UFOs are real

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > UFOs are real

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

So, is there literally any poo poo from all the recent brouhaha that isn't "this guy is totally with the government and he's seeeeeeeen them!" or the same lovely photos and videos that were being made in the 70s, but now with Duke Nukem video effects?

# ¿ Aug 21, 2023 04:57

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 02:50

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Just a normal day at the conspiracy factory

quote:

Ex-NASA Engineer: There Is Extraterrestrial Activity In Saturn's Rings, Earth-Size UFO Spotted

Wow, as big as the earth, you say? Gosh.

Given you can see Saturn with the naked eye and easily see it with even hobby grade telescopes, you'd think this amazing discovery would be more well known.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2023 08:15

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Mystery solved

# ¿ Aug 25, 2023 14:52

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

They're concealing their arrivals as space launches by landing while travelling backwards in time.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2023 10:31

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Also we have written records of the Egyptian dudes who oversaw the building of some of the pyramids

Plus the buried remains of the worker towns around the pyramid/temple complexes. Right down to graffiti complaining about the beer and the names of their worker groups.

�The Friends of Khufu Gang,� �Vigorous Gang, �Those Who Know Unas,� or the �Drunkards of Menkaure.�

Real world is so much cooler that the drivel these idiots cook up in their heads.

# ¿ Aug 31, 2023 13:31

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

From reddit: "The best UFO footage could be the greatest leak, totally not CGI we promise"

https://i.imgur.com/EAdivEe.mp4

It's a loving pot lid. Someone found a very similar design on amazon

https://www.amazon.com/Creuset-Signature-Enameled-Cast-Iron-Cookware/dp/B08X7J82NZ?th=1

Others noted how the camera doesn't even follow the UFO - almost like it's not even there and was added later.

# ¿ Sep 1, 2023 16:10

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Not being able to see poo poo is how you know it's real!

# ¿ Sep 1, 2023 17:24

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

lol at Reddit going wild at "Mexican government showing pictures of aliens" and it's just the same dumb fucks being asked questions in a small room with pictures from the X-files.

Look at this stupid thing, it looks like someone carved up a chorizo

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 07:53

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

UFO spotted on google maps it's a loving bird

Feel free to jump to the 30 second mark if you don't want to watch an idiot using google maps poorly

https://i.imgur.com/1H3du5R.mp4

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 08:01

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

We have discovered alien life in Italy

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 08:22

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

1000 year old alien mummies, just carrying them around in a box to show off to politicians. As you do.

Definitely normal actions carried out by people with literal corpses of people from outer space. You'd think the mummies would be worth their own press conference maybe.

Nope, show 'em off to politicians only.

Maybe they're going to give out one of those sand drawings in a bottle made from Genuine Alien Sand?

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 14:34

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

mediaphage posted:

that�s iberico my friend

Psyop from the Italian CIA.

The CIAO

I stole this joke

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 17:45

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

and the lols start coming and they don't stop coming

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 17:53

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

It's amazing how they realised how pathetically fake their alien looked and their big idea to hide it was to just loving toss handfulls of sand over it.

jokes posted:

I'm the really happy blood pressure monitor slash thermometer on the bottom left

It's not even that, it's a cheap thermometer with space for two readouts. I have one on my fridge.

# ¿ Sep 13, 2023 18:55

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Turns out the skeletons have been around for years and were thoroughly debunked - no surprise.

r/damnthatsinteresting - 2 minute video on all the bullshit

Mismatched bones, bones facing the wrong way and a llama skull turned backwards.

# ¿ Sep 14, 2023 03:09

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

lol

And the true believers are already walking it back on r/UFOs.

https://twitter.com/uncertainvector/status/1702023350803959988

Just yesterday they were crying that the world media was refusing to cover this irrefutable proof. Today it's "it's such a tough battle to find the truth with all these grifters and fakers."

# ¿ Sep 14, 2023 03:20

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

r/legos throwing shade

# ¿ Sep 14, 2023 08:24

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

naem posted:

so alien enthusiasts are a bit much and insist all kinds of very specific things exist based on no to very little evidence and jump to conclusions and it�s like religion and an identity at this point

BUT skeptics are also like, just as weird about it and their identity is that there aren�t aliens, and one could land and shake their hand and say �hello here are your free hoverboots and atomic fusion earthling� and they�d still deny it

both sides seem to be completely irrational

No, that's wrong and stupid.

# ¿ Sep 16, 2023 12:00

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Oh I'm goddamn fascinated by the entire thing and have been for decades. I grew up watching SPOOOOOOOOKY shows like In Search Of:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zK4PGCQQ4Oc

..... and reading SPOOOOOOOKY books like this:

Had that exact book. It was great.

Also loved the Mr Spok show.

# ¿ Sep 16, 2023 12:34

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

SniperWoreConverse posted:

p sure some drugs still work if they're chirally flipped, but have different effects, so it's not as simple as a coin flip imo

Thalidomide is the most effective treatment for morning sickness ever develiped. Gets totally rid of all symptoms with no side effects.

Its enantiomer, however, causes flipper babies.

# ¿ Sep 17, 2023 09:39

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

500excf type r posted:

UFOs are real, aliens are real, we have bodies, we have materials, etc

And as we all know, anecdotes are even better then evidence!

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

most likely because it experimental military aircraft. If it does well, then they want to keep it secret, if it fails, well, they definitely want to keep it secret

If the spooks only get involved in the cases where it's a classified plane, that immediately tells everyone, "Hey, it's a classified plane" in huge letters of fire.

The only way they can operate is to rub themselves on everything.

Even the chorizo aliens

Megillah Gorilla fucked around with this message at 09:42 on Sep 17, 2023

# ¿ Sep 17, 2023 09:40

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

500excf type r posted:

You underestimate the collective understanding of the celestial bodies observed by humanity for the last 60,000 years or so

The celestial spheres and epicycle type understanding or the dung beetle pushing the sun across the sky type understanding?

Megillah Gorilla fucked around with this message at 10:01 on Sep 17, 2023

# ¿ Sep 17, 2023 09:58

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

mediaphage posted:

lol man both threads are really insufferable tbqh

What's the other one? Always down for a good laugh.

# ¿ Sep 18, 2023 05:24

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

If you want to know why chirality is conserved, it's very simple.

It's because biochemistry is stupid.

# ¿ Sep 18, 2023 08:44

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

No. 6 posted:

Snoop gave up ganja

It was an ad.

He said he was giving up "smoke". A couple days later he starts promoting some smokeless fire pit.

# ¿ Dec 5, 2023 09:40

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

to post that. Tragic.

# ¿ Dec 13, 2023 17:09

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Non Compos Mentis posted:

besides the aliens taking mh370 for sex experiments or sexperiments, there is also meant to be some big reveal of aliens on the 23rd because some shortwave radio nut found a secret code being transmitted by what sounds like dogmen because they say they are canine

Ah yes, shortwave radio.

The choice of all advanced interstellar civilisation who need to bounce radio waves off the ionosphere because they have no other way or transmitting information over the horizon.

# ¿ Dec 15, 2023 14:34

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

mediaphage posted:

shouldve stopped at the fourth panel

# ¿ Dec 16, 2023 17:39

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Well, I'm convinced.

# ¿ Jan 6, 2024 04:36

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

temple posted:

Literally this old joke:

Goddamn, though. I can barely even conceive the level of contempt the person who made this video must have for the UFO community.

Just sheer unbridled justified contempt.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2024 11:21

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Drink-Mix Man posted:

So is this thread like all for real atheistic about whether UFOs could be aliens or do you just like roasting the grifters?

Mate, I would absolutely love to see evidence that alien life exists. The idea that it might have visited this world is one that sets my mind on fire.

But all I've ever seen are pathetic excuses for "evidence" like chorizo aliens and guano UFOs.

And grifters. Endless grifters.

From the self-centred racist grift of the von D�nikens of the 70s to the slick grift of internet nobodies pretending to be bigshots and their parade of guests with "inside knowledge" and that "any day now" the truth will out.

As the Amazing Randy used to say, extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. Bird poo poo on a camera lens and CGI inserts is not that.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2024 11:28

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

# ¿ Jan 14, 2024 15:29

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

I don't know if it's a new video, but it's a whole new level of bullshit.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2024 13:42

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

Non Compos Mentis posted:

what if the aliens taste really good

Those chorizo aliens did look delicious.

# ¿ Jan 29, 2024 04:14

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

SniperWoreConverse posted:

Those old rarebit fiend comics got even more super hosed up a century later

Dammit, half an hour late to make this joke :argh:

# ¿ Feb 20, 2024 04:09

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

SniperWoreConverse posted:

This is what our tax dollars are paying for, bold new frontiers. This woman may get a Nobel

If Musk can get one

# ¿ Feb 24, 2024 10:37

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

There's a new "alien" on the grift circuit.

Doesn't look as tasty as the chorizo one, though.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2024 12:52

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# ¿ May 17, 2024 02:50

Megillah Gorilla: Sep 22, 2003; If only all of life's problems could be solved by smoking a professor of ancient evil texts.; Bread Liar

lol

# ¿ Mar 20, 2024 04:00

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > UFOs are real