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BurntCornMuffin posted:That was more like oldpainful. my job here is done *rides off into the sunset like Brody at the end of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade*
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Jan 9, 2020 16:45
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Plank Walker posted:baby jesus is a totally different character who has faster acceleration than adult jesus but lower top speed
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Jan 9, 2020 19:51
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DandyLion posted:Cumshitter's one of those true gems though. cum shitter isnt a gimmick he is sincere and he isnt wrong
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Jan 10, 2020 00:09
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snergle posted:cum shitter isnt a gimmick he is sincere and he isnt wrong when i'm rich i want to contribute to his large pile of CUM (capital under management)
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Jan 10, 2020 00:21
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snergle posted:cum shitter isnt a gimmick he is sincere and he isnt wrong That's what I'm saying. His gimmick is truth. That's why it works so well I think.
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Jan 10, 2020 00:43
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Everyone who added a gimmick poster to my list is incorrect, those gimmicks are/were exhaustingly unfunny. I will not be taking questions.
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Jan 10, 2020 01:35
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Captain Monkey posted:Everyone who added a gimmick poster to my list is incorrect, those gimmicks are/were exhaustingly unfunny. I will not be taking questions. Why not?
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Jan 10, 2020 01:42
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LifeSunDeath posted:This dude gets it Scratch Monkey posted:pretty sure that's a Dragonball character Antivehicular posted:I was thinking "Roy Orbison wrapped in so much clingfilm he ascended to a higher state of being"
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Jan 10, 2020 01:59
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snergle posted:cum shitter isnt a gimmick he is sincere and he isnt wrong I have visited Cumshitters business holes and received sound financial advice.
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Jan 10, 2020 02:02
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DarkSoulsTantrum posted:I have visited Cumshitters business holes and received sound financial advice. Yeah but the smell though...... exquisite.
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Jan 10, 2020 02:04
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I felt so proud driving my new car around. Gassing it up to 100 on the highway made me feel excited. Honking the horn at red lights made me laugh. I didnt give a drat about what that car cost me. Yeah, I had to sleep in bed with dad for half a year to get the Nova. After mom died, Dad had no luck dating. We met a few of his first dates: friendly, cool women. After each date hed return to the house and tell us about how he hosed up by admitting something negative about himself or by talking about how lonely he was. Dad wanted women that were way out of his league, even with his money, and we all knew it. Him included. He never paid much attention to my sister, I guess she was too fat for him. But me, he always liked me. Around the time I entered middle school he would grab my hips and pull me towards him, lining us up. This is how you were born! hed say, making no sense. Date after date after date, and never a second meeting. He blew it with every nice woman in town. Every once in a while hed go out with someone that liked him, but afterwards at home hed tell us about all of her flaws and why it wouldnt work. Then, after my sister went to bed, hed come into my room wearing a speedo and try to hug me. After awhile he became bold and declared his scheme: if I slept in bed with him every night for 6 months, hed buy me a used Pontiac Nova. He didnt specify what year, but I had to think about it for a whole five minutes before I agreed. In the beginning I was pretty grossed out by all the chip crumbs in bed and such. Mom was in charge of getting Dad new underwear, and since her death he had never replenished the stash. Stains were rampant and undeniably wrong. Every night he would spoon me. Sometimes hed pulse a bit, breathing hard, nibbling at my ear. Other times hed fall asleep with a hand on my shoulder. Whatever it was, I counted the days until my car. Id be free. Finally the day came. He had a couple friends down at the dealership, two brothers, and they showed us to a late-model Nova. Did I expect better? Yeah. Was I disappointed? Not really. I didnt say one word to either brother, but after a bunch of back-slapping and guffaws father and I were leaving the lot in separate vehicles. This was it. Later that night, as I was about to leave to pick up Megan for the first-ever ride, I could hear a noise coming from Dads room. He was crying. Prying the door open, he noticed me. Youre never gonna sleep with me again, son. I looked at my watch and then stared at his back. He was sniffling like a baby. Since moms gone you dont need me any more. I didnt know what to do, but I had to get out of there to pick up Megan soon. Why why dont you come down to Jamingos Pizzeria with us, dad? Itll be cool. He turned around, bottle of whiskey in hand, with a huge smile on his face. Do ya mean it?? he asked. When I answered in the affirmative, he scooped up his waist size 44 pants and dashed over to me with a huge alcohol-laden hug. I got in the drivers seat while he took up most of the back of the car. After picking up Megan, who was definitely more than a little disappointed upon discovering the identity of my first passenger, we were making our way to Jamingos at last. On Nutler street the lights shot up behind me and I knew I was being pulled over. Dad was farting and belching rapid-fire in the back seat. The policeman shined his light and saw dads crack and immediately drew his pistol. It was all over. Years later, I think about what that car cost me. If I could get rid of the Nova and have my dad back, Id do it in a second.
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Jan 10, 2020 09:09
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Regarding SA's role as arch enemy of perpetually delayed non-game Star Citizen in the minds of its fans:Beet Wagon posted:Imagine finally realizing that the dragon you dedicated yourself to slaying over the last four years was actually just a windmill full of idiots yelling "I'm gay" at each other lol
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Jan 10, 2020 09:17
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Mods please rename one/all subfora "a windmill full of idiots" tia
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Jan 10, 2020 09:46
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Jan 10, 2020 11:36
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it's a copypasta, hate to disappoint also  is infinitely superior to and more people should use it
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Jan 10, 2020 12:11
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razorrozar posted:it's a copypasta, hate to disappoint They both work in their own contexts. It's like the various psyducks.
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Jan 10, 2020 12:14
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Yeah they both have their places
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Jan 10, 2020 12:27
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What happened to the Star Citizen forum?
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Jan 10, 2020 12:36
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Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:What happened to the Star Citizen forum?
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Jan 10, 2020 12:45
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frankenfreak posted:Since it had like 2 active threads, it got closed and those threads moved back into Games. It was just something I checked once or twice a year to see if Star Citizen was done yet. Did they ever release it or is it still just a con?
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Jan 10, 2020 12:46
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Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:It was just something I checked once or twice a year to see if Star Citizen was done yet. Did they ever release it or is it still just a con?
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Jan 10, 2020 13:22
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90s Cringe Rock posted:Yeah it's out and it's everything you ever dreamed of. That's why the forums are dying, everyone left to go play star citizen. Not me though, first person games make me nauseous so I'll be posting forever. Sorry.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:28
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Facebook Aunt posted:That's why the forums are dying, everyone left to go play star citizen. Not me though, first person games make me nauseous so I'll be posting forever. Sorry. Good news friend, you can post on SA through Star Citizen now! Only $225 for the Anvil Shitpost interface console!
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Jan 10, 2020 13:31
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I'm not paying a penny for Star Citizen until they finally implement restaurant reservations
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Jan 10, 2020 13:32
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Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:It was just something I checked once or twice a year to see if Star Citizen was done yet. Did they ever release it or is it still just a con? Seriously though, the latest lol I heard was that Crytek was withdrawing their lawsuit, because it depended on the premise that Star Citizen and Squadron 42 would be released in a way that violated the contract with Crytek but since neither game has been released yet it is still too soon to sue. Roberts outmaneuvered everyone by never releasing a game.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:37
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Facebook Aunt posted:Seriously though, the latest lol I heard was that Crytek was withdrawing their lawsuit, because it depended on the premise that Star Citizen and Squadron 42 would be released in a way that violated the contract with Crytek but since neither game has been released yet it is still too soon to sue. Roberts outmaneuvered everyone by never releasing a game. His company has been reclassified as a charity, so yeah he's one masterful step ahead.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:47
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90s Cringe Rock posted:EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A COIN INTO MY WITCHER.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:50
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DandyLion posted:His company has been reclassified as a charity, so yeah he's one masterful step ahead. No, they said it was charitable to refer to it as a company.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:52
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DandyLion posted:His company has been reclassified as a charity, so yeah he's one masterful step ahead. what in the actual gently caress
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Jan 10, 2020 13:53
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DandyLion posted:His company has been reclassified as a charity, so yeah he's one masterful step ahead. Marcade posted:No, they said it was charitable to refer to it as a company.
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Jan 10, 2020 13:53
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Teriyaki Hairpiece posted:It was just something I checked once or twice a year to see if Star Citizen was done yet. Did they ever release it or is it still just a con?
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Jan 10, 2020 14:05
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gonna lie out my rear end on my resume, get a job, and coast by making my supervisors pay me per render provided
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Jan 10, 2020 21:12
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PHIZ KALIFA posted:gonna lie out my rear end on my resume, get a job, and coast by making my supervisors pay me per render provided gonna requote this from back in august. solid. Bushiz posted:I mean, depends on the trade. You can't start from absolute zero but six hours of watching youtubes on the subject will get you far enough to get in the door. SardonicTyrant posted:The Future Mrs. or Mr. SardonicTyrant?!!! Goon Danton posted:They actually married you before, they've just been out of the game for a while.
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Jan 10, 2020 21:48
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StashAugustine posted:Its like mashing up Cats and Springtime for Hitler Intel&Sebastian posted:He made the Jellicheil choice
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Jan 11, 2020 00:17
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oscarthewilde posted:if you sit on your left hand for a really long time and then jerk off, that's kinda like sex right? Alan Smithee posted:The right is getting better at the stranger and it’s making lefties nervous
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Jan 11, 2020 02:38
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A Fancy Hat's Trump speeches should all be compiled into a book
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Jan 11, 2020 03:32
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Ugly In The Morning posted:That whole story reminds me of the thing about nice guys just trying to put in kindness coins into the machine until sex falls out, except this time, the sex got stuck on the lid of one of those cup noodle things on the bottom row. Now there's a tremendous fat man rocking the machine back and forth screaming "WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME!"
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Jan 11, 2020 10:49
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lmao
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Jan 11, 2020 11:55
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Beachcomber posted:I knew about Len posted:This was super disappointing. I didn't have high hopes for Leninade but man was it a rough drink Don Gato posted:It's more fun to have the bottle as a decoration than to actually drink, I don't think I've met anyone who actually likes it. Moon Slayer posted:So it's great in theory but in actual practice turns into a nightmare? Marcade posted:And then you keep the corpse on display afterwards.
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Jan 12, 2020 02:15
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Did they change the bottle or something? My buddy gave me this one a couple years ago I think.
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Jan 12, 2020 02:54
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