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docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

triple sulk posted:

yeah, i lived in the midwest and it was the worst

fortunately i found a couple decent pizza places but holy poo poo you cannot get a god drat sandwich without going to subway or jimmy john's

The crappy little Ohio town where I grew up has an amazing sandwich place, and this is probably the only time I will ever compliment that crappy little Ohio town.

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docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Mirthless posted:

the original quote was about the guitar Kurt Russell broke on Hateful Eight, which was totally supposed to be swapped for a replica before it got smashed, but nobody told Kurt Russell that and it was probably what Quentin had planned to do in the first place

There actually was an incident in the Battlestar Galactica revival where Edward James Olmos destroyed a model ship worth hundreds of thousands of dollars that he'd assumed was just a prop.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Is Laura Loomer someone I should know or care about?

Like, sucks that she's such a lovely racist, but who even is she?

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

mrbradlymrmartin posted:

hes still mad about that? :allears: :sad:

His brain has been specially optimized for the eternal retention of grudges to the exclusion of everything else.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Low Desert Punk posted:

If we can convince techbros that guillotines will disrupt something, the uprising would be done yesterday

Yeah, but the guillotines would cost $4,000 each, require a wifi connection, and not work on anyone from silicon valley

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

jerry seinfel posted:

lol WH statement on that bullshit the house passed that would allow group lawsuits against financial institutions that do bullshit (wells fargo, equifax, etc etc)


spin spin spin

The statement went on to say "Also, Obama did this and therefore IT MUST BURN", the traditional conclusion to any Trump statements on legislative action.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Squizzle posted:

nine?!?

hmmmmm

ok

4. a robot must not injure a good dog or allow by inaction a good dog to come to harm, excerpt where this would conflict w the first 3 laws

5. a robot must indulge a good dog who wants playing or a walk, except where it would conflict w the first 4 laws

6. a robot must retrieve frisbees and tennis balls that have escaped a good dogs appropriate playing areas, except where this would conflict w the first 5 laws

7. a robot must not injure a cat or allow a cat to come to harm, except where this would conflict w the first 6 laws

and im stumped for the last 2

8. a robot must not injure any cute mammal, bird, or reptile not mentioned above, or allow such creatures to come to harm, except where this would conflict with the first 7 laws

9. For the purposes of laws 1-8, Nazis are not human beings, good dogs, cats, or cute.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Guy Goodbody posted:

yeah, I like this. I believe this now. It is my life goal to cross the ice to an adjacent earth

HAIL THE GIANT ICE BALL

(Pun not intended, though I wish I had)

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Kazak_Hstan posted:

trump will never top the haters and loser have been hosed up since birth tweet

he peaked in like 2013, sad

Naah, this is the Apotheosis of Trump Twitter:

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/503316125405700096

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Agrajag posted:

btw did trump ever call for the DEATH PENALTY for the old white guy shooting up a bunch of people in Vegas?

Well, he was already dead.

But lol no.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

univbee posted:

Trump's made it enormously difficult if not impossible to be executed legally.

For once, I'm in favor of a thing Trump did.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Trump is playing 11-dimensional chess by establishing precedent for the acquittal of people who cannot possibly get an unbiased jury for their crimes, so that when he's charged with treason...

- Someone, somewhere, is unironically writing this. Trump can't even count to 11, much less think in that many dimensions.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Yinlock posted:

here's how you know it won't happen: mitch and ryan back there looking fuckin miserable

In fairness, they've looked miserable since the start of 2017 and

oh

right

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Addamere posted:

y'all'd'v'e

all y'all'd've

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

logikv9 posted:

I was reading iyg and then the app sent me back here, this poo poo is broken

TMURP

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Addamere posted:

seriously what does all this tax nonsense mean

More Money For Us

gently caress You

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Al! posted:

i actually went straight from landscaping to office work and frankly retail makes working 10 hours in the dirt and hot sun sound like a paradise

Of all the manual labor stuff I did before I fell into office jobs, landscaping at an apartment complex was without question the best by a considerable margin.

(The portion of that job that was cleaning out all the poo poo that spoiled college kids left behind when they abandoned their apartments for the summer was...not as good, but it wasn't dull!)

Actually, delivering/assembling office furniture wasn't bad either.

I haven't done much retail AND I AM NOT SORRY

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

I did a thing posted:

this sounds like it should be illegal. and also, a bullshit excuse to put women in heels.

American labor laws are basically just a man in a suit pointing and laughing at you.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

William Bear posted:

https://twitter.com/mkraju/status/926148724950274049

Is there anything he hasn't implicated himself in by now?

A transcript from the hearing:

SOME REPUBLICAN: So would you say that you were completely innocen-

PAGE: I FAKED THE MOON LANDING

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011


But with it it's a tax cut for Donald Trump, and thus for all Americans (because Donald Trump is the only human being that exists, as far as Donald Trump is concerned).

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

deathbysnusnu posted:

It's just Nunes and Gowdy having him expound on how guilty President Hillary is over the uranium thing and how Trump can totally dunk a basketball for two touchdowns.

He'd still manage to incriminate himself, Trump, and (somehow) Nunes and Gowdy were this the case.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Taintrunner posted:

i got really high before discovering from this thread that trump deleted his twitter

we're all going to die

wait what

WHAT

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011


DEATH PENALTY!

Actually, I'd be fine with them deleting his account and banning him (and the POTUS) account, except then he might find out about the Emergency Broadcast System thing that lets him text everyone in the nation.

(There is no way he knows about it or he'd have used it by now.)

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

sandoz posted:

trump wanting to murder dozens of people without trial is not hilarious even if the results are


america is so loving disgusting

He legit thinks he should be a dictator. That's what today's title is referring to, him literally saying that he should be a dictator.

His eternal frustration at this is beautiful, but the things that gave rise to it are horrifying.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

According to this photograph from one B. Garrison, Donald Trump is 35 years old and built like an Adonis.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011


Oh, hey, they hacked Rubio's OS?

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Joementum posted:

Rubio does this all the time: tells the press what they want to hear to get a favorable story and then votes for the bill anyway

He's a politician, you say?

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

L_Harrison posted:

im surprised that trump hasn't said anything about the antifa supersoldier uprising yet, this seems like big national news

Why do you think he fled the country, er, I'm sorry, went on an official foreign policy trip to Asia?

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

pathetic little tramp posted:

4) Tweet is obvious bullshit from a 4channer with no source spreading bullshit*

*this option does not exist and never will

It does, but selecting it immediately leads to the Twitter account in question getting a blue star.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Chokes McGee posted:

Not that it'd stop him but can he actually do that

There's a hardship exemption to the individual mandate and apparently he's going to classify "being an American in 2017" as a hardship.

Which, you know, fair enough.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Squizzle posted:

whole lotta folks w/o any experience parenting here who seem to have oracular wisdom about how to best parent children

I'm reminded vaguely of the time my coworker, who'd just gotten a kitten for the first time ever, asked me how you trained them to understand bedtime.

I still feel kind of bad about how hard I laughed at her.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011


...hahahahahaha

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Mirthless posted:

it's like they think jesus started the NRA in the bible or something

I'm pretty sure this is literally what some people think that "I come not to bring peace but a sword" verse means.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

WoodrowSkillson posted:

the book of Job essentially contradicts the entire Prosperity Gospel and lack of understanding of it is one of he hallmarks of modern christianity.

Quite a lot of the Bible contradicts the entire Prosperity Gospel, but yeah, Job is kind of the master class there.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

And Greenwald wept, for there were no more anonymous sources to out.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

This Virginia election reminds me of one of my favorite moments in semirecent political history, when George Allen, former VA Governor, would-be VA Senator, all around terrible person, destroyed his own political future by casually referring to someone in the audience by an obscure (at least it was to me) racial slur directed at people from India.

(That he was running against CSPAM Favorite Jim "Murderer" Webb is more or less incidental to the story.)

Of course if that had happened last year he'd have shot up 20 points in the polls and would probably be President now.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

juche avocado posted:

1. his condition of appearing before the committee was that this transcript be made public
2. there is no 2

I feel like it is just possible, and this is only a theory, that Carter Page is not a very intelligent example of the human species, or indeed of any species, such as lichen.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Oh yeah, that's right. Political news can be good sometimes. I'd nearly forgotten what that was like.

docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

zegermans posted:

who could have forseen libertarians being as stupid as they greedy

I mean this has only happened like 5 times already with bitcoin

something something blockchain something something smart contracts something something hahahahahahahahahahaha forever

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docbeard
Jul 19, 2011

Sir Tonk posted:

sure hope everyone remembers to vote today

Look man, I know it was Donald Trump Jr., but seriously, anyone can make a typo. He clearly actually meant that he expected people to vote to die.

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