/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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Bogus Adventure: Jan 11, 2017; More like "Bulges Adventure"

La Brea Carpet posted:

[20M] [19F] of 1 year. Girlfriend mentions a weird church she's joined and wants me to join as well. What is going on here?

Jehova's Witnesses or cult?

This sounds a lot like when Luanne joined a cult in King of the Hill. Is the girl's name Jane by any chance?

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:30

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# ? May 16, 2024 07:55

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

fruit on the bottom posted:

In college I made out with a girl while watching the Lion King. In my head I know the movie didn�t really matter and it would have happened no matter what we watched, but I still feel a little weird that it was during the stampede scene.

i'm going to judge you incredibly harshly if you didn't go out the next day to rent a copy of Titus Andronicus and get ready for an incredible date night

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:31

Bored: Jul 26, 2007; Dude, ix-nay on the oice-vay.

But Rocks Hurt Head posted:

What is she doing all day that's so exhausting about selling MLM makeup?

Facebook.
https://ellebeaublog.com/2017/02/01/chapter-1-getting-reeled-in/

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:34

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Pick posted:

Well like I think I had my night movie because I just bought a sable I REALLY did not need and still feel guilty about, materialism is a poison

Sables are rad though :confused:

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:38

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i'm going to judge you incredibly harshly if you didn't go out the next day to rent a copy of Titus Andronicus and get ready for an incredible date night

Unfortunately things didn�t work out between us. Mostly because I didn�t do this, I think.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:38

TheKennedys: Sep 23, 2006; By my hand, I will take you from this godforsaken internet

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Do we count Phineas and Ferb among Disney songs, because in that case I could probably spam you with youtube links until I'm needfully banned

hey, Phineas and Ferb had Bowling for Soup do the theme at least and they're cool and good

the rest of the show was songs that were really catchy and funny the first ten or twelve times and then you started wanting to take a power drill to your ears

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:41

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

Pick posted:

Also taxidermy isn�t a �collection� it�s a person museum and an ark of death.

Freudian slippin over here.

E: huh. Awful app was telling me I was on the last page of the thread. Ignore my poo poo from ten pages back

Pvt.Scott fucked around with this message at 16:55 on Apr 20, 2018

# ? Apr 20, 2018 16:45

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

StrangersInTheNight posted:

i mean, driving's not for everyone and honestly more people should prob tap outta doing it, there's a lot of insanely bad drivers on the road so i kinda respect when someone is self-aware enough to know they'd just be a mess at it, like David Sedaris

that said goddamn girl being smart doesn't preclude crazy

also yeah the being scared of even getting a ride on 4/20 thing is pretty heightened paranoia (which is why i imagine she'd be a panicky driver at best)

To be fair she did say she struggles with agoraphobia (so we're already past "rational" and she knows it probably) and it isn't helpful to yell YOU'RE CRAZY at people with mental illness.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:27

TROIKA CURES GREEK: Jun 30, 2015; by R. Guyovich

it's fun tho

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:29

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 1 year, we have an issue with video games.

quote:

Basically, we play together for a few online games, with the contentious one being Rainbow Six: Siege. Our other activities mainly revolve around watching tv shows together, and studying/gaming/reading whilst we're hanging out. I�m pretty relaxed about things, and it�s hard for me to get angry.

My girlfriend, though it's improved over our time together, will get angry when she loses in online games. This leads to her playing more until she wins. She'll be irritable and curt when I try to talk about something, but will exit the room with her laptop if I don't talk because she doesn't think there's any point to being in the same room if we aren't talking.

Once, we ended up playing together several hours past midnight because she would shout at me each match to keep going and ask me if I was trying to make her lose. I don't hold it against her, because I know she's very competitive in her passions and I wasn�t, but it�s still a bit of a traumatic memory.

Today was another incident of me not listening to something, her getting angry and complaining about how I never trust her and don�t take it seriously enough, then the both of us do our own thing before we go to bed.

I used to not argue back and try to calm her down, but she told me during one of our fights that she found it annoying and that I should get angry back if I don�t like something about her. Me getting angry does make me feel less like I�m a verbal punching bag, but I don�t think it�s very productive except getting her to back off for the night.

I feel a little lost. Each morning we wake up and my girlfriend is back to her normal, happy self and it's like nothing ever happened. I�ve mentioned her anger in passing a few times, but she says it�s because she�s very competitive and that she never stays angry after sleeping. I mean, I suppose it�s a measure of how close we are that she can get so angry at me to my face, since she�s polite to everyone else?

I don�t know if I should confront her more directly about her anger when she�s in a good mood, just get good and keep going, or if perhaps I should just stop playing games that can set her off easily?

Tl;dr Girlfriend gets angry at me for not listening to her in multiplayer games, hates losing, is always completely pleasant the next day. Don�t know if I should confront her about the anger, stop playing online games with her, or just go along with it.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:37

But Rocks Hurt Head: Jun 30, 2003; by Hand Knit; Pillbug

How is that not transitioning into amazing angry sex where they compete to come first? Smdh

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:42

SpazmasterX: Jul 13, 2006; Wrong about everything XIV related
~fartz~

fruit on the bottom posted:

Me [20 M] with my girlfriend [22 F] of 1 year, we have an issue with video games.

Would you rather she vent at video games or vent on your stupid face

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:44

Skutter: Apr 8, 2007; Well you can fuck that sky high!

hanales posted:

It warms my heart to quote UCB 20 years after the fact. I knew I liked you al borgland Corp.

I appreciate you both for this.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:44

hanales: Nov 3, 2013

Pope Corky the IX posted:

Just because he shined Walt�s rear end for change?

Oh he�s no rear end shiner, he played a stowaway in Star Wars and had the titular line in out of Africa.

Skutter posted:

I appreciate you both for this.

It�s a wonderful Friday!

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:46

ScentOfAnOtaku: Aug 25, 2006; I have no control, I just keep eating, and eating.

Hey Reddit, my girlfriend gets really annoying and verbally abusive when we play this one game, how can we ever fix this? I guess we could just stop playing it, but that would require growing a spine.

I can't understand why people get so competitive and lovely when it comes to online games. I have one friend I enjoy playing games with online, and its because they don't turn into a screaming idiot when a game doesn't go their way and just enjoy the time playing together.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:53

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

ScentOfAnOtaku posted:

Hey Reddit, my girlfriend gets really annoying and verbally abusive when we play this one game, how can we ever fix this? I guess we could just stop playing it, but that would require growing a spine.

I can't understand why people get so competitive and lovely when it comes to online games. I have one friend I enjoy playing games with online, and its because they don't turn into a screaming idiot when a game doesn't go their way and just enjoy the time playing together.

some people want to get on that sweet rear end "socially sanctioned excuse to act like a psycho" football freakout train but are too nerdy to fake an interest in sportsball

# ? Apr 20, 2018 17:59

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

One time I beat my GF at Super Smash and she got up and started trying to choke me.

I wasn't like in fear of injury but still.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:02

Pope Corky the IX: Dec 18, 2006; What are you looking at?

hanales posted:

Oh he�s no rear end shiner, he played a stowaway in Star Wars and had the titular line in out of Africa.

You�re a very good driver.

Meryl.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:14

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Moridin920 posted:

One time I beat my GF at Super Smash and she got up and started trying to choke me.

I wasn't like in fear of injury but still.

Was it with Rosalina? Because if it was she wasn�t choking hard enough :mad:

For all other characters, that�s terrible and I hope you got yourself out of that clearly toxic relationship

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:27

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

My (24F) sister in law (31F) stole my job

quote:

Ok basically I started working for my brother �Evan� in January right after I had a baby. I was supposed to go to his house three times a week and file papers and other things like that with his wife for their business. First she starts asking me to answer the phone while I�m there but they know I have horrible anxiety so I couldn�t do it but they said that was fine and kept giving me paperwork to do. But it was hard going to their house with the baby so I couldn�t always do the three days. They stopped calling me to come in around March so I figured they were slow and didn�t need me and they would let me know when to come back.

Today I text Evan because I�m a little low on money and now that I�m not as overwhelmed with the baby I can work more and he tells me I was a NO SHOW several times at work before and he gave my job to my brother �John�s wife �Becca� ALMOST A MONTH AGO.

Come to find out Becca gets to work from HER house and she�s I guess their full time secretary now? They gave her a work phone and business cards and everything.

How is it ok to fire me with no reason? Evan said he wasn�t mad and he just thought it was too much for me with the baby but Becca has FOUR kids and had the last one in February so it can�t be that. I�m mad that he lied to me. I�m mad at Becca for just swooping in and taking my job when she knew I was working there. I�m mad at John for not even telling me. My mom is mad too and thinks what he did might even be illegal since he didn�t give me any warnings or anything. She called Evan and told him to give me my job back but he just said that Becca is doing so great that he won�t do it.

I get that she�s in our family but I�m HIS SISTER. I don�t know what to do. I think my mom is going to call John tomorrow so he can tell his wife this isn�t ok with her but I really think she owes me an apology and an explanation too. I would just get a job somewhere else but everywhere around here only pays minimum wage and they want you to work a lot more hours than I can because I have health issues. Evan knows all this but he�s still being so rude. Please help.

tldr - - my brother just stopped letting me work and my sister in law took my job so I�m really upset

Gee, I wonder why you don�t have the job anymore

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:29

Milotic: Mar 4, 2009; 9CL apologist; Slippery Tilde

Bf [28M] and his family expect me [24F] to buy his sister [26F] expensive bday presents off of her wish-list. Is this weird or am I being stingy?

quote:

u/PrestigiousDaikon1
So apparently this is their family tradition so I suppose I should just respect it? It just makes me uncomfortable to be honest and I don't really know how to approach this.

Ok so his younger sister is turning 27 next month and we're all invited to her bday party which is great. Bf came to me last week and told me that his mom fwd him the bday wish list his sister made and that I can pick anything off of the list to buy her. Well I took a look at the list and kinda fainted a little. It is ALL so expensive. Like high-end designer shoes/bags/clothing. The cheapest item on the list was I think $350. My bf is buying her a pair of $650 shoes for reference.

I asked bf if this is normal and if everyone buys her this sort of thing and he said no just him and his older brothers and some of their gfs/wives. He said it's really only expected from people who make more money and since we both work in finance, it's expected by his family that we splurge on notably nicer presents for the lower-earning family members. I get the logic, I really do, but it just doesn't sit right with me. I'm fine with spending hundreds on presents for close friends or loved-ones on special occasions, but being expected to buy something nice for someone I've never really spent any time with is just bizarre.

Idk. Am I being cheap and should I just go with the flow? In the grand scheme of things it's not like I can't afford $350, but it does feel weird. I'm also worried that if I deny this is just going to cause a bigger issue with his family. What's the right choice here?

tldr: Bf's family expects me to buy his younger sister a really expensive bday gift because bf and I earn more and it's "customary." I feel weird but don't know if I should make a stink about it or just let it go and buy the thing. What should I do?

From the comments:

quote:

His mom expects separate gifts though. I know this because I went to a family dinner of theirs to celebrate his uncle's 60th, and the mom got pissy because his older brother and his wife brought a joint gift instead of separates.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:30

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

fruit on the bottom posted:

My (24F) sister in law (31F) stole my job
Gee, I wonder why you don�t have the job anymore

TIL it's illegal to fire people without giving them two weeks notice.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:31

Ham Sandwiches: Jul 7, 2000

fruit on the bottom posted:

My (24F) sister in law (31F) stole my job

Gee, I wonder why you don�t have the job anymore

The narrative structure of that post is pretty amazing. That person is in no way doing anything to cause these outcomes, just these bummers happen to them, and it really sucks.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:33

christmas boots: Oct 15, 2012; To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out; Biscuit Hider

Ham Sandwiches posted:

The narrative structure of that post is pretty amazing. That person is in no way doing anything to cause these outcomes, just these bummers happen to them, and it really sucks.

It�s not easy to live your life in the passive voice.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:33

Milotic: Mar 4, 2009; 9CL apologist; Slippery Tilde

Run, run and never stop running:

My (22F) future "mother-in-law"(50sF) is asking way too much from me

quote:

u/Spiritual_Broccoli
I have been dating my boyfriend for about 5 years now, so I guess you can say we are in a long term serious relationship that could possibly lead to marriage.

For the past year, my boyfriend's mother has been suggesting different things I should do to secure my future with her son. The first thing she did was suggest that I start a life insurance policy and add my boyfriend as a beneficiary. The agent came to their house and we had a 3 hour long discussion about the different policies and she was pushing me to go for the policy which would cost about $300/month. Although I have a decent paying job, I am in no position to pay that much every month for life insurance when I am only 22 years old. I filled out the application and provided my bank routing and account number for the initial deposit, but I decided not to go through with it right now.

After the whole life insurance policy discussion went away, she started suggesting my boyfriend and I get a safe deposit box together and put our income in there as savings. No way in hell would I do that, so I declined, but my boyfriend went ahead and opened the safe deposit box on his own and added his mother to it.

Now just recently, she has been pressuring us to buy plots in the cemetery as "security," saying that we can sell it in the future if we desperately need the money. She also said that open plots are hard to come by in this specific cemetery so we have to buy it now before it is all filled. Unbeknownst to me, they decided to go ahead and purchase the plots without my knowledge, each costing about $14,500 and we are contracted to 3 plots (one for me, one for my boyfriend, one for his mom). There is also an initial down payment of $5,000 and I would have to pay about $250/month for 60 months to pay off the plot for myself. This whole situation makes me INCREDIBLY upset because they went ahead and did this without my knowledge and I have to be stuck with a stupid piece of land I won't even utilize until I'm dead for who knows how long. The crazy thing is that I'm not even on the deed so if we break up, there's no guarantee I will get my money back. Although $250 a month won't be a huge hit for me, it still makes absolutely NO sense as to why I would need to throw away close to $15,000 when I could use that money towards my new car or down payment for a mortgage.

I expressed my displeasure with the whole situation to my boyfriend but he basically just brushed it off saying it'll be good for our future. Regardless of what happens, I still have to pay it monthly, but how can I prevent things like this from happening in the future when we get married? He comes from a really superstitious Chinese family and is a momma's boy, so he believes EVERYTHING his mom tells him, even if it makes absolutely no sense. Would it also be weird for me to have legal documents involved in regards to the cemetery plots and my payments? I am really close to his family and I am certain they won't do anything shady if push comes to shove, but I do need to my own security.

TL;DR: Boyfriend's mom is trying to make unnecessary financial decisions that has little to no benefits, but claiming it will secure our future. Now I am stuck paying $14,500 for a cemetery plot for the next 5 years and my name isn't even on the deed. How do I prevent similar things from happening in the future? Should I get legal papers involved for the plot?

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:37

Cough Drop The Beat: Jan 22, 2012; by Lowtax

dudeness posted:

Girlfriend (f26) is into DDLG. I'm (m34) new to this, played along to please her. It has crept outside of the bedroom and is causing me to resent her.

Why in the heck would this dude ever get into DDLG if he's not actually into it? Whyyyyyyyyyyy? :psypop:

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:37

Moridin920: Nov 15, 2007; by FactsAreUseless

Milotic posted:

Bf [28M] and his family expect me [24F] to buy his sister [26F] expensive bday presents off of her wish-list. Is this weird or am I being stingy?

From the comments:

gently caress people in finance lol

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:38

Yawgmoth: Sep 10, 2003; This post is cursed!

fruit on the bottom posted:

My (24F) sister in law (31F) stole my job

Gee, I wonder why you don�t have the job anymore

I really want the update to this one because holy fuckin :laffo:

"he fired me for no reason (except for that part where I couldn't be bothered to show up)! this has to be illegal!"

Bonus points if/when she reveals she works in an at-will employment state.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:42

Doggles: Apr 22, 2007

Why am I (26M) so stubborn when my fianc�e (26F) asks me why I don't want to change my last name after marriage?

quote:

We have been engaged for over a year and still have not settled on a last name conclusion.

It bothers her that I won't consider changing my last name at all. I enjoy history, coats-of-arms, and ancestry tracking far too much to ever consider changing my last name, and I am too nuclear-family oriented to want to hyphenate my name. To me, families have the same last name.

She just changed her name two years ago away from her father's last name to her mother's maiden name. She is fully supportive of the two of us picking a new name altogether. She's less supportive of both of us hyphenating our names, even less supportive of only hyphenating her last name, and even less supportive of changing her last name to mine altogether. She's also torn about just moving her last name into her middle name.

Suffice it to say, we are on opposite sides of the last name spectrum here. I completely understand her reluctance to changing her name as I am even more reluctant to change my own. Yet in this modern gender-equal world, I don't know how to explain why it's important to me to keep my name. I can find dozens of articles defending women for wanting to keep their names, but I don't see any defense for my traditional desire of taking the man's name beyond "it's what people do". Can anyone put into words my mental struggle?

TL;DR I don't want to change my last name after marriage but do not know a modern way of defending that stance.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:44

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Milotic posted:

Run, run and never stop running:

My (22F) future "mother-in-law"(50sF) is asking way too much from me

You ARE going to be killed. Get away.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:45

Ham Sandwiches: Jul 7, 2000

Doggles posted:

Why am I (26M) so stubborn when my fianc�e (26F) asks me why I don't want to change my last name after marriage?

When these kinds of disputes come up, I feel that keeping both people's names before / after marriage is a cool way to do it, the way certain high profile celebrities do.

I know it's social customs and such but the change in names and pronouns away from discrete individuals (This is Janet, an independent person) to possessive titles (This is MY wife / husband) just seems part of the ways that marriage is hosed up in our society.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:48

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Doggles posted:

Why am I (26M) so stubborn when my fiancée (26F) asks me why I don't want to change my last name after marriage?

Jesus h just neither of you change your names, this isn't hard

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:48

LethalGeek: Nov 4, 2009

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

Why in the heck would this dude ever get into DDLG if he's not actually into it? Whyyyyyyyyyyy?

Because she's hot.

Next.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:48

Bunni-kat: May 25, 2010; Service Desk B-b-bunny...
How can-ca-caaaaan I
help-p-p-p you?

Doggles posted:

Why am I (26M) so stubborn when my fianc�e (26F) asks me why I don't want to change my last name after marriage?

His definition of family has presented a nice no-win situation. If she changes her name, in his view, he's removed her from her family completely. If they both keep their names, they aren't a family.

Guy has hosed up values.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:49

But Rocks Hurt Head: Jun 30, 2003; by Hand Knit; Pillbug

I like that the fiancee has already changed her last name once to a totally different one, and wants to just do it again for fun.

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:49

zakharov: Nov 30, 2002; Tater Love

Milotic posted:

Run, run and never stop running:

My (22F) future "mother-in-law"(50sF) is asking way too much from me

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:49

Clark Nova: Jul 18, 2004

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

Why in the heck would this dude ever get into DDLG if he's not actually into it? Whyyyyyyyyyyy?

I imagine he thought it would just be her calling him �daddy� in bed, not a full time pedophilia role play scenario that encompasses his entire waking life

# ? Apr 20, 2018 18:51