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Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



In an advice space where "give me your house" has happened multiple times, "I need to wear your dress, c'monnnn" is practically wholesome

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Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...




So you're saying he wasn't some sort of superhero trying desperately to hide his secret life of fighting crime and solving problems down in the sewers

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



kntfkr posted:

Bathroom dad sounds like a piece of poo poo. Maybe it's child porn. Or he has something like IBS and won't tell his wife or get treatment and he's just a loving jerk all around.

IBS or something like that was my first thought, but then I figured there's probably no way folks around you wouldn't be aware of it unless you have some sort of speedily sound/scentproofed bathroom.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Mx. posted:

I (32f) am having a hard time feeling attracted to my husband (35m) due to his incontinence issues

quote:


He gets really angry when I suggest seeing a doctor and acts like these are just normal accidents.

And so the thread finally wraps back around to the goon who adamantly argued a few iterations ago that it was perfectly normal, expected even, to poo poo one's pants upon surpassing the hoary old age of 30

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Batterypowered7 posted:

I don't remember that, but I remember WampaLord being incredulous that people could hold in their farts.

I can't 100% remember who it was, but it was definitely someone else. As I recall it involved one time on the subway and at least one other incident, when I questioned them on it they leaned into the whole "it's normal" argument pretty strongly.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Solenna posted:

If she doesn't trust him enough to do that then there is a bigger problem.

I mean, he's definitively the type of absolute m*nchild to get whiny at the thought of not getting to see his superhero movie day one because of the slight inconvenience of being prepared to have a child on that day. I wouldn't trust him for a second to not shut off or just "not hear" his phone.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Rereading it, she doesn't even care about it and he's preemptively making plans to just show up hours later if she has to go in. I don't even know why we're debating it, in retrospect.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Evil Willow posted:

AITA For giving my BF conditions on me moving in with him

They have reasonable personal concerns about being around dogs, but I think that just means it was as much of a nonstarter relationship as disagreeing about religion or politics. I was actually surprised when I scrolled back up and saw it was a 3 year relationship rather than the 3 month one my brain substituted in, I have no idea how it lasted that long :iiam:

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Just hanging out with my hot young 22 year old girlfriend :c00lbert:

Now if you'll excuse me I need to go to bed, it's 10PM and I'm all tuckered out

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for threatening to uninvite my mom to the wedding when she expressed doubts about my fiancée?

Solid spoiler reveal, that was not in any of my guesses

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



My dad was clearly in terrible pain, which sucked, so I had a few beers

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Lol I went back to reread it assuming dad had made some kind of "you won't be able to help anyway, please save the ice fishing tradition", which I could see some sympathy for, but no, dude just apparently decided to stay on his own.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Having children is just an investment into getting future grandchildren, I don't know why the daughter can't see this

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



I don't think I've ever had a homemade lasagna without ricotta, it works perfectly well.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



moonmazed posted:

botfly guy owns and i support him in his endeavors

Finding the most creative way to get broken up with?

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



I haven't been to that many gyro places, but I don't think I've ever seen a pork gyro.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Yeah, I lucked out and found a place with its own washer/dryer, all the years I lived in an apartment complex with a communal laundry were just a dire constant source of stress.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Hughlander posted:

"Sir you have picked the wrong one as did I, goodbye."

Too good for this thread

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Sisal Two-Step posted:

quote:

My ex husband's wife berated me in a long text talking about how I caused a scene and used my son as a tool to get back at his dad when I could've worked things out like a "mature adult"

"Like my husband, who stole his son's birthday present and broke it"

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



El Spamo posted:

How in the world do you break a game console.

Just, how? Do you open-palm slam the game disc into the slot and start doing all the tekken moves at full force?

I think the pawn gambit makes sense, I wasn't thinking too deeply about it when I read it.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for telling my brother that his and his fiancées choices for their wedding are offensive and ridiculous?

No, I will not be providing further context at this time

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Halloween Jack posted:

quote:

not knowing that I have an app that records all my phone conversations automatically

What in tarnation

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



"I’ll crash before I stop playing pikmin" - man who crashed while playing pikmin

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for arguing with my aunt and stating that I refuse to "address her by her husbands rank"?

The actual rank makes me think it's fake because there's only like 50 rear admirals in the US coast guard and that feels a little too potentially identifying to post. On the other hand military spouses hijacking their partners rank is absolutely a thing that happens.

Yeah, I'd believe some weirdos are like that but there's no way that specific setup is anything but a last second gag.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Mx. posted:

AITA for refusing to stop calling my 9 yo son "honey"?

i get called honey by old ladies at the shops on the regular and i would not call all of them my romantic partner

I assumed it was gonna be the 9yo being embarrassed, but OP managed to pull a classic AITA switcheroo

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Mx. posted:

quote:

I think she’s being ridiculous and her mom reached out to call me a douchebag.

Lmao :owned:

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



The Walrus posted:

lot of people itt not recognizing that steaming is the best way to cook most veg

I hated so many vegetables due to mainly having them steamed as a kid, and then I finally realized roasting them was an option

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Ethiser posted:

What? I’ve never lived anywhere in the US where I couldn’t get steaming hot water from the sink after like two minutes tops.

I stopped using that for anything food related after hearing how much junk can leach into hot water from typical heaters and pipes. Fortunately, electric kettles are also legal to purchase in the United States!

Captain Hygiene fucked around with this message at 19:19 on Feb 16, 2022

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Uncle Enzo posted:

That said, had OP considered, like, giving it a shot for a while? See where things go? She doesn't have to by any means and she isn't an rear end in a top hat for saying no. But man imagine just baldly spurning someone's friendship like that.

If someone wholeheartedly launches themselves multiple times in ways that you find very annoying, you've already given it a shot and seen where things would go

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



edgeman83 posted:

AITA for hiding my son from my boyfriend?

"I mean, what's a single year, really, anyway? Not even 10% of the age gap in our relationship, smh"

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



a podcast for cats posted:

Saw this opinion article on Reddit, clicked idly and quickly realised it's has some thread tropes:

Spoiler alert: a NY Times columnist is a terrible person and justifies it in stereotypical ways.

:stare:

Maybe find somewhere else to work out your issues

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Mx. posted:

AITA for going out to eat alone after my SIL gave her children my food?

I'd be mad and maybe go out to eat too, but I've also gotten plenty of food with my name on it just because I was the person to order, so I could see at least a little chance that it wasn't malicious. Mainly because it seems they just plopped all the food down and said to go for it, without taking two seconds to mention any details like a normal person.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Oh derp, I skipped a bit of it. I'm feeling too charitable lately I guess

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



bell jar posted:

I can't get over the fact that apparently most houses don't have fences in the USA.

News to me

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Evil Willow posted:

AITA for refusing to abide by my girlfriends overly strict house rules?

quote:

I’ll throw them away within a day or so

Narrator posted:

ONE

WEEK

LATER

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for not wanting to celebrate my mom on MY birthday?

Lol, another solid AITA twist. One sentence in and thinking 'you're 25, who cares if your mom has the same birthday' and then it zagged on me

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



When You're Here, You're Family, And Conversely If You Don't Come Here, You May Not Be Family Much LongerTM

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Absurd Alhazred posted:

Girlfriend (27) was poly when I (M27) when I met her. She has been monogamous with me, but she has gone back to being poly without telling me. Is it cheating?


Nowhere does he say there was an actual conversation they had about becoming strictly monogamous. :shrug:

Both have terminal dumbness for not having that conversation and/or changing an existing aspect of their relationship without having a conversation, the relationship should quietly die in peace

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Mx. posted:

**cheated on him

Lol, whoopsie

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Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



Absurd Alhazred posted:

AITA for refusing to babysit for my sister and leaving her without anyone to watch her kids?





Wishing her the best with her new life.

:hellyeah: ditch those assholes

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