assistance with that, even if it's just intel. So they get everything they want and give up nothing, it's the prize deal to end all deals. Barret even says out loud "not now" when he sees Yuffie starting to make her move; if she does it while Cloud, Tifa, and Aerith are right there on stage, he knows drat well who's gonna get the blame for it.

# ¿ Mar 8, 2024 02:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Capfalcon posted:

I don't think that's correct. As I recall, they were originally heading up there to shake him down for info by winning the presidential commendation and getting up close and personal.

It's both. They first get the idea about heading up when Yuffie mentions her assassination and they're like "that seems like it'd serve our interests too, wonder if we can help" and then Cloud gets the idea to get a face to face meeting and hopefully at least clarify where they stand right now, since the Turks were sending mixed messages.

# ¿ Mar 8, 2024 02:46

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Grizzled Patriarch posted:

That's fair, but they're still wanted criminals with what is, based on the amount of gil in my inventory, roughly a billion dollar bounty on their heads and their mugshots plastered everywhere, and anyone who isn't staunchly anti-Shinra thinks they are basically ISIS, so I'm not sure how much it would really matter if they also got blamed for that. Also kinda weird that Heidegger took the shuriken for him - he seems to be an opportunistic yes-man more than a true believer, and wouldn't Rufus dying basically de-facto put him in charge?

But if Yuffie doesn�t throw her shuriken and they get to shake Rufus� hand and walk away, those bounties and mugshots disappear. That�s what he was offering.

# ¿ Mar 8, 2024 04:03

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

�One�s not a party, it�s a pity!�

girls I did not purchase this video game to be personally attacked

# ¿ Mar 8, 2024 05:34

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I realize that this is the video game incarnation of "You didn't have to go that hard" but holy poo poo the Gold Saucer is overwhelming.

Also, I assume being offered a level 39 challenge in the colisseum when I'm level 30 is a "come back later, dummy" signal?

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 08:12

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

TeaJay posted:

So how is the game? Is it not worth picking up if one is a gurmudgeon for remakes adding too much new stuff and characters? So far I've heard from friends is that there is a lot of characters, events and open world stuff that wasn't there in the original, but is the actual remade part done well?

Nobody who had a single idea for anything to be added to the game was told �no� at any point in the entire development process. It is the most Video Game. If you liked Remake and wanted more, this is much, much more. If you didn�t like Remake, oh boy will you hate this. If you didn�t play Remake, you need to do that first, because let�s just say they did some tweaks to the plot and you really can�t just drop in to Disc 2 here and follow what�s going on.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 09:50

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

TeaJay posted:

Yeah I mean I didn't play the remake but I read stuff and know what's the deal with it. I guess I was looking for "the same but with better graphics" and as I understood the first one wasn't really it, but I still had to try and look for information if they went even more overboard with adding new stuff or if they toned it down. I guess I can already see what the answer is.

I feel like there�s a vast gulf between reading about Remake and experiencing it � the combat is terrific, the cutscenes are charming, the whole thing is a massive spectacle. But toned it down? Oh my, no. More like we all thought Remake was Maximum Nomura, and Nomura was like �fools, this isn�t even my final form, this is what it�s like to go EVEN FURTHER BEYOND!!!� and then he screamed for 15 minutes until his hair grew really long and his eyebrows disappeared, and that is Rebirth.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 10:01

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

That might be a discussion for the spoiler thread? Please spare my only on Chapter 8 self.

Also, Aerith showed up to escort me around the Gold Saucer. I don't know why, but I thought I was going to get to actively pick my date -- curse my policy of being nice to my entire party at every opportunity!

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 18:20

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Ror posted:

There are two Gold Saucer segments if you remember from the original, the official date-date happens when you go back the second time. I don't think you get an active pick, I'm not there yet either, but you still have time if you want to change some of the relationship levels.

I refuse to stop being nice! I can always go back and replay it with the dates I want afterwards.

Fedule posted:

I don't understand how Yuffie does not have a permanent case of fractured rear end from how she slams onto benches

Ancient Wutaian art of benchjitsu :hai:

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 18:54

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Arist posted:

Ha, if you go back to Fort Condor with Yuffie in your party she'll mention she's a grandmaster

Yeah, I thought "you won't be able to come back to Junon for a while" meant "we're gonna do the whole infiltration sequence and marching minigame", not "we're unavoidably shipping your rear end to Costa Del Sol before you can come back", so I didn't do any Fort Condor until I had Yuffie, and she said the same thing.

I also had Tifa being called the pull-up queen, and while it was true for me that Tifa beat Jules in pull-ups and Yuffie beat Chadley at Fort Condor, what I wonder is, does the game read your previous saves to load those dialogues in, or do the characters always act like you finished all the minigames?

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 23:05

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I just started Chapter 9 and got to the town, this game so ungodly big. Yuffie has a lovely singing voice.

loving Cissnei and Zach's parents though, hell yeah.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2024 07:39

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Well, Chapter 9 deserves its reputation. What the gently caress is going on, what just happened.

Also Cloud we all know you�re crazy, it�s why we love you, you still gotta take it down like three notches.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2024 01:26

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Holy poo poo, the Head On biological challenge can go right back to hell, where it was forged in the first place. What the gently caress.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2024 08:57

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Okay so there is one (1) sidequest where Cloud is asked to pick three mushrooms. So, naturally, picking mushrooms has its own dedicated minigame.

This game is so maximalist that it goes into self-parody and then keeps elevating until it loops back around into being pure art.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 04:29

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

cubicle gangster posted:

What's the gimmick to the scarlet fight in the gongaga reactor?
I've already beat her but it sucked a huge amount of poo poo, it's the first main story boss I've died to and it took me 3 tries. Every other one I've enjoyed but immediately into my first run on that, before I even found out I was going to lose, it wasn't fun and I couldn't figure out what I was supposed to be doing to gain control of things.
Ended up using TWENTY mega potions to get through it (the first time I've used one so far) just because every single attack seemed to cut through defense and take off 1k HP and building atb/wasting mana on cures was a nightmare.

Hit her hands. Destroying one weakens her attacks, destroying both pressures her and pops Scarlett out for a free stagger and then you can wail on her.

Are you Assessing every enemy and boss you see? You should be, it tells you how to pressure them.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 05:38

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Intellectually, I understand that Chadley has a "World Intel collection has stalled" spiel as a player nudge. Emotionally, I want to dropkick the robotic bastard right into Sephiroth's rear end every time I hear it. World Intel collection has stalled because I walked into a new town and got railroaded into doing plot poo poo for 5 hours straight, Chadley, I didn't design the loving game.

Come to think of it, that really strict delineation between plot poo poo and open world is one of the game's few design flaws. You are either dicking around on an open map doing meaningless sidequests, or you've walked into the next "plot beat here" marker on your map and the walls have closed in on you and the open world won't be given back until you're done. No middle ground.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 19:20

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

WaltherFeng posted:

I get what you are saying but talking about sidequests as meaningless is how you get FF13. Sidequests in FF7R are generally pretty good

Oh, they are both good and fun. But the Word Intel stuff is meaningless. You don't get any extra opportunities to hang out with your party or learn anything, no ongoing subplots are being served (with the weak exception of the protorelic). The story does not change one jot or tittle if I do or do not beat up that group of fiends who are slightly different from the fiends I've already been beating up, and if I find or do not find a cache or transmuter chip, the only thing that changes is my inventory.

Contrast that to the actual sidequests, the ones you pick up on community boards. Those tend to be focused around a single party member and give them a scene or two to shine and show off their personalities, and you get a relationship boost at the end.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 21:33

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Now that I know that �I am so, so bored� is to the tune of Yuffie�s theme I can�t unhear it, and I must share this cursed knowledge with all of you.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2024 04:35

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

McTimmy posted:

Oh sweet merciful heavens inverse controls in Glide de Chocobo.

Is that an option? Did they patch that in?

# ¿ Mar 21, 2024 07:56

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I love so much that there's a running gag where Yuffie gets violently motion-sick if placed on literally anything that moves... unless it's a chocobo, in which case she immediately switches to YAY WHEE LET'S GO FAST AND JUMP OFF OF THINGS.

And then Cloud gets dialogue where he straight up asks her what's with that, because he noticed the disconnect too.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2024 19:20

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 12, 2024 19:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

If I'm remembering right, OG Yuffie steals your materia like right after you meet, right? Before she's even a full-fledged party member? I can't see her doing it now, it doesn't fit her character and she's got too much trust with the group.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2024 22:41

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Final Fantasy VII Remake: the water farting chocobo

«‹›2 »