UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo - The Something Awful Forums

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo

Who is your first pick in the deputy leadership race? This poll is closed.
R. Allin-Khan	6	1.60%
R. Burgon	80	21.33%
D. Butler	72	19.20%
A. Rayner	35	9.33%
I. Murray	5	1.33%
P. Flaps	177	47.20%
Total:	375 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

learnincurve posted:

Hardware stores are on the will be open list. You might find all the staff go gently caress that and don�t turn up though

All B&Q stores will be shut tomorrow (24th) to ensure they can provide only essential items going forward:

https://www.diy.com/customer-support/#icamp=HP_Hero_customersupport

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 00:25

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# ¿ May 11, 2024 18:43

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

xtothez posted:

Arch-twats Mike Ashley and Tim Martin are having a competition tonight to see who gets the guillotine first. The bloated avarice elemental is arguing that sports equipment is essential now that more people can exercise. He should therefore be able to keep all his shops open for the good of the public.

Meanwhile Father Jack's uglier brother has decreed that Wetherspoons 37k+ staff won't receive any further pay effective as of the 22nd. Any due bonuses are on hold and they're not paying out anything under the 80% scheme until they recieve the cash from the government. Which is likely weeks away.

Absolute twats, both of them

I've boycotted Wetherspoons ever since the prick campaigned so loudly and irritatingly for Brexit and as for Sports Direct, I last used them well over a decade ago.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 01:48

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jel Shaker posted:

Just woke up from nights, has something happened

Boris said you're grounded for 3 weeks

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 07:38

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Londoners are truly hosed, it seems.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 09:12

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxmbTp_74LRmpQu5IanvLBQ/videos

uh how the gently caress are any of these knives legal?

edit - they're not, they're from 2016 when they technically were "legal" to carry

# ¿ Mar 24, 2020 23:59

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

baka kaba posted:

turns out all the british stereotypes are true, and our mad max future is gonna be that nathan barley tiny bikes scene only with people pointing mini crossbows at each other and going OI!!

I'm gonna rouse Colin Furze from his Corona-proof chamber

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 00:08

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Not sure if this is allowed but a friend who works in the NHS posted this on my Facebook. If it's not okay mods feel free to delete:

This app has just been launched today with researchers at Guy’s & St Thomas’ & King’s college to help slow the spread of #COVID19 and identify at risk cases sooner by self-reporting your symptoms daily, even if you feel well 🙏🏼. Download the app
https://covid.joinzoe.com/

Please share the app with everyone you know on WhatsApp via a broadcast. They need to get this to a lot of people fast to collect enough data to see the hidden cases - the iceberg if you like that we are sailing into. Thank you! App is fully functional and will be more beautiful over the next few days!

Share the app and share your “well/ill” status and let’s get some data for the policy makers to work with.

Initial feedback of the site’s inability to register children’s symptoms have been forwarded to the investigators. Anything further you can add / feedback will all help to capture what’s going on in the community vs just what we’re capturing in tertiary care. It all helps. Thank you so much.

# ¿ Mar 25, 2020 13:19

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

OzyMandrill posted:

Ben & Holly is also god-tier.
Nanny Plum, redbeard the pirate, the aliens from planet bong, if you have no idea what I'm on about, you have missed out.

Jelly flood!

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 16:53

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Uh...where's Boris?

He doesn't have Coronavirus does he?

# ¿ Mar 26, 2020 18:19

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

loving lol

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 12:33

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Wizard Master posted:

People celebrating this are low key p. gross, just saying

Oh hey look at the guy who voted tory

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 13:06

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Mega Comrade posted:

I'm not denying the state we are in is his fault but I don't believe that's how it would be remembered in history by the majority of the public if he died. Half the papers are already trying to sell him as the reincarnation of Churchill.

After Cameron there was May, after May there was Johnson and after him there will be some equally poo poo politician to take his place.

R BORIS

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 13:26

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

OwlFancier posted:

I was thinking back to that post and yeah, this poster deserves a medal and also they should post the lottery numbers for this week please.

Okay Corona..you got the silver medal.

Now go for the Gold!

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 14:12

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jose posted:

just found out i'm on an initial 3 weeks off work with full pay

Get ready to masturbate like you've never masturbated before

# ¿ Mar 27, 2020 17:08

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

hemale in pain posted:

Check the gluten free section. There's always been rice flour so far.

That's a bit of a dickish thing to do if you don't have a gluten allergy.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 08:51

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

hemale in pain posted:

i do sorta! in that i think i have IBS and i seem to get gassy as gently caress and get stomach cramps if i eat too much gluten or onions. or maybe i'm imagining it.

I have the exact same condition as you, I just try not to eat bread. Or deal with the consequences if I do, haha

Also chinese takeaways tend to have the same effect on me, and McDonald's burgers.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 09:07

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Nettle Soup posted:

Giving up garlic and onions was probably the best thing I ever did for my ibs, I do miss garlic bread though...

Onions don't bother me, it's just bread and chinese food and sometimes Pizza. I've tried Pizza Hut's gluten free bases and i'm fine with them but they don't exactly taste great.

Hell, a lot of store bought gluten free stuff tastes awful and is nearly twice the price, but i'm too drat lazy to make my own so I just adjust my diet or get on with it.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 09:31

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Soylent Yellow posted:

I think I read last week somewhere that the plan was to distribute the majority of them through Boots and other pharmacies. If so, expect to see the majority on ebay or amazon for a grand each.

Good luck getting one from Boots, you can't even access the website right now

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 09:32

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jose posted:

My take away from this is that southerners are monsters because there is an orderly queue outside the boots near me same as Tesco and I haven't seen any fighting at any shop

Aye, same in Middlesbrough. My wife queued outside Tesco for nearly an hour and said there wasn't a single problem.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 09:57

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jaeluni Asjil posted:

Screaming at the tv - why is Johnson asking Trump for help with ventilators when he rejected the EU help with ventilators? Grrrr.

Oh come on now, think about it. It's not that hard.

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 10:25

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Oh hey Wuhan is open again

# ¿ Mar 28, 2020 12:37

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Danger - Octopus! posted:

Friend lives next door to a Tory MP and his wife, who are supposedly self-isolating. Last night the MP had family visitors who drove over, spent a few hours having dinner and hanging out with them and then left because of course government guidance on a pandemic can be ignored if you're a smug Tory.

Burn all these people in an incinerator

# ¿ Mar 29, 2020 06:45

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jippa posted:

Clocks going forward always tricks me.

I set two alarms to make sure I wouldn't be late for work this morning.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2020 07:38

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

XMNN posted:

what's the point of this letter anyway? have toilet paper shortages got that bad already?

I already read it and the headline of "this will get worse before it gets better" is the entirety of the message about how much worse it's going to get, there is no "levelling" about the likely length of the intervention and no indication of the sort of consequences we should be bracing ourselves for

also it says the government has one simple rule, "you must stay home" and then goes on to repeat the list of exceptions to that one simple rule, including the bit about how you "should" work from home "if you can"

basically it's not worth the paper it's printed on (apparently it cost £5 million)

If this is true then I think it's perfectly fine to say you hope all tories drown in their own lung goo.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2020 12:26

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Z the IVth posted:

They left the meeting ID up. Anyone want to have a go guessing the 6 digit password? If you get in an goatse the cabinet you'll go down in history.

C O R O N A

# ¿ Mar 31, 2020 18:50

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# ¿ May 11, 2024 18:43

Dell_Zincht: Nov 5, 2003

Jedit posted:

A useful link for prebooking the wall: https://www.lewiscotter.com/brands?fbclid=IwAR0s2dh18zgt8Vxi62IqwSEt70WCGzhoVBe9OqAgIvnp3iwX0eL2eHex1fM

Pass it around, add information if you have it.

Thanks for this, definitely making a note of all the companies I used to use frequently but will not be touching with a bargepole when all this is over.

Also, holy gently caress that termination letter from Wren:

https://uploads-ssl.webflow.com/5da5779bcc68914355c323ef/5e80ce17d75a9b4b61f87a79_Wren%20-%20notice%20of%20termination%20no%20meta.pdf

"Hi, Come in and sit down" how loving patronising and smug is that, what a bunch of cunts.

# ¿ Mar 31, 2020 18:59

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT March 2020 - Bojo got the Covo