RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Got this in an email a little while ago:

"Lynn walked into the wall behind Claudia's desk. At approximately 1:40 today. Please let me know if you have this on video... Please please please"

# ¿ Aug 13, 2013 23:56

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# ¿ Apr 30, 2024 13:02

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Caged posted:

I made a little Powershell script that pops the computer name up in a dialog box on the middle of the screen, and deployed a shortcut to it on everyone's desktops.

People still struggle to find the icon, but it's easier than the alternatives.

Please share this script. If I have to try and walk a person through bringing up a command prompt and typing "hostname" one more time I'm gonna snap.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2013 22:52

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Was away from my office for no more than 15 minutes and came back to find a small box outdide my office door labeled "computer stuff". Opened it up to find a couple floppy disks, some MS Works software from like 1999 and a gross, sticky USB cable. Gee, thanks for leaving your trash with me.

# ¿ Aug 30, 2013 00:36

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

WDS is what you're looking for. Install it on one of your servers, get a machine set up exactly the way you want, then sysprep it and capture the image. Once that's done, just boot the workstations from the network, and then image them. Sounds like you've got the moving user data bit figured out already.
You're probably not going to find anything easier than WDS (at least without spending large amounts of money), it takes a bit of upfront work, but once it's running you'll be imaging machines like nobody's business.

# ¿ Apr 30, 2014 20:34

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

A ticket didnt come in...

User: "Hey Mr. Clark, we have a new guy starting today, can you get his accounts set up, it's real important"

Me: "Sure, just go ahead and email me his name, title, and supervisor name and I'll take care of the rest"

User: "Will do! That was really easy!"

Still hadnt received any email regarding this by the time I left my office 5 hours later.

# ¿ May 29, 2014 01:25

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Maintenance dude: "How should we handle a keyboard with a used condom on it?"
Me: "As a biohazard"

Maintenance dude removed the old keyboard and I replaced it with the crustiest used keyboard that I could find in my discard pile.

# ¿ May 30, 2014 18:09

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

m.hache posted:

Or just right click on Inbox and Mark as read.

I keep my inbox as clean as possible. Currently only 12 items in there. The rest are sorted into folders.

Same here. It is my goal to have a completely empty inbox by COB Friday. I have no clue why people feel the need to store years worth of email in their inbox, it makes no sense to me. Just file that poo poo away in a folder if you want to save it.

# ¿ Jun 27, 2014 19:28

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

TWBalls posted:

I have (at least, I assume that's what happened). I had a ticket last week where someone had complained that they were unable to log into their system. When I stopped by to look at it, the system was saying that the trust relationship between the system and the domain had broken. Looked at ADUC and the system was still listed and, to my knowledge, no one had joined a second computer with that same name to the domain. Even after removing and re-joining the domain didn't fix it. It wasn't until I had rolled it back to when it last installed updates (earlier that day, I think) that it would finally begin authenticating against the domain again. I'd never seen that happen before.

code:

Test-ComputerSecureChannel -credential domain\administrator -Repair -Verbose

usually does the trick. Run that in powershell, log off, then back in and it should be good to go.

Mr. Clark2 fucked around with this message at 23:28 on Jun 27, 2014

# ¿ Jun 27, 2014 22:37

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

TWBalls posted:

Cool, thanks!

I keep telling myself that I really need to learn Powershell, but I keep putting it off. I think since I'm not on call this weekend, I'll get started. I've got a couple of books and found a couple of Youtube channels that look pretty good.

You should definitely do that. I wish I had started learning it years ago. I've only got about 4-5 months PS experienced under my belt now but it really is game changing stuff for Windows admins.

# ¿ Jun 27, 2014 23:53

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Swink posted:

Got thing to do in windows? Do it with PS. The poo poo you do everyday? Start doing it with PS. You'll learn.

Yep, I use it every day now. Something needs to be automated? Figure out how to do it with PS. Something needs to be done...do it with PS. I pretty much even use it instead of cmd.exe anymore.

# ¿ Jun 28, 2014 21:21

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

lampey posted:

A ticket came in. "Computer is defaulting to power save mode - Help!"

Followed up by an email. I heard a click and it started working.

Send a reply, Are you still having problems with your computer?

Yes.

When I call everything is working

???

"Unable to reproduce problem. Closing ticket"

# ¿ Jul 10, 2014 17:49

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

We just opened a ticket with the vendor that provides our phone and voicemail service, their box is in a constant reboot loop and as a result we have no voicemail at our main facility. It runs OS/2 Warp :\ :10bux:

says they replace it with an XP machine.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2014 19:18

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

We just went live with a new EAS policy that any mobile devices used to access agency email need to have a 4 digit PIN and will auto-lock after 10 minutes, users were notified of the impending change 2 weeks ago. Only one user has complained so far, cant wait for the tickets that will ensue...

# ¿ Aug 6, 2014 19:51

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Was just walking a user through logging into her Office365 email for the first time (she's worked here for years, but is finally getting around to setting up her own email account that has existed as long as she's been here) and after about 20 minutes we finally get her logged in and to the point where she has to choose the time zone and she's confused as to which time zone to pick...even though we've been in the Pacific time zone for longer than this woman has been alive
I ask her, "Which time zone are we in?", hoping that she'll arrive at the correct answer on her own
Her: "Uhhhhh...morning?"
I proceeded to give her the correct answer, then watched as she failed to find the Pacific time zone in the drop-down list even though it was right in front of her. I finally took mercy on her and clicked it. I'm not even 100% sure this woman can read :|

# ¿ Aug 7, 2014 17:29

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

teethgrinder posted:

What were you using for a Mac client? I ran the official 2.0 .NET one with mono, but it sucked. Text fields didn't work properly, crashed easily, ugly.

I had the same experience when using it. Took roughly 3-4 minutes to open, then gave the appearance that it was frozen, clicks would take 2 or so minutes to register.

# ¿ Sep 4, 2014 22:03

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

A recent Ricoh "Tech" that came to our facility was wearing mismatched shoes. One black shoe, one green shoe.

# ¿ Sep 23, 2014 18:51

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Gilok posted:

Word has come in that we are now adding a new department of ~100 users to the groups we support.

I am given to understand that they are on a Novell network from circa 2000, are using Thunderbird for email, and everyone has local admin. No other information has been forthcoming, except that we may also bring on one of their current desktop guys, at least temporarily.

Hahahahaahahaha. Oh how I dont envy you. Please be sure to update us regularly

# ¿ Apr 16, 2015 02:10

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Laserface posted:

Dear Previous Sysadmin.

Thanks for setting every single server up with a 60GB C: drive. Your Foresight on this was truly amazing, especially when combined with the PRTG alerts for those servers set to trigger when they reach 10% or less disk space.

Thank you for also not installing Desktop Experience to make cleaning up the bloated WinSXS folder less of a pain in the rear end. Its not like taking 4-5 client facing, 99% uptime servers offline for an arbitrary update is a big deal.

Finally, your genius DVR system that requires more hands-on maintenance than a British car from the 60s is truly a blessing. There is nothing more satisfying than constantly juggling terabytes of data between hard disks to ensure we have 3 months worth of video recorded.

I..I think we work at the same place :stare:

# ¿ Jun 3, 2015 04:22

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Got a ticket saying that we needed to "computerize" our bell system (I'm a sysadmin at a school). I go and take a look at the current bell system and it's just a box of wires and electronics attached to the wall. I opened it up and saw absolutely no interface that would allow a computer to be attached to it, no ethernet, no serial ports, no USB ports, no ports whatsoever and I know it's not on our network at all. Yep, I'll get right on "computerizing" it.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2015 02:38

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Malachite_Dragon posted:

What does 'computerize' something even mean

They probably want to control the bell system with an app or some BS like that. The woman that opened the ticket is a semi-retard...and a principal.

# ¿ Dec 18, 2015 02:43

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

MrMojok posted:

Clark, did you Computerize that bell yet or what?!?!

No way I'm touching that thing. I kicked it up to my boss, he can :dealwithit:

# ¿ Dec 18, 2015 22:12

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Methylethylaldehyde posted:

The school bell in my High School had mechanical relays and honest to god vacuum tubes. The entire tube system was abandoned in place with a huge rat's nest of 70s brown wiring leading to a super oldschool programmable logic board, with wires leading every which way. I think it tied into the fire alarm system via single "ring bell" wire and the fire panel did all the heavy lifting. It worked, and that's about all it did. Also, they can't disable the bells on weekends or holidays, so you'd hear the 8 AM bell every day.

What was so cool about it is it was all behind a big glass panel right inside the main office door, so you'd see it do it's thing every time the bells needed to ring.

This one is a modern system (the building is less than 10 years old) but still uses relays, you can hear them making an audible thunk every few minutes.

I took another look at the bell system control panel yesterday and here is what I was able to surmise:

- There used to be 2 computers in the office where the control panel is located. They're assuming that 1 of these was somehow used to "computerize" the bell system. This is a false assumption, the 2 computers were not connected to it in any way. I know this because I set them up.
- The control panel does in fact have a way to connect a PC to it...a 3.5mm audio jack on the front panel. I only know this because I went online and found the manual for the dumb thing. There's also a terminal block inside it labelled "RS232". Guess I'm going to have to locate a serial port to 3.5mm cable somewhere with this exact pinout :rolleyes:

Here's the manual: https://www.lathem.com/Portals/0/docs/manuals/USG0014S%20LTR-512%20Install%20Users%20Guide.pdf
- In this office I found some hand written instructions on how to use the control panel to change the bell schedule.

So, I'm going to spend half an hour teaching myself how to program this thing using the control panel, then teach the principal that opened the ticket.

# ¿ Dec 19, 2015 18:24

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

anthonypants posted:

I've discovered a flaw in your plan

Yeah, I spotted that too but since at least one of her staff has already been doing this, I'm hoping that she'll realize there isn't going to be any "computerization". I can dream, right?

# ¿ Dec 19, 2015 18:39

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

GreenNight posted:

Yes, it's excellent. I use it constantly. Pro version is nice.

Seconding this.

# ¿ Jan 12, 2016 22:25

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Japanese Dating Sim posted:

Everyone here calls desktops "CPUs".

Or "the brain"

# ¿ Jan 22, 2016 22:23

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

ConfusedUs posted:

I've actually heard this one before, but hell if I can remember how to fix it.

Once again, our Lord and Saviour Powershell has the answer: Test-ComputerSecureChannel -repair is the cmdlet you'll want to run. Either that or use netdom, but I think the Powershell method is easier.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2016 03:49

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# ¿ Apr 30, 2024 13:02

Mr. Clark2: Sep 17, 2003; Rocco sez: Oh man, what a bummer. Woof.

Judge Schnoopy posted:

A personal request from a board member came in. He has a lovely Brother printer that is USB only, and it's plugged in to a dell desktop that shares the printer to his network. This allows him to print from two laptops roaming around.

The problem is that the Dell is old and inconsistent. After power outages he has to go turn the thing back on and then print again. He wants something that will always work, and has asked if I could find a good USB -> Network print server device in the 30-50 dollar range. Everything I've seen online (and worked with in real life) requires constant reboots and can't stay online for more than two days.

Am I insane if I propose buying a Raspberry Pi, automating everything on boot, configuring CUPS, and installing it at the guy's house? I mean to me that's a perfect solution but I'd also know what to do with it if it breaks. This guy isn't going to get ongoing support in the proposal I'll make him sign.

Plus with what I'm going to include for labor he's 100% better off buying a new printer, but he really really likes this thing apparently.

Yes, you're crazy. Despite anything he signs, you're going to get stuck supporting that setup.

# ¿ Jul 28, 2017 23:07

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > RE: A ticket came in: Did they take the printer into the shitters with them?