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In the ninth grade, one of my close friends told her boyfriend that I was her cousin so he wouldn't be suspicious of all the time we spent alone. Sophie is not his cousin. She's also not a lesbian. Also isn't the point of being fwb that you're just friends that gently caress. Why are you friends with benefits with somebody who isn't benefiting you.
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Sep 27, 2016 22:59
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How far in do you have to be to need your wedding guests to know you're about to get cucked to get off?
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Sep 27, 2016 23:23
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loquacius posted:Good for her for getting sober, but it seems a little odd to me that telling her dad about it wouldn't be part of the program I'm willing to be they've had "you're going down a bad road!" fights in the past and she didn't want him to feel like he was right and get all "I told you so." It's why some of my family has no idea I'm a recovering/recovered alcoholic. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 23:25 on Sep 30, 2016 |
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Sep 30, 2016 23:17
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dookifex_maximus posted:all right calm down everybody im lampooning trends and traits present in the human population, i don't think all 3.5 billion and change women in the world are this way please don't
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Oct 1, 2016 23:01
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There's a few positions that I wouldn't have thought of on my own that I saw in porn that my wife and I like to do but outside of that, it taught me nothing other than "penis goes in hole and sometimes nipples feel good." It certainly didn't set me up for disappointment though. Not sure how you can be online enough to watch porn as a teenager but not read the millions of people telling you porn isn't real.
flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 20:25 on Oct 2, 2016 |
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Oct 2, 2016 20:02
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It's weird how you can spend two decades online and rarely see anything that disturbs you but then you read something like the "go prep the bull" story and you feel nauseated.
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Oct 3, 2016 18:09
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sucked my twin off posted:My [23f] new bf [27m] of 3 months is either a disney character, crazy, or a liar. (guy with an eagle in his house) If I was her, my biggest issue would be how to convince him to marry him. That guy is loving cool.
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Oct 7, 2016 21:11
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Leon Einstein posted:Some of you will believe anything. Some of us are enjoying the thread for what it is and not playing detective.
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Oct 7, 2016 22:57
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HardDiskD posted:My [30F] friend [31F] frequents a business but I overheard the employees saying bad things about her. Should I tell her? tbh I think most employees in any kind of customer service industry get through the day by mocking the poo poo out of the customers, especially regulars, once they leave. If you aren't greeted like a king every time you walk through the door and haven't formed a personal relationship with each employee, they're talking poo poo about you.
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Oct 15, 2016 19:53
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Captain Lavender posted:My boyfriend [24 M] pranked me in a horrible way and I [20 F] broke it off with him. He wants to work through it and I’m worried I’ve made the wrong decision. Who’s right here? I can't handle spiders. I've maintained my composure in situations where I honestly believed I was going to die (my brother and his friends had what they thought was a hilarious prank involving a ski mask, a spray painted airsoft gun, and me) but passed out at work when a daddy long legs/harvestman crawled onto my shoulder. Oddly enough, my fear of daddy long legs instantly disappeared when I found out they aren't actual spiders.
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Oct 16, 2016 14:21
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She's a terrible person and probably wouldn't feel guilty if she would just own and accept it. I feel like a lot of "guilty people" are actually just trying to reconcile their heartless actions with the way they perceive themselves. I am dumb and don't know anything though.
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Oct 16, 2016 17:33
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gaslight her until she's convinced she's dumb and forgetful.
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Oct 16, 2016 17:48
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mind the walrus posted:I feel bad for the girl. When I was a teenager I had a superiority/inferiority complex about my intellect and got the ever-loving poo poo kicked out of me, rightfully so. It looks like this woman is going through something similar. No matter what form it takes the hammer is going to drop on her very hard and absolutely no one is going to have any sympathy. I had a friend like that in high school. Anytime somebody appeared smarter than him, got a higher grade, did better on the ACT, etc., he would have to justify it to everyone and make sure everyone knew the multitude of reasons why he wasn't the best. She got the scholarship because her mom knows the chancellor/his dad is a history teacher and helped him study but I had to study alone/she must have graded it wrong. What was funny is that he wasn't unusually smart either. He had a high GPA in high school and college but he couldn't necessarily apply it to real life situations. Worldshatter posted:I fell into that same trap too. When you're like 14-15 and a bunch of tests from the magic science men tell you you're in some top percentile of the population it's easy to start believing in your own superiority. And the only real cure for it is for everyone around you to drop your ego-inflated rear end like the dead weight it is. It absolutely sucks at the time because of course you're just oh so smart and all the normal apes around you will never understand but you come out a better person at the other end. I was the opposite. School testing and teachers taught me that I was naturally dumb as gently caress and bound to fail at anything that required mental skills. I got older and realized that the teachers were bitter and the classes were just boring. Those two above statements made for a real fun time when I made a higher score than him on the ACT. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 19:23 on Oct 16, 2016 |
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Oct 16, 2016 19:18
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"Submitted by trashwoman444" Well, we've discovered every possible fetish. We're going to have to start mixing them together.
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Oct 16, 2016 20:17
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Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:there's a good one in r/legaladvice I'm desperately hoping that was typed with one hand and not genuine. I can't handle it if it is. Reminds me of the rape from Scandal though.
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Oct 21, 2016 00:09
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quote:I [20F] just found that my friend's [20F] parents [40s F/M] warned my boyfriend's [23M] parents [60s M/F] about me when we started dating. Pretty sure this is just as effective as spoiler tags as far as keeping me from knowing the ages involved. It's like a loving puzzle.
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Oct 22, 2016 23:30
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how can assman be that goddamn stupid? "haha I love titty loving. too bad you're flat as a board! love you, babe!"
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Oct 22, 2016 23:52
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how broken do you have to be to think that having a problem with your partner loving OTHER PEOPLE is abnormal or something to be confused about.
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Oct 23, 2016 23:30
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HardDiskD posted:My [25/F] fiancé's [28/M] brother [25/M] drunk dialed me saying he's in love with me. This is a bad idea but a legitimate post: poo poo your pants before you talk to him. The smell will shatter his "she's perfect" view of you. If he asks, tell him that you have food poisoning. I imagine he's obsessed and not "in love" and this will take care of that. He'll justify it as normal in his head to avoid seeing his sister-in-law that way but the damage to his feelings will be done.
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Oct 24, 2016 18:09
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loquacius posted:Yeah I'd bet good money that if you asked Mark from Nissin Cup Nudist's post whether he actually thought that joke was funny or was just really uncomfortable and laughed because it was easier than raising a stink, you wouldn't get a response because imaginary people can't talk wait until the tumblr otherkin community hears about this
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Oct 24, 2016 22:26
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Lunchmeat Larry posted:I had depression at that age and my parents brushed it off and downplayed it as well - with only a half-hearted apology about ten years later for getting it wrong when they realised I still have it - it loving sucks so I have to empathise with the kid here. I internalised the idea that I probably was just an angsty teenager and any doctor/therapist would laugh me away so I never got the help I needed. My parents were the opposite which was frustrating but still not as bad as your situation. If I showed any negative emotion, even for a valid reason, they'd demand to know if I was depressed, try to get me to admit it, and try to persuade me to go to an emergency appointment with my psychiatrist. I could yawn and be interrogated about why I wasn't sleeping and if it was related to being depressed. It wasn't unusual for me to be accused of lying about it and told that I needed to tell them the truth. It was very frustrating to feel like mommy and daddy had to babysit their baby boy's feelings. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 19:10 on Oct 29, 2016 |
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Oct 29, 2016 18:54
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batman costume guy posted:For two years I asked to see it. But she would always tell me "someday" or deflect the conversation. I looked in the closet. Nothing. Hmm, who is crazier. The girl who made up a dumb lie and didn't know how to come clean about it, or the guy who spent two years obsessing over a batman costume instead of picking up on it being a lie.
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Oct 29, 2016 21:21
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A rare gender reversed open marriage gone cuck story
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Oct 30, 2016 00:36
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Pick posted:that would never happen if you were white lol 10 bucks says whoever gave you that red text is an active MRA subreddit poster
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Oct 30, 2016 20:57
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Who in their right mind wouldn't be bothered by their S/O being sexually obsessed with a mutual friend? I say obsessed because, well, that's obsessive.
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Oct 31, 2016 17:27
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I caught my loving creep of a wife watching netflix in bed while crossdressing in one of my old comfy t-shirts. How do I break up with her, something awful?
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Nov 1, 2016 23:26
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Battle Royale Baby posted:It depends. What is your wife watching on netflix? She had been watching Stranger Things but switched to Friends because it was freaking her out.
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Nov 1, 2016 23:33
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tell her you cheated and got herpes? e: from a guy
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Nov 1, 2016 23:50
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Anyone who would be concerned with her privacy or safety in that situation is a broken human being or should be nominated for sainthood.
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Nov 2, 2016 23:52
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The idea of freezing up while a drunk guy grabs my wife makes me feel like throwing up. tbh I'd feel like killing myself if I was that guy
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Nov 6, 2016 20:23
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At the bare minimum she's jerked your dog off. The bare minimum.
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Nov 6, 2016 21:36
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bone app the teeth posted:there are these things called "lies" that are sometimes ok to say because they don't hurt anyone and can actually help people feel better "It was too big and it hurt." "It was big but he was a three stroke joke." "Big as in long, yeah, but it was narrow as gently caress." There are hundreds of lies you can tell to avoid feeding your partner's insecurities. In an ideal world, they wouldn't be insecure about anything and you could just say "Yes I liked his thick, hard, pulsing horse cock" but that's not how it works.
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Nov 12, 2016 18:04
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Marijuana Nihilist posted:must suck having family members who support trump My wife and I are the only non-trump supporters in my family. Immediate and extended. I'd say about half are genuinely racist and the other half have just bought into the fear and lies about the evil terrorist refugee. Doctor J Off posted:I don't know who this guy is but he sure seems to know a lot about me! If I wasn't married, I think I'd back out of any relationship where there's "just a friend". I've been in all three positions in that scenario and it turned into drama and heartbreak every time. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 15:41 on Nov 20, 2016 |
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Nov 20, 2016 15:23
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loquacius posted:I wonder how reliable the part that said the sister wanted to abort the baby anyway was, because that is a key point I can't possibly know since I'm incapable of getting pregnant as I have a penist but I would imagine miscarriage could be a traumatic experience and feel like you lost your baby even if you wanted an abortion.
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Nov 26, 2016 17:52
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Chichevache posted:The baby isn't lost, dummy, it's dead. I was talking about the poor cat, you breeder scum (I wasn't) Ratjaculation posted:Epilepsy comes in all different shapes and sizes. My understanding is some people are born with it but anyone can develop epilepsy from anything to a small bump to the head to a heart attack. My uncle had bad epilepsy. He was talking in class so the teacher grabbed his head and slammed it into the desk. I think he was like ten at the time and it was the 60s. His biological family put him up for adoption because of it.
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Nov 26, 2016 18:12
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almightyerin posted:According to op in the comments, they're badgering the guy for his bank info so they can check his transactions and are trying to buy a house near theirs. I'm going to reread it to make sure I understand the situation but if the guy occasionally yells at them for it, it seems like he hates it as well but just puts up with it for a peaceful visit. I don't think it would take much of a push to convince him it's unhealthy if his gf tells him it isn't peaceful at all for her. I mean, if they're that crazy, I'm not shocked he's just given in for the sake of having a relationship with them. edit: nvm. After reading more comments it sounds like she's actually going to get murdered. also can't you do DNA tests with a hair off a brush or is that just in the movies? the boyfriend should do that because there's a 100% chance he was stolen from the hospital flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 15:40 on Nov 27, 2016 |
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Nov 27, 2016 15:34
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Tom Gorman posted:In my opinion as an old dude, video games are a goddamn menace to relationships. I'll just say that. If she seems like she doesn't care that you're playing Dark Souls for 6 hours, she really does but isn't at the point where it has become frustrating yet. Or maybe she doesn't give a poo poo, in which case, good on you. But be sure before you assume that. Sometimes a game can be the thing that couples can do together and enjoy their free time. But most commonly, it isn't. Spending time together is important, and 6 hours is a hell of a long stretch of time to spend in a computer cave if you have a job and a relationship. It may seem counter intuitive but bringing my xbox and gaming chair into our bedroom helped my wife and I out with this. Even though we're doing completely different things, just being in the same room is still spending time together because we can still talk, laugh, etc. I do use a headset but try to reserve it for when she's asleep or heavily invested in something. I wasn't heavily obsessed with video games or anything. It was just frustrating that the room our interests took place in rarely aligned. Granted, this relies heavily on my wife being able to go to sleep regardless of light or noise but whatever. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 01:26 on Dec 7, 2016 |
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Dec 7, 2016 01:24
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54 40 or gently caress posted:I'm so bolding the best part of this r/childfree gem: I see a lot of people on my facebook that think that expanding paternal and maternal leave will cause people to continuously have kids to avoid working. It's mostly old people who I'm assuming have forgotten what its like to actually have young children because holy poo poo I have two kids and who the gently caress would do that? loquacius posted:Yeah uh if your position is "I'm only paying $300 in rent to live in a house but I should be living rent-free" I'm sorry but I don't have very much sympathy for you Doesn't it seem weird at all? I've had a couple girlfriends live with me and a couple roommates. With the girlfriends, it was always a trust based financial partnership. With the roommates, they paid me their bills. It seems weird to mix the two. Maybe that's just me but it worked fine. I lived with my girlfriends but I rent to my roommates. As long as I was in a romantic relationship with someone, it was, very informally, their place as well. It seems like the girl feels like that's not the situation at all and I can imagine feeling weird about it. Also, even if I live there, I would feel weird paying someones entire house payment if it was their house. It doesn't really matter since your money is going towards something no matter what but I would still feel weird covering the cost of a house that I have no claim to. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 19:42 on Dec 8, 2016 |
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Dec 8, 2016 19:22
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loquacius posted:My [29/F] fiance's [32/M] ex-girlfriend [35?/F] texted him "Are you sure you want to get married?" My wife had a few exes contact her during our engagement to try and talk her out of it. It was bizarre. Each time she politely declined to even have the conversation and told them that it wasn't their concern. She also had two "nice guy" friends. One called her a cold hearted bitch for marrying someone he (the 'it's my job to protect you' thing) doesn't even know and the other told me that if I hurt her, he would hurt me and would be with her to take care of her.
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Dec 8, 2016 20:35
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childfree post posted:I never get mad or annoyed at children who are acting up, being loud or obnoxious or are generally pains in the asses. I have trained myself to remember that it's not the kid's fault - it's their parents fault. How hard is it to understand that kids are not tiny adults that always respond rationally? Great parents can have great kids that still act up sometimes. I'd be concerned if my kids didn't. For any goon parents out there, this reminds me of a fantastic trick I learned the other day. If your small child is acting up in a social situation where you need them to shut the hell up RIGHT NOW but they've worked themselves up, you can tell them "You seem upset. I wouldn't laugh if you're that upset. You better not laugh! Only happy people laugh!" and it'll snap them out of their tantrum because they'll try and fail to not laugh. flick my Mr. Bean fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Dec 10, 2016 |
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Dec 10, 2016 21:53
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