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The Glumslinger posted:Bitcoin is crashing! Sell! Sell! Sell! Still stands as the greatest goon action ever taken. 
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Mar 30, 2018 17:19
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Where is everyone seeing the $4,700? I’m seeing places claim $4,900, but I’m guessing they’re just reporting numbers to keep from hitting a stone-cold panic.
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Nov 19, 2018 23:11
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revwinnebago posted:I've thought for a long time that $5k seems like the breaking point. Once Bitcoin falls below $5k, it should be Well And Truly Over. I think the only way Bitcoin really dies is if we hit a “frisbee on the roof” scenario where the cost of mining the next coin is significantly more than the margin it brings in from selling it, and people shut off their miners resulting in an impossibly long time between coin mining and transaction processing. Otherwise, yeah we’ll have people pushing pennies across the table and pretending it’s a real currency until like 2099 when some kid with a quantum computer breaks it as part of a middle school science project.
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Nov 20, 2018 17:36
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Lolie posted:We've been making GBS threads on crypto since Bitcoin was worth less than USD 1. What makes you think we'd stop now? The literal first reply to the bitcoin thread in GBS was “Dunning-Krugerrands” wasn’t it?
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Nov 20, 2018 21:52
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gary oldmans diary posted:blockchain is an absolutely garbage database structure for everything that isnt an outright horrible idea to begin with Not to mention the sheer loving waste of energy and spike in emissions it all was. It’s like running 1/100th of the Visa network on backyard, 1960’s-era 2-stroke generators while just burning down a random forest for shits n’ giggles each month. It’s literally the worst possible solution to any question in any way.
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Nov 25, 2018 09:41
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Lemming posted:You can cheat out a disproportionate amount of rewards by finding the next block, not releasing it, then getting a headstart on the next block and waiting until a block is found in the block, then releasing yours and confirming it with your 51% of the pool. You can also hold the entire system hostage and not confirm any blocks with transactions until everyone agrees to pay you tribute. So with 51% of the mining pool, I can become King Turd of poo poo Mountain. Neat!
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Nov 27, 2018 12:24
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AEMINAL posted:Lol for real? Or is it just a cold wallet encrypted at that value? I wouldn’t trust that Trezor to store dick loving poo poo. Hi I’m the company that makes a secure bitcoin device to securely store your bitcoins but I put the private key unencrypted on the device and make it trivial to dump the memory off said device. Thanks and have a great day!
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Nov 28, 2018 17:34
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jokes posted:What kind of retard idiot moron buys bitcoins and then doesn't do anything with them. The possibilities are endless! You also can make enough money to post your mediocre dick online to make people feel owned and buy bitcoins.
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Nov 29, 2018 01:28
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poverty goat posted:right now on ebay Lmao people are paying big bucks for the equivalent of a used car run at redline for several months.
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Dec 1, 2018 16:01
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Ad by Khad posted:even completely offline isnt 100% safe, hello hard drive / device failure If there was a way to prove that the mined coins to date are still accessible by their owners (regardless of how they were gained), I’d wager a bet that it’d be about 20% of the coins out there, max. Weren’t more than half of the coins mined to date done so in the first like 3 weeks the network was up regardless, and the first person to mine (all hail Satoshi) literally has like 25% of the loving coins in existence? I think that most of the people getting into this thing don’t realize how “get rich quick” relies on the first people in gaming the suckers, and that as of today the game is 100% suckers.
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Dec 9, 2018 05:08
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Coming back to this thread after a long-rear end time because I read the article about the SquidCoin being a humungous scam that was uncritically boosted by media conglomerates looking for something to talk about, and now I'm learning about NFTs and how someone claiming ownership of a crudely drawn picture of a monkey is calling the FBI over the fact that he was scammed out of his digital receipt for said monkey drawing. How the ever-living gently caress do these idiots have the money to do this poo poo? These people are eating-paste stupid and yet they have thousands to throw around on scams. I knew I was a failure as a human being, but goddamn I never knew I sucked that bad that I can't make enough money to literally throw my savings away on scams and shrug it off.
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Nov 1, 2021 16:01
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punishedkissinger posted:it's not dumb to be upset by this. it's naked greed and nothing more. it sucks to see people buying into a pyramid scheme which will greatly exacerbate global warming and leave a shitload of people with nothing. anyone knowingly participating in that is a huge piece of poo poo unfortunately. It'd be one thing if these dickheads would be using solar energy or some sort of renewables to generate their crypto crap (albeit wasteful but the bar is so low for humanity I'd count it as a win), but we all know these assholes are buying the cheapest forms of energy they can meaning they're just sucking down the kWh from their local electrical provider, which is more than likely coal. So they're killing the environment for digital pogs that claim they own a picture of Sonic the Hedgehog's rancid feet while a smarter sonic sex fetishist just hits the "PRNT SCN" button and beats off to the same image for free. I swear to God, aliens/cockroaches that outlast humanity, if you manage to read this make sure to burn any remnants of humanity from the universe because we're the loving worst thing that Chaos Theory ever shat out.
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Nov 2, 2021 13:32
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Juul-Whip posted:you could just get a job Excuse me, getting poo poo-faced at the craps table and gambling my mortgage is a job.
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Nov 2, 2021 20:52
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Shinmera posted:The reason crypto and NFTs work is the same reason Spam emails work. They're specifically engineered to be dumb as gently caress, to weed out anyone smart and only leave the stupid and vulnerable people that would actually fall for the scam without repercussion for the scammer. Looking at the population of the United States, it really is no surprise that crypto is super popular here. We're chock-full of rich morons. Also that monkey jizz scam is like watching a man walk on a pile of twigs over top of a tiger pit, believing it safe because the rear end in a top hat who made it told him it was. "The Vice Article posted:Monkey Jizz’s scam was a rug pull, in which a project attracts investors, promises to release a bunch of products, and then suddenly makes off with investor funds while crashing the value of the underlying token. According to screenshots shared on social media on Sunday, Monkey Jizz’s rug pull also had the added step of introducing a 94.9 percent sell fee for any holders of $MJIZZ, disincentivizing any panic selling that might diminish the rug pull’s profitability. If the fuckin' devs have the ability to arbitrarily set punitive measures on things like "selling", you probably shouldn't have touched it! Also I can't wait for these coiners to ruin some random dude's life after it becomes apparent that the scammers just lifted "Cal" off of some random Facebook page or that ai-generated face site. Be your own bank!
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Nov 3, 2021 12:38
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If that henpai thing is shitposting to make fun of NFTs it's pretty funny, but if it's in any way serious I'm going to join Elon Musk's slave corps on Mars just to get away from these people.
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Nov 3, 2021 15:54
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Web 1.0: “eww what’s that man doing to his anus?” Web 2.0: “eww why is that man stretching his anus on my Facebook page?” Web 3.0: “what’s that man doing to his anus and why is this perverted little creep messaging me and telling me I owe him $15 for looking at it?”
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Nov 3, 2021 23:54
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JammyB posted:https://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2021-11-04-ea-says-nfts-will-be-an-important-part-about-the-future-of-our-industry This screams “we are running out of money and are slapping buzzwords in our press releases to see if we can drum up some rubes to boost our stock price”. This is just like the company I worked for that was owned by a venture capital fund: when the idiot owners (who were a bunch of dumb-poo poo rich people) would come for their meetings, the bosses would spam bullshit about “leveraging A.I. to help us meet strategic objectives” in the presentations. Not a soul in the company had a clue what A.I. is let alone how to use it, but it sure made the rich people feel good. The rich people then would tell management to cut jobs and produce more product to make them more money, and the company ended up getting run into the ground as they were denied any funds for automation but somehow thought they could buy some human slaves to work in a lab environment. Venture capitalists are insanely stupid people.
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Nov 4, 2021 22:39
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Raygereio posted:How realistic is the theory that the financial regulatory agencies aren't slapping crypto down because they're too scared what else is going to fall over when the crypto bubble bursts? I think they aren’t slapping it down because most of the people in said regulatory agencies have people older than dirt as their bosses, and the bosses aren’t prioritizing something they literally lack the knowledge to understand. It’s hard to get an old fart in Congress to care or understand that poor people are getting fleeced while he has a few Goldman Sachs lobbyists pouring money down his pants.
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Nov 5, 2021 16:14
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So close, and yet so, so far. One day they may get it, let’s hope it’s before the earth boils over. 
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Nov 5, 2021 18:54
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I was reading about NFTs trying to figure out how you "link" your ownership of a particular image or video or whatever, and boy howdy do these scammers really work hard to obfuscate how the sausage is made. Lots of platitudes about how "this gives you ownership!" and other worthless crap about how it's not really that bad for the environment, green energy will save us, etc. but absolutely nothing linking how they would link the etherium address to the image. Are the images hashed and that's what's loaded to the blockchain? The full image? What prevents me from changing a random pixel with a value of #06A89D to #05A89D and uploading it as the original? If I didn't care about the environment and the future of humanity, I might be tempted to get that stupid picture of the monkey that nerd owned, change one pixel, then upload it and claim it is the original to gently caress with them. Then again, that'd require me owning Etherium and I'm a knuckle-dragging idiot loser accountant and even I'm not that stupid.
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Nov 5, 2021 20:39
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punishedkissinger posted:the image is not encoded, just a url linking to a site hosting it Oh cool, now I see why they refuse to tell you how any of this works. It’s 1,000 times stupider than I ever could imagine.
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Nov 5, 2021 21:09
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Can’t wait until one of those NFT repository sites gets owned via basic sql-injection and someone replaces all the links to that .gif of the dude doing a flip while taking a poo poo. The world may be burning but I’ll have a hearty laugh.
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Nov 5, 2021 22:30
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Main Paineframe posted:the people getting talked into making NFTs are getting fleeced too When I learned that you need to buy the crypto to make an NFT, the scam finally made complete sense. As other posters mentioned, the NFT evangelists don’t give a crap about the NFTs (even going as far as just attaching loving Hyperlinks as proof of ownership of an image Jesus Christ), they’re just looking to sell their emissions pogs to other people as a means of cashing out. Even if this wasn’t a mess for the environment and energy usage, and it was free to create NFTs, the drat thing falls apart once you realize that someone else can screenshot your “owned” image and create an NFT for ownership of the same exact image at a different Hyperlink, then sell or license that work for less money. If I’m corpo-shitpants and some dude has a picture of a cartoon monkey eating rear end and wants to license it for $500, what’s preventing me from screen-shotting it, changing two or three colors or reversing the image, and just licensing it to myself for free?
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Nov 6, 2021 22:47
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:monkey jizz really isn't all that expensive tho you just gotta know a guy You gotta make sure it’s legit though and not cut with ape jizz, they do that.
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Nov 7, 2021 16:29
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Salt Fish posted:"You guys said X was awful, but look at X now! It's everywhere"" “You guys said monkey jizz was awful, but look at monkey jizz now! It’s everywhere!”  i can’t tell if this is a good thing, help
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Nov 7, 2021 23:24
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Alan Smithee posted:none of you bitches who run into these threads out of breath ever flex cash so why should we believe a thing you say You'd think that with this insanely popular currency of the future that exchanges to USD wouldn't be necessary, but yeah, lots of big talk from these folks and "there are hundreds of bitcoin-funded businesses" but very little proof that any of this poo poo is real. Also I filtered my local CL ads to "cryptocurrency ok" to see what items people are willing to sell for the currency/investment of the future, and uh...  https://i.imgur.com/VuUkBtf.png if you work in a nunnery and can't see a woman posing in her underwear she intends on selling.used sport aviation magazines, some crappy quads, crypto-bro equipment and used women's clothing for masturbation purposes. Really hitting it out of the park there, crypto-bros. funeral home DJ fucked around with this message at 14:52 on Nov 8, 2021 |
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Nov 8, 2021 14:49
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Alan Smithee posted:"checkmate loser, it's all for masturbation purposes" drat, I'm been owned  small butter posted:You fool! Didn't I loving tell you to put it all on 17 at the roulette wheel! Sure got you losers, I went to this casino and bought $1k of chips and now I'm living large as my gambling has resulted in my chips being worth $250k! Don't mind the cashier's window being "permanently closed" and the new clients buying in by purchasing chips from the other clients sprinting for the door, this is all legit!
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Nov 8, 2021 17:31
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My first thought when companies start talking up blockchains and NFTs is “uh oh, looks like someone’s in dire straits and is looking for some gullible venture capital.” So what’s the over/under for Discord filing for bankruptcy? 6, 7 months?
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Nov 9, 2021 04:08
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Hillary 2024 posted:I found this in a mall in Melbourne in 2014. No idea how long it lasted, I was only there for a few days. We have one of those in a tobacco/snack shop down the road but it’s very explicitly “buy here” with absolutely zero ability to sell or cash out your coins in any way. Thankfully I’ve never seen anyone even touch the thing and I’m wondering if it has a fine layer of dust on it by now.
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Nov 10, 2021 00:26
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Mega Comrade posted:The first lawsuit involving NFTs is gonna be wild. Transcripts of lawyers struggling to explain it to judges. Be almost as good as that wolf porn legal case. The transcripts are going to be Star-Trek-esque technobabble interspersed with "Explain to the jury" and "Can you repeat that" about every 3 or 4 lines, before a Freeman-On-The-Land claim is made at the last minute. It'll fuckin' rule.
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Nov 12, 2021 17:05
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Regarde Aduck posted:The worst people in the world keep on winning Tech people and robber barons are the same, imo: two groups of filthy rich people who don’t give a gently caress that history will portray them as assholes. Actually, that’s pretty much the history of capitalism and dictatorships on this rotten crap Earth, so yeah.
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Nov 13, 2021 07:05
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We’re gonna have a raid on the 401(k)s of America here real soon and get a litmus test on how much the average schmuck really loves capitalism. Something tells me we won’t be a country after that sort of crash.
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Nov 13, 2021 17:07
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“Hey, this website made for scamming people out of money has terrible customer service!” - very smart crypto investor people Also lol that these rubes keep doing the “we made $X million USD from fees”, fuckin’ cash it out and flex it you losers. I don’t want to hear what you could potentially make if you could sell your emissions pogs at top dollar, show us what you got.
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Nov 14, 2021 14:50
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Whoever the goon was that pointed out that, in theory, you could have two NFTs pointed at the same target URL, you fuckin’ nailed it my friend. https://twitter.com/NFTtheft/status/1460688714129035270?s=20 To summarize the article: 1) Some dipshit coiner(s) makes another dumb ape “project” (baby ape no I’m not kidding)for money laundering purposes. 2) 3 days later, another scammer buys another NFT project, gives it an identical “baby ape” name and points the Opensea url to the same loving image. Opensea just takes the money and runs with it without a care. 3) idiot coiners see that the baby apes are a great 4) scammers make off with loads of etherium from the other scammers Holy gently caress, this is the dumbest thing.
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Nov 17, 2021 16:11
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Random Stranger posted:A lot of sports arenas have been renamed when their naming sponsor suddenly went bankrupt. Almost as if paying for you name on a stadium is a bad idea. The Pittsburgh Penguins’ “Consol Arena” was named after a coal company that went bust after a few years, which is still loving hilarious. Imagine being in a coal company and thinking not only that coal will go on forever but that you’ve got money to burn strapping your name on an arena. Fools and their money, etc. etc.
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Nov 17, 2021 16:18
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JammyB posted:Good article here about the failed Constitution"DAO" and more detail on the losses for their backers. This is especially hilarious because I remember in the very first Bitcoin thread in GBS (followed by the legendary first reply of “Dunning-Krugerrands”), the dweeb mentioned “no fees” as an advantage of bitcoin and crypto in general. Yet here we are, a decade or so later, and fees are literally so high that it’s impossible to move money without losing it all if you request a refund. This is some wild poo poo, I’ll tell ya.
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Nov 25, 2021 04:31
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Bitcoin and Metallica, two great wastes that waste great together.
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Nov 28, 2021 00:30
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vortmax posted:Atlas Shrugged is a lovely science fiction novel  BTAF still shines on decades later as the best take on Atlas Shrugged. Also Ayn Rand wouldn't have given two shits about NFTs in her later years she was too busy living on socialist welfare policies to care
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Nov 30, 2021 20:14
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Durzel posted:NFTs feel to me like crypto madness squared. I can't even begin to explain them in any meaningful way. As remarked earlier the English language feels oddly incapable of explaining what or why it is. It’s tulip mania but with layers of complexity added to obfuscate that it’s tulip mania. Also I was learning how virus payloads for computers work and how programmers hide malicious code within strings of hex, then “confuse” antivirus software by having the computer make nonsensical calculations while changing the hex back into ascii format for compiling. The malicious code is then compiled and run 5 layers deep, and goddamn does that make a good allegory for how bitcoin and overall scamming works in 2021. Do the same poo poo grandpa did, just add layers on top to trick people.
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Dec 10, 2021 16:02
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If I weren't dumb as a post I'd be trying to make one of those websites where you can enter data and have it create a cease-and-desist order for a given image used as an NFT, and make it so it takes no more than 30 minutes to sue OpenSeas or whatever over an entire portfolio. A long time ago I remember someone making a website that did something like that for telemarketing scams or something along those lines, and boy howdy, do we need that today. Imagine what would happen if those NFT congregation sites got hundreds or thousands of cease-and-desists a day, it'd be fuckin' glorious. 
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Dec 13, 2021 17:34
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