Inferno985 posted:

bottles filled with a urine and semen mix

canyoneer posted:

Couldn't decide if he was coming or going

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Rex-Goliath posted:

imagine being so broken brained that you think this is a compelling argument to normal people

KomodoWagon posted:

There have been posts by people identifying as "gaycels." While they may or may not buy into the Chad Mythos, they are all about pitying themselves for their lack of a sex life and blaming utterly nonsensical factors.

Coolguye posted:

'gaycel' is the funniest loving thing. i remember a few years back i was having lunch with a programmer buddy of mine i hadn't seen in a long time. gay as hell and also programmer as hell. paunchy, lovely hair, patchy beard that he refused to shave, horrifyingly abrasive personality - but he and i had done some good work in the past so he gave me a break on his usually lovely attitude. about three quarters of the way through the meal, he looked at his phone and excused himself. he came back ten minutes later and i commented that took a while, and he entirely seriously said "yah sorry went to get my dick sucked"

i wtf'd and he showed me grindr, told me how it worked, and pointed out the profile of the guy who he had just met in the bathroom to get a blowjob from, and told me how he was certain that it was going to work out like that because of the UI and poo poo.

this dude literally got up in the middle of a noontime meal and got his dick sucked in the loving bathroom from a total stranger, looking like someone from revenge of the nerds. it blew my loving mind.

Oscar Wild posted:

Was it awkward when you both left the table at the same time? Who held the restroom door open for whom?

MizPiz posted:

https://twitter.com/pullovergirl/status/988960224982781953?s=19

Plavski posted:

that camel looks so cool someone could make an entire advertising campaign out of it

hell, slap it on packets of cigarettes and i'm sure you'd even get kids buying them they're so cool

pog boyfriend posted:

can mods delete posts in QCS, like, say some one accidentally incriminated themselves and they are not sure if some, lets say, auditor found out about a somethingawful account, and they want the posts deleted. Can that be done

cda posted:

Can't the person in question just edit the post?

pog boyfriend posted:

Thundercracker posted:

Pretty much. That's why that episode where he and Sisko were stuck on a planet ruled so much. It was the virgin Dukat trying to convince chad siskso that he wasn't at fault for being a Occupationcel. And Sisko had to put up and listen because his legs were broken.

Sisko literally got every Dukat wanted, from being beloved by Bajorians to being a war hero to having a loving alive child.

loquacius posted:

I don't think anyone has ever had the problem of "too communist to get laid in college", no

PMush Perfect posted:

your moms a stupid buzzword

Grand Prize Winner posted:

just because my mom is named Paradigm doesn't mean you should hurt her feelings

Ariong posted:

This quote is good in context, but it also makes a great general addition to the lexicon. Especially around here.

Rando posted:

I don't dislike the guy or anything but I honestly do not understand how this little following exists.

Other Barry posted:

pontius pilate said the same thing

Android Apocalypse posted:

WalletBeef posted:

jokes on him, the princess is in another casket

Crocoswine posted:

frankenfreak posted:

frankenfreak posted:

Field Mousepad posted:

As much as I want to laugh that's a little kid in that casket.

Field Mousepad posted:

As much as I want to laugh that's a little kid in that casket.

Super Soaker Party! posted:

The worst part was he only needed 4 more coins to reach 100.

Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:

time flows like a river... and goon one-liners repeat...

Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:

china bot posted:

CaptainViolence posted:

that poison mushroom is making heaven too loving crowded

CzarChasm posted:

I do like how the casket says "Super Shame" on it.

Dirt Road Junglist posted:

My dad taught me to drive stick in his manual-everything pickup when I was 9. He told me, "listen, my family has a history of heart problems. If one of us is in trouble, and no one else can drive, I want to make sure you can drive us to the hospital."

Thanks, Dad. I love having a crisis of mortality while also wrestling a big, red vehicle that handles like a horse on meth. Awesome.

Big Grunty Secret posted:

I wish we could have this Wee Bey face as a smilie

Rad-daddio posted:

Well, yes but it's just my usual single penis. The doctors had to graft it to my wrist to keep it alive while they rebuild my pelvis and taint. I was involved in a complicated and painful accident that involved:

1. an anvil
2. 65 feet of galvanized chain
3. a snowmobile
4. a bowling ball
5. a low dollar knock off katana blade
6. a leaf spring from a 1991 Chevy S-10

The docs say I should make a full recovery, but I'll have to carry a card to show where the metal plates are if I ever try to fly again. Although, once DHS got involved after the accident, I'm pretty sure I ended up on the no fly list.

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO posted:

You picked a fight with John McAffee.

Rad-daddio posted:

to be fair, he was sleeping with four girls at once. I should've known better than to disturb him.

Gavrilo Princip posted:

I hope the queen intervenes and declares that the dead kids organs are transplanted into the new royal baby as "backups", and that this happens every time a kid is terminally sick until the new royal baby is a veritable katamari of cast-off baby meat, an incredibly strong heaving mass of tragedy giblets

punk rebel ecks posted:

Reddit killed Something Awful right?

Laterite posted:

by cutting the dead weight of toxic zero-content posters, SA has gotten lean and sinewy, like one of those dudes in their 50s at the gym that you don't want to mess with.

little munchkin posted:

*does the mario 64 backwards long jump glitch to zoom into the thread at an unbelievably high speed* hey this guy measuring jew skulls for their cranial capacity actually makes a lot of good points. it turns out high-iq is actually correlated with these broad generalizations he's made about an entire ethnicity. i know he didn't provide any data to support those generalizations but the guy's a therapist so he probably knows a lot about how the different races behave.

Inkfish posted:

Things at Roma street station- a man with a broken tennis racket around his neck. A fat guy with cursive neck tatts who keeps lifting his shirt up and rubbing his tummy. A bin in a locked cage. Old man in short shorts going around checking the change slots on all the vending machines

Inkfish posted:

This is all just poo poo directly in front of me god knows what's going on outside of my field of vision

Doctor Bishop posted:

Memento posted:

Who What Now posted:

That appears to be third

Mr-Spain posted:

So he's just looking out into the outfield?

Solice Kirsk posted:

Who?

china bot posted:

Fourth base!

marshmallow creep posted:

We get it; you eat rear end.

Bombadilillo posted:

That's the dugout

LimburgLimbo posted:

You’re right; I am a foreigner that knows about ingrained cultural racism in Japan. Arguably I know more about it than most Japanese becuse I’ve experienced to some extent all sides of the equation, being treated as Japanese in some areas and deeply understanding the culture, while in other contexts been victim of it.

Krankenstyle posted:

god, pay attention.

PurdWerfect posted:

terse prayer, that

Hjalmar posted:

Very happy to hear your 2018 has been "two dogs loving" so far, though! Sorry about your garbage fire marriage.

Karate Bastard posted:

On a completely unrelated tangent, was it here that someone posted a completely fantastic article on the African and American adventures of scout founder Robert Baden Powell and his mortal enemy the psycho killer fraud working together to introduce hippopotami to the deltas of Florida? It was amazing. Could someone please repost it?

Karate Bastard posted:

Yes! Thanks, it's great.

quote:

Submitted without comment:
Miscarried last night. Husband is awful.
I had a miscarriage last night. Was in the ER until midnight then to my doctors appointment at 11 today.

Finally get home this evening and just want to cry and sulk and my husband is acting like I just didn’t experience something completely awful.

I can’t sleep so I’m sitting on the couch. My husband comes up and honks my boob. Seriously. Then he yells at me because I’m not ready for bed but he’s tired.

I can’t stop crying and I haven’t felt this alone in my life. Reddit is all I have to vent too.

La Brea Carpet posted:

*husband grabs boob*

*World's most mournful tugboat horn plays*

Midnight Voyager posted:

I feel like this boob honk is the more realistic version of a CAD miscarriage comic. It at least stays on tone with the rest of CAD!

Clark Nova posted:

like a cigarette should posted:

I've got a system, honed to a razor's edge. I may be a 6 or 7 on my best day, but I find the men who are below my perceived worth, delving so far into the territories of 4s and 3s. The ones who are so thrilled to get any sort of answer on Tinder, they don't even question my sincerity nor my enthusiasm. And they won't, not even when I've lured them into the very center of my web, deep, deep in the heart of the Applebee's happy hour. I smile at them over my bahama mama limited time special, I laugh as I consume my barbecue brisket tacos, and I even brush their hand as we both reach for our plate of chips and classic spinach artichoke dip at the same time. The smart ones recognize me by the fourth classic sampler, but rarely. Only later, when I bring up the blue ribbon triple chocolate meltdown, do I see the fear in their eyes.

...And by the time the bill arrives, it's far, far too late for them...