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Flowers For Algeria posted:For the fifth anniversary of the Fun pranks for Jim to play on Dwight thread, actress Kate Flannery is asked to tell of her experience as a witness to Jim's many pranks. Mose may or may not be a dog. Jim starts calling Dwight "balloon boy." The office becomes infested by Tiny Jims. Jim is obsessed with Mars Needs Moms. Could it be a window into his twisted psyche? Jim is often nude except for a pair of tennis shoes. Cosmic Jim awakes! Whenever Jim's pet monkey, Chips, is not on screen, everyone should be asking, "where's Chips?" Dwight nurses a baby eagle back to health and names it Little Champion. Jim "soups up" the elevator in Dunder Mifflin. Jim runs for the position of city dogatcher. Jim opens Famous Original Jim's. The worst pizza place in all of Scranton, maybe in all of Pennsylvania. Dwight tells Jim to stop trying to sell "clown paper," whatever that is. Elon Musk always dresses as Waluigi. Jim vows to go all out because he "wants to get cancelled." Dwight gets tricked by Jim's squeaky shoe machine. Jim decides to "raise the steaks." -Jim goes to a public shower without shower sandals so that he catches athletes’ foot, then breaks into Dwight’s house and tries on all his socks so Dwight gets athletes’ foot also -Jim buys dosens of realistic fake skeletons, dresses them up in his coworkers’ clothes and arranges them in various poses around the office. When Dwight comes into work, he sees this and believes a plague has wiped out all life on earth overnight and that he’s the last man alive -Jim puts poison on Dwight’s glasses so when Dwight puts them on he gradually goes blind over the course of the day -Jim swaps all the furniture and everything in the office with the office next door so when Dwight walks in he’s confused and believes he’s walked into the wrong office -Jim calls Dwight’s home phone every night and breathes heavily into the receiver so Dwight believes he’s being harassed by a pervert -Dwight slips on a rollerskate and falls down the stairs into a tub of pudding that Jim has placed there Testikles posted:This was related to me by Ibn Battuta who travelled the world including Egypt. He learned of the story of Dwayt al-Shrood, an Egyptian who lived in the town of Al-Skrantaan which was famed for its paper. Dwayt al-Shrood was a paper merchant and a haughty man who falsely claimed he was of the Prophet's (peace be upon him) line, a Qurayshi. This made him the object of great sport for another such merchant named Jim al-Halburdi. Here is one such event: Precambrian posted:Over lunch, Dwight has a conversation with his coworker Jim about the camera crews that will be coming to their office in Scranton to shoot a documentary about Tom, a depressed coworker of theirs who killed himself, and how it impacted the office culture. Neither of them think highly of the documentary, especially because they know their boss will try to hijack it into a parody of self-aggrandizing behavior. Jim pitches that they should lean into that—play up their personalities for the camera until the crew decides to make the documentary instead about their weird office culture. Dwight likes the idea—they already have a friendly rivalry, with Jim pranking him every so often, and that'll be catnip for the cameras. Jim will up the effort of the pranks and Dwight will sell them with his intense frustrations. Both men find the idea hilarious and know that Michael is too self-absorbed to realize this behavior is off. A Fancy Hat posted:Jim joins forces with Dwight's other enemies and creates the Dwight Revenge Squad. Funky See Funky Do posted:Dwight calls for help after being badly pranked by Jim. poisonpill posted:Jim emails around a brochure for a conference. It's going to be trade show, and several major law firms, universities, and other paper-intensive organizations will be there shopping for new suppliers on office equipment, including paper. Jim claims that he can't go due to "Captain Crunchitis", so someone else will go in his stead. Stanley and Dwight are chosen. They book flights, a shared hotel room for three nights, and a taxi to the airport. Dwight is looking forward to a few prank-free days on the road, even with a grump like Stanley. When they arrive at the hotel, they check in , have dinner, and retire to their room. Dwight is comically over-prepared, and brought ear muffs to help him sleep despite Stanley's snoring. They form an unlikely friendship, and the next morning head down in to the hotel ballroom, ready to take on the world. Except that there is no conference. The place is empty. Dwight's cell rings; it's Jim. John Wick of Dogs posted:Jim buys a car of the same make and model of Dwight's. He pays a few thousand dollars to get it repainted the same color. John Wick of Dogs posted:Jim pays off the US National Debt with a credit card in Dwight's name poisonpill posted:The soda machine keeps stealing Dwight’s money and he can’t figure out how Jim made it happen. Everyone keeps Dwight to let it go, Jim isn’t doing it. But Dwight can’t shake the feeling that this is part of Jim’s plan. Somehow, Jim keeps making the machine jam, because it only does so when Dwight is buying sodas. poisonpill posted:Dwight casually asks Jim for the paperwork on an order that was processed last week. In actuality, Jim has been falsifying records of his sales for the past three months because he "needed more time for pranks", and is now very close to being discovered because none of his accounts are adding up. In a frenzy and with a suspicious squeak to his voice, he says "Sure thing, Dwight! I... uh... just need to find it! It's uh... buried under all the other sales records I've made this month." Dwight nods and goes back to his work trying to balance the month's accounts. "Sure, Jim," he replies, "Just get me the sales record when you ferret it out." Upgrade posted:After hearing Dwight talk about the new Animal Crossing game for Switch, Jim threatens to have his "uncle at Nintendo" cancel the game to get back at Dwight for stealing his second biggest client. (In reality Jim ignored several phonecalls from the client - telling Dwight that he keeps pranker's hours - and finally the frustrated client called Dwight, begging for someone to sell them paper). Dwight scoffs at Jim and goes on with his day. A Fancy Hat posted:While driving to work, Dwight discovers a tiny bald eagle by the side of the road with a damaged wing. FunkyAl posted:Jim pranks Dwight by pouring itching powder down his back, and it's the last straw. After years of abuse, Dwight stands up for himself, calling Jim out as a bully in front of the entire office. To Dwight's surprise, Jim agrees. He asks, wouldn't you like to get a little revenge? Dwight usually isn't one to hold a grudge, but the fury is still fresh in his mind. Why sure, why not get a little revenge. Z. Autobahn posted:It’s mid-afternoon, still early for a drink, but the wanderer orders one just the same. A Fancy Hat posted:A reporter for the Scranton Times shows up at Schrute Farms and knocks on the door. Angela, now in her late 60s, opens the door. Libra posted:One morning, a man in a mustard yellow shirt shows up to the office and everyone falls silent, looking up from their work. Jim does a double take when he looks up from his desk and sees that the man appears to be Dwight's exact double! "Hey everyone," says the doppelganger, "did you miss me?" Pastel Candy Snake posted:Phyllis finally has enough of Jim's pranks and decides to do something about it. A Fancy Hat posted:After a disastrous fiscal quarter, Dunder Mifflin is looking to make major cuts in spending. One of the board members suggests that they fire the lowest performing salesman at each branch. Somebody fucked around with this message at 12:53 on Mar 18, 2024 |
# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 08:51 |
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# ¿ May 14, 2024 14:09 |
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-Jim tricks Dwight into buying thousands of dollars worth of spaceship .jpegs by dangling the promise of lavish backer rewards for a game that will never be finished -Jim and Pam keep passing notes to each other to trick Dwight into thinking they’re planning a prank. Dwight intercepts one of the notes. When he opens it, a fine white powder spills out, prompting Dwight to panic and run out of the office screaming about anthrax -Jim pees in all of Dwight’s desk drawers so when Dwight opens his desk he discovers all his possessions have been soaked in urine -Jim rearranges all the keys on Dwight’s keyboard so they spell out insulting racial slurs. -Jim and Pam swap clothes and pretend to be each other. Everyone else at the office participates in the plan to gaslight Dwight, causing Dwight to freak out.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:02 |
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-Jim keeps mugging the camera whenever Dwight takes a sip of coffee, prompting Dwight to believe the coffee has been tampered with. There’s nothing wrong with the coffee but now Dwight’s morning is ruined. -Jim entices paper wasps to build their nest in Dwight’s car. When Dwight opens the door, he is swarmed by angry wasps which sting him repeatedly. -Jim tricks Dwight into thinking he’s glued all the office furniture to the ceiling but really Jim only glued himself and Dwight to the ceiling. -Jim steals Stanley’s morning doughnut and hides it in Dwight’s desk so Stanley thinks Dwight took it. This prank actually backfires because Stanley knows Jim took it and he dresses Jim down for acting a fool. Stanley’s comments are incisive and accurate and the next time Jim speaks directly to the camera it’s apparent he’s been crying.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:11 |
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-Jim gives Dwight trick gumdrops which are encrusted with pure capsaicin crystals instead of sugar. Dwight loses all sensation of taste and smell for six weeks. -Jim puts out an ad in the paper requesting a black man for cuckold play and lists Dwight as the point of contact. He leaves the ad where Angela can see, prompting her to freak out and start shrieking at Dwight. -Jim buys a car just like Dwight’s and parks in Dwight’s spot, tricking Dwight into thinking there’s a time paradox taking place.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:26 |
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-Jim chews up a mouthful of peanuts into mush and waits patiently. Dwight yawns. Jim leaps up and spits the peanut mush into Dwight’s open mouth mama bird style, causing Dwight to choke and vomit violently -Dwight shows up to work to discover his desk draped in black ribbon. There’s a photo of Dwight that reads “in memorial.” Everyone in the office pretends Dwight is invisible and inaudible. -Jim raises Dwight’s house up onto a flatbed truck and drives it to a different town while Dwight is asleep. -Jim puts on all his clothes backwards and preteds Dwight has stepped into the bizarro universe
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:43 |
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-Jim slips viagra into Dwight’s morning coffee so that Dwight gets a four-hour erection and has to be hospitalized for priapism. -Jim chugs an entire gallon of milk and then vomits milk directly onto Dwight.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:46 |
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-Jim goes to the grocery stroe and buys up all the yogurt Dwight likes so that Dwight can’t have it. He waits until Dwight is desperate, then offers to sell at an exorbitant price (which Dwight grudgingly pays). -Jim hires an Ayn Rand impersonator to come to the office. It’s the same prank as the Ben Franklin one except Dwight is gushing and fawning over her. -Jim steals Dwight’s towel at the gym and wipes his rear end on it so Deight gets pinkeye.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:53 |
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-Dwight comes into work and is mortified to discover his entire deviantart gallery has been printed out and hung up around the office. Jim confesses to the camera that he’s so disturbed by Dwight’s art he can no longer derive joy from Dwight’s humiliation. -Jim wears Dwight’s underwear and shits in them before putting them back in Dwight’s underwear drawer.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 09:58 |
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Who What Now posted:Jim tells everyone that he just caught Dwight jacking off in the bathroom, and the only way for Dwight to save his job is to admit that he got his dick mangled when it was bitten by one of his goats last week and he is thus incapable of getting an erection. Cut to the interview room where Jim smugly admits he already knew this because the goat who bit Dwight's dick was Jim in disguise. Classic Jim
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:06 |
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- Jim moves the entire town of Scranton ten miles to the east so Dwight has to slam on the brakes when he unexpectedly comes to the end of the highway on the rim of a huge Scranton-shaped ditch. - Jim spends years breeding a special variety of superbee that is ten times more aggressive and deadly than killer bees. On the day of the company football game, he replaces the football with their beehive right before Dwight is supposed to deliver the kickoff. - Jim boards Dwight up in a giant gift box and labels it with a huge tag that reads "Do not open 'til X-mas!" - Jim buys Dwight tickets to Jurassic World. Not the feature film, but the actual theme park with dinosaurs. Jim mugs the camera as he disables the security fences. - Jim conceals a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise in his trousers and walks up to Dwight's desk with his hand down his pants. Dwight demands to know what Jim is doing. In response, Jim unzips his fly and unloads a stream of mayonnaise all over Dwight's face. - Jim steals Dwight's keys and buries them. He leaves a shovel and a treasure map on Dwight's desk.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:18 |
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- Jim is eating a comically small sandwich for lunch. When Dwight comments derisively on the size of the sandwich, Jim bets him that Dwight couldn't even eat half the sandwich. Dwight accepts the bet. It's only after he takes a bite that he discovers the "sandwich" is just Jim's dick between two slices of bread. Jim smirks at the camera. - Jim drives over Dwights car with a steamroller. Dwight barely escapes by crawling out the rear window when the stress of the deforming superstructure causes the glass to shatter. - Dwight decides to try and prank Jim for once. He balances a bucket of water on the top of the door. Jim opens the door and the bucket falls on his head, soaking him. Dwight pulls off his disguise and reveals he was Jim all along and that "Jim" was really Dwight in disguise. - Jim complains to the network about the sexual content in Battlestar Galactica and gets it pulled from all local channels the night before the big season finale. Dwight is devastated.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:26 |
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- Jim replaces Dwight's desk with a replica molded from C4 and replaces Dwight's chair with a dynamite plunger. - Jim hangs around the park at night wearing a Dwight mask. He hides in the bushes and when a woman walks by, he leaps out and grabs their breasts. After a few consecutive nights of this, the police show up at the office with a warrant for Dwight's arrest. Jim smirks as the struggling Dwight is hauled off in handcuffs. - Jim replaces all of Dwight's pens with trick pens that burst into flames when Dwight tries to write with them.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:31 |
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Jim breaks into Dwight's house and threatens him with a gun. Once Dwight is sobbing and begging for his life, Jim pulls off his mask and reveals it was all a joke. Dwight looks like a total idiot.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:39 |
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Tiberius Christ posted:After hours of vigorous love-making, Dwight lays next to Pam satisfied with his revenge, "How was it?" he asks. lol Dwight is so gullible!
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:44 |
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Jim replaces Dwight's replica of Sauron's Ring of Power with the real thing. Corrupted by the Ring's power, Dwight gradually transforms into a pathetic, Gollum-like creature over the course of several centuries.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:49 |
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935 posted:Toby Flenderson walks calmly to Jim and Dwight's cubicles and pulls a 357 magnum out of his waistband. Jim's eyes open wide but before he can get a word out Toby squeezes five rounds of lead into Jim's chest. Toby pauses before firing the final round, the camera zooms out and we see why - a medieval spiked mace fills the spot where Toby's skull used to be. Dwight holds firm on the handle. As Toby's limp body collapses to the floor, a horrified Jim rises from his chair, unbuttoning his shirt and revealing the blood squibs. "DWIGHT WHAT THE gently caress IT WAS ONLY A PRANK, YOU KILLED TOBY" Michael Scott punishes Dwight as a formality but makes it a slap on the wrist.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:51 |
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Dwight comes in and sees that his entire desk is encased in a cube of gelatin. When he reaches in to try and pull out his belongings, he discovers to his horror that the cube of gelatin is actually a Gelatinous Cube and that he is being inexorably sucked deeper into the creature's corrosive innards.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:53 |
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Jim vaccinates Dwight, causing the already autistic Dwight to develop double-autism.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 13:57 |
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Jim traps Dwight in a labyrinth that goes on forever.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 14:07 |
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Jim replaces the practice boards in Dwight's karate class with ceramic replicas. Dwight punches one as a demonstration of his martial prowess and ends up needing twelve stitches in his hand. Several other students also end up in the emergency room with mild to severe lacerations.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 14:10 |
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Jim comes to work with a remote-controlled vibrating egg in his rear end and gives the remote to Dwight, telling him it's the new remote dimmer for the office lights. Jim smirks at the camera before his eyes roll back in his head at the onset of his first of several prostate-induced orgasms.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 14:33 |
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Jim replaces all the matter in Dwight's lunch with anti-matter. Dwight takes a bite and the resulting explosion cracks the earth's crust down to the mantle.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 14:39 |
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a hot gujju bhabhi posted:Jim eviscerates Dwight as he screams for his mother. Wait, who is screaming for his mother, Dwight or Jim?
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 14:50 |
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Cubone posted:- When Jim comes in, he pulls out a stapler encased in jell-o out of his desk and accuses Dwight of putting his stapler in jell-o. Dwight has no idea what he's talking about, of course, because Jim put his own stapler in the jell-o, a play on when he played this prank many times on Dwight. Jim begins to berate Dwight, calling this pointless, childish behavior. Jim calls Dwight a smirking bully who plays mean pranks on his awkward coworker for no reason other than his own sick amusement. Dwight, taken aback, asks Jim if he's okay. Jim, now near tears, demands to know why Dwight can't just say that he's sorry, why he can't just grow up, why does he have to hurt people? "Insecure! Worthless!" he spits, "You should have did them all a favor and just jumped that night in Havana, you son of a bitch!" Jim spins and furiously throws the jello stapler at the wall, hard enought to break the stapler and send the jell-o splattering outward. "gently caress!"Jim screams, tears now running down his face, and punches his desk, putting a dent into it and bloodying his own knuckles. He storms out of the room, frustrated curse words escaping in a low rasp from his throat. I keep coming back to appreciate this one.
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# ¿ Mar 18, 2019 16:47 |
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My grandfather told me once that inside each of us there are two office workers: a Jim and a Dwight. They are locked together in an eternal prank war. "Who will win?" I asked my grandfather. He answered "Whichever one you feed."
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 01:11 |
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Jim sits down at his desk opposite Dwight. After a few minutes he reaches into his desk drawer and pulls out a Slim Jim jerky stick and gets his snack on. When he notices Dwight is watching him, Jim says, smugly "too bad you don't have a snack named after you." "Oh, no?" asks Dwight, smirking arching his eyebrow. Jim cocks his head inquisitively. Dwight reaches into his desk and retrieves a brown paper bag labeled "Dwight Bites" in handwritten sharpie. They're beef jerky bits Dwight makes himself back at his farm. Dwight pops one in his mouth and goes "Mmmm. So good." Jim nods and purses his lips, impressed despite himself. Dwight has won this round.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 01:18 |
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- Dwight bites into his lunchtime sandwich and gags. He drops the sandwich to the floor and —still gagging— pulls something rubbery from between his lips. He realizes with horror that it's a used condom and vomits onto his desk. Jim smirks at the camera.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 01:21 |
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Jim pees in a cup and throws it at Dwight in the parking lot. It’s AIDS pee and now Dwight has AIDS
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 03:53 |
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Jim and Dwight, locked in mortal combat, tumble together over Reichenbach Falls. Neither of ther bodies are found.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 03:58 |
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- Jim replaces the salmon roe on Dwight's sushi lunch with spider eggs. Dwight doesn't notice anything amiss until a few hours later when hundreds of baby spiders begin pouring from his nose and mouth. Jim did this to get back at Dwight for not holding the door for him earlier.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 07:05 |
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- Jim cyberbullies Dwight into eating a bunch of eggs for charity, but the result is anticlimactic and doesn't put Jim in the best light.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 07:19 |
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fdjkbnadjnbkjldaf posted:Anyone think it was weird that at the end of the show Dwight said that Pam was his best friend. They barely interacted, literally never hung out, and she was just as much a shithead prankster towards him as Jim was. I thought it was a weird and not at all believable reconciliation between him and Pam at the end of the show. Who would you nominate as Dwight’s best friend?
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 07:59 |
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Jim and Pam just blow off work to feed ducks at the park. Where’s Dwight? He’s been ground up into duck feed.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 08:01 |
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As Dwight Schrute awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a giant insect. “Jiiiiiiiim!”
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 08:21 |
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- Jim saves up all his earwax for months then gives it to Dwight as a candle.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 08:23 |
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- Dwight comes in to work and discovers his desk has been rotated 90 degrees into the fourth dimension
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 09:05 |
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- Jim sneaks into Dwight's house at night and builds an exact replica of the office around him so when Dwight wakes up the next morning, Jim is sitting there clucking his tongue at how shameful it is that Dwight was asleep at his desk.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 10:57 |
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-Jim wears springy eyeball glasses to work and makes faces at Dwight from across the desk. Dwight at first dismisses Jim's childish behavior, but after several minutes of Jim's leering he gets fed up and stomps around to Jim's side of the desk. "Take those off right now!" he demands, swiping the novelty glasses off Jim's face. He looks down. The frames are empty. He looks over at Jim. Jim's eyeballs dangle comically from his eyesockets. Jim has actually popped them out of their sockets. Dwight screams and stumbles backward over a trashcan onto the floor. Jim mugs a blank wall where he thinks the camera is.
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 15:10 |
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Jim replaces Dwight's phone with a clay phone. When Dwight touches it, his hand suddenly starts to turn into clay. Dwight realizes what is happening and throws down the phone in horror, but the clay effect is spreading up his arm. Soon his torso is turning into clay, his clothes, his legs, his other arm... he's screaming and screaming as the transformation crawls up his neck and begins to overtake his face. His screams become muffled as his head is finally transformed into clay. The last thing to go are his eyes, which roll wildly in their clay sockets before they, too, become clay. The transformation doesn't stop at Dwight. The carpet under Dwight's feet begins to transform, spreading out in expanding circles from where his shoes touch the ground. It creeps over the furniture and up the walls. The others try to flee, but it's too late. Wherever the clay touches them becomes a seed point for the transformation. Soon they are all consumed. Jim is the last to be transformed, he laughs as his body turns into clay from the bottom up. He mugs the camera just as his face becomes immobilized in clay. Dunder Mifflin is still now. Quiet. The camera pulls back and away and you see the entire office is just a diorama in a shoebox on a child's desk at school. The project title is written on a carboard display behind the diorama. "My Paper Company by Michael Scott"
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 15:46 |
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# ¿ May 14, 2024 14:09 |
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Who What Now posted:Dwight eats Michael's poo poo out of a bowl. "Dwight, this is a court order. It says you can't eat poo poo anymore!"
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# ¿ Mar 19, 2019 15:51 |