purple death ray posted:

its kind of like how we can laugh at britain being 'knifecrime island' while in america we are designing our schools into counterstrike maps rather than curtail firearms in any way. we're consistently dumb and hypocritical is what I am saying

food court bailiff posted:

Scott Adams is a moron for a lot of reasons and he does hold a lot of genuinely stupid beliefs but I'll still never get sick of goons tripping over themselves to prove that they don't understand what a thought experiment is and claim stuff like "dilbert man doesn't believe in gravity LOL".

Vasudus posted:

got into a low intensity pissing contest today with the six shop

they were trying very hard to get me to sign for 10k of GFE without physically inspecting it, because i was remote today

the E7 that was the main point of contact suffered from terminal army brain and did not cope with my defiance very well

they escalated it to an O5 that finally called me right before they left for the day and i put the fear of god in them

fin

McNally posted:

Who the gently caress buys 10k worth of girlfriend experience prostitutes

Dick Burglar posted:

madeintaipei posted:

Hedenius posted:

https://twitter.com/ztpetrizzo/status/1205533927286476801

Uranium posted:

“This sham trial is the sort of thing you’d find in a banana republic, I’d know,”

Krankenstyle posted:

the therapeutical index i think its called is different from tolerance.

Platystemon posted:

https://twitter.com/sarahmei/status/1078932447314595840

Platystemon posted:

https://twitter.com/sarahmei/status/1079021881498320896

She explicitly rejects prosthetic limbs.

What is the “negative space” there? Victims of piracy who would have been spared had the peg leg not existed?

A Man With A Plan posted:

Oscar Pistorius' girlfriend?

Ugly In The Morning posted:

I’m pretty sure this is the first time in ten years I was quoted in the quotes thread in a “not teeing someone up” context and it feels weirdly good.

Burt Sexual posted:

Yeah? Well I’ve been quoted dozens, maybe hundreds, of times.

theflyingorc posted:

does anyone have the quote about orangutans/gorillas/chimps, about if you drop a screwdriver into their enclosure? the guy was quoting his girlfriend who is a vet

Syd Midnight posted:

ya, dunno who wrote it tho

quote:

My girlfriend is a zookeeper, and her zoo's primate department rule of thumb about the great apes is that if you leave say, a screwdriver on a gorilla paddock, they'll pick it up, play with it a bit, see what it tastes like, and then probably drop it. The chimps will pick it up, taste it, and then use it as a weapon during a murderous blood rage against anything in the immediate area that isn't also a chimp. The orangutans will pick it up, carefully conceal it, and while nobody is looking, use it to build a multistage rocket to return to their homeworld.

Sagebrush posted:

there's a good quote (maybe in this thread!) from a primate researcher who's like

"The main difference between the primates is how they handle a screwdriver you accidentally leave in their enclosure.

A gorilla will look at the screwdriver, sniff it, pick it up, put it back down and ignore it from then on.

A chimpanzee will pick up the screwdriver, turn it over, play with it a bit, then use it to murder a small animal or another chimp.

An orangutan will pointedly ignore the screwdriver until it thinks you aren't watching, then pick it up and hide it in a secret location, and later use it to build a spaceship to return to its home planet."

Probably Magic posted:

A few months ago I told C-SPAM I was not alt-right. My heart and my best intentions still tell me that's true, but the facts and the evidence tell me it is not. As the Tower board reported, what began as a strategic opening to alt-right discord deteriorated, in its implementation, into me posting Nazi poo poo. This runs counter to my own beliefs, to administration policy, and to the original strategy we had in mind.

ArfJason posted:

ppj making the proper german hand sign for the number 3 and ultimately befriending hans landa and having a great time lol

purple death ray posted:

Thanks, it's exactly as stupid as I thought it was. Anybody got the discord screenshots?

space uncle posted:

I can barely tell what’s going on also but from some of the threads quoted above:
1. There’s an off-site discord full of Nazi goons that are harassing non-Nazi goons.
2. The mods/admins tactically infiltrated the discord by sending moderator PPJ, artfully disguised under the assumed name “PPJ” to gain the trust of the Nazis by posting nazi memes and permabanning leftist C-spam posters.
3. C-Spam posters said “what the gently caress”
4. The whole operation is revealed.
5. The covert ops team is furious that their deep cover source got burned.

Summary: We must be careful what we pretend to be, because we are what we pretend to be.

Solice Kirsk posted:

Who the hell is PPJ?

oldpainless posted:

Fine fine I’ll do it

Malachite_Dragon posted:

I'm told elsewhere that the Nazi fucks also knew the entire time and were just feeding him bullshit all along, but who knows how true that is

Capri Sun Tzu posted:

Hey Jones. We knew who you were when you joined, we just posted with you in good faith because that's how we do.

Here's your discord ID posts over time friend. Since you joined our discord you posted way more frequently here than in any of your own discords, or on SA. I'm sure all of it it was just because you were pulling one over on us CHUDS, but in that time you had a lot to say.


It probably would surprise you that some of your fellow WTT posters were gay/trans (and nobody cares its just posting dude), but the funniest thing is when people started accusing us of deleting your posts, when you were the one deleting them, and full backups of the things you tried to erase remain online.

Anyone who makes off jokes is a literal Nazi, anyone who says the Bad Words is a nazi is hitler etc so throw me under the bus already to satisfy people who have, in the immortal words of Infrateal, "clearcut their own junk, reduced to prowling public showerdrains for clotted pube whorls, a shaker of sea salt in one hand and chopsticks in the other."

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

Captain Monkey posted:

The only good gimmicks have been cumshitter, oldgimmickless, and tobleronetriangular.

Fight me.

jesus WEP posted:

maybe people should do that old joke less

meat sweats posted:

two things I was promised as a child in the early 90s that we don't have:

"a machine that can make it sound like any singer is singing any song. you can make frank sinatra sing michael jackson songs!" yeah you could probably do something close to this in audio software now but 1) why would you want to 2) what's the difference between doing that and just hiring a vocal impersonator 3) why did the person presenting on incredible developing technology to my fourth grade class think this was going to be the technology that defined The Future?

"a small cube in a room-sized cooling system that can replace all known military strategists" which an algebra teacher who used to be in the air force insisted already existed in secret

Achmed Jones posted:

six-sided dice already exists

Son of Thunderbeast posted:

I went and checked out of curiosity, and someone got their "change my username to this" wish granted lmao

Outrail posted:

Can you explain this for the non trekie/furniture candle enthusiasts?

Splicer posted:

Attempting the chair sitting maneuver he is well known for would set his genitals on fire. Many people do not like having their genitals set on fire due to the associated pain and injury. The joke presumes Riker/Frakes also does not want to have his genitals set on fire. The gif shows Riker/Frakes running away. In context, it is implied he is running away from the chair. It is implied he is running away because he is scared that should he swing his legs over the chair he will be injured as described above. The humour comes from the piecing together of disparate pieces of information and cultural references to reach an unexpected conclusion and is enhanced by the exaggerated nature of the depicted response.

Son of Sam-I-Am posted:

i dont get it

Elviscat posted:

He isn't running after the other crew member, he's observing an anomalous/dangerous situation unfolding onboard the Enterprise, that requires a rapid retirement from the area, as the ship's Executive Officer Riker is the second-highest ranking member of the crew after the Captain, and often in charge of on-scene damage control, because of his position he likely feels morally and ethically obligated to ensure the safety of the crewmember in yellow (a junior engineering rating) so he's warning the crewmember of the dangerous/anomalous situation developing behind them, which the junior person had not yet observed, and encouraging them to flee as well. A more junior officer might not feel the same obligation, and might ignore his fellow crewmember or say something like "don't worry about why I'm running away, everything is normal.

Obviously the anomalous/dangerous situation is implied to be the chair that poses a unique risk to Riker's genitals, therefore it's even funnier that he would importune another crew member to flee with him, when the chair presumably poses no risk to said crewmember's genitalia.

Mr. Nice! posted:

once you get under 1% you just use basis points.

animist posted:

the BAC increased 3 points today, stirring fears of a lapsed recovery after a shaky summer

Bust Rodd posted:

Forum: RSF Subforum

Issue: I was autobanned and do not understand why, cannot contact or PM anyone about it, and unbanning my account removed all my upgrades

Explanation - 3 days ago I was attempting to post a Mark Hamill is cool thread in the Star Wars Subforum and the thread I started was instantly gas chambered and I was autobanned by Radium. My Rap Sheet just says "Breaking the rules with a loving awesome thread" but I have reread the Star Wars forum rules and don't understand what rule I broke. I have restored my account with another $10 and cannot figure out what happened or why I was banned. When I went to ask about it, Radium has no contact info and the two admins listed (Garbage Day and Doc evil) did not respond. The thread did not seem any lower content than the existing "Adam Driver" thread and contained no bad words or uncomfortable language I have also discovered that despite paying for reactivating my account, I have lost all my forums account upgrades and cannot send PMs.

I would please like to know A) why was I banned and for what reason so I know not to do it again and B) why does it say that Reactivating my account with "Fully Restore it" when I've lost all the stuff I've purchased over the years to support SA and Lowtax. I had No Ads, Platinum, and Archives upgrades but Archives is the only one still active, Platinum and No Ads have been deactivated and I lost my Avatar.

In the decade+ that I've been posting here I've never been banned and whenever I've been probed for non-joke reasons I take those punishments to heart and don't post those words and if people are upset with the way that I post I do tend to go back and edit out mean or vitriolic responses. Please help me understand why I was banned and how to prevent it in the future, and please either restore my Avatar and paid upgrades or explain to me why Archives was restored but my other upgrades were not.

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

I mean, it's worth giving a shot. Nobody post anything that isn't a quote of someone else's good post.

twoday posted:

this might be a bit too dark

Cybernetic Vermin posted:

Not that dark as such, but harping on and on about Epstein is such a popular nazi pasttime that I don't think it'll stay funny for all that long.

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Are you lurking in nazi spaces and seeing this? Might have a job for you...

Plastik posted:

quote:

Just put your own contribution to the thread in quotes so that that happens automatically.

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

Repudiate?

LITERALLY A BIRD posted:

Platystemon, you would not judge me for getting lazy on that gradient had you seen me spend an hour editing the A in APPEND pixel by pixel to try to match the non-homebrew letters

Screaming Idiot posted:

Make the quote button say "Quote" and the post button say "Post," because that would be extremely funny and hilarious.