/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Haifisch posted:

My [15 F] mom [37 F] is mad because I burned my journal and paintings after I caught her snooping.

This girl owns.

# ¿ Jun 27, 2018 01:18

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 13:11

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

I have to admire the sheer stubborness.

# ¿ Jun 28, 2018 03:11

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Cowslips Warren posted:

I will never forget my first nanny job, where one of the mothers asked me how I would punish their daughter if she acted out.

Daughter being six months old.

I remember sitting there, staring at her, and slowly saying, "She's half a year old, what is she going to do where she'd be punished?"

Apparently some of the other applicants had ranged from swatting the hand to yelling to a swift slap on the butt.

For six months old.

wh...what did she say in reply?

# ¿ Jun 29, 2018 05:51

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Ouhei posted:

What shoes could she possibly be wearing that he argues with her about them? Is this guy a quaker or some poo poo and she's showing ankle? They're loving shoes.

You would be surprised at how much poo poo parents can find to criticize. My mother once called my 13 year old cousin "a hussy" for wearing "inappropriate clothes." The clothes in question were a pair of blue jeans, a hoodie, and Ugg boots because it was winter and it was cold. My mother's objection was "the clothes show off how skinny she is."

# ¿ Jun 29, 2018 22:55

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Jeza posted:

Maybe she just can't comprehend that for most people, life is not a carefully orchestrated plan that must be written out in advance with diagrams. To be honest the story has the whiff of bullshit to me anyway because of the way she denigrates him throughout as if he's literally Forrest Gump in a way that is difficult to credit. Did he actually join the military because Humvees are cool or was that a joke and she's a humourless automaton? Did he really go to job fairs for the "free food", or was that just a joke and he was, you know, going to job fairs to look for a job maybe??

She's the robot hammering the NO FUN ALLOWED sign into the front lawn

# ¿ Jul 3, 2018 22:48

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Crimpolioni posted:

trying to imagine situations where its justified to stab someone but shooting them is unconsionable, and so far what i have doing surgery and during a fencing match

what if he tries to grab my butt during a fencing match

# ¿ Jul 5, 2018 21:08

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

welcome to hell posted:

See if you can guess the ending from the title.

Michigan: Do you need the mother's consent for a paternity test? I want to get one but I do not think my girlfriend will let me.

UPDATE: Michigan: Do you need the mother's consent for a paternity test? I want to get one but I do not think my girlfriend will let me. Did the test. He is my son.

Kick him to the loving curb

# ¿ Jul 8, 2018 09:41

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Total Meatlove posted:

I don�t think you understand what a World Cup final will mean for the countries playing in it and the fianc�e needs to get on board quickly.

Isn't England still in the semis?

# ¿ Jul 9, 2018 06:01

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Serephina posted:

Yuss! I'm the first to post this:

My [25F] downstairs neighbor [33M] brings me dinner every night Non-Romantic

Top rated comments:

Eyebleach for the day, you're welcome.

# ¿ Jul 13, 2018 00:17

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

oh good now we can get into some idiot table manners derail

r/relationshipsRelationships
My (F30) husband (M35) of 10 yrs is having secret conversations with other women.

quote:

My husband has this habit. Its nasty and insidious but basically he befriends other women, and eventually he starts to have secret conversations with them, begins hiding their interactions. These get more flirty and eventually the other woman thinks my husband is interested. At this point he doesn't cut off communication, he instead insists that was never his intention and then continues to talk to them for months. This has happened multiple times, and often doesn't end without me begging him to stop, usually over the course of months.

This finally came to a head when he did it with a friend of mine, and instead of begging him I called my brother and told him that my husband was setting up another affair, he has kicked me out and told me he wants a divorce. All while maintaining there is nothing going on. Honestly he seems more upset that I told my brother instead of begging him to stop like I normally do.

I will admit that I have been paranoid due to the way that he talks to my friend. We had been fighting about the way he flirts with her. It came to a head after he came home from work and was talking with me (arguing about whether he prioritised me or other women) and his phone alerted him to a "secret conversation" on messenger. He looked at it and lied said it was one of his male friends. I said it wasn't it was probably F28. He "proved" me wrong by opening a message from her asking him to comfort her.

This is how I found out that all my paranoia was correct. He was continuing with the previous pattern of moving this girl into hidden communication.

He then defended the fact it was hidden by saying he had to hide it because I was a "monster" who "did not trust him" or want him to have "any friends". And it all clicked. He wasn't just flirting with her, he was actively hiding what they were talking about. His reasoning was that she asked him because her spouse goes through her phone and they were talking finances.

He has spent days making me feel like I'm crazy, that I am a hyper-paranoid crazy lady who this was all in my head. He has accused me of playing mind games and that because he never intended to gently caress her that I am being unreasonable.

I told him I didn't want to be married to someone who didn't put my feelings first. He responded that he always puts my feelings first and that he isnt allowed to speak with women. Which isnt true, he always moves it into this not quite cheating realm. I have no objection to him having female friends - I object to what follows when he finds them attractive. The secretive stuff never happens with women who he doesn't find attractive.

Basically TLDR am I a crazy jealous woman because my husband hides communication with women?

Edit: had to repost because I used a bad word. Thanks to all who commented before.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2018 18:05

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

HOT BREAD! posted:

Here�s another moron that was posted in the comments of that engagement ring story:

He doubles down in the comments too

�hurrrrr why my woman not like my choice of ring and proposal, my coworkers and male BFF think it�s great �

His username is accurate

# ¿ Jul 18, 2018 19:04

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

I don't want to see pictures of naked children, if that makes me a psycho Puritan that hates humanity or something than I am at peace with it. Don't flash around naked pictures of children.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2018 22:05

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

College brands are such cancer

# ¿ Jul 19, 2018 21:36

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Play posted:

Seriously I know it's popular to bag on America but in this case WHAT THE gently caress IS GOOD ABOUT SENDING A STRAIGHT UP DICK SHOT OF YOUR SON TO SOMEONE YOU JUST MET?

You guys read the story wrong too, it wasn't saying the child was naked below the waist, it was saying the child was naked, and the PICTURE was below the waist. So there wasn't anything in the picture except little boy dick and legs. No one wants or needs to see that and if you go sending stuff around like that willy nilly you'll pay the price no matter what country you're in. And yes there are naked children at the beach all the time here, it's not even close to the same thing to sending a complete stranger a close up of your son's dick.

but you see it's of the utmost importance that complete strangers be 100% fine with seeing naked child pictures and if you're not then you're just a repressed Puritan. Because you don't like seeing naked child pictures. It makes you a Puritan if you don't like seeing naked child pictures. That's the argument.

:suicide:

# ¿ Jul 20, 2018 01:35

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

My [24M] Girlfriend [23F] has the weirdest hobbies in existence, and they make me kinda uncomfortable.

this dude is the biggest weenie alive, also I wanna date that girl she sounds really awesome

this guy needs to dump his girlfriend so I can date her and cherish her and love her

# ¿ Jul 20, 2018 21:23

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

LadyPictureShow posted:

Should I (F21) tell my Fianc� (M25) that I've gotten rid of his books he lied about?

R/relationships: �They�re my Waifu books�

this is a nightmare made flesh

# ¿ Jul 23, 2018 22:34

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

I feel like this all ties into what thread goers have said previously about romantic comedies ruining relationships. escapism has its limits.

# ¿ Jul 24, 2018 01:22

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Incoherence posted:

This is not r/relationships, but it is a relationship trainwreck:
http://twitter.com/cduffy90/status/1022858236284821504

is this one of those nerd weddings where everyone dresses up in a costume?

# ¿ Jul 28, 2018 00:55

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

HoAssHo posted:

It's probably this kind of thing: https://bellabridesmaids.com/bella-inspiration/bridesmaids-buzz/jump-on-the-jumpsuit-trend/

what on earth

# ¿ Jul 28, 2018 01:05

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Admiral Ray posted:

Breezy overalls.

all they have to do is spread their wings and a stiff breeze will carry them up into the sky

# ¿ Jul 28, 2018 01:10

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Milotic posted:

I (29m) have trouble showing my daughter, (11F) affection.

Oh ok that�s bad but not unfixable

Wow. Wow. Wow wee wow.

What is this dude's problem. Oh my god. Good chance his daughter already knows he doesn't love her at all, too. Nice job loving that up rear end in a top hat.

# ¿ Aug 1, 2018 18:42

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

gently caress Your Website posted:

Parents clearly found out kid registered an account on comedy website something awful dot com and did the needful

cruel...but fair

# ¿ Aug 7, 2018 19:21

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

ArbitraryC posted:

Everything else aside as it is a p funny story, I feel like it's weird they couldn't have a regular thanksgiving. Plenty of not fat people splurge on stuff a couple times a year, seems like a dumb thing to tank a holiday over.

being healthy means all tofu all the time only fat people eat animal products

# ¿ Aug 9, 2018 21:46

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Total Meatlove posted:

They might write a column in a newspaper though

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/aug/11/devastated-by-my-sons-tattoo#comments

"oh my god my child is a separate person from me that is living a fulfilling life on their own without my guidance, i've successfully done my job as a parent and i'm devastated"

do they let any crank write editorials these days?

# ¿ Aug 11, 2018 08:06

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Total Meatlove posted:

That story was from 2012 and still regularly resurfaces, the Guardian played a blinder.

The Guardian has played a good game indeed in getting those clicks :pipe:

# ¿ Aug 11, 2018 08:33

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Hahahah remember that episode of the office where Michael has them do Yankee Swap because he hates the lovely oven mitt he got and wants to get rid of it and everyone gets their feelings hurt and he has to make it up to them by buying like 10 handles of vodka

# ¿ Aug 17, 2018 19:41

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Leon Einstein posted:

I think it's more that he couldn't wait to get all these sick burns on her and her family that makes it seem a little fictitious.

Lol I checked out the reddit comments and even they're calling it fake

# ¿ Aug 24, 2018 21:51

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

cumshitter posted:

Based on how involved the families are, it reads like the OP's family are a bunch of peanut butter magnates and his fiance's family runs a jelly empire and this marriage absolutely must happen for business reasons. That, and the giant backyard of intrigue with multiple plot exposition benches that are easily obscured from each other.

Upper Crustless: a new hit drama available to all Amazon Prime subscribers this Fall.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2018 21:58

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

La Brea Carpet posted:

[Colorado] Guy threatening my family to my mother

the reverse Norman Bates

# ¿ Sep 3, 2018 04:25

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Straight White Shark posted:

: the movie, in three acts

My brother hacked into everything and is trying to control my life. [CA]

[Update] My brother hacked into everything and is trying to control my life. [CA]

[Update] [Update] My brother hacked into everything and is trying to control my life. [CA]

loving awful but at least when the OP recovers from this they won�t have these people as family.

# ¿ Sep 9, 2018 00:04

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

What was that story from way back from the woman who got pregnant and when she told her fiance he flipped out and accused her of cheating because he was supposed to be sterile? And then when they did the paternity test it turned out he was the father and that he burned his bridges with her over nothing? I wanna read that again.

# ¿ Sep 10, 2018 22:33

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

LadyPictureShow posted:

This one?
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/4ajmbs/me_27_f_with_my_ex_fiance_29_m_of_5_years_he_is/

Me [27 F] with my ex fiance [29 M] of 5 years, he is the father, wants our relationship back but I don't know...

Yesssssss thank you

# ¿ Sep 10, 2018 23:37

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Have you been watching The Battle of Algiers or something?

I(36f) mentioned the possibility of a threesome to my boyfriend(36m) and now he's uncomfortable with me and our relationship

Polyamory claims another relationship.

Why on earth would you actually voice this to your SO, my god.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2018 05:00

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

lol but seriously I posted:

zarhkov politely asks the party guests to at least not walk the big shits they've taken all over the floor into the carpet and is completely ignored, a sane and reasonable man in a time and place that was not for him

never underestimate the ability of goons to :goonsay:

# ¿ Sep 15, 2018 03:23

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Moon Atari posted:

I regret starting the sales derail.

guess you could say you sold them on the argument

# ¿ Sep 28, 2018 19:45

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Patrick Spens posted:

There is a dilemma between my (52F) daughter (22F) and my husband (58M)

Mother of the year right here I tell you what.

Good for Lucy and hopefully she�ll never have to deal with this witch again.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2018 22:21

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Goons, the original Internet Tough Guys

# ¿ Oct 8, 2018 22:58

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Straight White Shark posted:

I [23 f] got really drunk and said some stuff that shocked my boyfriend. [30m]

tfw you realize the younger woman you were hoping to control can and will take your loving head off

These stories where the boyfriends are frightened of their girlfriends is simultaneously sad and hilarious.

"my life loving sucks my girlfriend is a badass how can this get any wooooooorse"

# ¿ Nov 20, 2018 07:52

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Haifisch posted:

My[23F] roommate[21F] smashed my family Christmas ornaments

kill the roommate Halloween style

# ¿ Dec 3, 2018 09:29

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# ¿ May 14, 2024 13:11

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

LadyPictureShow posted:

My [41F] son [17M] walked in on me and his father [42M] engaging in a threesome with a family friend [45M]. He has been a different person towards us since.

dear god what is the link for this

# ¿ Dec 3, 2018 09:51

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