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Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Leon Einstein posted:

The cousin was way out of line, but the line about her "ruined vagina" irks me and is very misogynistic.

And that line from the cousin about how her life will ultimately be worthless and that she will end up bitter and alone because she chose career over a ~baby~ wasn't?

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Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Leon Einstein posted:

Where did I say that? Jesus, not every situation is one good guy and one bad guy. They both said stupid poo poo.

Well I don't think they're both assholes either. The OP was subjected to several hours of harassment over her lack of baby despite everyone knowing she is physically incapable of having one. And when the cousin ramped it up to some seriously offensive poo poo, the woman snapped.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Stop calling fake on stories. Buncha wet blankets and fun killers in this thread.

Edit: rape isn’t a joke.

Dazerbeams fucked around with this message at 14:31 on Feb 15, 2019

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I knew someone was going to comment. Seriously though, everything posted in this thread has the potential to be made up bullshit so if you call out one you might as well call them all out. Pete is as real or fake as every other story.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

How dare a woman have opinions about a piece of jewelry that she’ll be expected and hoping to wear for the rest of her married life. Whose sentimentality is entirely one sided.

She handled the proposal like a huge rear end in a top hat though. Men are delicate creatures that need to be coddled and lied to because the truth is too painful. Should have tucked the heirloom into the back of a jewelry box and gotten a shiny new placeholder that can withstand everyday wear and tear.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

If you're going to make the effort to go to a restaurant, at least choose something that isn't bland as gently caress. If you want trash, get fast food. If you want a meal, take the time to find a decent place that isn't a chain.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

This is extremely late but if you want to use your maiden name professionally, don’t change it when you get married. I’m in research and work alongside doctors and a large number of women keep their maiden name. Having two sounds stupid and a pain in the rear end. Even worse if you’re trying to mix and match. That’s just asking for trouble.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

If the woman cared so much about her drink, she should have watched it more closely.

Seriously though, don’t be lovely to people you want something from. Make them want to help you otherwise they might just say gently caress it.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Straight White Shark posted:

This is great practical advice but it doesn't change the fact that the dude is 110% an rear end in a top hat.

They were at the airport, the assumption should be that everyone is an rear end in a top hat. You start off nasty and you’re never gonna get comped. Is it really so hard to ask for something civilly rather than expect/demand it? Woman would have been free to turn nasty if the guy declined after a polite “excuse me? Do you mind paying for the drink your kid spilled?” But she started off putting the guy on the defensive and in no mood to help.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for refusing to replace a drink that my toddler knocked over because the girl was rude.

I was at baggage claim at the airport with my son, who’s 3. We were leaving and as we’re walking away, this girl yells “excuse me!” At me. I turn and she points to her Starbucks drink which is spilled on the floor and says “your kid did that.”

I ask my son if he spilled it and he said he bumped it. The girl says “it was $5” and looks at me expectantly. I was pissed about how rude she was and the way she was just looking at me and expecting me to pay for her mocha frappa-whatever without even asking, so I just shrugged and walked away. My partner called me an rear end in a top hat when I told her the story. AITA?

No rude behavior here. Beep boop, this is how decent people interact with each other. Woman might have been in the right but she was lovely as hell about it and got the response she deserved.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Jesus, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised goons have no clue on how to interact with other people. My mistake.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I've never heard of a kitchen dresser before. Where in the world is this a thing?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Sometimes it sounds really wonderful to be a kept woman. Minus the dumbass husband who is too stupid to appreciate even more money pouring in.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Sometimes, I wish these stories would end with the woman just clocking the guy in the nose. That she is still calling this loser her boyfriend saddens me.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Pirate Radar posted:

Coincidentally, here’s one from today’s Dear Prudence

You posted violence as the opener, not the closer. And while I don’t condone domestic abuse, I appreciate the effort.

Racist boyfriend shoulda got punched though.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

For the record, is anyone accusing the mom of being sexist for wanting girls instead of boys?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

A clump of cells is not a baby.

Also more girls in the world is a good thing, since apparently China and India have skewed it towards men this past generation or so.

Dazerbeams fucked around with this message at 21:18 on Mar 20, 2019

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

value-brand cereal posted:

Wont someone think of the men who need wives?????????????????

This thread has proven that men don’t deserve wives.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I hope one of her chapters is essentially gamemaster anthony's birthday party.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Maybe the couch is quality leather that was taken good care of over the generations?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

That woman should have run screaming as soon as the dad asked "why?"

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Why bother marrying or living together? Why? Why? Why?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I love my wife except that I’ve had to lock her out of the most important part of my life: the cheese sanctum.

Is it child abuse to be subjected to the poly lifestyle of your parents? There’s gotta be a study on it somewhere.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I wonder if the old fat poly cheese bag couple can maintain lasting relationships with anyone else. Like, do they bring home a steady boyfriend/girlfriend every now and then? Someone who is familiar with their habits and decided it was acceptable? Or do they just bring in a string of randos because who in their right mind would ever come back after seeing locks and mini fridges in the separate bedrooms?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Cheese should be served on a platter you heathen.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

CheesyDog posted:

"Sorry for the mess" I said, escorting my newest poly catch into my solo bedroom. "My wife has been in, looks like she's gotten into my shreddies again."

My date pursed her lip; my heart skipped a beat as I took in the look of concern that flashed across her beautiful, ample face. Her Fetlife photos had not done justice to her Reubenesque features; I silently cursed my wife's dairy list for putting my tryst with this moon-faced angel at risk.

"Are you sure this is.... how we do this?" she asked. "Won't she hear?"

"Don't worry. Don't worry..." I quickly brushed the stringy queso crumbs off of the bed, tossing the empty bag into the recycling bin I kept at the foot of the bed. My sweet queso fresco sat down readily, relieving legs weary from the basement stairs.

"She is fine with it, and besides she'll be asleep for another 13 hours." I opened up the smart home app on my phone; the lights of the Cheese Cave dimmed to a romantic annatto hue.

"Now, are you ready... to fondue it?"

Not my shreddies!

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

La Brea Carpet posted:

I'm the upscale restaurant that costs less than fifty bucks for a couple.

Are you mocking Olive Garden right now?!

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I really hope that covering them with special sauce isn’t a euphemism and sock man is just a failed experimental chef.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I get no emotional or financial support from my boyfriend, how do I call him out about one particular lovely trait without leaving him?

edit: Oh poo poo, uh have some content

I [26F] am sick and tried of my boyfriend's [28M] refusal to contribute to our household

quote:

I know this is an age-old problem, but I could use some advice because my tactics haven’t been working. I’ve been living with my boyfriend for about 2 years now. We’re mostly really great together and I’m very happy with him. However, in the time we’ve been cohabitating, it’s become clear that he does not care about being an equal partner when it comes to household maintenance (chores/cooking), and what’s worse, he doesn’t seem to take seriously how much that bothers me. Plus, he’s a bit of a slob and does things like leaving dirty clothes EVERYWHERE, letting food trash sit around, and just generally does not clean up after himself on a daily basis. Relevant info: we are both professionals, but he’s in tech and makes way, way more money than me. Despite that we both work full-time, I sometimes feel like he views his much more substantial financial contribution to our household as a free pass when it comes to chores. I’ve mentioned this, but he says it’s not true.

We’ve had lots of conversations about this, which tend go one of three ways: (1) he tells me that he just doesn’t notice things/doesn’t know how to clean. That’s may be partially true--he grew up in a household where he wasn’t expected to do chores and grew accustomed to a fairy woman magically making everything clean--which is a role that I have now assumed in his life. However, I make a point of asking him to do specific things, show him how to do chores, and point out when he leaves a mess behind. There has been no progress in his “awareness,” willful or otherwise. (2) He’ll apologize and say how grateful he is for everything I do, and promise to do better. But that “do better” time never comes, and I end up feeling like he’s making empty promises to squash my complaints. (3) He gets angry and points out completely unrelated ways in which I am not a perfect partner OR will describe how I also don’t always pick up after myself immediately. When he does the latter, he’ll say that it’s unfair for me to expect him to do chores on my timeline when he doesn’t demand the same of me. That would be a fair point if he HAD a timeline for this stuff. But I’ve tried that many times, leaving his mess untouched--and inevitably, once I get sick of the same trash or laundry pile sitting in the living room for over a week, I’ll cave and clean it myself.

I understand that sometimes there are compatibility issues when it comes to standards of cleanliness, but I would not call myself a neat freak at all. It’s just that we live in a nice apartment and have nice things and I want things to look…decently nice, and not filled with trash all the time. He often points out that the mess doesn’t bother him, whereas my counter is, of course it doesn’t because you take it for granted that somehow it will *mysteriously* all become clean if he waits on me long enough. Besides, I don’t care if he’s fine with living in a college-dorm level of squalor; to me, maintaining a home is a basic requirement of adulthood. When he does small things that I very pointedly ask of him, like take out the trash, he’ll often demand thanks for it. This drives me absolutely crazy. I feel that nearly all of the household work I do is invisible to him, and it’s laughable to imagine demanding his thanks/praise every time I do something. And in any case, I’m not looking for a “helper” here. I expect that my partner should take equal responsibility for the home we equally live in.

The gender analysis of all of this is not lost on me. Like, as much as I know that he views me as an equal in most ways, I think he seriously takes me for granted on this issue. Despite the frustrations I’ve voiced in this post, we are a mostly happy couple and I love this guy a lot. I see a future together, but this issue is actually super worrisome in that context. If we have this much trouble with balancing chores, I can’t imagine the issues that would arise if we were to have kids together. I’ve never wanted to be a homemaker and have a career of my own that demands just as much time and energy as his, despite our differences in pay. How can I get him to take this problem seriously?

TLDR: We both work, but only I cook/clean. How can I communicate to my partner that this issue is actually very serious to me? What are some strategies to establish him as a contributor to household tasks?

Dazerbeams fucked around with this message at 16:47 on Mar 23, 2019

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Smirking_Serpent posted:

Positive for Chlamydia, boyfriend yells whenever I express insecurity, and semen-like wet spots on the bed when I got home last night. Am I being crazy?

That poor woman needs to be put down. It’s the only humane cure for abject stupidity.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

"I look forward to my wedding night where I will be impregnated by the spirit of my dead fiance, so that I can eventually give birth to the reincarnation of my dead fiance." - a totally sane woman

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Antivehicular posted:

Yeah, launching into a huge crying fit about how you've tried for so long and how hard it's been to keep a brave face would be the power move for most MILs, but this one seems monomaniacal enough that she'd blast past "pressure you about IVF" and go straight to "kidnap children from an eastern European orphanage and present them to you with birth certificates pre-filled out with her preferred grandbaby names"

Nah, this type of MIL is looking for her own flesh and blood to carry on the FAMILY NAME.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Is it normal and healthy for a person to become so engrossed in a hobby that personal relationships lose their luster? Sounds kind of crazy to me.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Anime is ruining this thread.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

Also like literally a couple hundred million people play video games in America alone, so way to look down upon much of the US population. :laugh:

Have you seen who our president is?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Mom (F49) posted screenshots of dads (M55) dating site profile to family chat
u/sarahhh11

I just woke up and opened WhatsApp. New message in family chat. ’Screenshots of dads dating profile site. Last log in 3 hours ago. Profile made 2017.’ drat. I took that profile photo of him. Does he want a new family or wtf is he after??

I’m heartbroken, but I feel so bad for my dad. I’ve always been his little princess, but my three other siblings (all over 18) have literally hated dad for the past x years. The main reason for this, has been my mom. She is really manipulative and means towards dad, although they’ve been together for over 27 yrs. Everytime dad has done something that mom doesn’t like, she would really make sure the whole family would be against dad. No wonder my siblings are all messed up in their head mentally... But yeah, during this year abroad (have not seen parents in a year) I really thought things had been going to a better direction... Parents have posted so many loving pictures online etc. and travelled together.

I don’t know what to do/say/think about this. I want to be so angry at my dad for tearing the family apart and making me scared of relationships. But at the same time, I want to be so angry at my mom for embarrassing dad again in front of everyone and making the whole drat family hate him even more.

How have your parents dealt with one of them cheating? How have you felt about it? Did your parents even tell you? What the hell should I comment on the family chat???? I just hate picking up sides.... :,,,,,,(

Pro tip to everyone: don’t make kids, when you’re not mentally ready. The kids will just end up being your psychologists.

TLDR: Dads profile of 2 years caught on dating site. Manipulative mom posted screenshots on family chat and wrote a bunch of hateful comments. I don’t know what to think about all this. Which side to choose?

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Doc Hawkins posted:

Go Pregnant or Go Home

I hate this. It’s kitschy and awful.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

I think we should give the mom some slack. Imagine trying to raise intelligent and sexually safe children and succeeding with the first, only to find out your second is an utter moron intent on making one of the worst possible decisions that will affect not only her own life, but the parents and the potential child as well. Seriously, that 15 year old girl wants to gently caress potentially 4 people over, not bothering to mention the father of the kid or the father's parents. Do whatever you gotta do to convince the girl to not turbofuck everything for the foreseeable future.

Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

I think that, given the benefit of hindsight, the parent who forever alienates their child but still convinces them to get the abortion is a better parent than the one who "supports them no matter what" and stands by their side while they dive headfirst into a life of suffering. I don't think I could ever leave my child to suffer forever but I could certainly imagine making them think I would so that they come to their senses.

Agreed. Life is already hard enough as it is. No need to willfully make it 100x harder without fully grasping the situation until it's far too late to back out.

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Dazerbeams
Jul 8, 2009

Can we maybe not double down on being gigantic pricks here? I use this thread as a coping mechanism while my current job situation circles the toilet. I'd rather not see it locked.

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