F1 2019-2020 offseason: Groverhaas

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > F1 2019-2020 offseason: Groverhaas

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DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

https://twitter.com/F1/status/1201881388464705537

fire vettel for fucks sake

# ? Dec 3, 2019 22:08

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# ? May 20, 2024 20:41

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

big crush on Chad OMG posted:

If you must use use office just use your work laptop like a normal person

I�d rather not have my updated resume just casually sitting on my work computer when my company just shitcanned a whole division two weeks ago and I�ve repeatedly been asked if I plan to jump ship this year.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 22:16

PhoenixFlaccus: Jul 15, 2011; KFC Famous Bowl

So this is the end of my first season in the thread(s) and I must say you are all very good lads that mean well. I never knew so many smooth and donkey brained people knew how to type. One smooth brain even works for Williams! So proud of you all. Looking forward to next year�s takes on kebabs. :allears:

# ? Dec 3, 2019 22:38

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Theophany posted:

Erm what if I want to jerk off to big tit furry anime porn whilst finishing up my report on the company's fiscal year???

You become a tifosi

# ? Dec 3, 2019 22:39

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016

Khablam posted:

I'm sorry Taeddsdje, but this semantic side-step might have partially worked if it was functionally correct.
There's an actual time and event that created the "worst thread".

I'm so excited for this reveal. It'll keep me going all off season.

Immolat1on posted:

https://twitter.com/SophiaFloersch/status/1201464970573168647

I don't understand what she's saying here. Is Chadwick getting given 25 points and floersch is saying she wouldn't need them?

PhoenixFlaccus posted:

So this is the end of my first season in the thread(s) and I must say you are all very good lads that mean well. I never knew so many smooth and donkey brained people knew how to type. One smooth brain even works for Williams! So proud of you all. Looking forward to next year’s takes on kebabs.

What the gently caress is this poo poo?

# ? Dec 3, 2019 22:53

Custard Undies: Jan 7, 2006; #essereFerrari

PhoenixFlaccus posted:

So this is the end of my first season in the thread(s) and I must say you are all very good lads that mean well. I never knew so many smooth and donkey brained people knew how to type. One smooth brain even works for Williams! So proud of you all. Looking forward to next year�s takes on kebabs.

I like to get a combo kebab (lamb & chicken), with cheese on top of the usual fillings. Usually go double meat and double garlic sauce!

What I'm saying is Kebabs rule!

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:06

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

Kebabs are poo poo just lmao if you aren�t getting a chicken or lamb shawarma wrap.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:12

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

9 years of this absolute trash fire for me.

The system is a sham if I�m not an elder.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:16

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

I�m not a narcissist in real life.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:16

mrfart: May 26, 2004; Dear diary, today I
became a captain.

Khablam posted:

No, there is another.

Well are you loving gonna tell us or is this gonna be some advent calendar type of posting event?

Anyway, reading the first page of the 04 thread is weird. Like reading something from the fifties. People are genuinely excited and positive about teams and drivers, it�s been a slow but steady sink into the swamp.
Oh no wait I forgot, there was some sort of apocalyptic turning point.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:16

DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

PhoenixFlaccus posted:

So this is the end of my first season in the thread(s) and I must say you are all very good lads that mean well. I never knew so many smooth and donkey brained people knew how to type. One smooth brain even works for Williams! So proud of you all. Looking forward to next year�s takes on kebabs.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:19

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

JUDGEMENT DAY

TOXX COLLECTION POST

1500quidporsche posted:

Lance will get on the podium at least twice in 2019 or I�ll eat a month

Cactrot posted:

I'll take a month if stroll gets two podiums next season

Wiltsghost posted:

Same, there is zero chance. He is loving garbage. Why do you guys love some rear end in a top hat who is only in the sport because his dad is rich.

edit: and i realize that applies to a lot of drivers

RIP 1500.

1500quidporsche posted:

Mods please ban me if LeClerc has less points than Vettel at the end of 2019

Spared from the ban though.

Khablam posted:

NtotheTC posted:
Also ban Khablam if Gasly beats Verstappen.

I'll accept this but I will 3x my Max beat his teammate posts as a result.

Safe.

Astoundingly Ugly Baby posted:

Ban me if Ricciardo wins a race in 2019.

Sadly safe :smith:

ImplicitAssembler posted:

I'll record myself doing a shoey if Ricciardo finishes ahead of Hulkenberg in the 2019 WDC standings.

AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OI OI OI (do the shoey).

geonetix posted:

With this recent honda news, iospace take note, i'll have a 3 month probe if RBR ends up in the top 3, and a month anytime max wins a race

I slipped on this one. Whoops.

Nybble posted:

Since I'm a F1 Thread newbie, I figure I better fit in and put in my own toxx for the upcoming season.

Leclerc will finish with more WDC points than Vettel in 2019.

Safe

OhsH posted:

ban me if lance stroll doesnt out perform kubica

Safe

big crush on Chad OMG posted:

Probate me for a week for every race Lewis Hamilton (🙌🏽) doesn�t win, and ban me if anyone else wins the WDC in 2019.

Welp, this is going to be a thing. 10 weeks.

Norns posted:

Just ban me if anyone but Merc wins the WDC I guess. gently caress it.

Rip Norns.

Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Sigh. Okay, let me get in on the fun.

I'll take a probe of whatever duration Iospace decides to hand down if Kimi podiums in a loving Sauber.

Safe

Frond posted:

If Kimi reaches the podium I will eat a completo while running on a treadmill.
I request an 11 year probation if Lance Stroll ever wins a race.

Safe

ilmucche posted:

I'll take the flipside of that.
Kimi will podium in 2019 (formula1). Bet you an avatar.

Not safe! DRJ gets to give ilmucche an avatar.

geonetix posted:

I�ll be fine.

In fact, iospace, given your concern about charities I�ll dump �100 into a charity of your choice if RBR makes top 2 end of season, even if I�m probed

Safe

big crush on Chad OMG posted:

I�ll donate $10 to charity for every race that Lewis doesn�t win. Bring it

100 to https://www.lls.org/ is the charity. Wicka has also agreed to match.

MazeOfTzeentch posted:

Because Dan > Max forever, gimme an hour of probate for every position of Renault powertrain-related grid penalty. Either delivered at the end of the season or at time of penalty.

Anyone want on the Power of Memes side of this one?

GramCracker posted:

Give me a month if RBR place higher in the WCC than Renault

Give me a month if Kvyat doesn't outperform Gasly

Give me 24h every time Are Chili is beat by that retarded looking brit with the star trek name that also races for McLaren

One month to Gram.

Kilonum posted:

If Haas doesn't score more points than Team Stroll this season I will eat a one week probation.

RIP

Schlesische posted:

Probate me one day for every point Racing Point is in front of Haas at the end of the season, because I don't want to post in a thread that has that many Strolls Shills posts.
If Max Verstappen finishes 3rd in the WDC at the end of the season I will write at least a 2500 word slashfic of Max/Dan with Max as a dom, and involve Christian Horner, to commemorate their obliteration of my hopes and dreams. If I fail to do this between Max becoming a mathematical certainty to finish at least third and the start of testing for the 2020 F1 season, ban me.
If Renault fail to make a single podium all year I will donate $AUD105 to VisionAustralia so that they can help Australians not make the same mistake Daniel Ricciardo has.
If Sebastian Vettel wins the WDC, probate me for a month as I will dreaming of the #megazone and how I will not be on the highway to it.
If Ferrari win the WCC I will allow a Tifosi to ~~vandalise my avatar and text~~ tastefully update my avatar and text.
Okay, I think that's everything.

48 days. Should spare you from the Habs. No Renault podiums either.

Hexyflexy posted:

gently caress it, I�ll take a month probe if Kube, the Polish Rose wins a race.

Safe

Wirth1000 posted:

Oh, come on. Even as the resident die hard Williams fan I already know this will never happen.

Permaban me if Kubica wins a race in 2019 in the Williams, thanks

Safe

julian assflange posted:

Ban me if Lewis Hamilton wins 11(eleven) or more Races in the 2019 Formula 1 World Championship

Guess what, 11 :v:

Powershift posted:

I don't like ban toxxes because i love you guys and don't want to go without you because williams suddenly pulls some magic rabbit out of their asses and challenges are Lance and Racing Point Lance GP for WDC.

so stop doing ban toxxes and come up with something more creative like buying williams/kube gear or donating to a good cause or cutting off a finger or something.

For example

If are Lance doesn't podium at least once this season, i will buy a Lance/LanceGP hat no matter how pink it is

Buy the hat.

NtotheTC posted:

if ferrari win either the WDC or the WCC I will buy gonzo archives so he can revel in the quagmire of the 2007 season thread. Or if he doesn't want to wait for season end I will donate to a charity of his choice

Safe.

Thanks Ants posted:

�50 to Sands if McLaren don't finish ahead of Racing Point this year

McLaren best of the rest, somehow

Gigi Galli posted:

If Ferrari win the title I will recreate a gross chippy box and eat it. Which is fine because I am disgusting fat slob.

What was the name of the thing that scottish guy was going to eat in TRP but then didn't because he was a big baby about it? Munch box?

Safe.

Theophany posted:

If a Ferrari driver doesn't win the WDC I will eat a proper English fish and chip dinner, complete with mushy peas, curry sauce and a saveloy.

I'll spare you all livestreaming my guts prolapsing out of my arse the following morning as I try to cup my cock and bollocks out of the way of the toilet pan for your viewing pleasure.

For the uninitiated, a saveloy is basically boiled horsemeat in a condom masquerading as a sausage.

EAT THE FOOD, THEO

OhsH posted:

New additional toxx. Ban me if kube gets a second season back in 2020 for any team as a full driver.

Back pocket'd.

Edward Mass posted:

If Haas do not score 150 WCC points, I will donate the US dollar amount of difference to the Something Awful Forums

For example, if Haas score only 149 points, I will donate $1. If they score zero points, I will donate $150.

122 dollars to the spine fund!

tuo posted:

if Bottas (hopefully) finishes in front of Hamilton in the China GP, I will put into the lowtax robotic spine fund by offering one plat code and one archive code in here

Safe

MustardFacial posted:

probe me for a week everytime Ferrari shows up with the fastest car, but then doesn't give up the win because of bad strategy or unreliability or Vettel gets nervous and forgets how to drive.

3 weeks

1500quidpoocati posted:

Probate me 4 a month if failed binboi Alonslow wins the 500 this year

Safe

GramCracker posted:

Lmbo I can’t wait to see Valtteri “Nico Rosberg” Bottas win the 2019 WDC

Rip in piss

Lou Takki posted:

Lance stroll will never win a F1 race

safe

welcome 2 Clown Town posted:

probate me for one week if lance "arguably one of the worst drivers on the grid" stroll makes it out of q1 in baku

safe

Mokotow posted:

Ban me for a month if Kubica qualifies or finishes a race at pos 15 or above this season. :toxx:

already fulfilled

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:30

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

Also, if you have a video toxx or some poo poo, you have till the end of the year to do it.

e: gotta recalculate Mustard Facial's.

iospace fucked around with this message at 23:36 on Dec 3, 2019

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:31

Immolat1on: Sep 9, 2005

ilmucche posted:

I don't understand what she's saying here. Is Chadwick getting given 25 points and floersch is saying she wouldn't need them?

Shes's more or less saying these women earning license points in Formula W are fooling themselves because none of them are fast enough to keep up in F3 or F2.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:33

marshalljim: Mar 6, 2013; yospos

I heard you guys were looking for some kebab-related reddit links
https://v.redd.it/wzu4r18jpsm11

# ? Dec 3, 2019 23:56

Thanks Ants: May 21, 2004; #essereFerrari

Schlesische post the slashfic

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:04

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

I'd like to point out I'm am not infact RIPing

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:12

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

iospace posted:

Buy the hat.

I'll order it by the end of dec, it's going to be worth it.

Norns posted:

I'd like to point out I'm am not infact RIPing

ahh, a ghost!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:15

DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

this thread will be really lonely.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:20

Powershift: Nov 23, 2009

DoctorGonzo posted:

this thread will be really lonely.

It's my thread now, and we're gonna talk about poutine and curling, so get your rocks and curds ready

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:21

DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

poutine is loving disgusting

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:23

pik_d: Feb 24, 2006; follow the white dove

TRP Post of the Month October 2021

DoctorGonzo posted:

poutine is loving disgusting

Wow, Khablam is gonna be poutine this in the access database for SURE

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:26

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

DoctorGonzo posted:

poutine is loving disgusting

MLYP

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:26

Khablam: Mar 29, 2012

Can we please all shut up about poutine before we get another tuos_poutine.jpg again

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:28

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

Would you prefer completo chat ?

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:33

DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

completos are the official food of the scuderiaferrarimissionwinslow off season thread

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:35

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016

Dirt road junglist let me know what I'm soon to be sporting as an avatar. Also if you want yours to be changed to something else let me know.

The Iceman cometh forth, but he cometh fourth

ilmucche@gmail.com if you want to surprise the thread elders

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:42

Tsaedje: May 11, 2007; BRAWNY BUTTONS 4 LYFE

Don't you worry I'm doing some hard-core data mining so I can make horrible graphs nobody is interested in. The thread will have content even if it's horrible.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 00:48

Hexyflexy: Sep 2, 2011; asymptotically approaching one

DoctorGonzo posted:

completos are the official food of the scuderiaferrarimissionwinslow off season thread

What else do you eat in Bolivia?

# ? Dec 4, 2019 01:02

Custard Undies: Jan 7, 2006; #essereFerrari

Powershift posted:

It's my thread now, and we're gonna talk about poutine and curling, so get your rocks and curds ready

I'm not Canadian, but I am totally down with this because these two things unironically rule!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 01:36

gret: Dec 12, 2005; goggle-eyed freak

Curling owns.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 01:45

Full Collapse: Dec 4, 2002

DoctorGonzo posted:

completos are the official food of the scuderiaferrarimissionwinslow off season thread

Those look nice.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 01:53

OhsH: Jan 12, 2008

Lmao i forgot my additional toxx

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:07

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

DoctorGonzo posted:

poutine is loving disgusting

Cool. Let's shove crushed avocado and mayo in a bread instead. Fantastic. I take it everyone in Chile is as loving insane and stupid as you are given the state of the nation if you can even call it one.

Look, I'm not angry but you're an idiot. If you think tuo's abomination was actual poutine then you're definitely stupid. Ignore whatever the gently caress garbage that was that he made. Trust me, I know beef stroganoff.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:29

wicka: Jun 28, 2007

To be fair to Chile, like 90% of their problems were caused by us.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:31

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

tuo's poutine was 100% caused by him and no one else is to blame for that atrocity.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:34

big nipples big life: May 12, 2014

gret posted:

Curling owns.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:34

Custard Undies: Jan 7, 2006; #essereFerrari

Big Huski Boi posted:

To be fair to Chile, like 90% of their problems were caused by us.

By us, you mean "The Worst Thread" right. Because that probably checks out.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:52

the paradigm shift: Jan 18, 2006

from some bbc article I didn't bother to read

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:56

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 20, 2024 20:41

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

https://www.motorsport.com/f1/news/abu-dhabi-drs-outage-server-crash/4605633/

Hahaha, a server crash is what hosed DRS for 18 laps. Amazing.

Behold the amazing supremacy of the extremely poo poo-tier bargain bin octopus that is Tata Enterprises on top of AWS which dabbles in the realm of fake completely made up numbers for car telemetry.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 03:05

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > F1 2019-2020 offseason: Groverhaas

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