The Puppy & Dog Owner Thread: Dog owning for dipshits

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Pet Island > The Puppy & Dog Owner Thread: Dog owning for dipshits

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wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Huskys and similar sled dogs are really trendy around here at the moment, I see a couple every day. Problem is, I live in the city and those dogs just cannot all live in a house with a backyard, it's impossible. People take dogs whose whole purpose is to run as long as they can into apartments and walk them maybe an hour tops daily, then wonder why their little darling destroys everything.

Dog people are idiots.

show us on the doll where the dog hurt you.

# ¿ Sep 8, 2015 20:43

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 02:37

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

No dog avatar; you're obviously not an expert.

your garbage dick av seems oddly appropriate

# ¿ Sep 8, 2015 20:45

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

seems to be working

if we can't convince idiots on the topic after years its probably proof that it doesn't because the "dominant" posters can't get poo poo posting dumbfucks to learn a god drat thing.

wtftastic fucked around with this message at 23:17 on Sep 14, 2015

# ¿ Sep 14, 2015 23:14

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Nostalgia4Dicks posted:

^ rewards/treats are fine but just to get the ball rolling and association going. I think I'm just bad at explaining things

So are Military/Police dogs mentally numb slaves or

naw you are probably just bad at dogs.

# ¿ Sep 15, 2015 00:25

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Superconsndar posted:

every day i pray to the gods for death to embrace me

which ones, i feel like I might be missing a few in my list.

# ¿ Sep 15, 2015 00:31

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Skizzles posted:

and she's helped run a conference for the past 3 years filled with several speakers with other (legit) behavior degrees

as in PhDs and poo poo

not "I got a cert through IACP "

well wait a minute you are telling me that I should trust an ACADEMIC???

*farts into own mouth*

# ¿ Sep 15, 2015 02:04

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Hey guys, I'm not getting a crate, period. It's not something we do here, never has been never will.

This can be fixed with training, no need for a crate or a pen (although I would def use a pen if it were an option right now).

Can we ban this person just from PI because they literally never loving listen or shut the gently caress up.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 17:51

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

LeftistMuslimObama posted:

^^You never really explained why you can't use a pen. Unless you're living in some sort of tinyhome, you should have room for a small pen.

The pen thing is primarily my problem along with constantly talking poo poo after either asking for advice or discussing problems you are having. Ex pens aren't illegal nor are loving baby gates, but all by all means bitch about how the advice and suggestions you get are terrible and we're all mean or whatever. You don't know poo poo and are consistently rude as hell.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:07

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Triangulum posted:

and those of us who also raised puppies in countries where crating is illegal gave you plenty of other ways to deal with your puppy destructive tendencies only to be met with "thats not an option"

if you cant do something as simple as keeping your dog from destroying your poo poo, maybe you shouldnt be handing out advice

"excuse me EX PENS are JUST NOT A POSSIBILITY", the foreign goon screamed while wading through rivers of destroyed items, "ALL OF THIS COST SO MUCH MONEY HOW CAN I KEEP THIS DOG FROM RUINING IT".

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:12

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

I don't really see why I'd need to explain why a particular solution isn't viable in my situation. I did end up getting a baby gate, though as I posted.

Also are you kidding me, I'm the rude one here? Do you actually read this goddamn thread at all? The people I was rude at were the ones who have been consistently doing nothing than making GBS threads up the thread or making fun of first time dog owners for being ignorant.

no i'm serious. telling someone who has lived in a country where crating is illegal (because apparently europeans can't loving figure out how to use crates in a way that doesn't encourage animal hoarding or puppy mills) that their alternative solutions d8dn't make sense while throwing a massive tanty was "wonderful". v. respectful.

i read this thread often enough to remember the other stupid poo poo you've come in here to bloviate on.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:14

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

you guys maybe missed this post, lol. It's been going really well!

But yeah, my problem was that my 1-year old dog, so not really a puppy one day decided to destroy a bunch of my stuff. He never did it before and hasn't now that I actually took advice from this thread and shut him in a room with nothing to destroy. How exactly am I being ignorant here?

i'm glad it only took you a giant melt down to loving figure out exactly what like 5 people suggested you do was reasonable

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:18

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

citybeatnik posted:

Truly, puppy ownership is serious business.

if you've seen some of the stupid poo poo we've seen over the last 4-5 years you'd feel the same way

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:20

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Actually only 1 suggested a baby gate, 1 a pen and the rest just said don't be an idiot crate your loving dog. Constructive advice there!

I guess you didn't figure out how not to be an idiot either.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:23

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

I re-read the conversation and def all the advice I was given was either get a pen or a crate. As soon as the baby gate thing was suggested I posted that i'd try it.

I don't really see how I've been in the wrong here, but w/e. I'll keep on posting in this thread and ignore all the trolling I guess.

yeah the regulars and people who actually know dick are just trolling. Is common sense illegal along with crating where ever the gently caress your from?

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:29

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Oh get off your high horse. If getting advice from you guys means you have to let all kinds of snarky comments slide then I wouldn't say you're very good at giving advice.

I'm sorry have you read most of this thread? People get plenty of good advice, but I guess because occasionally the tone isn't quite to your liking that means its wrong and bad. Do you realize how silly you sound? After all the poo poo you've said here? C'mon man.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:33

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Yeah and I guess you can't take it when someone posts back to you in a tone that's not quite to your liking. So people should get banned for being rude to a ~regular~user, lol.

I can take it just fine man, I'm on lunch break reading the forums. :unsmith:

And no, you just shouldn't be able to post here because your a dipshit who won't loving learn and shits up threads, not for being rude.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:38

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

Yeah and I clearly said that most of the options aren't viable in my situation. If I say I can't have a dog pen in my house, maybe using those critical thinking skills people could have to the conclusion that I have no room for one. I did say I won't crate because it's illegal here.

Seriously, go and read the discussion. It's only a few pages back.

do they not have bathrooms in europe where you could contain your sainted rescue?

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:46

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Mr. Wookums posted:

That would require a baby gate which was suggestion 8 rather than the previous 7 suggestions of containment that were not a crate.

That stupid Seattle dog who has lovely pacific northwest owners is what I remember best though.

im sorry you are right, how foolish of me.

Triangulum posted:

youre american yuo just wouldnt understand

im sorry my tiny american mind doesn't believe that anywhere else in this world exists

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:51

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Triangulum posted:

right and thats why i gave you suggestions on how to line your bathroom with pen panels to make sure he cant gently caress anything up

pen pannels are the same as crates which are radioactive

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 18:52

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

PartyCrown posted:

Take your dog to the vet and try an elimination diet in case it's something in her food.

This. Also seasonal allergies can be really bad some years and not bad others- I have an elderly (9 now) dog that occasionally has terrible allergies (goopy eyes, constant scratching, etc) and the transition from fall to summer seems to be the worst. If your dog seems really miserable, your vet may prescribe some steroids. You can also use some anti-histamines OTC for allergies in dogs safely (benedryl and claritin, for example), but IANAV and I suggest you talk to your vets.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 19:01

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

My dog has done well on Wellness and AvoDerm, and I would suggest taking a look at those as well or getting samples of them to try. I found my dog did better off of BB too.

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 19:33

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

LITERALLY A BIRD posted:

Nobody's getting banned. Also, if you don't like the posts you're reading, please take the time to press the Report button so that I can come review them in a timely manner. I try to catch up on all the threads every few days but life has been busy and this one was overlooked.

It seems like communications about why crates/pens/gates/etc won't work for you were lacking. You've since explained yourself and employed a baby gate so I think this discussion can be tabled for now.

Is there a way to report if you don't have plat?

also why

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 20:04

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Triangulum posted:

dont go to the dog park

problem solved

a-loving-men

# ¿ Oct 14, 2015 21:05

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Just feed your dog whatever, it'll be fine.

# ¿ Oct 15, 2015 13:12

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

I have no pit experience, so take this with a grain of salt, but it might be worth getting him used to being muzzled. You need to get a good muzzle, and you need to spend a lot of time making sure he thinks its the best thing in the world. The muzzle can help you create a safer situation if you get ambushed by a "friendly" dog or need to take him to the vets. Think of it as a safety device rather than a way to prevent anything, its just there to help keep you from catastrophe.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2016 00:09

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

AsYouWish posted:

Honestly I wouldn't reccomend this (ilu and im not snooting but ) A pit (and I'm sure many other DA dogs) can then go on to start a fight with its body language and have no way to back it up, which can turn into them hyping up their dog intolerance if/when they have a bad experience. Honestly the focus needs to be on the owner keeping the dog out of situations where a fight can happen, especially at first. That isn't to say that tolerating a muzzle isn't a good skill for all dogs to learn, just that it isn't really helpful when it comes to managing a DA dog and it could potentially lead to "worsening" their behavior under the right circumstances.

edit: ("worsening" is in quotes because it's helpful for pit owners to realize that their dogs aren't "bad." This is what they were bred for. You wouldn't be embarrassed and ashamed that your labrador was interested in retrieving; and you shouldnt be ashamed that your pit bull is dog aggressive. They're doing what we made them to do!)

That's fair enough, you know better than I do about this stuff. I had considered that too when writing this and thought I was anthropomorphizing them too much.

# ¿ Mar 12, 2016 00:42

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Vet time, ASAP.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2016 20:37

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

I'm letting my dog pee and poop in my house internet, why is it pooping in my house????

# ¿ Mar 31, 2016 01:12

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Real_Horrorshow posted:

Hello thread. Two weeks ago, I adopted Bella from a local shelter (my first dog), and have been trying to follow the advice in the OP is best as possible. I have lots of questions, one of them being proper etiquette around other dogs and their owners.

I was picking up Bella from her spay surgery today, and while the nurse was giving me care instructions, I accidentally let Bella wander over to sniff this bull terrier sitting in his owners lap. The guy blocks Bella, I apologize, and he says something like "control your dog, man". I feel terrible that I potentially put Bella in danger, but I guess I thought that kind of behavior was just expected in a small space with several dogs. If this owner is worried about his dogs behavior, shouldn't he have crated him?

In a more general sense, how should I handle future interactions with other dogs? Obviously asking the owner is a first step, but what if another dog approaches Bella? How can you tell when a dog might be aggressive, or whether it's just saying hello? Do I have to be worried that every dog we meet is potentially aggressive?

Keep you dog under control in public. Its not rocket science. Not everyone wants your spastic out of control dog up in their face or in their dog's face, and yes you should assume all dogs are dog aggressive if it stops you letting your dog wander around and greet whoever it wants.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2016 17:23

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Kluliss posted:

That's fair enough - like I say I have cut her food down and am going to get her the good food she had before as soon as I've been paid (she was in better condition with it and less farty, just sucks when money dries up and I can't afford to get her usual food because it's twice as much as the next half-decent stuff :/) and yeah, you have great / energetic dogs Fraction, I have a lazy shitbarrel but yes, she could be thinner as after looking at pictures of 'ideal' weight dogs I can see that she does have more fat than she needs, so I will continue adjusting her food until she's looking better. I may record the screaming banshee she'll become because she'll be perpetually hungry and find a way of making it repeat at full volume through some goon speakers though :P

Honestly though, if it was said in a 'do you mind if we discuss your dog's weight' way, I'd have gone 'sure, does she look fat?' and tried harder to find a better picture of her. I am not unreasonable unless people don't bother with common courtesy, I'm British, don't you know...

And yes, looking at pictures of 'ideal' weight dogs I can see that she does have more fat than she needs, so I will continue adjusting her food until she's looking better. I may record the screaming banshee she'll become because she'll be perpetually hungry and find a way of making it repeat at full volume through all goon speakers though :P

Guess I'd better stock up on the industrial earplugs again >.<

Do you mind if I tell you your dog is fat, lumpy, and that if you don't want to hear it you can crawl into any other fur mom forum on the internet and piss off?

# ¿ Jun 14, 2016 02:44

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

pookel posted:

I don't particularly care about hand holding, but it's really loving weird how PI likes to latch onto a couple of random pieces of info and then start "answering" questions the poster never even asked while ignoring the questions they actually do ask.

there's this concept of context that tends to be pretty valuable.

# ¿ Jun 15, 2016 01:55

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

you're doing such a great job at taking a break

i just don't get it. people come here asking questions. sometimes they're stupid or ignorant or w/e but who's honestly forcing you to be some kind of a resident rear end in a top hat expert? no one. stop reading the puppy & dog owner megathread if new dog owners get on your nerves. everyone's a newbie at some point and you're not doing people any favours posting the way you do

The goal is to have people learn something eventually, but I see why you might be confused.

# ¿ Jun 15, 2016 14:11

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Dyna Soar posted:

yeah, and for example most of the music forum megathreads are pretty chill.

eh, this is going nowhere. be dicks as much as you want, it's just making you seem very juvenile.

Thanks for your permission some dude who showed up from screaming from a sauna about crates

# ¿ Jun 15, 2016 15:21

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

Verman posted:

I agree.

Another reason why I'm uneasy is seeing people bring their small children to the dog park. Personally it seems like a recipe for disaster but then again I don't have kids so it's easy for me to say "don't bring your kids here".

No, its a generally sound policy. Its a dog park. Parks are for people and kids, dog parks are for....dogs. I've actually had to ask children to leave me and my dog alone when we're in dog parks. I've also had to have to tell children to not chase me when I walk my dog, to not pull his tail, to not KNOCK ON MY DOOR to ask to pet my dog (!!!!) etc. Pets and kids are a weird mix.

# ¿ Jun 16, 2016 20:53

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

TBeats posted:

If a dog destroys my house and I don't at the very least get money to cover everything plus a few bucks it would probably lead me to a falling out with family anyway. And even then I would probably still be pretty pissed at whoever dropped the dog in my lap like that.

Shut the gently caress up, your advice is terrible, stop trying to steal your neighbors dog.

# ¿ Aug 7, 2016 05:25

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# ¿ May 15, 2024 02:37

wtftastic: Jul 24, 2006; "In private, we will be mercifully free from the opinions of imbeciles and fools."

FogHelmut posted:

Cool I'll go back to giving my dog treats when she's sitting there doing nothing (positive reinforcement) and ignoring her when she's running around with a corn cob in her mouth (passive corrections) and forget about the one time I made her feel shame for biting my finger.

Let's run down the full list of commands she regularly obeys but chose the corncob over:

"Drop it."
*nope I got a corn cob*
"Come here"
*runs over, look at my corncob it's good*
"Drop it and I'll give you this treat."
*nah I'll keep the corn cob*
"Give me the corncob." as I place my hand on it
*growls*
"Don't you growl at me." (This is where I'm about to get bit, which I ignored because she's never growled once in her life.)
"I'll just pull this corncob from your mouth."
*lets go of the corncob and nips my finger*
"Get ahold of yourself you're hysterical." (This is where I put her on her back and asked her to calm down and feel shame for biting me)
*dog follows me back to the table where I sit and she sits down next to me*

Pet Island interpretation:
*dog is happily eating a potential bowel obstruction and should be praised*
*owner takes her to the rape stand and begins interrogations with waterboarding and improvised lamp cord electric shocks*

Please excuse my late night angrypost. As-salamu alaykum

what really happened is that people are sick of you being terrible at doing any kind of training with your dog and then screaming about it as if you know gently caress all. dogs don't feel shame and the fact that you don't have the awareness to even be like "maybe I shouldn't tell the people telling me my head is so far up my own rear end I can see daylight again" idk man.

have fun screaming at a toddler in two years i guess

# ¿ Aug 28, 2016 21:31

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Pet Island > The Puppy & Dog Owner Thread: Dog owning for dipshits

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