Notorious R.I.M. posted:

COVID-19 MAY 2020 USA CUM DEATHS GUESSING GAME
Guess how many cumulative deaths we have on worldometer's COVID-19 report for May 31st for the USA. The closest guess gets the satisfaction of being smarter than a bunch of idiot epidemiologists. If you are dead on May 31st, you may not redeem this prize. The guessing window closes at +07:00 GMT on May 2nd.

fits my needs posted:

https://twitter.com/nmeyersohn/status/1256049685925634050?s=20

Fly Molo posted:

just go around door to door asking people, say you heard that 1/2 the tenants aren’t paying rent next month and you don’t want to unless other people are, then ask what they’re gonna do??

be the change you want to see in the world

Bert Roberge posted:

https://twitter.com/EyesLeftPod/status/1256038171449503744

Mayor Dave posted:

https://twitter.com/ParkerMolloy/status/1256288833894846464?s=20

snoo posted:

I like being at home. everyone should be at home

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/AFP/status/1256712571324977152

Notorious R.I.M. posted:

Tunicate posted:

It has come to my attention that in certain circles, simian-minded individuals are refering to covidcons as 'covid cons', ignorantly placing a space between 'covid' and 'con'. Perhaps their brains have dulled by years of Madden and Quake, rather than the mentally invigorating games such as Arc the Lad and Growlanser, becuase even a child could tell that placing a space between the 'covid' and 'con' in covidcon is perhaps more profoundly philistine than a certain American administration that need not be named. Placing a space in covidcon completely belittles the meaning of the word and displays the user's blatantly minuscule intellect and is understanding of the basic precepts of grammar. Covidcon is a perfect marriage of the words corona, virus, and console creating a short and effective portmanteau that quickly and accurately labels mentions objects and anybody who does not immediately recognize 'covid con' as absolutely outrageous clearly lacks the mental faculties to correctly operate a covidcon other than perhaps FIFA Sports. I make this point becuase I have recently been belligerently barrage by imbecilic 'covid con' references that unnerve me to no end and have taken it upon myself to correct the damage that your poor Western education ( though this is a subject to be discussed on a later date) has wrought upon you. You should personally thank me that i did not see it fit to correct your preponderous mistake in Japanese, becuase I am thoroughly positive your neanderthal mind would be incapable of deciphering the Hiragana from the Katakana.

Apraxin posted:

lots of negative feelings in the thread this morning, how about an inspirational quote/fanfic to chase those blues away?
https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/1256957565562486784

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/CharlieGileNBC/status/1256631520355377153

Lucky Greedo posted:

work in retail in fl and lust for the death of this cursed civilization

the level of hostility directed at even our extremely basic safety measures is shocking. i'm used to being abused on the regular, but not like this. everyone has lost their drat minds. got physically rammed with shopping carts by two different karens in the swimsuit section. college lads tried to run me over with their car in the parking lot bc i was still wearing a mask; they made a bunch of fake coughing and retching noises at me when i ducked out of the way. our fitting rooms are closed and middle aged women are stripping to their underwear in the middle of the store to try on our lovely clothes, then screaming at us when we tell them to stop. it's like watching a hive of insects trying to gently caress, eat and kill each other all at once in a massive suicidal frenzy.

Gripweed posted:

How did he think bombs would get business open? If a business finds a bomb they have to close and call the bomb squad! It's the exact opposite of what he wants!

mod sassinator posted:

the trump administration is going to drive him to suicide is my bet

facetoucher cat posted:

I would eat the poo poo out of some Red Lobster right now, idk

The Saucer Hovers posted:

LORDS of the LAND

Crusader posted:

https://twitter.com/ScottGottliebMD/status/1257428267985965056

703 posted:

https://twitter.com/baltimoresun/status/1257516646966714369

ocean lovely

GATES FOUNDATION posted:

Chicago subreddit melting down at JB's technocrat plan to gradually reopen illinois based on numbers, they are threatening to "cancel" their leases and move to a non-lockdown state like Texas or Florida.

The astroturfing has gotten out of hand

Chinatown posted:

the video loving owns

https://twitter.com/AlyssiaByrd13/status/1257492660933332992

old people driving cars at any time is loving terrifying

quote:

With beaches and the boardwalk in Ocean City, Maryland, set to reopen this weekend, visitors from out of the area are encouraged to continue following a statewide stay-at-home order — but police will not be checking license plates or otherwise restricting visitors to one of the state’s most popular summer destinations, Mayor Rick Meehan said Tuesday.

Meehan said his declaration reopening the beaches and boardwalk on May 9 does not supersede Gov. Larry Hogan’s stay-at-home directive ordered last month to slow the spread of the new coronavirus.

“At this time, you should only travel to Ocean City if doing so would not be in violation of the governor’s specific stay-at-home order,” Meehan said during a news briefing Tuesday morning.

But the mayor said he still expected some visitors from outside the Ocean City area would still travel there when the beaches reopen.

“Quite honestly, they’ve probably been coming here already,” he said.

mastershakeman posted:

Finally, my decades long feasting on turkey burgers pays off since no one else wants to eat them

CODChimera posted:

I'm not fully convinced all of this is real

a.lo posted:

Sicko de Mayo

gregday posted:

https://twitter.com/CNBC/status/1258054254733996032

longpig is back on the menu boys

Zil posted:

https://twitter.com/nypost/status/1258094881786007552?s=20

quote:

But other scientists pooh-poohed the method, saying it’s no sure way to wipe out the pandemic.

InsertPotPun posted:

america now has a show in which you go on television and hope you are skilled enough to flatter the president enough that he'll help you not die.

"please help me mister president" is all about the right looks and the right attitude.
this week is "nurses" who made two critical mistakes: they didn't send anyone from "central casting". your "nurse" must look like a candy stripper from the 50's, leggy, angular blondes will go far
and, worst of all, they corrected the president. that kind of "i know stuff" attitude is heavily discouraged at PHMMP. if you say you know stuff that might give someone the impression that the president does NOT know something. this is not allowed. at all times the operative phrase is "we're looking into it". the president's ideas are always breakthrough ideas that no one has ever looked at before and you'll get on that immediately!! follow up not needed.

so sorry nurses, you didn't do nearly as well as the evangelicals or kim kardashian. maybe you'll get another chance next month if the president is still acknowledging that the virus is still around.

NofrikinfuN posted:

i honestly believe trump would leave and just make a big fuss about how "rigged and unfair it was and actually, people are saying he won" on the way out the door

he doesnt love the job, he loves the attention and his audience will go with him

SpiderHyphenMan posted:

https://twitter.com/kaitlancollins/status/1258140005253500928

Inceltown posted:

Drinkfist posted:

I am still in the bad call mindset. All options on the table are bad and the window where good decisions could be made has long passed. Capitalism is about to kick down everyone's front door. Doesn't matter what your politics or beliefs are. This is literally history book poo poo going on right now. You reopen the business as usual and I GUARANTEE you will see millions kicked on the loving street the second the landlord lobby cracks that no-eviction order. Where is everyone gonna go? What kind of jobs can these people get when Retail, Restaurants and Service industries are bankrupt from the entire consumer class vanishing? Where are they gonna get food while all the farms are dumping their worthless harvests to rot in a field and farmers without locked in contracts have no idea how to scale anything anymore? Who the gently caress is gonna get on a plane or pass though a crowed airport security and where the hell would they go?

Congress turned on the money printer and everyone saw it. They printed money for the fed to literally buy up every poo poo investment to bail out the entire upper class and they are going to outright walk away with the bag. We got 1,200 bucks and told that ought to get us though it.

They could have just done a rent and mortgage freeze and printed the loss right into the banks holding the contracts and boom everyone has breathing room. They could have done a federal wage guarantee and just told all the employers to fire no one and send everyone home and just pick up the wage bill with the printer now all the small businesses don't need a loan. Then fix the whole publicly traded market by either halting trade or literally buying a holding in every nationally critical sector and nationalize the whole thing to never have a crisis again. Then picked up Medicare for All and just printed the "How you gonna pay for it" argument into oblivion and pay everyone's medical bills. Then when it is all said and done you got all this poo poo on the counties books you just inflation leverage the thing into a dark corner to pay for itself and in 20 years no one will know it ever existed because the world economics needs dollars to trade and it can't fail. Boom country saved and after six months of lockdown we all come out after a great vacation and get a spike in divorces but nothing else.

We chose hellworld. This was a choice. And there isn't a single person you can vote for that would fix this come November. The progressive rebellion was defeated. Bernie got a brainslug slapped on his head. Both parties are totally pro hellworld and it is going to take decades for the hosed generation to get actual power in high office when there is a nation of amped superpowered grifters that will torpedo you for life using everything at the disposal of the information age.

Welcome to history book hellworld. Your kids are gonna be reading about this in a loving shack after being required to buy the book for 900 dollars and the homework will still require a cd key.

The worst part of all of this is those not willing to let it slide like this are gonna choose violence because there is literally no other path open to them in their lifetime.

COVID-420 posted:

trump freaking out about the virus made me realize he's gonna get it soon enough.

he might be asymptomatic sure. maybe. maybe not.

euphronius posted:

https://twitter.com/aravosis/status/1258458961646419968?s=21

facetoucher cat posted:

https://twitter.com/VentureBeat/status/1258902033677107207

Steve Yun posted:

one way labyrinth actually sounds kinda fun

have clerks ask customers riddles to progress so it feels like an escape room

Inceltown posted:

https://twitter.com/BDayBoysMitch/status/1258976405628444673