lord funk posted:

To this day I will still burst out laughing in the middle of a funeral if I accidentally think of Zybourne Clock.

BOOTY-ADE posted:

I'm the kind of guy who laughs at a funeral
Can't understand what I mean?
Well, some goons will
I have a tendency to wear five aces up my sleeve
I think that time works like four balls on a cliff

Agean90 posted:

Mario: oppresses the goomba proletariat, constantly sucking up to mobility, takes coins from koopas then hordes them

Luigi: working class ghostbuster, has a dog, steals from the rich who try to keep their wealth after they die

Parrotine posted:

Fuuuuuuuuck I want this to happen now god dammit

On another note I've developed a new strategy for winning at online Smash, it's called getting drunk on White Russians while listening to Barbie Girl from Aqua, I've won ten straight matches in a row

A FESTIVE SKELETON posted:

just set up the new posting rig boys

Jerry Cotton posted:

I'm the one that's turned off.

ambient oatmeal posted:

Nuke the whales

infernal machines posted:

frankly they've got it coming

FMguru posted:

gotta nuke something

uncurable mlady posted:

what have whales done for me lately?

Bulgakov posted:

well for one she brought you into this world

Krankenstyle posted:

Kuros posted:

For fucks sake, the dude couldn't be bothered to plastic protect the keyboard or mouse. Imagine the kbm expenses on a yearly basis.

Ali G posted:

I know a lot of you goons out there look up to me, as sort of a big brother.I am awsome at almost everything, im good looking and most of everyone likes me. I have very few flaws, I have great options on everything.

So what im trying to say is ask a cool person what its like being cool.

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

taqueso posted:

*Bernie points at jumbled mess of radium code*

"gently caress, sorry guys I'm going to have to skip this promise and do something easier like reform medical care."

Dumb Lowtax posted:

Rectal Death Adept posted:

Rent: $800
Utility: $150
Goldbelly: $7,000 subscription for airlifted chili
Forums $0

someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my forums are dying.

EorayMel posted:

EorayMel posted:

Garrand posted:

Flickr sounds like a lesbian dating app.

Kitfox88 posted:

lmao it’s a perma

JacquelineDempsey posted:

sebmojo posted:

It's from 2005

The War Queer posted:

WHY ISN'T IT

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

Jon Joe posted:

What's his stand name

Hihohe posted:

『NO MORE MR NICE GUY』

Captain_Indigo posted:

Though outside of Japan it's been subbed to 'Friendzone'.

Platystemon posted:

https://twitter.com/sarahmei/status/1078932447314595840

Platystemon posted:

https://twitter.com/sarahmei/status/1079021881498320896

She explicitly rejects prosthetic limbs.

What is the “negative space” there? Victims of piracy who would have been spared had the peg leg not existed?

A Man With A Plan posted:

Oscar Pistorius' girlfriend?

The War Queer posted:

WHY ISN'T IT

Uptime Sinclair posted:

https://twitter.com/jackallisonlol/status/1208515340956651520?s=21

FAT32 SHAMER posted:

doctor robuttnik can’t get laid shocker

NoneMoreNegative posted:

he look like he been laid all right

Sapozhnik posted:

Meinberg posted:

I'm trying to find the words to explain my experience of watching the film. It's impossible to actually describe the film, you see, for it has transcended language and understanding. Towards the end of the film, Judi Dench, who plays the queen of the cats, turns directly to the camera and sings about how we all understand cats now and don't need an interpreter anymore. But there is never any interpretation, there is only the grinding of cosmic shards against one another, there is only the sudden and bone-deep realization that we are all artificial, that reality itself simply does NOT cohere, and that we are all living paradoxes, trapped in between the emotional poles of joie de vivre, the depression of alienation, and pure, raw menace. At one point, the devil (who is a cat) drugs all of the good cats into an orgy that he might kidnap the queen of the cats. Logic and reason tear at the seems, space itself compresses into this abstract notion of distance, all touch becomes sensual, the cats frolic in the ruined remnants of a dead humanity. Characters enter the narrative, sing who they are, and then disappear. The camera doesn't care for the relationships between things, all it cares about is bodies in constant, frantic motion, always touching, always prowling, always consuming, until nothing remains but the motion itself as harbinger of days that shall never be.

anyway i give it a 7/10 would watch again

WarpedNaba posted:

I actually thought everyone in D&D was ironyposting in my first year on SA.

Then I remembered Occam's razor was a thing.

The White Dragon posted:

it was, once upon a time, an interesting sub, back when they actually still had posters who had educational specializations and knew anything about anything. but you know how it is with intellectuals fleeing authoritarian regimes

scary ghost dog posted:

there used to be a subforum where u wrre allowed to call the mods idiot fuckers, loser, pieces of poo poo and dumbass......but now that kind of behavior is considered toxic [britney spears toxic starts playing] oh, thats my phone. hello? yes? how did u get this number? [hangs up] that was the mods. im banned again

Casimir Radon posted:

Just cause you come from a shitload of incest doesn't mean you're royalty.

Sapozhnik posted:

Azathoth posted:

I remember way back in the early days, some porn site tried accepting bitcoin and found that it hurt their conversion rate to simply offer it along side the normal methods of payment.

...! posted:

that was wikipedia

red19fire posted:

Once she freed the house elf slaves they went back to working for their masters for free, because that is their nature. So why try to make a better world for anyone?

I forget who wrote it but there was a great breakdown of Harry Potter on these dead gay forums as the ultimate neolib fantasy. The wizard world leaders ignore a dangerous existential threat until it’s far too late to handle, trying to keep it under the rug even as Voldemort is openly murdering people in public. Harry defeats Voldemort not by being better at magic, or more clever; Voldemort accidentally defeats himself via a technicality in the rules of magic that everyone forgot about. Harry then fulfills his destiny by becoming an FBI agent wizard.

purple death ray posted:

That's not so weird, a lot of grand wizards go into law enforcement

A Gnarlacious Bro posted:

Trotsky was the worlds first something awful poster, bad dick game little annoying egghead goblin whos vendetta against the mods led to repeated exile and then permaban.

gschmidl posted:

I finally realized I could feed Goodkind into TalkToTransformer, the text-prediction AI. The result is indistinguishable (seed text bold).

quote:

Hissing, hackles lifting, the chicken's head rose.

Kahlan pulled back.

Its claws digging into stiff dead flesh, the chicken slowly turned to face her. It cocked its head, making its comb flop, its wattles sway.

Kahlan looked past the chicken and onto her father's arm.

A moment later, the chicken's face shifted from its normal expression to one of the most unearthly grins she had ever seen. Then, it opened its jaws, revealing rows of sharp razor-sharp teeth.

The bird flapped its wings, lifting Kahlan up off the ground.

Kahlan barely had time to brace herself before the bird closed in, slashing its beak through her dress.

Kahlan let go, but the knife had already ripped a hole in her dress. The bird landed, ripping another hole in the dress. Kahlan stumbled, then collapsed, barely able to

Khizan posted:

I fed that same seed text into TalkToTransformer, and then I fed the results back into it, and then I fed those back into it, and so forth.

quote:

Hissing, hackles lifting, the chicken's head rose.

Kahlan pulled back.

Its claws digging into stiff dead flesh, the chicken slowly turned to face her. It cocked its head, making its comb flop, its wattles sway.
---
"Come and get me, mister." she snapped.

She felt its cold breath on her face. A sharp, cold breath.

She felt a rush of cold breath against her lips.

The chicken's voice made her heart beat faster.

She felt her hands move. She opened her mouth. She took a deep breath.

A chill ran down her back.
---
She closed her eyes, feeling the coolness.

"Oh, God!"

She said it out loud.

She felt the chill on her back. She wrapped her arms around it. She hugged the chicken tight.

She felt the chill in her face. She shut her eyes.
---
She was shivering.

Her heart was hammering, her mind racing. She thought, how many times do I need to say that chicken? How many times do I need to remind myself that chickens are wonderful?

She felt a warm, soft, delicious, comforting feeling. She held chicken against her body, enjoying the warm, feathery feeling on her skin.
---
Suddenly, she felt the chicken's warm, soft beak and wondered what would happen if she took a step backward or pulled her hands away from the chicken.

She felt the chicken's beak nip at her and it seemed to be saying, no! Do you have any idea of how I want to be treated?
---
The chicken's voice.

The chicken's mouth.

The chicken's hands.

The chicken's legs.

She felt it.

She felt the heat.

She felt the power.

And, finally, she felt it.

The warmth inside her body.

It was a power she had never felt before,

but it was all she could take.

And the chicken cried out.

Uh, that sure went somewhere alright.

I'd still believe that Goodkind wrote it, though.

LITERALLY A BIRD posted:

Laughing at my phone on Christmas Eve because I remembered these posts in the Sword of Truth thread

quote:

A sudden blow: the great wings beating still
Above the staggering girl, her thighs caressed
By the dark webs, her nape caught in his bill,
He holds her helpless breast upon his breast.

How can those terrified vague fingers push
The feathered glory from her loosening thighs?
And how can body, laid in that white rush,
But feel the strange heart beating where it lies?

A shudder in the loins engenders there
The broken wall, the burning roof and tower
And Agamemnon dead.
                    Being so caught up,
So mastered by the brute blood of the air,
Did she put on his knowledge with his power
Before the indifferent beak could let her drop?