/r/Incels: Japan is far ahead of us in incel science

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/Incels: Japan is far ahead of us in incel science

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burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

If only we could teach the snake to eat itself out.

# ¿ Jul 18, 2017 06:58

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 19:00

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

/r/incels: denying this is denial.

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 15:35

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Barudak posted:

I hate this thread because now i think of plain crunchy taco tortillas with no filling as prepubescent tacos.

Doesn't everyone? How did you think of them before?

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 15:48

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

More relevant is the somewhat obvious possibility that if these professionals are bailing on him specifically (they probably aren't) it's far more likely they're doing so because he's creepy rather than ugly. I wouldn't work back magic on somebody who was paying me to touch them for the sole purpose of getting around the trouble of nobody being willing to do it for free.

# ¿ Aug 24, 2017 18:06

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I think in this case "framecel" is just a descriptor of a body type this loser figures ought to disqualify the dude from sex. A normal person would just say "oh, he has a slight frame."

I like the above guess better though. GOT THE WRONG ~~GLASSES~~SPECTACLES IDIOT.

# ¿ Aug 26, 2017 20:12

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

But I would LOVE it if people were randomly telling me how super hot I am every day all day. The only reason I can think of why you wouldn't appreciate being reduced to an attractiveness number by total strangers is if maybe you were super ugly.

IS THAT IT? ARE YOU SUPER UGLY?

Also, please note that this is a joke and in no way indicative how I actually feel. Like, at all. There are people who would use this line of reasoning in earnest though. I've met a few.

burial fucked around with this message at 04:01 on Sep 2, 2017

# ¿ Sep 2, 2017 03:54

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

doverhog posted:

This would've been an ok post if you didn't feel the need to double back and explain the joke. It's really unattractive and shows a crippling lack of confidence... Probably super ugly.

Oh, obviously. How was this even up for debate? The self-doubt is hobbling at best and still probably my most desirable trait.

# ¿ Sep 2, 2017 05:54

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Pick posted:

give 16 year old girls Purge authority

Doesn't this just put 15 year old girls in unnecessary danger?

# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 08:06

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Pick posted:

true, those 18 and under should be exempted. no purging minors, even by other minors, even if slenderman tells you to.

I was getting at the idea that these dudes would just drop a year to avoid the agency issue, but that's a fair response too. And it was a necessary clarification to make anyway, I think.

# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 08:16

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Pick posted:

right. because women. who are stupid, but also evil, and psychic

Wish it to the cornfield, ladies. Please, wish it to the cornfield.

# ¿ Sep 6, 2017 15:47

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I wonder if anyone's ever been (identical) twincel. Like, their sibling has the same wrist-width, clavicles, dick, whatever and has no difficulty finding relationships/having sex with attractive people by virtue of their personality, leaving the other one with nothing physical to point to as the root cause of his inability to do the same.

It would have to be maddening for one of these guys.

# ¿ Sep 9, 2017 07:21

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

china bot posted:

That's the weirdest representation of Jesus I've seen in a long time.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2017 17:51

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

What about, like, "FREE BLOWJOB FROM A SUBMISSIVE 10/10 (insert creepily young age here) VIRGIN DESPERATE TO BE IMPRINTED BY SOMEBODY WAY SMARTER THAN NORMAL PEOPLE AND DEFINITELY SMARTER THAN SHE IS" and inside there's a hole but really it's a tiny dick guillotine?

Nobody has to die.

e: I mean, they maybe should, but nobody has to.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2017 18:55

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

MY PALE GOTH SKIN posted:

I was trying to stick with "suicide" and not "murder" or "assault"

drat it. You're right. Although semi-coercing somebody into suicide by providing means coupled with disappointment is arguably not all that much more noble.

I rarely murder or assault people. It's just that I saw an episode of Coupling recently with a miniature dick guillotine and I was looking for a reason to justify the existence of such a device.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2017 19:04

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Pick posted:

I like girls that gently caress catbercrombie & fitch?

I am always down for a mew and horrifying take on a '90s song.

# ¿ Sep 17, 2017 07:01

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

My Linux Rig posted:

That sounds like an online thing to me at least. I have literally met zero fat people who think like that

Which I guess would explain the incel bitching about it like it's a real thing sweeping the nation

I went back to university last year (at 32, yay) to finish my relatively useless degree and took a communication/media class to meet some stupid requirement. It was there that I first encountered people who say and believe these things in real life.

The main girl, who was quite heavy, made "fat activism" (her term) the theme of every presentation and paper she did that semester. It was like the internet came to life and started punching me in the face.

The details aren't interesting enough to go into but these people DO exist. And there were quite a few others that applauded and agreed with her, so. :shrug:

I just kept my mouth shut as I don't like hurting people's feelings and also the rest of the class probably would have turned on me pretty quickly.

# ¿ Sep 21, 2017 18:09

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

timefly posted:

I used to hate "baby" too until someone I actually love started calling me that

I'd say that's gotta be a factor. "Hey baby, you're hot. Wanna come back to my place?" and "You feeling okay, baby? I can make you some of that soup you like" are worlds apart.

Then again, I'm a dude so I maybe don't get to have an opinion on this.

Then AGAIN again, my wife calls me "baby" sometimes so I maybe do? HA.

# ¿ Sep 25, 2017 03:20

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I like how if you blackpill hard enough? you win a crucifixion.

# ¿ Sep 27, 2017 07:50

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

jizzy sillage posted:

I think that's a cross for a grave marker. Suicide by inceldom.

I like my way better. :colbert:

# ¿ Sep 27, 2017 18:41

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

KillerJunglist posted:

You'll have a hell of a time trying to get that third nail in.

These guys seem pretty convinced they'd be happy to manage one.

# ¿ Sep 27, 2017 19:49

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Is bag-over-head guy some kind of weird incel thing or? because there were some other comics earlier in the thread with what I thought was the same character. Maybe this is a parody of that?

# ¿ Sep 28, 2017 06:59

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I just assumed the fourth girl down was a zombie. Why else would she have blood all over her mouth?

# ¿ Sep 28, 2017 20:45

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Tetracube posted:

has this been posted yet

�there are anti-incel subreddits? Weeee.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2017 00:24

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

lazorexplosion posted:

BRUTAL BLACKPILL: More femoids have sex with fruit and veg than incels. YOU ARE LESS DESIRABLE THAN A CUCUMBER

If that cuke has been turned into a Vlasic Original Dill Pickle, I am okay with this. Not psyched, obviously, but okay.

Some people (and Vlasic Original Dill Pickles) will always be better than me. Oh noooo. I will continue to shower regularly.

# ¿ Oct 5, 2017 08:01

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

My microwave is super loyal. What we have is REAL.

# ¿ Oct 12, 2017 19:42

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Khazar-khum posted:

I've seen 'desicel'. What's 'desi'?

Brother Entropy posted:

noun
1.
a person of Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi birth or descent who lives abroad.

Crap. I was hoping it meant you couldn�t get laid because Lucy is always trying to be in your shows.

e: By the logic covered earlier re:�gymcel� this should maybe mean you can�t get laid because you consistently have some explaining to do.

burial fucked around with this message at 07:13 on Oct 17, 2017

# ¿ Oct 17, 2017 07:07

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

One time, on some forums, there was this guy with, like, all these fruits on his butt. I can�t help but wonder what his deal was.

# ¿ Oct 18, 2017 07:04

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Tell me of the ejaculates of your homeworld, PUAsul.

vvvv
�wormsign� is now and forever entering my vocabulary in this way. You�re great. That�s loving great.

Also, I sometimes call vaginas �banders� but it never caught on. That has nothing to do with Dune though.

burial fucked around with this message at 09:13 on Oct 18, 2017

# ¿ Oct 18, 2017 09:09

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Wait, are Dune Stacies �Chani� or?

# ¿ Oct 18, 2017 09:17

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Liquid Communism posted:

They fantasize about being attractive enough to be the one turning down desperate women.

This bit seems normal enough. It�s just, yet again, one of those things some/most? people (or at least averagely adjusted ones) seem to outgrow well before they hit adulthood.

Personally, I figured out I wouldn�t deal well with all THAT much attention even before I�d really dreamt about what it would be like. This worked out fine, given that you�ve gotta be a REAL odd person to like what I bring to the table.

# ¿ Oct 20, 2017 07:11

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

If they�re going to put �normie� on the chart, that whole section should have been expanded to include chad an various forms of cuck.

Either that or it should have said NOT AN INCEL instead at that branch.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 08:33

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I�d have thought certain flavours of protestantism would be way more in line with this type of thinking. At least catholics can actually be absolved of things in a structural way.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2017 19:51

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Calvinism is a perfect fit. After all, whether or not you�ll get laid [by a �hot� girl] IS clearly set in stone at birth, regardless of life choices.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2017 20:00

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I suspect very few incels actually want to die. And that�s not just because it would require something of them.

# ¿ Oct 29, 2017 07:56

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Take the plunge! Okay! posted:

I was just reading in the 600 lbs thread about a man who was so fat he got fused to his chair and was covered in feces and maggots. And he had a girlfriend. My first reaction was to think of the incels and chuckle

What the. Also I didn�t know there was a thread for that. My wife would love it? but I doubt even that would get her to look at these forums for herself. She�s wise that way.

# ¿ Oct 31, 2017 09:24

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

fruit on the bottom posted:

I�m prepared to believe this happened more-or-less as described, apart from the bit where he fails to mention that he was ALSO being a total rear end in a top hat.

Then again, if these events really took place, wouldn�t a link have been provided? If he�s proud of his �victory� he�d want to showcase that poo poo.

# ¿ Nov 5, 2017 03:51

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Pththya-lyi posted:

I've said it before, I'll say it again: men in general go by what they like in a man when trying to figure out what women want.

"Women really like giant muscles and sports cars and aggression, right?"

Is that really what most straight men would guess they�d like. Maybe I�m just learning I�m odd in a new way.

# ¿ Nov 5, 2017 05:33

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Improbable Lobster posted:

Seems like a lot of straight dudes seem to think that way they want to look like is the same as what women would want them to look like. I dunno, I'm bi and just kinda want to lose some weight.

Okay, that narrows it and is very helpful, although it doesn�t really fix my confusion. I�m heterosexual but I�ve never wanted to look all musclebound or �swole� or whatever. I always aspired to (and achieved, in my younger days) the wiry side of lanky and unkempt in a good way.

I guess what I�m saying is I�ve never really thought the hollywood ideal of the action hero was actually drawn from a real-life common male ideal.

# ¿ Nov 5, 2017 06:21

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

Improbable Lobster posted:

Might be the reverse. Hollywood musclebound power fantasies leading to dudes fantasizing about being beefackes.

Where did it start? hollywood-wise, I mean. There�s probably a fairly interesting book about this.

# ¿ Nov 5, 2017 07:35

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# ¿ Apr 29, 2024 19:00

burial: Sep 13, 2002; actually, that won't be necessary.

I walk around pretty okay most days, but I�m a mobilitynormie at best.

e: Nevermind. I keep forgetting two of my kids aren�t biological. Mobilitycuck it is, I guess.

# ¿ Nov 6, 2017 10:22

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/Incels: Japan is far ahead of us in incel science

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