Literal Carehaver posted:

i want to see a star wars movie where grizzled rebel insurgents take imperial officer's family members hostage and blackmail the impy officers in to subverting the empire in some way

then the rebels record proof of the subversion and blackmail the officer further until they defect out of lack of choice or get exposed and executed

also a jedi is on screen for like a second but is sprayed down at all angles with laser fire and dies screaming in anguish

Fetus Tree posted:

han dated one that was kind of a bitch

Cyberball 2072 posted:

The super ship ends up being a macguffin for the story so it's there for a reason but no it cant be a plain ol corvette, its THE CARRION SPIKE and it was hand desgined by Tarkin himself and full of dumb bullshit to make it the bestest ship ever.
And yea, turns out Tarkin in addition to being a governor and guy in charge of the universe's most feared weapon/battle station, he spent his days as a youth on THE CARRION PLATEAU being trained by his super poacher uncle that taught him how to define the characteristics of a species and then break them down ::coughThrawnHACKHACK::

I will say that I still enjoyed the audiobook and found it plenty entertaining, it's far better than "Cloak of Deception" which I am wrapping up offa youtube. But despite being entertaining enough "Tarkin" is still full of the dumb bullshit we all love to hate the EU for.

I think if I was actually reading this stuff it would come off much worse and I wouldn't finish most of it. All the production in the audiobooks makes them like little radio dramas so they pass the time while working well enough.

freethought posted:

That doesn't make me cringe. That single moment, when millions of nerd voices cried out in terror made the whole drat thing worthwhile. That and those "Ask a Sith" threads.

Heck, it still makes me smile. Boba Fett is dead. He fell in the loving Sarlaac and there's nothing anyone can say otherwise. Finally, after two decades of that poo poo we get a break.

I know they're going to do that poo poo all over again, I know. They'll probably make a loving movie about him getting out of that loving pit but for now he is loving dead.

Calico Heart posted:

the rogue one concept art looks like they want to do some kind of downbeat loving star was Nam movie

https://uk.yahoo.com/movies/star-wars-rogue-one-concept-art-detailed-113776076869.html

fortunate sun crusher

5er posted:

As this thread gravitates back towards the defense of the wholesale creativity black hole that is the SWEU, I am delighted again with (Disney necrotized) Lucasfilms stating the old EU is non-canon. So long, thanks for all the masturbatory self-inserts and moronic interpretations of magic bacteria power limitations!

But. There's a darker truth, and a darker future.

The old EU is out, but these merchandising whores sure as hell aren't going to discourage a new one from erupting, like an ignored pilonodal cyst on the Wookiee-like furry crack of an average fanfiction author. This new EU will be incubated in the vile, pederastic ichor of the Internet-emboldened furvert, the brony, and the maladjusted 'social justice warrior' who is just waiting to bring Darth Ableism into the world.

The King is dead, long live the King.

shiksa posted:

the world's greatest injustice was that this wasn't filmed oj style so the internet could put audioclips from the podrace scene over it

*jake lloyd drives over a median* Whoopee!!!!

Lonos Oboe posted:

I never read the Thrawn books as a kid. I always wanted to and then got distracted with much edgier stuff like Warhammer and the Aliens novelisations. I did read the Jedi Academy books which I enjoyed and even on the re-read a few years ago I kinda liked the spice mines stuff even if the rest was fairly shite. I started reading the Thrawn books, having been assured that is was the high point of the E.U. last December and have just managed to start book 3 out of sheer indifference. I have no problem reading pulpy stuff. But jesus christ its dry like raw cream crackers. It's not bad by all means but I find it hard to engage with it.

I fully endorse Xenomorph's bid for mod, even if he is being unbelievably brazen about it.

Lonos Oboe posted:

Yeah, Earth Hive and Nightmare Asylum stand up really well. They are very bleak and really build the world up very well. The character of General Spears was a fantastic mix of Patton, Schwarzkopf and those guys that trained dolphins to blow up submarines. Those two books really try to expand the universe in imaginative ways and maintain the best horror elements from the series. What bugs me the most about the Star Wars books is the blatant copying of the movies. There is a scene in the second Thrawn book where Leia says to Han. "See ya later, I love you." And he throws back the "I know" It's small stuff but it really bothered me because it's totally out of character for the kind of Han Solo who has settled down and married and has a position of authority. Let the characters grow up a little and not define their existence by the films.

I always liked reading the fluff in the second edition codexes for Warhammer but the books never did it for me. The characters are generally not engaging or I can't relate to their weird extremist life where the concept of people living a normal life or having vices that are not flaws in character is unheard of. I would love to read a world war Z style Warhammer book that reports on a war with first hand accounts. That was always the best stuff in my opinion. Some dude travels around interviewing Orks or imprisoned Chaos Space Marines and ditches all the weird "praise the emperor" poo poo. War in Warhammer is oddly clinical. The soldiers are so poorly drawn that they are all cutouts. Have them playing cards, drinking and talking about fixing up their hover bikes when they get home so they can go for a drive and finger their girlfriends while smoking space weed and I would be on board.

Xenomrph posted:

Cross posting this from the Alien thread in CineD because it's applicable


tl;dr - fandoms can be awful, water is wet, the sun is bright, etc

Otisburg posted:

http://epicstream.com/news/The-Force-Awakens-Actors-Want-Dying-Star-Wars-Fan-To-See-Film-Early


i knew it was pretty bad, but I had no idea it was that bad.

Groovelord Neato posted:

it was like twenty years ago! but that multiplayer was the bomb.


i feel like Supreme Leader Snoke had to be in his notes when disney bought star wars because that's a p poo poo name.

Shalebridge Cradle posted:

Oh bullshit you almost had with your


oh well nevermind

OldMemes posted:

In his book on the New Hollywood movement of the 1970s, Easy Riders and Raging Bulls, Peter Biskind makes a pretty convincing case that Lucas may be on the spectrum. Apparently he's refuse to talk to people or make eye contact, so meetings had to be heavily prompted by Francis Ford Coppola. When makiing THX-1138, Lucas spent months and months obbessively reediting the film, until Coppola had to basically take the work print so they could have test screenings. The script for Star Wars became a denser and denser work of background lore with each draft.

Originally Lucas wanted to title the first film 'Adventures of Luke Starkiller, as taken from the Journal of the Whills, Saga I: The Star Wars' but was convinced to change it to A New Hope.

(American Graffti and THX-1138 are still great movies, so the guy at least directed three really, really good films).

TK-42-1 posted:

Iblis was Patton since he was an obstinate rear end in a top hat too. From what I've seen TFA's Imperial Remnant went way out to the far outer rim and basically fell out of sight/mind after Jakku. Jakku was like some final battle that broke the back of the Imps and they bolted. Now they're moving back in and people are freaking out.

Gammatron 64 posted:

I dont, its a bad article and I thought I would share it

If your 22 yr old kids think attack of the clones is the best movie, its not too late to have an abortion

blowfish posted:

in star wars everyone seems to be awfully eager to demilitarise

RFC2324 posted:

Then who is North Korea?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCe8iai-SRs

TK-42-1 posted:

That's what 1313 was supposed to be. Like uncharted but in seedy Coruscant. I'm still kind of bitter about it being shuttered since it had the potential to be a nonshitty Star Wars thing.

Booblord Zagats posted:

That's actually really cool. Both of them are super loving talented

William Bear posted:

Nym is one of the things from the EU I like. His bulge in the Essential Guide to Characters, however, makes me cringe.

Groovelord Neato posted:

guardians of the galaxy is the best marvel flick.

OneThousandMonkeys posted:

Essentially, if you think that a huge glut of Star Wars titles coming down the pipeline is not going to have at least a couple of poo poo sandwiches, or that the Big lovely EU could ever truly die, you're hopelessly naive or you just mindlessly consume this poo poo as long as it has the branding.

What we're going to see in the next 10 years is a massive expansion of content for this franchise, and we've already seen that the EU in particular will just eat its own barf and then throw it back up on you over and over again for years. Now imagine that but with an even more intense marketing push.

drunk asian neighbor posted:

lol

Breaking Benjamin Frontman: 'Star Wars: Battlefront' Game 'Sucks poo poo!'

Otisburg posted:

RotS handilly claims "most tolerable of PT" by virtue of McDiarmid's gleeful scenery chewing.

Pook Good Mook posted:

Of course, then he adds Vader saying "NOOO" in the Blu-rays in ROTJ so it's a give and take.

WeaponGradeSadness posted:

I'm like a third of the way through Lost Stars, I think it's called, the new YA Star Wars book, and it's surprisingly pretty good so far. So far it's sorta standard YA fare about two friends--or maybe more??? Because YA-- at the Imperial Academy on Coruscant getting up to teenage boarding school hijinks but apparently one's going to join the Rebels while one stays loyal to the Empire and it goes through and slightly past the events of the original trilogy. It's not amazing or anything but I like it pretty well.

The free 10% Kindle sample of that new Battlefront: Twilight Company book was pretty good too and I may end up getting that once I'm done with this one.

Is the new EU... actually good?

Otisburg posted:

Dash Rendar is Poochie as gently caress. He's Han Solo through the lens of a Mountain Dew commercial.

What bugs me about SoTe and Dash is that clearly there was some kind of writer's room meeting where they were like "Okay, we need a rogue sort of hero, like Han Solo, and a cool souped-up freighter like the Millenium Falcon."

Bitch, you have Lando with the actual Falcon, doing nothing much until he infiltrates Jabba's palace. Use him!

PostNouveau posted:

Nah, you want Al Swearingen as the competent, menacing bad guy pulling Kylo Ren's strings.

Adam Driver on "Girls" does weird angst with angry mood swings really well. Now that I think of it, his character is a lot like Hayden Christensen's Anakin. If Kylo Ren's going to be a bitchy Darth Vader fanboy, they hit the nail on the head.

Groovelord Neato posted:

Groovelord Neato posted:

this is how a normal human would interpret it but nerds take everything literally and also need every tiny thing explained. i've read a number of articles talking about they want the next movie to explain what happened between return of the jedi and the force awakens and where the new order came from when we don't need any of that and would probably be insanely stupid and we already have all the information we need about all of that in the force awakens.

Chill la Chill posted:

I made the mistake of engaging some ubernerds (I'm not at their power level of nerd yet ) about Snoke being plague is cuz now they're bringing up all this poo poo from the background. "Psychometry" is a thing now cuz I guess it was popular in the Harry Potter series. It was in the dark disciple book apparently.


And drat they really can't wrap their heads around plague is just being a lie told to Anakin instead of some EU character with a biography.

Panzeh posted:

So, uh, EU nerds, what happened to the sepratists after the third movie? Did they join the rebellion or did they all just die?

DeusExMachinima posted:

alriiight nerds, I've heard about the EU bugnest orgy for years and I just need to know what the gently caress that's referencing. I'll even settle for a star wars wikia link. It's driving me insane not understanding

Xenomrph posted:

Speaking of Rey, what are people's thoughts on the complaint that she's a Mary Sue?

Like I can't disagree since the movie shows her as inherently good at literally everything (often without any training whatsoever) and she doesn't have a whole lot of apparent flaws holding her back, so she checks off a lot of the boxes for "lovely fanfic Mary Sue character".

But on the other hand, she was genuinely fun to watch and even Rey seems somewhat shocked with how easily she can do some poo poo so it kinda mitigates it, and also Daisy Ridley is cute as heck.

Jurgan posted:

I never liked Yoda's inverted speech in the prequels. He's smart enough to figure out English (sorry, Basic), so I figured the only reason he talked that way was because he'd been isolated for decades and gotten senile. Well, that and it made him seem like comic relief, which fooled the audience into thinking he was unimportant.

spacemang_spliff posted:

I took my special lady friend to see it and it was in a much bigger theater than when I saw it the first night. People clapped at the beginning. People clapped when they showed the mellennium falcon. People clapped when Han showed up.

I don't get why people clap in a movie theater... Harrison Ford can't hear you bros

Cthulu Carl posted:

He also hated Kyp Durron's Fonz impersonation

Babe Magnet posted:

Vader doesn't even look like he's trying.

Otisburg posted:

I realize mocking the SJW's is low hanging fruit, but as a nerd dad who was thrilled to share the new one with his kid, and failing in like 4 different stores to find a drat Rey doll, I'm kind of feeling that. There's a weird football-headed alien that was cut from the movie all day long, but no daggone Rey.