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Psycho Society posted:Good for her jumping in with her family when they decided to spontaneously assault her husband, gotta let that dirty hispanic animal know his place after all.
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Feb 24, 2017 21:56
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food court bailiff posted:Anything other than jiu-jitsu, which as Slugworth mentioned, is not good for stopping dogs. Lately I've been using capoeira to great effect. Nuke the dog from orbit...it's the only way to be sure.
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Feb 27, 2017 21:07
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Antivehicular posted:This is another classic "someone just keeps making the worst choice/possessed by an idiot ghost" story, except that I think the boyfriend may just be the idiot ghost. The concept that this man is 28 is unendingly depressing. Prank that fucker to death with a tire iron.
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Mar 3, 2017 01:07
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Yawgmoth posted:Wow so this guy is sad/mad that his girlfriend is perfect?
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Mar 3, 2017 21:14
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Bubblyblubber posted:Hahaha teenagers are so lovely goddamn
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Mar 6, 2017 19:20
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boner confessor posted:the only thing she can do is leave him but im wondering why the 28 year old is dating a middle aged alcoholic in the first place Is she dating him or married to him? She calls him her husband throughout the post.
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Apr 19, 2017 23:21
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Me [21 F] with this guy I've known for a while[21 M], rejected him because he's religious, now I'm the bitch. He's such a "nice guy" that when he got rejected he went off on her and then made passive-aggressive posts on Facebook for all their common friends to see. It especially sucks that he basically said that she actually asked him to give up his religion for her, when her post makes it fairly clear that she pretty much didn't want to date that shithead, at all, regardless of what he believed.
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Apr 24, 2017 18:26
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Dienes posted:The "previously recorded boyfriend in secret to catch him jerking off when he's attempting to be discreet" puts me firmly on Team Husband on this one. In this case, the husband is probably right. However, the boyfriend in Me [29 M] found out my girlfriend [26 F] of 4 years, Is cheating and refuses to stop or leave my house. from a few pages back should probably be recording his arguments with his cheating girlfriend.
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Apr 24, 2017 20:13
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ArbitraryC posted:This reminded me of a goon that used to post a lot about his miserable relationship and kept an excel spreadsheet to track his monthly handjobs. gently caress, if you're reduced to begging for and tracking your handjobs, you might as well just end it, your relationship is doomed anyway.
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Apr 26, 2017 21:29
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It's probably Peregrine, but they call him Pippin. Goddamn hippies.
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Apr 26, 2017 21:44
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Who What Now posted:Says the dude who thinks a small child will be seen as a literal daemon-lord from the blackest pits of hell because they are called "Beezy". Or Damien
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Apr 26, 2017 22:03
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Fullhouse posted:a handjob is the sneakiest sex act and thus perfectly suited for being performed under a blanket when in a room full of people watching a movie See, I've never understood this. Surreptitious handjobs are even worse because they can only lead to two undesirable outcomes: you've either gotta stop before completion or you get loving jizz everywhere in a room/bus/theatre full of people. Sure, a woman has her hand on your dick for a bit, but mostly it's a literal cock tease.
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Apr 26, 2017 22:08
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Danaru posted:Me[29M] dating a girl[28F] for a week and she shows up at my moms house unannounced Now, there was no way she was "just in the neighborhood". Her apartment and work were across the city and there was nothing conceivably in the area that she could have been there for, especially with recently baked cookies. Plus, at no point had I even talked with her about what I was going to be doing at work, much less where we'd be making a delivery. Turns out she called my work to ask for me and, when told I was out on a delivery, she got the location by saying that she had to talk to me immediately because there was a family emergency (there wasn't). This was in the early 90s before mobile phones were as ubiquitous as they are now. Everyone thought she was really sweet to bring us cookies, but later on that night she accused me of flirting with the female office workers. I could see that she was crazy by this point and tried to break up with her. She threatened to kill herself and, being naive and never having encountered this before , I took her back. This happened a couple more times until I finally got tired of her poo poo and broke it off for good after we had been dating for about 3 months. She grabbed a kitchen knife and threw it at me and then grabbed another one and tried to stab me, screaming in incoherent rage the whole time. Fortunately, my roommates were there and subdued her until she calmed down enough to leave and I never saw her again. 8 months later I got a package in the mail without a return address, but with a postmark from Philly (where she was originally from). I opened it up and there was a Tupperware box in there that contained a rotting fish. Honestly, I wasn't worth all this drama. I was a broke-as-gently caress longhaired dipshit with a lousy job, lovely car, and idiot dreams of indie rock stardom.
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May 1, 2017 17:54
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54 40 or gently caress posted:Uhhh what's a dir** What is "happens?**" Axolotl fucked around with this message at 18:09 on May 1, 2017 |
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May 1, 2017 18:05
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Batterypowered7 posted:You'd thing one of the penises would open up to accept the other penis, rather than just go the butt route. When two gay men have sex...how do they know whose penis will open up to accept the other person's penis?
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May 1, 2017 21:19
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Pick posted:This is actually answered in Storm Constantine's series "Wraethuthu". Wikipedia posted:Wraeththu are true hermaphrodites, possessing both male and female sexual organs and appearing androgynous in general outward appearance. Although they appear superficially as a mix between men and women (no breasts, slim hips, but feminine body structure with no body hair or facial hair), there are numerous physical and mental differences between hara and humans ("We fight like men, and cry like women").
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May 1, 2017 21:25
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Pick posted:If nothing else, the actors definitely know about it because fans were sending death threats to their wives for keeping them apart and forcing them to be straight. Yes really. Trump wants to deport the wrong people. I'd vote for him in 2020 if he gets rid of those shitlords.
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May 1, 2017 21:29
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Trump is a firm Sastiel man Great, now my Google search history is filled with this garbage.
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May 1, 2017 21:42
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Barudak posted:Boyfriend is a complete loving idiot. Never give your kid the name "Wayne"... he'll grow up to be a murderer. http://www.newsoftheweird.com/wayne.html
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May 2, 2017 17:19
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Barudak posted:Good thing its Vanya then. Mind you, you did suggest the dad give the kids the middle names Parker and Wayne.
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May 2, 2017 17:27
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Pick posted:Sounds like a girlfriend for Urban Smurf He'd never find her. He'd just post increasingly deranged theories and Google maps screenshots overlaid with Timecube references on various treasure hunt forums.
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May 2, 2017 18:06
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new phone who dis posted:My middle name is for reals Wayne and I'm composing a list of goons whose skin I want to wear. Reported to the FBI
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May 2, 2017 18:08
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new phone who dis posted:You just made the list. *"Goodbye Horses" playing in the background*
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May 2, 2017 18:11
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A lot of the people I've known who gave a poo poo about their "family name" didn't have much history worth passing on. You live in a double-wide and molested your kids, yeah, let's keep that family legacy going. This guy was a 3rd in his line and named his firstborn the 4th. If you google his son's name, his father's comes up under the sex offender registry. Axolotl fucked around with this message at 18:39 on May 2, 2017 |
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May 2, 2017 18:36
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Kurieg posted:This isn't R/relationships but gently caress. I think of it like rear end-pennies. I can't be absolutely sure, but there's a non-zero chance that any random older guy has been cucked by me in just this fashion and that gives me the upper hand in any negotiations. I also imagine that I have therefore retroactively cucked every man in their family line, making me almost like the Genghis Khan of cuckolding.
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May 4, 2017 04:23
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Barudak posted:well with inertia from the initial jump shed pin them down, yes. She was also a biter, not like sexually just hanging around and shed lean over and give random people a bite, and I without shame or remorse sprayed her in the face with a febreeze bottle once at a party because of it. No medal for you.
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May 4, 2017 20:46
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Pick posted:I've never been a glomper but it is nice to hug someone hard enough that you know if you are transformed into a really big snake whether or not you will be able to unhinge your jaws far enough to consume them whole For all your talk about sex weirds you turn out to be a vore.
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May 4, 2017 20:47
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P-Mack posted:Why you assume is sexual? Is you, you who are the weird. Totally normal. Totally.
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May 4, 2017 21:13
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Improbable Lobster posted:Personally I just give my friends and family a Stone Cold Stunner instead of hugging As long as you don't fantasize about eating them when you do it, you're okay.
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May 4, 2017 21:15
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Nazzadan posted:I (21M) agreed with 21f GF to "save it for marriage. Now I want to start sex before marriage. This guy is desperate to get his dick wet and is gonna wind up miserable when his frigid religion - damaged bride locks up the cookie jar forever.
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May 4, 2017 23:11
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ranbo das posted:Phoenix is a paradise compared to Tucson I'd rather be dead in San Francisco than living anywhere in Arizona.
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May 6, 2017 17:32
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fruit on the bottom posted:Is this question a trap? I feel like this question is a trap. Maybe it's because you used my full username, it's like I'm being scolded. "Achtung! Der ist kein Frachter! Der ist ein Zerstorer! Tauchen, Tauchen! Schnell! Schnell!"
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May 8, 2017 22:15
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WrenP-Complete posted:Yeah, my personal experience has always been the opposite of this reddit story. Like I'll meet a deaf child, sign to them, and the parents will ask me not to sign because they are getting the kid a cochlear implant and they dont want their child to learn sign language. I think they think it will interfere with language development of spoken languages (it doesn't).
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May 9, 2017 15:02
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GRINDCORE MEGGIDO posted:It really is. I wonder if there are other communities that treasure fixable disabilities like that.
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May 9, 2017 15:09
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dudeness posted:I know he isn't cheating, but I can't help feeling he is hiding things from me. Isn't this the Bill Paxton subplot of "True Lies"?
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May 9, 2017 19:50
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Pick posted:Bazooka loves me dearly. Your cat loves whoever feeds it and will eat your face when you die. It won't even wait until it's food bowl is empty.
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May 9, 2017 21:15
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Pick posted:That seems like a really intimate gesture and is probably a way that cats see love. More and more evidence of your vore fetish.
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May 9, 2017 21:15
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La Brea Carpet posted:My wife and I [35 M/F] had a 3 way with my friends wife [35 M/F], not sure what to do now. They're gonna gently caress it.
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May 10, 2017 02:21
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Blue Train posted:This is overdramatic and what everyone says. As long as the guy doesn't know it's fine Eventually one of them, longing for self-destructive drama to liven up their dull lives, will confess to the guy Case in point. VVVVVVVVVVVVVV Axolotl fucked around with this message at 02:30 on May 10, 2017 |
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May 10, 2017 02:28
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fruit on the bottom posted:Don't gently caress squirrels In that tortured metaphor, the squirrel has already been hosed. They just have to decide if they're gonna keep loving it
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May 10, 2017 02:29
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