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May 15, 2024 14:25
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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To be fair, that is exactly how CR would demand it be programmed.
i know - he's king of these idiots
I've said before it should be something like the cockpit in Titanfall 2
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Jul 12, 2018 12:11
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Chris Roberts considers Star Citizen 'released', he's said multiple times "this is the game" and he thinks they'll just keep adding content, like WoW or something.
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Jul 19, 2018 00:40
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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I've seen no evidence to contradict my theory that most of their concepts come from freelance websites and these things are made by some chump from Thailand and CIG/RSI do no work before they put them in their marketing material
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Jul 23, 2018 00:38
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Sorry, I'm going to blame tuo for this, scary how applicable it can be:
A man walks into an office.
Man: Ah. I'd like to have a space game, please.
Receptionist: Certainly sir. Have you been here before?
Man: No, this is my first time.
Receptionist: I see. Well, do you want to have the full experience, or were you thinking of buying a ship package?
Man: Well, what would be the cost?
Receptionist: Well, it can be $60 for the base package, but you could spend years buying all the ships.
Man: Well, I think it's probably best if I start with the one and then see how it goes from there, okay?
Receptionist: Fine. I'll see who's free at the moment.
(Pause)
Receptionist: Mr. Ortwin is free, but he's a little bit lawyery. Ahh yes, Try Mr. MOMA; room 12.
Man: Thank you. (Walks down the hall. Opens door.)
Angry man: WHADDAYOU WANT?
Man: Well, Well, I was told outside that...
Angry man: DON'T GIVE ME THAT, YOU EVIL GOON!
Man: What?
A: SHUT YOUR DEREK SMART-LOVING FACE YOU HATER! YOU TROLLS MAKE ME PUKE! YOU STALKING LYING BRIGADING PERVERT!!!
M: Yes, but I came here for a space game!!
A: OH! Oh! I'm sorry! This is reddit!
M: Oh! Oh I see!
A: Aha! No, you want room 12A, next door.
M: Oh...Sorry...
A: Not at all!
A: (under his breath) loving haters.
(The man goes into room 12A. Another man is sitting behind a desk.)
Man: Is this the right room for a space game?
Other Man: I've released it once.
Man: No you haven't!
Other Man: Yes I have.
M: When?
O: Just now.
M: No you didn't!
O: Yes I did!
M: You didn't!
O: I did!
M: You didn't!
O: I'm telling you, I did!
M: You did not!
O: Oh I'm sorry, is this a base package, or the full PTU experience?
M: Ah! (taking out his wallet and pledging) Just the base package.
O: Just the base package then. Thank you.
O: Anyway, I did release it.
M: You most certainly did not!
O: Now let's get one thing quite clear: I most definitely released it!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh no you didn't!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: No you DIDN'T!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: No you DIDN'T!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: No you DIDN'T!
O: Oh yes I did!
M: Oh look, this isn't a space game!
(pause)
O: Yes it is!
M: No it isn't!
(pause)
M: It's just a broken tech demo!
O: No it isn't!
M: It IS!
O: It is NOT!
M: You just contradicted yourself!
O: No I didn't!
M: You DID!
O: No no no!
M: You did just then!
O: Nonsense!
M: (exasperated) Oh, this is futile!!
(pause)
O: No it isn't!
M: Yes it is!
(pause)
M: I came here for a good space game!
O: AH, no you didn't, you came here for minimum viable space game!
M: A space game isn't just walking around!
O: Well! it CAN be!
M: No it can't!
M: A space game is a connected series of gameplay components intended to represent actual space and gameplay!
O: No it isn't!
M: Yes it is! "isn't" is just avoiding the problem!
O: Look, if I release a space game to you, it must be a space game!
M: Yes but it isn't just saying "this is a space game".
O: Yes it is!
M: No it isn't!
O: Yes it is!
M: No it isn't!
O: Yes it is!
M: No it ISN'T! Space games are actually games set in space. Saying "this is a space game" is a total misrepresentation of space games.
O: It is NOT!
M: It is!
O: Not at all!
M: It is!
(The Arguer hits a bell on his desk and stops.)
O: Thank you, game has shipped.
M: (stunned) What?
O: That's it. You got your MVP.
M: But I was just getting interested!
O: I'm sorry, the five minutes is up.
M: That was never five minutes just now!!
O: I'm afraid it was.
M: (leading on) No it wasn't.....
O: I'm sorry, I'm not allowed to pretend it's a space game any more.
M: WHAT??
O: If you want me to keep pretending it's a space game, you'll have to pledge for another five minutes.
M: But that was never five minutes just now!
Oh Come on!
Oh this is...
This is ridiculous!
O: I told you... I told you, I'm not allowed to pretend it's a space game unless you pledge!
M: Oh all right. (takes out his wallet and pledges again.) There you are.
O: Thank you.
M: (clears throat) Well...
O: Well WHAT?
M: That was never five minutes just now.
O: I told you, I'm not allowed to pretend it's a space game unless you've pledged!
M: Well I just pledged!
O: No you didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: YOU didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: YOU didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: YOU didn't!
M: I DID!!!
O: YOU didn't!
M: I don't want to play any more!
O: Well I'm very sorry but you didn't pledge!
M: Ah hah! Well if I didn't pledge, why are you pretending it's a space game??? Ah HAAAAAAHHH! Gotcha!
O: No you haven't!
M: Yes I have! If you're pretending it's a space game, I must have pledged.
O: Not necessarily. I could be pretending it's a space game in my spare time.
M: I've had enough of this!
O: No you haven't.
M: Oh shut up!
(Man leaves the office and enters the next office)
Man: I want to complain.
Complainer: You want to complain! Look at this reddit. I've only had it three weeks and the drat thing keeps screaming BRIGADING
Man: No, I want to complain about...
Complainer: If you complain nothing happens, you might as well not bother.
Man: Oh!
Complainer: There's no fidelity, it's not immersive and I'm sick and tired of the excuses.
(Slams door. walks down corridor, opens next door. Gets hit on the head as he steps through.)
Man: Hello, I want to... ouch!
Spreaders: No, no, no. Hold your head like this, then go DREAMS. Try it again. (hits him on the head again)
Man: owwww!
Spreaders: Better, Better, but DREAMS, DREAMS! Hold your wallet out.
Man: No.
Spreaders: Now..
Man: DREAMS!!!!
Spreaders: Good, Good! That's it.
Man: Stop hitting me!!
Spreaders: What?
Man: Stop hitting me!!
Spreaders: Stop hitting you?
Man: Yes!
Spreaders: What did you come in here for?
Man: I came here to complain.
Spreaders: Oh no, that's next door. It's being-taken-for-all-your-money-mugging lessons in here.
Man: What a stupid concept.
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Aug 28, 2018 01:23
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Christ gently caress what is this game even
it's not a game
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Sep 10, 2018 12:21
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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where can I play the sand planet level with the giant sandworms and giant spaceship wrecks and giant sandstorms? They showed this poo poo years ago.
where can I play the content they showed last year where I go on some fetch quest and have to rescue some kidnapped woman or something? They showed this poo poo but it's still nowhere to be seen.
Why do people think CIG is actually doing anything?
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Sep 11, 2018 02:01
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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That thread title just can't be beaten
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Sep 30, 2018 00:58
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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It's more like MAGA Al Bundy. The average joes who will uncritically support everything Trump does.
Venn diagram etc
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Nov 1, 2018 04:17
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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"Do our marketing work for worthless JPEGs"
I guess if you can immediately flip them on the grey market they might not be completely worthless, but these contests are always scams
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Nov 2, 2018 00:26
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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I'm pretty sure that the actual mechanics reason for this change was that they can't fix the bug where you can travel an infinite distance as long as you do it in one jump. See the QT fuel doesn't get drained mid-jump, only at the end. And for some reason their code is so poo poo that they can't run a simple check "Is this jump far enough that I shouldn't be able to do it?" Instead they deduct your QT fuel at the end of your jump. So you can have 5k fuel, make a 10k jump, and you'll still get there- albeit with 0 fuel and be unable to make another jump.
Rather than fix their code, they just made the jumps real short. Now you'll be dropping out of warp all the time so you'll constantly recalculate your QT fuel remaining. I'd bet anything the "Can jump farther than your QT fuel allows" bug is still there, but now it'll be hard to trigger because the jump will have to be shorter than 20 seconds or whatever.
This reeks of a first year developer decision.
if this is true, holey moley
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Nov 2, 2018 10:25
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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To pick up on the industry talk, I think it's pretty much a given that games have to get smaller. Forget PS3, I'd be thrilled with a PS2-quality game done right. Or a pixel art DIY project that was small and cost a few dollars, as long as it gave me a bit of solid gameplay. I like to dabble, a lot.
Music in the 19th century was a mix of elitist orchestral and at-home hobbyist. Pop music emerged to fill in the gap..smaller songs, simpler and more modest, but somehow more fun in their own way. And the genres were/are accessible with practice and a creative mind. The same thing has to happen with gaming.
I mean, I think we sort of had it in the 80s and part of the 90s, at least in the PC market. But development then was still something of an alchemic art. With modern tools things are much simpler -- again, practice and effort is needed to make something good, but the payoff ceiling is much, much lower.
I think it will happen. The gaming public has to mature a bit -- people have to want to contribute and make their own stuff. Like with pop music, a whole ecosystem of home strummers, garage bands, local talents, touring groups, and superstars has to emerge. But I'm optimistic we'll get there.
Ugh, gaming has never been better or more diverse than right now. When's the last time you actually played a pc game?
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Nov 4, 2018 03:52
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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And how is that different than Hearthstone ? Remember when everybody was laughing at Blizzard for making a card game ? They can't be successfull with that, ah ah... argeubeugha.
They're completely different games. Card games work fine on mobile, they're perfect for the mobile actually. And there is also a game client on PC.
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Nov 5, 2018 00:01
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Store Citizer: Please wait 5 minutes for the client to crash
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Nov 6, 2018 03:36
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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I think I've found the perfect game that citizens can actually play and get what they want. I just saw the latest Robbaz video of him buying a PC and playing a game inside another game (and plenty of other madness) in 'my summer car' which he calls a Finland simulator.
Here's the whole playlist, which is pure gold, but watch the latest video to see what I mean.
My Summer Car: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLo1nDt_-WWnUsdns8zTgF7OuTJ5r0gEsr
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Nov 8, 2018 04:43
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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But I'm pretty sure that the entire original design document was thrown out long, long ago.
lol, just stop right there
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Nov 8, 2018 22:52
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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What are they even shooting at?
I think there was one guy who must have had a crime rating or something, you can see them hitting him near the end but he is just running around ignoring it.
Fidelity!
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Nov 11, 2018 23:03
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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people keep saying this is a bad haircut, but it just looks like she's wearing a service cap to me
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Nov 16, 2018 10:41
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Lol, didn't think anything could be as good as the original
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Jan 1, 2019 09:21
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Every fan of a poo poo scam game in development has parrotted "the development build is soooo much better guys, for sure"
I've seen it since day one of hype in the industry.
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Jan 13, 2019 10:30
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 15, 2024 14:25
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- starkebn
- May 18, 2004
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"Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"
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Creepy dude leaving USB drive on table is good. What versauce said is bad.
Start citizen fan art created by the power of mushrooms good. Miku vr chat adventures bad.
I concur, but I think the access codes for the Mirificus bot have been lost a long time ago.
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Jan 14, 2019 00:03
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Jul 12, 2018 11:52
