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From my point of view jedis are evil  Make a story about jedi just meddling in regular people's lives and only doing more damage despite having the best intentions. Jedi are already annoying paladin type, realize it as a scifi aciton comedy.
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Apr 12, 2019 23:25
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Bortus posted:I’m glad to see lando is in it. Hoping they can pigeonhole some other people I remember from other Star Wars movies into it The trashcan robot and the little mouse bot better make an appearance! Also another fat slug thing and tentacle hole and trash octopus imo
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Apr 12, 2019 23:53
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Skywalker Farm: The Truth They Don't Want You To Know. Jedi ghosts? WOOKIES? ALIENS!?
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Apr 13, 2019 00:38
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Hairy Busey posted:I identify as Yoda: a gross little man who lives in a swamp and trolls both sides Yoda's love.
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Apr 13, 2019 03:24
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super sweet best pal posted:Like I've said before, if 4-6 were a WW2 allegory, the sequels should've been a Cold War spy series with both sides having Death Stars to represent mutually assured destruction. That would actually be kind of cool. So it'll never happen. No matter the circumstances, it has to be plucky heroes against overwhelming empire!
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Apr 13, 2019 03:30
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The New Republic Freedom Star has assured the spread of democracy, order and peace across the galaxy. But is it really such a beacon of good and lawful power as its projected to be? A young Jedi gets dragged into a conspiracy that stretches far beyond the outer rim. Black sites? Old imperial measures and agents? The deeper it goes, the darker it gets.
Colonel Cancer fucked around with this message at 03:40 on Apr 13, 2019 |
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Apr 13, 2019 03:38
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Freedom Star with a large "mission accomplished" banner. President Luke Skywalker giving impassioned speech.
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Apr 13, 2019 03:47
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Hairy Busey posted:You mean President Han Solo Yer right. A tricky scoundrel to the end. I'm thinking he turns into space Nixon, and ends up opposed by the jedis whom he watergates.
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Apr 13, 2019 03:52
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Rebels will use individually piloted fighters to kamikaze empire
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Apr 13, 2019 04:06
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skasion posted:do you think obi wan cut his junk off Much possible is, with the force.
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Apr 14, 2019 00:06
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Star war never changes.
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Apr 14, 2019 01:07
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I'd like to get away from these star wars and zoom into the exciting life of a small-time jizz wailer.
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Apr 14, 2019 01:10
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I want to see that blue elephant from cantina but as an elite pilot and rake, with two bodacious alien babes.
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Apr 14, 2019 01:21
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The lightsaber is a metaphor, for a man's shaft, you see. It goes up and down and sometimes makes a fun y noise.
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Apr 14, 2019 22:57
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Pal Patine.
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Apr 14, 2019 23:01
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I think solo was a fun romp but that robot character was a hosed up caricature of progressive movements. Disney Wars not very good.
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Apr 14, 2019 23:57
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Hairy Busey posted:The prequels are far more.memoriablr than the Disney movies, and indeed are better movies. Just watch them in a foreign language without subtitles and they are actually pretty decent That was my experience with the prequels, at least the first two, and yeah they are so much better without the English audio. You lose the racist as gently caress accents, poo poo doesn't sound as dumb and the story just looks like underpolished space opera with impressive (for its time) effects.
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Apr 15, 2019 01:51
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You know what would make the first order work? Just get rid of nu death star, keep them the same bunch of neo-imperial losers but they figure out how to use spaceships like relativistic missiles with Force or whatever. So they 9/11 coruscant, and the rest follows existing material.
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Apr 15, 2019 13:03
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Nobody. No. Body. OK Rey was definitely fathered (and possibly birthed) by the disembodied spirit of Palpatine.
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Apr 15, 2019 14:13
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Luke's disappearing act wasn't an off screen death, he just learned Force Teleport and will be doing it all the time to everyone's annoyance.
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Apr 16, 2019 00:16
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Fanboys rise up
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Apr 16, 2019 01:34
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If you think watto was bad just wait till you see Jar Jar Binks!
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Apr 16, 2019 08:32
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Wait I thought jedis were supposed to be Jewish. Jedaism, Judaism...
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Apr 16, 2019 08:45
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Applewhite posted:It would explain the stylized priestly breastplate Vader wears... And he's definitely circumcised!
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Apr 16, 2019 08:55
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What happened to Jar Jar in Revenge of the Sith anyways? He basically disappeared from the movies by then right? He should have delivered Annie's babies instead of that dumb robot imo
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Apr 19, 2019 03:35
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SciFiDownBeat posted:He served as padme's proxy in the Senate while she was pregnant and was the one who proposed ceding emergency powers to sheev which allowed him to take power Yeah but imagine how much more epic it would be if he also pulled the babbies out of padme and be like "Uh oh! Twin babbies" and drop one on the floor.
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Apr 19, 2019 03:54
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Vim Fuego posted:Ok, where does it say the emperor's name was Sheev? And, is it short for Sheeven? Sheeverus actually.
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Apr 19, 2019 06:12
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Any-kin
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Apr 19, 2019 15:44
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Death star ruins inhabited by mad mutant ewoks wearing scraps of storm trooper uniforms.
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Apr 19, 2019 16:13
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In OT, space ghost good. In ST, space ghost bad! My expectations about force ghosts are subverted.
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Apr 20, 2019 15:07
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It's cool if you put a deathstick in your butt, the Force will never know!
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Apr 22, 2019 03:07
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Applewhite posted:Why was a guy selling loose cigarettes in a bar anyway? Were cigarettes illegal in the Space Weimar Republic? Just heavily taxed. Jedi sin taxes, you know? They could have sauntered in to any ol' space trading post and gotten perfectly legal death sticks but paid 3 times as much!
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Apr 22, 2019 03:32
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Peak space oil
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Apr 23, 2019 05:25
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Solo was infinitely more watchable imo. I tried to hit up Last Jedi on Netflix and couldn't get past the loving chase scene.
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Apr 23, 2019 05:36
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skasion posted:Well I mean yeah, that’s the point. It’s an important part of how Lucas sets up the prequel Jedi as morally limited if not outright corrupt. Slavery has always been a big part of the Star Wars universe (think how C3PO and R2D2 are treated, like literal hardware to be auctioned off, not allowed in bars, even though we know they are basically people). How is this compatible with Jedi “for a thousand generations”? The whole question that the prequels are created to answer is essentially “if you’re so smart, how come you ain’t rich” to the Jedi. If they were so good and wise, how did two guys wipe them out? And why would someone genuinely good, like Anakin once was, convince himself that it was right to do so? Answer: they weren’t that good. They — even the good ones like Qui-Gon — let evil go on everywhere, telling themselves it was none of their business, until it bit their asses right off. Anakin being a slave whom they hypocritically free because it serves them is what shapes his whole attitude to the order’s moral teaching. So what you are saying is, the rebels - what an apt name, by the way - are basically Confederate rising up again and again.
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Apr 23, 2019 14:51
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Maybe the bad guy, Chester Chesterton, is tracking his memaw through force and the tracking button doesn't work and is just a button. And the ship blew up because it was full of space dynamite not some relativistic kill missile. Plot holes fixed!
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Apr 23, 2019 18:09
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Truth hurts bud. If you ever tell your kid that his dog is going to the farm or replace his dead brainless gold fish with an identical one, you are basically chaotic evil.
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Apr 24, 2019 01:20
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skasion posted:You know what really sucks about the prequels? We never see any of the Jedi Masters’ bedrooms. I bet Yoda has a sweet pad. I think they showed Yoda bachelor pad/meditation chamber. It wasn't great. Mooey Cow posted:In earlier revisions of TPM, the Jedi wore more elaborate clothes, but this was changed at some point to the desert farmer outfit Obi-wan wears in the OT, and it's been said they wear these simple robes to symbolize their compassion for the lowliest people in the galaxy or something like that. Which of course is massively hypocritical as they spend most of their time actually running errands for the most powerful, and when they actually encounter those whose clothes they wear, they do very little to help them; Obi-wan even considering Anakin "another pathetic lifeform". So what you're saying is that jedis should sell dark side indulgences?
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Apr 24, 2019 14:34
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Maybe when they said Vader hunted down and killed like a million jedis, he was just going after random moisture farmers in lovely robes?
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Apr 24, 2019 14:48
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Yeah living on tattoine is like the one not dumb decision the old man makes.
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Apr 24, 2019 15:16
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